Meme Machine Memorial Thread of Things You Saw on Reddit

[Eric P]

Charlie Brooker is fucking awesome, and Shitpeas is amazing as the generic fucktard voice of britain.

Gameswipe was a great stab at bringing gaming to the masses, hope he gets a full series.

i don't know how he'd turn it into a weekly for half an hour in the format it was presented

[cool breeze]

omfg that was fucking awesome

makes me want to watch that show (after checking out what it is on wikipedia)

you should.  Check out Screenwipe too, which deals with other TV shows instead of just news.  There is also a Gameswipe that seems like a one time deal but is apparently getting more episodes because it was popular.

annihilating Susan Boyle
[youtube=560,345]kYbL8BwTqnk[/youtube]

praising The Wire
[youtube=560,345]sZ2iGYwdEi8[/youtube]

i don't know how he'd turn it into a weekly for half an hour in the format it was presented

yeah, games aren't nearly interesting enough for a show every week or even every month unless it's just him hating on a single game like Zero Punctuation, and I don't know if I'd really care for that.

[Brehvolution]

Ok, then I'm grateful.

[drew]

wrong thread

[Raban]

I was just reading ActionButton.net's review of Final Fantasy XIII and I read something interesting.

No! Let’s talk about Dragon Quest IX. Just for a second: when Square-Enix announced Dragon Quest IX, they said it would be a multiplayer-action-based RPG-like-thing for the Nintendo DS. They said the game was done development and would be out by the end of the year. A group of human hemorrhoids flared up on Amazon.co.jp, squealing that they are no good at action games and that this announcement is the worst news they have ever received in their life. Some people — again, this is serious (maybe) — actually threatened suicide. This was right before Monster Hunter Portable 2nd was released and became certifiably more of a megahit than the first Monster Hunter Portable, causing all the number-grinding completionist jerks to go, “oh maybe we like action games too lol”. To summarize this paragraph, Square-Enix were so convinced that their risk would pay off in the long run that they developed a game in which they had confidence. Then a couple of jerks complained and they delayed the game for two fucking years so they could shoehorn the same old menu system back into it.

Is this true? If so, Jesus fucking Christ developers need to stop listening to their fans.

[The Sceneman]

You are such a genius troll everbody is impressed!!!!!

Haters gonna hate.

And now, Act 2!

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=19515980&postcount=639

very good!

[CajoleJuice]

[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

And I'll have to find those shows somewhere, swaggaz. Checked a few torrent sites and they didn't have the first season of Newswipe.

[Howard Alan Treesong]

[Eric P]

oh, Gary

[Great Rumbler]

"Brazen strumpets"

[Joe Molotov]

(Image removed from quote.)

I put on my robe and my wizard hat.

[bork]

Ninja Mullet
[youtube=560,345][/youtube]

[Phoenix Dark]

Kanye at it again

http://2dopeboyz.okayplayer.com/2010/01/29/kanye-west-well-fuck-your-coloring-book/#more-79960

fuck yo coloring book distinguished black fellow

[brawndolicious]

WE WERE BORN NAKED! FRESH IS AN OPINION, LOVE IS OBJECTIVE, TASTE IS SELECTIVE, AND EXPRESSION IS MY FAVORITE ELECTIVE.

this is amazing, what made him snap?

[Phoenix Dark]

Sounds like the fashion nazis laughed his stuff off the run way.

[Joe Molotov]

Kanye at it again
(Image removed from quote.)
http://2dopeboyz.okayplayer.com/2010/01/29/kanye-west-well-fuck-your-coloring-book/#more-79960

fuck yo coloring book distinguished black fellow

tl;dr

[ferrarimanf355]

[youtube=560,345]P_fa3bf12bs[/youtube]

So, Criterion Games showed off their Need for Speed game in an internal EA meeting. Here's hoping that it's Hot Pursuit 3... 

[HyperZoneWasAwesome]

The trailer for the 'how-in-the-fuck-did-this-get-localized' PSP Cho-Aniki game is off the charts wacky jappy, but the true amusement comes from the befuddlement of the Gametrailers audience.

ah, gay panic, what would I do without you (although, to be fair, I'd be really damn careful about who I let see me play that game).

[Joe Molotov]

(Image removed from quote.)

Scorpion

[The Fake Shemp]

GET OVER HERE!!!

