THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: GilloD on September 13, 2007, 06:15:20 PM

Title: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: GilloD on September 13, 2007, 06:15:20 PM: My retardo landlord decided to try and DIY public utilities with a backhoe. He told us the electricity was going to be off, but only for half an hour. It took 8 hours. However, he fucked up the water main and now I have no water. I can't pee, poop,cook, clean or drink anything. I've called the town and the state and no one seems interested that distinguished mentally-challenged fucking Randy is digging up town pipes with a backhoe he borrowed from his Dad.

What the fuck? I'm so thirsty. I kept the recipets for the bags of ice I had to buy to keep my food from going bad, I hope he's ready to reimburse me for lunch, dinner and a gallon of water.

Keep in mind that when I moved in the AC was busted, there was no hot water and no gas FOR A WEEK. God fuck!
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: FlameOfCallandor on September 13, 2007, 06:41:07 PM: Call the cops and tell them that you saw some suspicious looking people diggin up the water main. That will get them there in a hurry.
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: Van Cruncheon on September 13, 2007, 06:47:32 PM: actually, foc's plan isn't half bad. dial the county and tell them that a water main burst in your complex and you don't know why.
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: Madrun Badrun on September 13, 2007, 06:53:36 PM: Quote from: FlameOfCallandor on September 13, 2007, 06:41:07 PM
Call the cops and tell them that you saw some suspicious looking people diggin up the water main. That will get them there in a hurry.

Also be sure to use the word terrorist and maybe "anthrax in the water" at least once to really get attention.
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: FlameOfCallandor on September 13, 2007, 06:54:31 PM: When I first typed it I typed terrorist, but you dont want them to say that you were intentionally misleading. Imply terrorist without saying it.
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: demi on September 13, 2007, 06:55:20 PM: Blame it on the hot fatty.
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: bagofeyes on September 13, 2007, 08:46:57 PM: I blame one of your fat intruders
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: Ichirou on September 13, 2007, 09:24:55 PM: Tell the cops your annoying female houseguest did it.
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: xnikki118x on September 15, 2007, 04:09:34 AM: I believe there are laws against renting a place without running water. It has to be some kind of health code violation. Definitely call the cops.
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: Phoenix Dark on September 15, 2007, 04:15:24 AM: It's a trap. Get an axe
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: Madrun Badrun on September 15, 2007, 04:25:37 AM: Poop on the carpet!
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: brawndolicious on September 15, 2007, 06:16:29 AM: call the city but change you're wording a little. say that you feel the building (especially around the sinks) shaking which is scaring the shit out of you and that your landlord has no license for plumbing but has been trying to fix it for a long time. If water pipes are shaking (which they can if the plumber doesn't know what he's doing) they'll send somebody. I don't know if this is the type of thing they send a single guy over the next day to check or if they call the fire department for this so use it as a last resort.
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: BlueTsunami on September 15, 2007, 02:46:54 PM: Tell the cops your spending a weekend at Bernie's
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: xnikki118x on September 16, 2007, 03:55:22 AM: Do you have water and/or electricity yet? I humbly request an update.
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: GilloD on September 16, 2007, 12:25:34 PM: Yeah. We only went without for like 12 hours. But that's still a long time without notice.
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: Scurvy Stan on September 16, 2007, 04:59:29 PM: Pretend to be your landlord and call the utilities company and have them shut off his service.
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: Mupepe on September 17, 2007, 02:26:14 PM: my apartment complex left the hot water off in my building for 3 days. they kept telling us it was going to be fixed. when i finally called (again) on the third day, the lady was like "they said it was fixed last night!"

they knocked 90 bucks off my rent. sweet tits.
Title: Re: There is no water or electricity in my apartment
Post by: ToxicAdam on September 17, 2007, 02:47:25 PM: Go buy a water cooler-sized jug of water, so at least you can take a shit in the toilet. Use the water to flush the toilet.