Yes bécane! - The Other Bore Biker Daddies (Tour de France, brehs)

[Kara]

Today I got into my first road wreck (no one worry my mom, dad, only sibling, long-term partner, clients and tell them about it, I'm OK aside from some cuts and a jammed finger) and when I got home the first thing I did wasn't tend to myself, but to sit down and tweak some shit on my bike that had been bothering me the whole ride. It was about then that I figured I had the bug.

So without further ado...



-What are you riding? What are you buying?

-Give a fuck about professional doping cycling?

-Anything else I missed.

[Kara]

Currently riding: an Orbea Carpe. I bought it to just use as a commuter bike, but I actually prefer riding it for fun and riding hard at that, neither of which the bike is terribly designed for.

Planning to get: a slightly out of date lower end Orbea Orca (the B M50). In the long run I'm probably better off getting a disc break Avant, but the Avant comes off as so . That and I think I can grow farther as a rider on something like an Orca over an Avant. (I'm really not buying another bike for a long time after I get this one. Famous last words. )

Racing, well haven't followed a live event yet, but I am planning to pop in at a stage of this year's Tour of California. (I have to be in Santa Barbara in May anyway. ) Get to see Team United UnitedHealthcare on their sexy Wilier Triestinas if I can block off some time.

[Van Cruncheon]

sorry, breh. i'd love to support you in this, but i need proper motor oil and, of course, leather.

this effete spandex biz is too aia homo for me. :pd

 i need more of that fierce truckstop papa grizzly, big bore, long stroke, rock hard iron action

[Kara]

sorry, breh. i'd love to support you in this, but i need proper motor oil and, of course, leather.

this effete spandex biz is too aia homo for me. :pd

 i need more of that fierce truckstop papa grizzly, big bore, long stroke, rock hard iron action

Breh the feel of one of the most efficient forms of transportation and you yourself being the power plant.

Those are just the Tour de Fabulous wannabes. Mountain bikers are obnoxious as fuck hypermasculine dudebros.

Then there's the eurotrash urban commuters that wear suits and shit thus having to shit up their rides with fenders.

I'm a tweener. Got some bright, tight clothes as well as some dapper urban threads.

[Kara]

I was gonna build a bike but I think I'm too lazy.

It's hard as fuck to find a sporty bicycle with no gears.

They're overpriced but they exist.

http://www.orbea.com/us-en/bicycles/carpe-60/

http://www.pinarello.com/en/bike2014/fixie/catena

http://m.feltbicycles.com/productcatalog/series/1/82482

http://www.scott-sports.com/global/en/products/238409007/SCOTT-OTG-10-Bike/

All track bikes are single gear as well, iirc, but that's probably overkill.

[Kara]

I'm ngl, I'd wear a suit if I rode to work on Colnago's urban bike.

I'll also probs wear one when I ride to a cafe in Trieste on a Wilier Triestina to read Joyce and lust after younger women.

[Kara]

If it's a shitty bike I'd do it myself. Orbea has lifetime warranties but you can nullify it if so I'll let someone else work on those for me.

[Kara]

So one of the prestige races is going on atm (the Tour of Catalonia) and there was no live coverage worldwide today because of "technical difficulties." In Catalonia.

Apparently the UCI sucks or something? I only know that they make the East German Olympic Committee look like the U.S. Anti-doping Agency.

[Madrun Badrun]

Put some peanut butter on your finger.

[Van Cruncheon]

using your own body to power something is pure proletarian mudperson.  slumming as a mudperson is a grotesque parody of liberal pathos.

squandering the earth's precious resources to inefficiently move a frivolous vehicle, on the other hand? that is the privilege of those of means, my friend.  :lenowned

now, the REAL height of the elitist condition is a palanquin, moved entirely by the flesh of lessers. ah, when the day comes when we can compare how many strong indentured bearers power our opulent mobile litters. the only stat that matters when one is at the very apex of his condition is the integer value of souls in his immediate and non-negotiable employ... 

[Madrun Badrun]

As fancy as your words are, its hard to sell yourself as elite when we know you own a scooter.  Scooters are for poor teenagers and middle eastern herders than need to bring their goat to the market. 

[Van Cruncheon]

gwyneth paltrow rocks a fuckin' vespa gts300. don't you cluck about elitism to the founder of goop.com, you unpleasant little truffle-rooter. a vespa 946 costs more than you made in the last three years of your life.

[Kara]

Years ago I recognized my kinship with all living beings, and I made up my mind that I was not one bit better than the meanest on earth. I said then, and I say now, that while there is a lower class, I am in it, and while there is a criminal element I am of it, and while there is a soul in prison, I am not free.