[Phoenix Dark]

[youtube=560,345]oRgCOXaiDjQ[/youtube]

Check out this astonishing political ad in the upcoming New Orleans elections. The ad from Dwight McKenna, a candidate for Orleans Parish Coroner, attacks the incumbent coroner, Frank Minyard, as a Dr. Frankenstein who sells body parts -- complete with an assistant Igor, from out of the old Universal Studios movies!

"Igor! Igor!" the mad scientist says.

"Yes, Doctor!" the hunchbacked assistant replies.

"We need a heart, a spleen, and a liver, for tonight's sale!"

"Yes, Dr. Minyard!"

All of us here at TPM initially thought this was too good to be true. But Kevin Allman from The Gambit assured us that it is in fact running on local television, and that he himself saw it just last night during a commercial break in the mayoral debate.

omg 

[Raban]

I was just reading ActionButton.net's review of Final Fantasy XIII and I read something interesting.

Is this true? If so, Jesus fucking Christ developers need to stop listening to their fans.

Yeah that business decision really bit them in the ass. 

Goddamnit that's a sad story.

God that review is good

At a job, we don’t mind the menial tasks because they all feel in service of a greater good: most of the time, that means a paycheck. Final Fantasy XIII asks you to work overtime every night for a month, and on day 29, it tells you the company is shutting down, and you’re all fired, so go find an adequate-sized broom closet in which to cry about your money while you fuck yourself.

In all seriousness (maybe not), the game would probably have no challenge at all if that map didn’t rotate.

But this is the best one a sick burn to all the uguu nerds

and the “cute” girl (Vanille) with all the personality depth and texture of “Dora the Explorer”, for people who would rather fight the supreme court for the right to marry a body pillow than pay a real hot-blooded stripper for a lap dance. Many such men will play Final Fantasy XIII and actually like Vanille, and actually wish they could find a “real” girl like her.

Tim Rogers

[Diunx]

(Image removed from quote.)

http://www.muslima.com/success.cfm

at third testimonial.

[Raban]

I didn't know muslims had ninjas.

[Howard Alan Treesong]

[EmCeeGrammar]

Based on some youtube stuff I see, elmo needs his own late night show on pbs or something.

[Great Rumbler]

[youtube=560,345]oRgCOXaiDjQ[/youtube]

Check out this astonishing political ad in the upcoming New Orleans elections. The ad from Dwight McKenna, a candidate for Orleans Parish Coroner, attacks the incumbent coroner, Frank Minyard, as a Dr. Frankenstein who sells body parts -- complete with an assistant Igor, from out of the old Universal Studios movies!

"Igor! Igor!" the mad scientist says.

"Yes, Doctor!" the hunchbacked assistant replies.

"We need a heart, a spleen, and a liver, for tonight's sale!"

"Yes, Dr. Minyard!"

All of us here at TPM initially thought this was too good to be true. But Kevin Allman from The Gambit assured us that it is in fact running on local television, and that he himself saw it just last night during a commercial break in the mayoral debate.

omg 

That's amazing.

[Van Cruncheon]

The Damage Percentage Numerical Representation explodes in a flash of napalm and stardust: what was once 300% is now 400%. Holy fuck, dude! You just gained a whole hundred percents in like a microsecond! That’s, like, a whole one full thing of something!

was pretty damn funny and accurate. i'd complain about the review length, but i've evolved the ability to "read" tim rogers reviews. it's like some internet version of stockholm syndrome where i just magically excise all the tortured metaphors and inane anecdotes to winnow all the amusing observations like the above

[BlueTsunami]

That is the first Tim Rogers review I've read and freaked out when I casually glanced at how small the umm, scroll bar was. I thought it must be an assload of comments attached to this review and my eyes boggled as I scrolled and scrolled. Its amazingly funny so far though which got me about halfway through it!

And I agree about hit points and various stat numbers being absolutely meaningless (or upgrades being "drop in the buckets" in the grand total amount of said stats). I would definitely appreciate going back to Dragon Warrior/Dragon Quest (earlier iterations) where getting a new sword meant killing a formerly tough enemy or getting a shiny new piece of armor meant withstanding new said enemies attacks..

