RELATIONSHIPS: helping wizards deplete their mana since 2011

[Atramental]

"...like your potentially dead baby sister's corpse."

[Rahxephon91]

Shit is infuriatingly funny in a different way from Rah's total infuriating-but-won't-listen way.

I did listen. I tried things. Nothing got better for me. It's whatever.

[tiesto]

Went on my date tonight, she was pretty nice and I think into me... she gave me a second hug when I told her I want to see her again when she gets back from her Labor Day vaca, and she was doing light touching while conversing, flicking her hair... the obvious signs. She was pretty easy to talk to, fairly outgoing (though she claimed she was shy). She is from the same town as my ex, and around the same age... I said "oh, I know some people from -town-... do you know someone named D?" and she said that my ex was in her English class, but didn't say whether or not she was friends with her (my ex didn't have any HS friends from what she told me because they all found her to be annoying  )

[thisismyusername]

[note: she had a blank tinder bio]

Way to edit her name in the first one, and then not in the second. 

Back away from Amber. Real slowly.

Or, if you want to go for it: Ask her if she wants you to choke her until she's blue like her baby sister.

[Bebpo]

Sorry, only registered users can see this content. Please Login or Register.

[chronovore]

Sorry, only registered users can see this content. Please Login or Register.

[Raist]

Sorry, only registered users can see this content. Please Login or Register. 

I just find it amusing that you're making a distinction between 29 and 25yo.

And seem to imply 29 is "old".

spoiler (click to show/hide)

fuck you

[close]

Sorry, only registered users can see this content. Please Login or Register.

She wanted the D.

[Mupepe]

29 years is old. They probably have a few grey hairs, wrinkles, her tits are not as perky and think of all the emotional baggage. And worst of all she has probably already had her period at that age!

[toku]

29 is a great age

old enough to have probably been kicked in the groin by life but young enough to still wanna know how deep the rabbit hole pwussy goes

[Valkyrie]

When do pubes go grey?

Asking for a friend.

[Mupepe]

When do pubes go grey?

Asking for a friend.

Grey pubes are so fucking hot

[chronovore]

When do pubes go grey?

Asking for a friend.

40 for me. Er, chest and beard. The rest is as auburn as ever.

[I'm a Puppy!]

Pubes never go grey if you don't have any pubes

[Rufus]

When do pubes go grey?

Asking for a friend.

I recently discovered one, too. Early thirties here.

[TakingBackSunday]

My grey hairs on my beard are going to be interesting looking.

[Rufus]

You're gonna have a calico thing going, huh?

[CatsCatsCats]

I've got a few stray greys in my hair and some funny ones in my eyebrows @ 29

My deepest desire for my hair is that it stays relatively thick and goes full white

[Rufus]

More like Willie Nelson.

[TakingBackSunday]

You're gonna have a calico thing going, huh?

I think so.  It's probably going to look a lot like this:



just, you know, not nearly as sexy

[toku]

I'm hoping to maybe grow 2 or 3 inches and bulk up to pull off an idris elba in Luther look myself 👌🏾

[Atramental]

Me in 30 or so years:


Except crazier and not as intelligent.

[nudemacusers]

Breeders fucking suck.

[Valkyrie]

Always practice safe breeding.

[Atramental]

Ah. My "date" for today cancelled because a "friend is coming into town last minute" but she's down to re-schedule so there's that. 

Well, that at least gives me time to work on this dumb annual report I didn't do Friday because I was so fucking tired...

[toku]

Ah. My "date" for today cancelled because a "friend is coming into town last minute" but she's down to re-schedule so there's that. 

Well, that at least gives me time to work on this dumb annual report I didn't do Friday because I was so fucking tired...

good now don't post in this thread again until the date and don't overthink it

[thisismyusername]

Don't listen to Toku. Totally overthink it, and post in here so I have comedy.

Then jack off before the date and have a good time.

[seagrams hotsauce]

disregard timu's post except the jerkin' off part

[Atramental]

We're gonna meet up this Wednesday.

In the meantime I'll try to set something up with another girl.

[Valkyrie]

Atra, please try some of these and report back to us

[Atramental]

Never. I'm a gentleman (when courting women).

[Tasty]

Never. I'm a gentleman (when courting women).

Are you writing crowns of sonnets? If not, then you ain't no gentleman.

[toku]

Never. I'm a gentleman (when courting women).

Are you writing crowns of sonnets? If not, then you ain't no gentleman.

no but they each get novels in this thread

[chronovore]

Never. I'm a gentleman (when courting women).

Are you writing crowns of sonnets? If not, then you ain't no gentleman.

no but they each get novels in this thread

 

[nudemacusers]

Never. I'm a gentleman (when courting women).