[Van Cruncheon]

no jesuit you, you servile of the oligarchs!

[Madrun Badrun]

1) Defending yourself with gwyneth paltrow's taste is asking for trouble

2) Cost doesn't mean its high class

3) I hope I get the chance, sometime in my life, to make a fat person cry by calling them a 'unpleasant little truffle-rooter'.

4)  I'm a grad student.  A hamburger costs more than I've made in the last three years of my life.

[Van Cruncheon]

[Kara]

no jesuit you, you servile of the oligarchs!

If I want to fill my empty (metaphoric) soul with life in service to the only god we trust (money), that's between me and the tears I cry alone in the dark.

[Madrun Badrun]

(Image removed from quote.)

I honestly can't tell if you posted a scooter rider or someone you think might look like me. 

[Van Cruncheon]

i posted a man who knows the worth of his talent.

[Madrun Badrun]

He knows his books suck too?

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TBH I've only ever seen the TV show and kind of liked it because of the BDSM overtones.

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[Madrun Badrun]

My favourite scene was in S02E01 where some hot brunette in bondage leather gear is doing up the corset of a hot blond in bondage leather gear and she's all like 'Is there anything else ...I can do for you' IMPLYING SEX. 

[Kara]

There's a century ride this fall I want to kick my ass into shape to ride and if that happens + I get a suitable ride by then, I'm going to pretend like I'm being sponsored by The Borecast / Cruncheon.

e: My ride will likely have bright pink paint on it. http://i.imgur.com/Z7SnI06.jpg

[Kara]

Carbon bikes are usually race-derived so their frame geometry is about what works there and not not so much aesthetics. Time trial bikes are rolling dweebmobiles (that fly).

The great thing about steel frames is that as long as you don't let them rust they're indestructible. Aluminum frames average something like 3 years before degrading and while carbon is theoretically going to outlive you, it can crack in a crash and become unusable.

Agree about single gear styling.

[Kara]

Rose sells cheaper bikes on average if you're willing to RTFM and do a lot of the building yourself. I think their low end frames are aluminum alloy (i.e. steel-like). Plus you're in Yurop so you don't have to put up with 350€ shipping like we do here.

If the low sprocket on this beauty's cassette was higher than 25 I'd be all over it. It's like the Ural of velos.

http://www.bianchiusa.com/bikes/road/all-road/campione/

If it was celeste instead of black this wouldn't matter, natch.

[Kara]

Got a bunch of cash and I was like, "Time to get that Orca now. "

Going to need to set myself goals or something or else I'm going to end up with a 5 thousand dollar bike before I know it.

[king of the internet]

I've been riding again now that the snow has melted, still without functional brakes since last fall. It's kind of thrilling actually. You really gotta commit to crossing intersections. Fuck you death, I'm not afraid. 

[Kara]

I've been riding again now that the snow has melted, still without functional brakes since last fall. It's kind of thrilling actually. You really gotta commit to crossing intersections. Fuck you death, I'm not afraid. 

Night riding is great for this. Running stop signs like they're not there.

BTW, now that you're here I think we have a real solid "other two wheel Bore" thing. Two wheel Bore has families and partners; the other two wheel Bore has malcontentedness and death wishes.

[Kara]

Went out for a "quick" ride tonight and ended up breaking my single ride distance record.

I also broke my average km/h and top speed (without downhill) records too.

Gonna destroy that century this fall.

[Kara]

DUFUS OMG I FOUND A EURO RETAILER THAT SHIPS THIS TO THE STATES

http://www.wilier.com/en/products/int/road/strada?origin=us

I CAN HAVE A WILIER AND A HIPSTER BIKE AND SOMETHING TO GRIND OUT LONG DISTANCE RIDES

105 / Tiagra hybrid parts too.

E: "Cycling is about suffering."  (Jacques Boyer) Finally I found the right pastime for me.

[Rufus]

So much for cameraderie, eh?

[Rufus]

^_^

[Am_I_Anonymous]

Got some preview pics of vularai's new peddle powered whip





 

[bork]

Would imagine it to be more like this.

[Kara]

Got some preview pics of vularai's new peddle powered whip

(Image removed from quote.)



 

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pink_jersey

[Kara]

Ran a stop sign on my ride tonight (which isn't unusual), but unlike what usually happens (nothing), la policía came barreling through the intersection at virtually the same time thanks to the disparity in our respective rates of travel and I almost got pulped by The Man, who then drove erratically after getting caught with their hand in the cookie jar.

Vélo.

