Avatar: Willco still hates it

[bork]

It was a fun action flick, but that's all it was. I have no desire to ever see it again.

Yeah, pretty much.  All the characters were pretty one-dimensional, and the story was insanely predictable-- BLUE NATIVE PEOPLE GOOD, WHITE MAN FROM URTH BAD (but a select few whites and all other races-- good too!).  Still 100 times better than Wolverine, Bayformers 2, G.I. Joe, and Ninja Assassin, however.  I didn't feel ripped off after watching it. 

Rewatchable?  Maybe a few times.  Not in theaters though.  With the previews included, we were at the theater for THREE HOURS.  That's more than enough.

Speaking of previews, what the fuck was that Salt movie and Gladiator 2 We mean Robin Hood?

Scully wakes up after mating with a giant blue cat: "What the hell am I doing?!" Audience explodes with laughter.  This was the highlight of the film.  As for the rest, see Distantmantra's post.  

   When this movie hits home (or a good cam emerges), someone needs to make "Avatar in 10 seconds," showing a few scenes of Sully learning about being a blue cat-dude and then some action, ending with him waking up and saying "What the hell am I doing?!"  Cue "AVATAR" title and credits.

[Howard Alan Treesong]

I had a dream I saw Avatar last night. It was incredibly stupid and I hated it. As I left the theater, I thought, "wait...there wasn't a huge battle at the end!" I immediately knew that I was dreaming and was mad at my subconcious for wasting my time with an inaccurate version of the movie.

[Phoenix Dark]

hmmmm
http://www.deadline.com/hollywood/first-look-alvin-2-beats-avatar/

[Solo]

hmmmm
http://www.deadline.com/hollywood/first-look-alvin-2-beats-avatar/

Avatar is going to be #1 this weekend and have only a 9% drop from its opening weekend.

[CajoleJuice]

Avatar has the legs of its blue furry love interest.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

[close]

[Diunx]

hmmmm
http://www.deadline.com/hollywood/first-look-alvin-2-beats-avatar/

Fucking incredible

[recursivelyenumerable]

Within 30 years science will allow us to have IRL blue furry avatars, so Cameron is just giving us a glimpse of the future.

[Great Rumbler]

This year's Christmas day was huge for movies. 3 of the top 4 highest grossing movies on Christmas day came out this year.

[Barry Egan]

If it weren't for my post in this thread I would have never remembered having even seen this movie. 

[fistfulofmetal]

the final tally for tonight's showing is 5: Brother, his wife, my dad, friend of mine, and me.



I've paid for all the tickets 

[The Fake Shemp]

I am going to take all six members of my family to see Sherlock Holmes to counter fistfulofmetal.

[fistfulofmetal]

ah but you're not paying premium for the 3D showing. So in the end, Cameron still wins.

[The Fake Shemp]

How does Cameron win from me taking family members to another movie?

[Donono]

He gets the pleasure of coming to your house to call you an asshole and to get out of his personal space.

[Veidt]

This thread just keeps getting funnier by the post.

[Third]

Saw the movie in 3D tonight. Pretty good, but way too predictable. The special effects were awesome, though.

[Great Rumbler]

Willco might not have wanted to get into specifics regarding Avatar's box office run, but that didn't stop PD. His domestic prediction was $160 million [which Avatar passed yesterday] and $300 million worldwide [which Avatar passed a couple of days ago].

[brawndolicious]

He was right about Spiderman 3 and Tranformers 2 cleaning up though.  Just because a movie sells tickets doesn't mean it's not shit.

[Great Rumbler]

He was right about Spiderman 3 and Tranformers 2 cleaning up though.  Just because a movie sells tickets doesn't mean it's not shit.

Uh...I think pretty much everyone knew that those were going to clean up. They were both huge sequels to movies that grossed a ton of cash.

[brawndolicious]

And they were shit.

[Great Rumbler]

And they were shit.

I don't think you'll find many people that will argue otherwise.

[brawndolicious]

That you can sell tickets to a shitty movie pretty easily.  Apparently uncanny valley furries were an uncharted territory that Willco never considered which is understandable since comic book movies and robot combat are safe bets.

[Great Rumbler]

Except with Avatar, most people agree that it's actually pretty good.

[brawndolicious]

And it's pretty universally agreed that the story is balls.  A story that is balls for three hours usually means the movie won't have legs.  This also has furry-bait so that's probably the only real draw for it.

[Diunx]

And it's pretty universally agreed that the story is balls.  A story that is balls for three hours usually means the movie won't have legs.  This also has furry-bait so that's probably the only real draw for it.