[The Fake Shemp]

[youtube=560,345]oRgCOXaiDjQ[/youtube]

Check out this astonishing political ad in the upcoming New Orleans elections. The ad from Dwight McKenna, a candidate for Orleans Parish Coroner, attacks the incumbent coroner, Frank Minyard, as a Dr. Frankenstein who sells body parts -- complete with an assistant Igor, from out of the old Universal Studios movies!

"Igor! Igor!" the mad scientist says.

"Yes, Doctor!" the hunchbacked assistant replies.

"We need a heart, a spleen, and a liver, for tonight's sale!"

"Yes, Dr. Minyard!"

All of us here at TPM initially thought this was too good to be true. But Kevin Allman from The Gambit assured us that it is in fact running on local television, and that he himself saw it just last night during a commercial break in the mayoral debate.

omg 

DWIGHT MCKENNA: FUCK YEAH

[Powerslave]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=19551588&postcount=175

lol at this guy's username

[drew]

tl;dr

i did read it and between the color contrast and the caps cruise control i wont be able to see correctly for the next 5 minutes

[Raban]

was pretty damn funny and accurate. i'd complain about the review length, but i've evolved the ability to "read" tim rogers reviews. it's like some internet version of stockholm syndrome where i just magically excise all the tortured metaphors and inane anecdotes to winnow all the amusing observations like the above

That is the first Tim Rogers review I've read and freaked out when I casually glanced at how small the umm, scroll bar was. I thought it must be an assload of comments attached to this review and my eyes boggled as I scrolled and scrolled. Its amazingly funny so far though which got me about halfway through it!

And I agree about hit points and various stat numbers being absolutely meaningless (or upgrades being "drop in the buckets" in the grand total amount of said stats). I would definitely appreciate going back to Dragon Warrior/Dragon Quest (earlier iterations) where getting a new sword meant killing a formerly tough enemy or getting a shiny new piece of armor meant withstanding new said enemies attacks..

From the beginning I've always loved Tim Rogers. I really wish reviews of everything, from tech to movies, to video games were done by Tim. As crazy as he sometimes is, and as flat-out wrong as some of the reviews can be (Braid GOTY wtf), his writing style is excellent. It's a more wordy evolution convolution of Old Man Murray.

[Howard Alan Treesong]

you did NOT just compare Tim Rogers to OMM

[Raban]

you did NOT just compare Tim Rogers to OMM

Hey, I'm not saying it's even remotely better. Wolpaw and co. are some of the best writers out there, period. Ever. Tim Rogers is a far cry from that, even admitting that Eric is like his sworn enemy. I'm just saying the writing style, the way he picks apart games and goes on wondrous tangents about things barely related to the topic at hand, it's a similar style of game review.

But no, I completely agree with you, OMM > AB.NET like a thousand times over. It's too bad they don't still do reviews.

[Phoenix Dark]

Obama interview/play-by-play during Duke v Georgetown game 
[youtube=560,345]BaBn3cVmQo0[/youtube]

[Raban]

Obama interview/play-by-play during Duke v Georgetown game 
[youtube=560,345]BaBn3cVmQo0[/youtube]

 

[Van Cruncheon]

his writing style isn't excellent. it's grating, self-indulgent, redundant, and spends way too much time trying to point out its own cleverness. on the other hand, he *is* good at analyzing rpgs and pointing out all the ways they fuck themselves.

[ToxicAdam]

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1928033

Twister parody commercial

[Raban]

his writing style isn't excellent. it's grating, self-indulgent, redundant, and spends way too much time trying to point out its own cleverness. on the other hand, he *is* good at analyzing rpgs and pointing out all the ways they fuck themselves.

I know objectively it isn't very good. But I enjoy it very much. Maybe that Rogers stockholm syndrome got to me early on, but I find his writing very pleasing to read.

[etiolate]

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1928033

Twister parody commercial

Disclaimer does not apply to EB

[Bebpo]

I <3 Tim Roger's writing style.  It's not succinct at all, but it's very entertaining, funny, and he usual has good points.  Also I tend to feel his game taste is spot on for most j-games.

[drew]

tim rogers is a pretentious douche

[Flannel Boy]

I agree with Prole: Tim Roger's writing style is terrible. It's turgid and bordering on incoherent.

[The Fake Shemp]

Rogers' writing style is abysmal, and he suffers from the one thing that all of us did at one point when writing for the Internets (Prole included) - trying to force big words for the sake of stroking the ego (and the thesaurus). Most people grow out of it, though.