[Kara]

This guy is my hero. http://sheldonbrown.com/eagle.html

Why am I trying to get into men's cycling again? www.cyclingweekly.co.uk/news/latest-news/dani-king-bounces-back-164563

Audrey Cordon-Ragot. http://wigglehonda.com/audrey-cordon-ragot-fra/

[Kara]

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1934030988/ ?

From what I gather there's a certain amount of proprietary manufacturing in big brand stuff so that probably makes it difficult to produce a book like that. Also (at least here), manufacturers try not to piss off local bike shops / dealers so there's a lack of incentive to teach people how to cut those businesses out of the equation.

Unrelated: Sucks that this won't ship to the U.S. http://www.merlincycles.com/felt-f95-road-bike-2014-72321.html

e: Real talk: the commune was out of town for the holiday and I did some wrenching around on my bike in the living room and it rode so well afterwards.

[Kara]

You're not supposed to use platform pedals if you're a "serious" cyclist but there isn't one type of "serious" pedal (there isn't even one type of clipless pedal) so they just don't give you any pedal. Cycling, truly the nickel and diming hobby.

I know Specialized ships their bikes with shitty platform pedals even though the store pics all show them not having pedals. I can't imagine that's a unique thing.

[Kara]

After waaaay too much research I think I'm going to get a BH Zaphire.

Year or two old ones are very reasonable, they come with Tiagra drivetrains, and have carbon forks.

Plus they're Basque. :euskadi:

It kind of sucks that the entry level road bike is more and more an entry gran fondo bike. If I wanted to be comfortable I'd drive a car.

Now to find some cleats...

[Kara]

Aaaaand bought.

http://www.pricepoint.com/Brand/BH/BH-Zaphire-Tiagra-Road-Bike-Blue.axd

Hundred dollars off until tomorrow, couldn't say no.

Now to figure out where to put it.

They had Shimano shoes on clearance for 40 too. For once it pays to have XBOX HUEG feet.

Too bad they're only Shimano pedal compatible.

[king of the internet]

A quality bike is definitely one of the first investments I'll make if / when I ever get my shit together. Well, I want a quality bike but also a junker on the side. There's a certain something about having a junker you can use and abuse without a care. Beat it up, toss it on the ground, run that shit raw.

[Kara]

Aside from maybe the drop handlebars that seems like exactly what you were looking for, D. 

Bike Radar liked it too. http://www.bikeradar.com/us/road/gear/category/bikes/road/product/review-kona-paddy-wagon-14-48839/

Allez, allez!

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Riding the Tour de France on a single gear bike (like it says in that review). :mjlol:

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[Kara]

A quality bike is definitely one of the first investments I'll make if / when I ever get my shit together. Well, I want a quality bike but also a junker on the side. There's a certain something about having a junker you can use and abuse without a care. Beat it up, toss it on the ground, run that shit raw.

Because of the stupid pun I used for the thread title I want to buy a Motobécane from Bikes Direct and just fucking abuse the shit out of it. Maybe use their touring bike in my first few audax rides. :mjlol:

[Kara]

My BH arrived.

Holy FUCK 23mm tires are terrifying.  And they're more or less slicks too.

I think I'm going to remove the platform pedals from my single gear bike and put them on my new one until I learn how to handle losing 10mm or so of tire width and the traction of pitted tires.

As an added benefit it'll let me learn how to use clipless pedals on a much more forgiving frame with one gear and one I'm used to riding already.

[Kara]

I think 18-20mm is the width for tarmac racing at the professional level.  :'(

That Kona you were looking at had tires ~30mm.

[Kara]

Wind resistance is so #struggle.

The helmet I wear on the street (it weighs more and has more coverage than my other helmet) has a dweeby sun visor and I removed it before a night ride once. Oh boy. Above 12 kilometers per hour it was like pedaling through sludge. (Without the visor the helmet isn't aerodynamic at all.)

Oddly birettas don't feel the same way. Guess smooth surface + visor cuts through wind alright.

[Kara]

Yeah, after practicing with them tonight I'm going to admit that clipless pedals are utterly terrifying.

I say this as someone who skied a zillion years ago too.

This is going to be a nonstop adrenaline rush.

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I kinda want to start skiing again now.

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[Kara]

They seem like a good fit with single gear, especially when your RPM gets really high.

Unrelated: metal as heck http://www.bikeradar.com/us/mtb/gear/article/absa-cape-epic-a-bike-burial-ground-44005/

[Kara]

Hit 45 kilometers per hour on my ride today.

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It was fucking terrifying.