Are you writing crowns of sonnets? If not, then you ain't no gentleman.

no but they each get novels in this thread

[Valkyrie]

Never. I'm a gentleman (when courting women).

A Real Man(™️) can do both. ez

[thisismyusername]

Regard timu's post especially the jerkin' off part

FTFY. At this point, Atra won't stop overthinking so I want the comedy.

But seriously: Atra. As you already posted with those two girls: You have the ability to actually get dates, there's no need to work-shop. The problem with you is that you keep thinking badly (and I say that as a fellow major depressive) to where your "jokes" fall flat because they make no sense and come out of no where. The "romantic" bit especially. You have to ease into the conversation on that, which takes practice.

[seagrams hotsauce]

Never. I'm a gentleman (when courting women).

Are you writing crowns of sonnets? If not, then you ain't no gentleman.

no but they each get novels in this thread

son 

[seagrams hotsauce]

Also saying shit like "I'm a gentleman" is wack af listen to more geto boys u lame nerd

[tiesto]

Girl I went out with on Thursday has been texting me back a lot. She wants to get together next weekend after she gets back from NC!

Talked to some people at EZoo but didn't really get anywhere. Still, getting some smiles from cute girls is always a nice boost to the fragile ol' ego. And on an unrelated note (but cuz Toku is a regular in this thread), someone had a giant cross that said "Bless Up" on it, they were in front of me at the main stage during Zedd's set.

[Huff]

Girl and I are now on to the sending memes to each other on instagram stage. Getting pretty serious

[Huff]

Also, choke sex 

[Atramental]

Question: is "I really need a lightbulb changed" a euphemism for "come over and fuck me silly" ? 

[Rufus]

Go forth and screw.

[thisismyusername]

Question: is "I really need a lightbulb changed" a euphemism for "come over and fuck me silly" ? 

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Yes, you fucking moron. If it's out of the blue and out of context on the lightbulb being old. But come the fuck on.

[close]

[Atramental]

She's 50+ miles away. 

[hampster]

She's 50+ miles away. 

Send her some energy efficient LEDs. Then she won't need to change bulbs for 10 years

[eleuin]

why are you talking to someone so far away

[thisismyusername]

She's 50+ miles away. 

That's an hours drive. It's Labor Day weekend. Go, you stupid.

[Atramental]

I've got an annual report due. It's my neck if I don't get it done this weekend. 

edit: seriously, fuck my job...

[thisismyusername]

I've got an annual report due. It's my neck if I don't get it done this weekend. 

edit: seriously, fuck my job...

There's this wonderful thing called: the cloud. Go fuck her, then work on her PC.

[Rahxephon91]

Yeah because that's what a casual sex chick wants. You staying at her place doing office work.

[thisismyusername]

Like I said: It's labor day weekend. Screw her, do the work, screw her again, then have hot dogs and beer or whatever the hell normal people do.

50 miles away is 1 hour (if that: 2 if counting round trip) and you have Monday off. There's really no excuse to not do it.

[Rahxephon91]

You sound like someone who either doesn't actually have casual sex or hasn't seen Seinfeld.

[Atramental]

It's too late now. I already blew her off and said I can't "change her lightbulb" until Saturday.

Whatever. I have about 9 different women I haven't messaged yet and 1 that I'm seeing this Wednesday.

[toku]

he grows stronger

[CatsCatsCats]

I don't think an hour drive is a big deal but I'm like an hour from anywhere good so maybe I'm biased

[Atramental]

Most of my matches are many miles away.

That's what I get for not living in an expensive as fuck, densely populated metropolis.

[tiesto]

So, wanna talk about it being a small world?

I was leaving EZoo today (its last day), and while walking out, a dude with a North Face tee says hello to me, that he's seen me around at a few of the tents. So we got to talking... I find out he's from New Hyde Park, where one of my exes lives. Long-time followers of this thread may remember that particular ex as the tomboy who couldn't be arsed to fix herself up or improve her life situation in any way. Anyways...

I asked if he knows J. and he's like... wait a minute... did she work at a promotional products company? And I'm like... holy shit, yeah she did. And he's like "did she have a Yankees tattoo"... I'm just like "oh my god, that's her! That's one of my ex's!". Then he said she was his boss before he left! He also said that he'd play edm around the office and she hated it, lol... I said, I bet I'm the reason why 

So basically in the last week, I met 2 people who knew my last 2 exes

[Bebpo]

Sorry, only registered users can see this content. Please Login or Register.

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

I finally turned a corner.  I've finally been able to start coming inside of my girlfriend.  I pretty much stopped masturbating for the past few weeks, suspecting the death grip was the culprit.  It took maybe 45 minutes but I did it.