THE BORE

General => Video Game Bored => Topic started by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:17:17 PM

Title: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:17:17 PM
bill: "i'm too old for this shit, nate"

nate: "you weren't too old for that waitress in rio de janeiro!"

bill: "i just can't keep up"

nate: "you sure could keep it up for that bartender in asuncion!"

bill: "this old ticker's gonna fail"

nate: "but the ol' dicker sure worked like a charm with that table dancer in the seychelles!"

bill: "<groan>"

nate: "i bet you made that stripper back in jamaica groan like that, too!"

bill: "fuck you, nate, you stupid shit"

nate: "i bet you fucked that porn star in brasilia in her stupid shit!"

bill: "i swear to god you jugheaded fuck if you do not shut the fuck up so help me god i will cut your ass off"

nate: "i bet that sweet little aerobics instructor back in belize swore to god too when you. uh. helped her. uh, uhh. fucked her. uh. ass off."

bill: <draws gun>

bill: <shoots nate dead>

all: <applause>
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: demi on November 18, 2007, 11:18:00 PM
?
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Himu on November 18, 2007, 11:18:27 PM
:lol :lol
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:18:55 PM
play the first 30 minutes of uncharted, and learn why amy hennig doesn't have a hollywood scriptwriting career
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Himu on November 18, 2007, 11:19:45 PM
Is Bill the cheeseburger looking "chick"?
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: demi on November 18, 2007, 11:20:08 PM
Ah ok, maybe there is a video on youtube or something.
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: TVC15 on November 18, 2007, 11:20:54 PM
Yeah, I think I know a little too much about Amy's preferences now.  She likes it CALIGULA style.
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:20:58 PM
no, bill is the old sidekick guy. elena is the victor-victoria thing.
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Smooth Groove on November 18, 2007, 11:21:10 PM
The chick has a really annoying voice.  Drake's not much better.  
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: TVC15 on November 18, 2007, 11:22:30 PM
Yeah, the old model for the chick was worse, but the one that made it in the game is still pretty ugly.  I find it odd that such an ugly women with such terrible voice acting made it into a game in which a woman had a prominent role. She must hate other women, women that aren't herself.  I bet she wants all the pricks in the world to herself, in her ass, all at once, peeing the white pee.
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:22:56 PM
i like elena and nate's delivery fine -- in fact, it's some of the best videogame va delivery i've heard. it's just a shame about the lines! well, and the weird-ass facial animation.
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:23:35 PM
OMG PEEING THE WHITE PEE!
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Smooth Groove on November 18, 2007, 11:24:30 PM
I'm not saying that the VA is bad technically but that chick's voice just grate on my nerves for some reason. 
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Himu on November 18, 2007, 11:25:04 PM
Yeah, the old model for the chick was worse, but the one that made it in the game is still pretty ugly.  I find it odd that such an ugly women with such terrible voice acting made it into a game in which a woman had a prominent role. She must hate other women, women that aren't herself.  I bet she wants all the pricks in the world to herself, in her ass, all at once, peeing the white pee.

There's a chick on campus who is by far the ugliest girl I've ever seen. She looks just like a guy and I fucking swear everyone gets her confused for a guy too.
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:25:41 PM
i like how ancient ruins have barrels of live VOLCANIC gunpowder still lying around, unrotted and conveniently placed next to tottering pillars
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Eel O'Brian on November 18, 2007, 11:27:24 PM
I don't think the voice acting is all that bad.  The dialogue started off okay, but got worse, then it gets a little better, then it gets worse, etc.  It's like a Richard Chamberlain DTV adventure film from the early 80s with a bigger budget.  

Yeah, that chick is ugly.  I wonder if the dark circles around her eyes are ever explained.

