TL;DR possibly got cock blocked by an Uber driver on a night when I wasn't even planning to go out.
Long version:
End of day yesterday one of my coworkers (a dude who is always kind of jokey and I havent talked to a lot so far since I started) asks "hey what are you doing tonight, you look pretty tired, probably just gonna go home and sleep, right?". I respond that yes, I'm probably going to go home and drink myself to sleep (not entirely serious) but I had heard him talking to another programmer sounding like he needed someone to help him out, so I ask him about it. Apparently some girl he's been seeing briefly wanted to go out dancing, and she's bringing a bunch of her friends so he needs some wingmen (and I guess he doesn't know anyone? I dunno). After making sure I wasn't going to be asked to drive to the God Damn Valley (almost all my coworkers live in one of the Valleys and I ain't about to drive up the 405 twice in one day), I agree to show up. The place in question is a bar/club in Silverlake called the Satellite, I figure worst case it won't be expensive and there will be cute girls dancing there.
So I go home, change, and head over to the bar. I beat my coworkers (oh right another dude from work also came along, an enthusiastic Filipino dude with a love of bad American pop music). So I settle in at the bar in the back and enjoy a beer and some free pizza, and about 20 minutes later they finally show up. The good news was that the girl's friends were all pleasant enough to look at, and after a couple of minutes of conversation it turned out that they were at least not totally awful to talk to. One of them was a hot personal trainer, one of them was the main girl's aggressive younger sister, and the last one was a lesbian.
Now I'm going to be honest, the music at this place was not really my shit and I was admittedly tired and not sufficiently drunk to really get into it at first, so once they went to the dance floor I peaced out back to the bar twice to drink alone, eventually switching to whiskey because I realized that I was going to have to dance some and beer wasn't working fast enough. I danced, I got sweaty, I had as much fun as a nerdy, tired, white, 30 something who is totally out of his element could probably have.
Finally the night ends and we go outside, at this point the girls find out I drove myself and they become concerned that I shouldn't be driving (I had never really gotten drunk, hadn't had anything in at least 2 hours and had probably sweated everything out with all the dancing) and started making jumbled plans first to go get tacos and then instead to go back to someones house and have pizza. Honestly I wasn't paying much attention because I figured I was about to go home and go to bed and I was okay with that. Anywho, my coworker goes and gets his car from the valet and my other coworker gets in with him and the girls do not get in. Now I'm standing here with these girls I barely know, as they order an uber. Personally when I go out with friends who are female, I always stick around long enough to make sure they get in an uber or a taxi or whatever of their own choosing and not someone elses, because I feel like that's a polite fucking thing to do (and Ive had female friends tell me stories about being left curbside by dudes and shit getting scary and that's lame).
Digression aside, we help the hot trainer chick ward off some weirdo, walk over to 7-11 to wait for the Uber, the girls get in and I start saying good bye and then they go "wait, you're not getting in?". My idiot mouth says, "well I gotta go home and let my dog out." And one of the girls goes, "are you gonna choose your dog over a car full of girls?". So of course I say no and start getting in, and then the Uber driver chimes in "This car only seats 5 and there's a police car right there and he's gonna pull me over if I let you in!" Protests are made to no avail, the girls say I should just follow and then say they'll text me the address. I give the younger sister my number (I think I gave it to her correctly) and she says she gonna call me, but alas she does not. I go home, let my dog out and go the fuck to bed finally.
Weird fucking night.