Pallando will return in "Never Say Never Again"

[Rufus]

Getting or giving rimjobs? If a girl did it to me, I'd imagine it would feel like licking a cat.

I'm not sure I understand how the cat factors into any of this. You met any women with suspiciously raspy tongues or have you licked cat-ass before?

[FatalT]

Getting or giving rimjobs? If a girl did it to me, I'd imagine it would feel like licking a cat.

I'm not sure I understand how the cat factors into any of this. You met any women with suspiciously raspy tongues or have you licked cat-ass before?

Laughing my ass off so hard right now at this fucking post.

[brawndolicious]

Getting or giving rimjobs? If a girl did it to me, I'd imagine it would feel like licking a cat.

I'm not sure I understand how the cat factors into any of this. You met any women with suspiciously raspy tongues or have you licked cat-ass before?

If you've ever seen a cat's butthole and my butthole I think you'd understand. Let's just say you don't need to understand.

[Mupepe]

It's in my Hispanic blood. Right, Mupepe?

Mupepe would tell you rimjobs are in your Hispanic blood.

I would agree.

yep yep. Hispanics are nasty. Rawr

[Robo]

It's so great when relationships end without a touch of bitterness.  I actually feel happier right this very moment than I have at any time in the past two months.

[BobFromPikeCreek]

Bet you anything she's crying and watching The Notebook.

[brawndolicious]

It's so great when relationships end without a touch of bitterness.  I actually feel happier right this very moment than I have at any time in the past two months.

The relationship was only for two months?

[brawndolicious]

This girl in my lab seems to be possibly into me and she likes my shittastic humor that you guys have 6 years of experience with but I'm worried since this is the first time I know I'll be spending at least a year with somebody.

Shit I have no idea what I'm doing. This is the whole reason I tried out the online series of cock out date sites. This is like an adult problem. All I know is I can't beat around any bush but I'm not exactly sure how close I'm beating to the bush.

[Mupepe]

what the hell are you talking about?  beating around what bush?  This is what they call overthinking it.  It seems like you're worried about how you'll come off over the next year.  If that's the case, who cares?  It's you.  If she likes you, great!  If she doesn't, oh well.  Learn from the experience and move on to another girl.

[Verdigris Murder]

I guess this is as good a place as any to start: my gf seems to have developed bdd it started off with just her being slightly coy about getting undressed in front of me and it's now actually affecting our sex life. Due to the way she only wants to have sex in darkness.

Tbh, before she got this thing I only thought fat people had it, but as she's a fairly normal sized lady, my beliefs were challenged.
Anyway, there's a sub reddit called gone wild, it's dedicated to girls on the plump side showing off their asses and beasts to be voted on by strangers for validation. She's actually pretty slim, so her pics are actually going down quite well ie. guys are masturbating over them, and giving her pics points.
I'm going to wait until her birthday, and then show her all the adulation she's been receiving!

My engagement to her will follow.

[Verdigris Murder]

I her defence, my plan of swapping meat based foods I cook for her with soy substitutes didnt really pan out as she noticed pretty quickly.

[lordmaji]

I'm just a jerk from time to time. I don't mean to be, a lot of it has to do with overworking, then after work everyone have a million other things for me to do and I don't really get any down time to myself. If I'm not at work, I have band stuff I have to do (finishing the album) if not that, it's classes, if not that someone is wanting us to drive hours to visit them.

All of this is causing me to stress out and get super edgy and snappy at Nisha (and others) but I got really shitty with her last night and didn't have any reason to really. I try to maintain and greenery helps, but it only helps so much.

Solution,
I need a vacation.
/lj
 

[Flannel Boy]

I was asked to go an another coffee date this Saturday with yet another masters student finishing of her thesis. :/

[brawndolicious]

None of that sounds bad playboy.

[Cerveza mas fina]

I was asked to go an another coffee date this Saturday with yet another masters student finishing of her thesis. :/

Tell her you're polish and buy this t-shirt.

[Flannel Boy]

I was asked to go an another coffee date this Saturday with yet another masters student finishing of her thesis. :/

Make her feel that spark.

I would but Boogie refused to lend me his taser.

I was asked to go an another coffee date this Saturday with yet another masters student finishing of her thesis. :/

Tell her you're polish and buy this t-shirt.

(Image removed from quote.)