Sully sounds like John Vernon, but John Vernon is dead, so whoever voiced Sully is doing a pretty good John Vernon impression.
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Smooth Groove on November 18, 2007, 11:28:31 PM
The random barrels are just part of their stylistic design, Drinky, like the ugly girl and weird looking facial animations.  
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Eel O'Brian on November 18, 2007, 11:29:11 PM
There are random explosive barrels in even the best games, though (HL2).
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:31:52 PM
but do those barrels have identical pyroclastic eruptions when shot
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Eel O'Brian on November 18, 2007, 11:33:08 PM
it's the way it's packed
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:33:55 PM
i know so little about 16th century english explorers it seems :'(
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Eel O'Brian on November 18, 2007, 11:37:08 PM
They managed to cram a German U-Boat into the storyline, so I am now obligated to like it 20% more because of that
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:40:10 PM
oh, i like the game, but i do NOT see where gaf's paroxysms were coming from. it feels like a lightweight, adventure-y gears of war with a weirdly inconsistent rendering engine and quite possibly the worst script since, well, the last slovakian game not titled "the witcher" that i've played
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Eel O'Brian on November 18, 2007, 11:43:22 PM
Assassin's Creed would benefit from some of that dialogue:

Altair - "I've stabbed the target in the neck"

SciFi Doctor - "Oh, like the way you stabbed that 'virgin' chick back in Bethlehem"
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:45:12 PM
:lol
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: demi on November 18, 2007, 11:45:49 PM
oh, i like the game, but i do NOT see where gaf's paroxysms were coming from. it feels like a lightweight, adventure-y gears of war with a weirdly inconsistent rendering engine and quite possibly the worst script since, well, the last slovakian game not titled "the witcher" that i've played

Two Worlds :rock
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:46:22 PM
demi :rock
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: TVC15 on November 18, 2007, 11:47:03 PM
Demi liked Two Worlds so much that he played through it TWICE!  Once for each world!
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 18, 2007, 11:47:26 PM
once for each world
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: The Fake Shemp on November 18, 2007, 11:51:33 PM
each world once
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Smooth Groove on November 18, 2007, 11:54:18 PM
I must have a really dirty mind.  One for each hole popped in my head when I read Prole's post. 
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Oblivion on November 19, 2007, 12:49:14 AM
I thought this was  a dialogue between Bill Trinen and Nate whateverhisface is from NoA localization.

..and it probably would have been just as appropriate.
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Sho Nuff on November 19, 2007, 06:06:43 AM
play the first 30 minutes of uncharted, and learn why amy hennig doesn't have a hollywood scriptwriting career

The intro's expository dialogue is amongst the worst I've ever heard

I thought Amy was a fallen star from the TV/movie industry but a quick check on imdb certainly puts the kibosh on THAT theory  :-X
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Himu on December 29, 2008, 03:00:21 AM
so now that I'm playing this game, i have to agree with drinky. The amount of sexualized banter in this game is ridiculous.
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Tabasco on December 29, 2008, 05:25:01 AM
(http://i206.photobucket.com/albums/bb151/squick3n/Uncharted5.jpg)
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: dammitmattt on December 29, 2008, 08:13:08 AM
oh, i like the game, but i do NOT see where gaf's paroxysms were coming from. it feels like a lightweight, adventure-y gears of war with a weirdly inconsistent rendering engine and quite possibly the worst script since, well, the last slovakian game not titled "the witcher" that i've played

Because they have nothing else.
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Positive Touch on December 29, 2008, 08:19:57 AM
that's a nice-looking screenshot
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: AdmiralViscen on December 29, 2008, 10:41:24 AM
I lol'd
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Guybrush Threepwood on December 29, 2008, 10:55:31 AM
The problem with this game is that the shooting isn't realistic at all.

It doesn't take five direct hits in the chest with a pistol to kill someone. That shit would have been fine in Cartoon Land: Drake's Fortune but not in a "realistic" game.
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: cool breeze on December 29, 2008, 11:38:16 AM
pretty sure that this game isn't trying to be realistic
Title: Re: in this topic we write future nate drake/bill sully crappy-ass sex banter
Post by: Great Rumbler on December 29, 2008, 12:43:32 PM
oh, i like the game, but i do NOT see where gaf's paroxysms were coming from. it feels like a lightweight, adventure-y gears of war with a weirdly inconsistent rendering engine and quite possibly the worst script since, well, the last slovakian game not titled "the witcher" that i've played

Two Worlds :rock

Forsooth, nave!