If your audience can't comprehend what you're typing, what's the fucking point?

[Flannel Boy]

Rogers' writing style is abysmal, and he suffers from the one thing that all of us did at one point when writing for the Internets (Prole included) - trying to force big words for the sake of stroking the ego (and the thesaurus).

I give Prole's style vociferous laudations.

[Van Cruncheon]

guilty as charged BUT there's also nothing wrong with assuming a modicum of intelligence in your audience (or forcing one on them)

time rogers' stream-of-consciousness gibbering features painfully didactic syntax and structure, though, which just tires any sane individual out

[The Fake Shemp]

I love you Prole, but really? Most of the Internet generation is content to type in pubescent girl shorthand and spend the majority of their time playing Farmville on Facebook. Nowadays, I try not to use words that have more than three syllables as a result.

Here is an excerpt from my latest masterpiece:

BYRON:
y halo thar young grl

[The Fake Shemp]

No, you just don't understand, Jinfash! You'll never understand! /pounds chest with fists

[Van Cruncheon]

I love you Prole, but really? Most of the Internet generation is content to type in pubescent girl shorthand and spend the majority of their time playing Farmville on Facebook. Nowadays, I try not to use words that have more than three syllables as a result.

Here is an excerpt from my latest masterpiece:

BYRON:
y halo thar young grl

fail. "young" is redundant, nobody talks to internet girls over the advertised age of 20

[The Fake Shemp]

Beaten yet again by the master.

[The Fake Shemp]

I don't think I hate anything more than Final Fantasy. Not even the Holocaust or Avatar. The day Square-Enix stops making Final Fantasy games is the day I become so over-excited that I let demi pummel my asshole.

Because the worst part about Final Fantasy - unlike the Holocaust or Avatar - is that it will never end. There will always been another one, with the same demographic of intense geeks "frothing" for more. And it will be met with the same mixed reviews and complaints, with everyone always comparing it to the cartridge or PSX classics, but they'll take for all its faults because it satisfies some weird, carnal desire for "serios animu".

My disdain for the series is only rivaled by Triumph's hate for comic book movies.

[Great Rumbler]

Oh, now I remember why Tim Rogers sounds familiar to me. He's the guy that wrote about playing Animal Crossing for eight days.

[Kestastrophe]

I don't think I hate anything more than Final Fantasy. Not even the Holocaust or Avatar. The day Square-Enix stops making Final Fantasy games is the day I become so over-excited that I let demi pummel my asshole.

bookmarked

[Raban]

I don't think I hate anything more than Final Fantasy. Not even the Holocaust or Avatar. The day Square-Enix stops making Final Fantasy games is the day I become so over-excited that I let demi pummel my asshole.

Because the worst part about Final Fantasy - unlike the Holocaust or Avatar - is that it will never end. There will always been another one, with the same demographic of intense geeks "frothing" for more. And it will be met with the same mixed reviews and complaints, with everyone always comparing it to the cartridge or PSX classics, but they'll take for all its faults because it satisfies some weird, carnal desire for "serios animu".

My disdain for the series is only rivaled by Triumph's hate for comic book movies.

I completely agree with you on this end.

And for the record, I'm making it very clear that I'm aware that Tim Rogers' writing is horrid, but I enjoy it on a personal level.

[demi]

What do you think about the pummeling your asshole part?

[Van Cruncheon]

if demi gets to pummel willco's asshole i honestly demand pics

[Raban]

What do you think about the pummeling your asshole part?

Sure, but by the time Final Fantasy stops getting made I'll hopefully be less than 200lbs. I don't even think you'd want to.

[Eel O'Brian]

didn't tim rogers once write an ode to pocky

[Diunx]

I don't think I hate anything more than Final Fantasy. Not even the Holocaust or Avatar. The day Square-Enix stops making Final Fantasy games is the day I become so over-excited that I let demi pummel my asshole.

Because the worst part about Final Fantasy - unlike the Holocaust or Avatar - is that it will never end. There will always been another one, with the same demographic of intense geeks "frothing" for more. And it will be met with the same mixed reviews and complaints, with everyone always comparing it to the cartridge or PSX classics, but they'll take for all its faults because it satisfies some weird, carnal desire for "serios animu".

My disdain for the series is only rivaled by Triumph's hate for comic book movies.

But FF6 and 12 are awesome!