I do not buy T-shirts containing false statements. Only you can rock that shirt.

[tiesto]

Some cute girl smiled at me during Carl Cox's set at EDC, then after I smiled back and she asked me my age. I said 30 and then she walked away, I was probably too old for her.

I went out with this one girl who was really heavy the other day (like, too much for even me) who txts me all the time. Need to bring her down gently, I hate when I have to do that.

Just crossing my fingers that my new job has some cute girls working there. Since I'm in a huuuuuge slump.

[Flannel Boy]

I have a second date tomorrow and a potential date with an Asian MILF. Thankfully, didn't have to do any of the asking.

[Boogie]

I would but Boogie refused to lend me his taser.

Me?  Carry a taser?  Fuck that shit.

[Phoenix Dark]

I'm imagining Awesom-O sipping coffee while reading excerpts to the girl as she twirls her hair and checks her iPhone

[FatalT]

My relationship life has been shit. In the past two weeks I've been used like a piece of meat. I had a two-night stand and a one-night stand . Some of you may appreciate this but it's not what I want. Screw you guys and your OKCupid dates.

[Flannel Boy]

Leper FatalT.

[Flannel Boy]

I have a date with another woman, who's a radio reporter.

I almost feel like Tiesto. Where's my techno?

[Rufus]

Techno Viking sued the person that filmed him:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2013/jan/24/techno-viking-internet-celebrity-curse

[Flannel Boy]

Techno Viking sued the person that filmed him:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2013/jan/24/techno-viking-internet-celebrity-curse

To date, Walker has collected 54 million video views on her YouTube channel, which at an average payout rate of $2 per 1,000 views comes out to $108,037 in ad revenue from Google alone.

[Flannel Boy]

 



 

[Verdigris Murder]

Single guys: is dating still lots of fun?

It sounds like an utter grind from this thread. Is LAN single? Her posts remind me of a sassy Whitney Houston but without the drugs or coffin lol.

LAN hasn't posted for a while though....

[Phoenix Dark]

I doubt she's coming back.

[Flannel Boy]

I doubt she's coming back.

Devo = Lianna
Lan = the dog

[Robo]

I imagine that's a pretty typical online dating experience.

[CajoleJuice]

My roommate has been doing a massive amount of online dating and it just sounds brutal.

[tiesto]

I have a date with another woman, who's a radio reporter.

I almost feel like Tiesto. Where's my techno?

I'm a house fan not techno though

I went on a date today with a girl, she was cute (black hair with bangs, had a bit of a "rugby player" esque build but still attractive)... but seemed like she was about ready to fall asleep on our date, she was really tired, and pretty shy on top of that (didn't even make eye contact)... like, I thought I was shy but was trying to do most of the talking At least I had some fucking incredible beer while at the bar.

Meeting this one girl tomorrow for sushi in Smithtown. She is a web designer, and is really cute... glasses, long brown hair, chubby, really cute face. Doesn't like edm though

[Groogrux]

So I've been talking to the same girl for over a month now, and things are going really well.  However, another woman, who is a family friend, has been texting me for the past couple of weeks.  Her husband died about a month ago and she's been really lonely ever since.  We started talking as friends because we could relate on that issue. 

Now, she's sending me texts pretty much saying that she's DTF.  I'm not interested in a relationship with her at all, but sex always sounds nice, especially for a guy like me who never gets any.  If I stay with the girl I've been talking to, that part of the relationship probably won't happen for a really long time. 

Eck!  Fuck a girl and potentially lose the relationship with the other, or don't fuck a girl and potentially get into a relationship where I get long-term sex down the road...

[Phoenix Dark]

She's DTF, oblige her ass. You're not in a relationship right now, you're just talking to some girl. If things don't pan out with the first  girl, the DTF girl will continue to be there assuming you're decent in bed.

[Flannel Boy]

Looks like last night's date is going to be a no go. I texted her around 2:30 pm saying that yesterday was fun, and we should get together again. No reply. I get the picture, and I certainly won't debase myself by sending a follow up text like I might have done ten years ago,

I commend you.

My roommate has been doing a massive amount of online dating and it just sounds brutal.

You seem to do well with online dating, but maybe that's because you bypass the dating sites.

[Verdigris Murder]

What is a family friend?

[Verdigris Murder]

Sounds sketchy.