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[Kara]

It was my first ride with these BTW. I'm never going back to padded gloves again unless they're a fashion statement.

http://www.giro.com/us_en/zero-ii.html

Plus they come in my colors. (Black and white.)

[Kara]

Watching Paris-Roubaix in stunning HD® on my DVR and dis shit metal as fuck.

Speaking of racing, I realized I can ride the road course from the 1984 Olympics without much inconvenience because it was run around here instead of LA. Too bad it has a descent that's utterly terrifying without factoring in spaced out drivers in SUVs and teensy tiny bike lanes. (Ironically Mission Viejo has always had narrow bike lanes despite renaming a street in honor of the Olympic bike race it hosted.)

[Kara]

RIP rim brakes.

http://www.uci.ch/pressreleases/the-uci-and-wfsgi-study-the-introduction-disc-brakes-professional-road-cycling/

A future with cheap disc brake bikes.

[Kara]

Performance single chain?

http://www.bikeradar.com/us/road/gear/article/sram-brings-1x-to-the-road-with-new-force-1-and-rival-1-groupsets-43808/

BTW the end of Paris-Roubaix is awesome. 7 rider finish in a velodrome.

[Kara]

Got in my first duel today.

TFW you're pedaling until your legs fall off on a single speed and your rival just shifts into a higher gear and blows you away.

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Sadly I don't think my bete noire was using the SRAM Rival groupset.

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On a related note, if/when I go to my first race I'm definitely going to get punched the fuck out. I don't understand how velo makes me even more of a douchebag than ma voiture, but it does.

[Kara]

Sooooooooo my next project is going to be a bad life decision.

I'm going to convert my single speed. Taking off the flat bars and adding a drop bar, plus swapping out the stock drivetrain for a SRAM Rival groupset (without the brakes) provided that's not impossible, which I don't think it will be since the top end model in this line by Orbea has a 10 speed, single chain Shimano groupset and every model uses the exact same frame. (Orbea is big on modular design, another model they produce called the Avant can be equipped with pretty much anything--mechanical or electronic transmission, rim or disk brakes, et cetera.)

Single speed is really nice and the no muss, no fuss is great but... it's just not a good fit for my riding needs at the moment. The frame I'm using is heavy as fuck (it weighs about the same as 2 pro race bikes combined) and that makes any varied terrain riding more of bother than it should be. Plus, I GottaGoFast and this single speed is freewheel, not fixie, so I top out a lot sooner than I would like to--not that 40 something km/h isn't fast.

I can't even use it for what I originally bought it for (riding to the cafe), honestly. There are no bike lanes on the route from the commune to the cafe, the road traffic between here and there is moderately fast (55-60 km/h), and the drivers here don't know how to handle bicycles on the road (i.e. riding slow is a death wish). Not only will the project let me meet my riding needs, but I'll be able to wear my swank riding jacket to the cafe for a legitimate reason after it too.

Luckily for me the geometry of the frame is actually rather road race bike, so this isn't a complete exercise in lunacy. It'll also give me something to ride in an audax someday.

[Kara]

Yeeeeeeah... building a road bike was a little too much for me to handle. Took it into the shop to have them finish it up (and undo what I fucked up ).

On the plus side, I won't die on my first ride. (Or is that a downside? )

Road bikes have fucking weird weight distribution. The imbalance the cassette and rear derailleur cause really throw you off; tbh I understand why weight is such a big fucking deal in groupsets in a way I couldn't before.

Also a carbon fork paired with an aluminum frame is fucking black magic.

[Kara]

The holy grail y'all.



Belgian frame.

Italian groupset.

French clipless pedals.

German tires.

[Kara]

Strava says I hit 65 kilometers an hour on my ride tonight.

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I'm really going to become roadkill.

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[Kara]

Riding on skinny af tires isn't actually that scary. Don't get me wrong, they're intimidating the first few rides but then you adapt. What really sucks about a road bike are the drop handlebars. I'm still uncomfortable when I ride my BH because of those. TBH, I now understand why fondo frames are all the rage these days.

Also, having more than one gear is really bad for a speed junkie like me. I absolutely cannot pace myself. :'(

[Purrp Skirrp]

Going to incorporate bike riding into my weight loss regimen.

Miss the days I could ride around on a Mongoose pegging bros left and right.

Feeling too flabby for a serious man's bike, but I have one and the need for speed lies dormant in my special fellow genes (pops use to ride 30+ miles just to see my mom).

I have a nice old man's bike (inherited from passed elder gpa), where if you pedal fast enough you can power the headlight!

Contrast that with my best bud who has multiple long boards and can dance on em doin' tricks and skip hops with that Go-Pro fuck state mentality