Its already showing legs, do you really think that is going to go from #1-#2 on its second week to #9 or something?

[Great Rumbler]

And it's pretty universally agreed that the story is balls.  A story that is balls for three hours usually means the movie won't have legs.  This also has furry-bait so that's probably the only real draw for it.

When pretty much every review ends with "...but none of that matters! You absolutely MUST see this in theaters!" that should send up a few red flags that maybe this is actually going to make some money after all.

[Eric P]

I am going to take all six members of my family to see Sherlock Holmes to counter fistfulofmetal.

man, sherlock holmes is really enjoyable

[bork]

I'm not getting the furry stuff.  The aliens have tails, but nothing struck me as "furry."  The characters just act like tribal-native types and they don't have fur on their bodies.

[Great Rumbler]

I'm not getting the furry stuff.  The aliens have tails, but nothing struck me as "furry."  The characters just act like tribal-native types and they don't have fur on their bodies.

There's nothing to "get". It's just another talking point for people that decided it was going to suck and be a financial disaster after the first teaser trailer came out.

[Van Cruncheon]

"furry" = a sexual attraction to anthropomorphic nonhuman types

[The Fake Shemp]

Return of the King cleaned up, and that wasn't shit. What's your point, am nintenho?

Return of the King was pretty crappy. Maybe the worst of the Rings flicks.

[Mr. Gundam]

Return of the King cleaned up, and that wasn't shit. What's your point, am nintenho?

Return of the King was pretty crappy. Maybe the worst of the Rings flicks.

Agreed. Fellowship was the only good film of the trilogy.

[Diunx]

They are all meh, but my favorite is ROTK.

[TakingBackSunday]

Return of the King isn't crappy–none of the LotR movies are.  It was just not nearly as great as Fellowship was.  Fellowship is one of the best movies of the decade...Return of the King is just a pretty great adventure movie.

[The Fake Shemp]

Return of the King is pretty crappy. It is way too long, the editing is a mess, some of the effects are ugly, the writing sucks in places (I don't care how faithful it was to a novel, this is a film) and it has like fifty different endings. Pass.

Fellowship is a legitimately good movie, though. That should have won the Oscar. Return of the King should have been retitled Return of the Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[Akala]

ROTK would have been awesome if it covered the scouring of the shire. could have been epic.  :'(

[The Fake Shemp]

Yeah, some of the omissions and some of the inclusions are baffling. But - hey! - that's Peter Jackson for you.

Even if that was included, Akala, it'd still need a lot of work. Return of the King was good for one thing, and that was completely burning me out on the entire series. I don't think I've seen the films since I left the theaters and took a piss that was as epic as anything Tolkien could ever imagine.

And I adored Fellowship, and I really dug The Two Towers. In fact, The Two Towers has kind of a special place in my heart, because it's the only film Disposable White Guy and I still reference with any sort of regularity.

But Jinfash hit the nail on the head with something that really stands out - the performances. I know the kids really liked Legolas and Gimli hamming it up, but I felt like it hit a fever pitch of ridiculousness with Return of the King. Still, the worst offender is just that it is too fucking long. And then Peter Jackson stretches it out even longer with all these fucking slow-motion shots and fifty endings and - holy shit! - I'm falling asleep just talking about it.

[Great Rumbler]

ROTK would have been awesome if it covered the scouring of the shire. could have been epic.  :'(

It also would have added at least another hour, if not more, to a movie that runs over fours hours long.

And all of the LotR movies are good.

[The Fake Shemp]

All of them are good.*

spoiler (click to show/hide)

*Except the last one.

[close]

[Great Rumbler]

All of them are good.*

spoiler (click to show/hide)

*Except the last one.

[close]

All of them are good, including the last one. I'd even agree that RotK is the weakest though, despite quite a few very good scenes.

Nothing can top the first two, though. Solid gold, they are.

[The Fake Shemp]

Return of the King is the cinematic equivalent of chamomile tea.

[Great Rumbler]

Return of the King is the cinematic equivalent of chamomile tea.

And yet I've watched it all the way through on several occasions, enjoying it each time.

[The Fake Shemp]

Hey, there's nothing wrong with being a masochist. This is America, you can do whatever you want to yourself.

[Akala]

I've actually never seen ROTK again all the way through outside of theaters. I have the extended cut...but I just can't finish it in a sitting.

I don't hate the movie or anything, but I think my initial dissapointment in the flick maybe forever ruined it for me.