[TakingBackSunday]

I have a date with a really awesome gal tomorrow.  I've been meeting a bunch of new people lately since getting out of school -- professional life is awesome.  Met her at pint night, hit it off immediately.  She was a film major but she now works as a designer at the Country Music Association.  Has great taste in music despite working there.  Knows a shit load about sports, which is great.  Very freewheeling and down to earth.  Very excited for it tomorrow.

[chronovore]

I wasn't planning to drink tonight, but I think I'm gonna have to. Fuck dating.

Try to avoid self-medication.

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

I hit it off with a nursing student who is my type who lives in my apartment complex.  Seems kind of lazy to go for women where I live but who cares.

[Phoenix Dark]

Just don't shit where you eat breh, and you'll be fine.

[Flannel Boy]

The radio reporter's sexy radio voice can get even sexier!  I felt like I should be getting charged $3.99 per minute.

[tiesto]

Awesome date tonite, we went for sushi and then to a bar (Croxleys in Smithtown for Cajole). Apart from not being into EDM the girl is fucking awesome. She's really pretty (brown hair, glasses, light complexion, curvy), we got along real well, and it ended with a makeout 

Also checked in a few good beers and unlocked a few badges in Untappd 

[Groogrux]

What is a family friend?

Not my friend, a friend of someone else in my family.

[tiesto]

Just called the girl, she seemed very happy I called and thanked me for calling and said she had a great time. She wants to go out Wednesday, no plans set in stone (she was shopping in the mall when I called her) but since she mentioned she enjoyed watching figure skating - I'm gonna ask her to go ice skating with me.

[Groogrux]

Just called the girl, she seemed very happy I called and thanked me for calling and said she had a great time. She wants to go out Wednesday, no plans set in stone (she was shopping in the mall when I called her) but since she mentioned she enjoyed watching figure skating - I'm gonna ask her to go ice skating with me.

 

So, this girl I've been talking to and I are officially a couple now.

She's coming over tonight for dinner and a movie.

[Flannel Boy]

I'm going to have to stop going on coffee dates.

95% sure the news reporter didn't feel a spark. And I never got to ask her whether her workplace is like NewsRadio.

[CajoleJuice]

Need to go on dates that involve alcohol.

[Flannel Boy]

Yes. At the very least, I shouldn't take them on a date where they're consuming beverages that increase their focus and alertness.

It's pretty discouraging as all three women contacted me and all seemed more interested in me than I was of them.

[FatalT]

Had what I was promised won't just be a one night stand but we'll see. We're supposed to hang out again tomorrow after I get off work and all of Monday after I'm off. I really like this one and she said she was interested in an actual relationship so we'll see.

[Polari]

I'm going to have to stop going on coffee dates.

95% sure the news reporter didn't feel a spark. And I never got to ask her whether her workplace is like NewsRadio.

Coffee dates sound like the most pointless thing ever. Nothing good ever happens during the daytime.

[Flannel Boy]

I'm going to have to stop going on coffee dates.

95% sure the news reporter didn't feel a spark. And I never got to ask her whether her workplace is like NewsRadio.

Coffee dates sound like the most pointless thing ever. Nothing good ever happens during the daytime.

They're the ones asking me out/making the dates. Speaking of which, I have a date tomorrow in the afternoon with a MILF. Four dates in a week--I hope hedging my bets works better for me than it did for Antonius (skip to 2:48):


"I'm sorry; I just didn't feel that spark." #things no woman has ever said to Patrik Antonius.

[tiesto]

Nice to hear you have been getting a string of dates, Malek. Hope it works out for you...

[Flannel Boy]

". . . but I know it won't."

[tiesto]

Some Belarussian model is emailing me now on OKC. Obviously hunting for a green card but damn she is hot

[Rufus]

". . . but I know it won't."

Damp wood don't burn, mang.

[Phoenix Dark]

Some Belarussian model is emailing me now on OKC. Obviously hunting for a green card but damn she is hot

whoa whoa wut

[bud]

eb, would you fuck a fat girl?

[Groogrux]

Had a date with the girlfriend tonight.  Reached Arvie levels of awkward. 

Awkward hand holding.
Awkward holding each other.
Awkward "is it a kiss or a hug?...
....
....
....
....
....
....it's a hug..." moment

 

[Flannel Boy]

Fuck everything.

.