Whatever fuck you Atra.
None of you understand how frustrating it is. I can't help that my brain tries to think "logically". It tries to use "evidence" to support it's usually negative impressions. Thanks to the bore and events last year I gained a new perspective. I saw myself becoming another incel fuck and I did'nt want that. I knew that's not something I wanted to be and I needed to become comfortable with myself. The bore's advice was "hey you have to love yourself first" and honestly I did take strides to become a more positive person. And I know it was felt on here and in real life. But every time I think it's cool to dop back into dating I just feel like it tells me all my negative feelings and impulses are right and when I try to argue with members of the bore or friends I'm told I'm wrong, only for my own experince to back it up.
Yes Atra you can say it's not my pictures, it's my attitude. But how? Women on tinder don't know my attitude! They don't know my personality. They don't know anything except my pictures. And I'm sorry I don't match with the kind of girls you match with. That is a fact and I'm tired of you telling me my experince is wrong. I match mostly with women that I'm sure are perfectly ok, but I don't find them attractive and it only reinfornces yes my narative that I can't get what I'm looking for. Maybe I need to change what I'm looking for? Maybe, but it's impossible to put that in a nicer wording that dosen't sound like "yeah you need to settle for something you don't like". And I know you may find this hard to belive, but I find a great deal of women attractive. As I've gotten older there's more 8s in the world, but I just can't seem to get them.
But that's just on tinder, which is why I dropped it.
In real life I'm aware that the women I'd be open to, do notice me. But I just don't know how to make that transition.
But I was told to retry tinder. I didn't want to. I got matched with the usual types, but some ok ones.
I went on a date with one. I thought it went very well. I tried not to be too hyped for it, but I thought wow my changes and improvements are making a change.
And then for whatever reason it blew up in my face.
I realize my reaction to this is ridiculous and I should just brush it off and try again.
But I am easily discouraged.
And it keeps happening to me. I meet a nice girl and and do try. And not try like I talk to her forever and then wait to finally ask them out. I've taken the advice given here and try and pull the trigger as quick as possible and it just keeps failling.
And I get so disappointed and hesitant of wanting to try again.
When the most recent girl said that nothing was going to happen. My initial response was "ok". I mean whatever there's not much I can do and I mean my life goes on.
But then I thought more and more about how man it really sucks how I just can't get it despite putting my best foot forward and I'm just like this really sucks. And you can't help but feel like something is less about you. Espically since it's been going on forever and everyone else seems to have an easier time.
I'm not a bad person and yes I'll be fine without sex and women and whatever. It's not going to kill me, but Jesus chirst am I just out here confused and frustrated.
And sometimes I don't take kindly to some of the things you have to say because you think I'm just whinning. Like I don't want to be an asshat on here(ok sometimes I do), but I'm just so frustrated. I don't want to be a pos incel. I want to be successful with at least one woman. Like I just want want everyone wants and it seems so unattainable that I just get mad.