[Great Rumbler]

Hey, there's nothing wrong with being a masochist. This is America, you can do whatever you want to yourself.

That doesn't make any sense, given your previous analogy.

[fistfulofmetal]

Man. RealD is so much better than my IMAX 3D. it's mind blowing the difference. the depth added to all the scenes was completely absent in the IMAX 3D showing.

All 4 people I brought with me really loved the movie. this'll be my final theater showing until a rip is released then the 3D Bluray (which i'll be upgrading my TV for)

after this I don't want to watch any more movies that arent in REALD

[brawndolicious]

I'm not getting the furry stuff.  The aliens have tails, but nothing struck me as "furry."  The characters just act like tribal-native types and they don't have fur on their bodies.

A "furry" is somebody who enjoys animal features on a humanoid body, which would include the Navi obviously.  The reason it applies to this film is how the main character gradually sheds his humanity which literally climaxes with him fucking an alien.  That's all really kind of sad.  With the horrible story and cheesy Navi culture and all the reviewers orgasming over the blue bitch supposedly being sexy...

And it's pretty universally agreed that the story is balls.  A story that is balls for three hours usually means the movie won't have legs.  This also has furry-bait so that's probably the only real draw for it.

When pretty much every review ends with "...but none of that matters! You absolutely MUST see this in theaters!" that should send up a few red flags that maybe this is actually going to make some money after all.

It's more realistic to assume that the average viewer just looked at the review score and the names on the poster and ignored all of the text.

[Phoenix Dark]

Sounds like Avatar is the biggest, most successful, overrated phenomena in entertainment since the Wii

[Eric P]

rotk is crap
two towers is crap

fellowship is the only one i can still watch

[Solo]

Starting to look like the movie INCREASED this weekend. Where am your gods now?

Avatar: Titanic 2: Furry Bugaloo

[Solo]

It's already at $416 million worldwide.

Willcowned.

Thats before the weekend, FYI.

[Great Rumbler]

$75 million for the weekend, beating out all newcomers to the box office. That's a drop of 2.6% from last weekend and puts it at a close second behind Dark Knight for top second weekend ever.

With the foreign gross from Thursday-Sunday, it should jump up to $600-$650 million.

[fistfulofmetal]

I don't see how people can claim it has a bad story. It's got a simple story that's well told. The only thing that I can point at and say "that could be better" is the few awkward dialogue choices.

[Great Rumbler]

I don't see how people can claim it has a bad story. It's got a simple story that's well told. The only thing that I can point at and say "that could be better" is the few awkward dialogue choices.

Much like a lot of things in this thread, hyperbole has stretched reality in both directions.

[Purple Filth]

I don't see how people can claim it has a bad story. It's got a simple story that's well told. The only thing that I can point at and say "that could be better" is the few awkward dialogue choices.

Much like a lot of things in this thread, hyperbole has stretched reality in both directions.

Agreed but i think some of the hyperbole was aimed at fucking with Green Shinobi since he was taking this shit too fucking seriously 

[fistfulofmetal]

After what this Avatar situation has turned out to be, I think it's pretty clear it will change the way movies are made. 3D is a big reason it's making such bank and I expect to see a time in the near future where at least 70% of all movies released will have 3D options.

[Phoenix Dark]

rotk is crap
two towers is crap

fellowship is the only one i can still watch

All three are great. I can understand someone not liking the editing and pacing (ie ent scenes) in TTT/ROTK, but both are at least good movies.

[Great Rumbler]

$615 million worldwide through 10 days.

Also of note, Sherlock Holmes shattered the record for Christmas opening and this weekend is the highest grossing weekend in America.

[recursivelyenumerable]

So what does the apparent success of Avatar mean for the future of typography?  Will Papyrus become even more prevalent?

[The Fake Shemp]

Agreed but i think some of the hyperbole was aimed at fucking with Green Shinobi since he was taking this shit too fucking seriously 

Almost all of that came from Willco. And to be honest, I doubt I would have taken it so seriously at all if he hadn't tried to discredit my taste in movies/music and say that I'm not capable of making good judgments regarding films because I happened to like one that he's never even seen, but wants to see fail for whatever strange reason.

... but you're not, as evident by:

- Peter Jackson's King Kong.
- You think Avatar should be nominated for Best Picture after everyone laughed you off the forum.

P.S. I never wished for it to fail, considering I have acquaintances that worked on it. The difference between thinking a Best Picture nomination is stupid and the budget was ridiculous and actively rooting for it fail (see: Patel) is in your mind, because you're a dummy.