THE BORE

General => Video Game Bored => Topic started by: Joe Molotov on December 15, 2007, 01:39:53 AM

Title: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Joe Molotov on December 15, 2007, 01:39:53 AM: Okay, so this game really sucks, but I can't stop playing it! It has crappy graphics, crappy story, crappy characters, crappy faux-Old English dialog (Yay verily forsooth my good bounty hunter. Wouldst thou dispatch the bandits camped outside our poor peasant village, mayhap?), crappy voice-acting, and crappy town and characters names like Fauepler of the Krager guild from the town of Glabatoria in the Kingdom of Valertar that are so distinguished mentally-challenged that make it impossible to comprehend anything that's going on even if I cared which I don't. The combat is okay and stacking armor/weapons is kinda cool at first, but there's really no reason for me to be playing it. Yet, here we are. I guess really what keeps me coming back is the squealing the pigs make when I slice them into bacon with my cleaver, which is inexplicably named "Run Dodo Run". It's probably the most satisfying sound effect ever recorded for a videogame. It sounds like the took an actual pig and then hooked it up to car battery while running it through a meat grinder. I also love how your douchebag "hero" smack talks the pigs when he mercilessly kills them. "Greet the gods!" Hell yeah, you tell those pig bitches!

So did anyone else play this turd?
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: demi on December 15, 2007, 01:43:00 AM: I AM THE GREATEST TWO WORLDS FAN EVER!!!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Joe Molotov on December 15, 2007, 01:53:44 AM: Is there an achievement for killing a ton of pigs?

spoiler (click to show/hide)
I'm playing the PC version. :(
[close]
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: demi on December 15, 2007, 01:55:48 AM: no!
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Joe Molotov on December 15, 2007, 01:57:37 AM: Makes sense, killing pigs is it's own reward.
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Van Cruncheon on December 15, 2007, 02:04:05 AM: SECOND GREATEST TWO WORLDS FAN HERE
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: MCD on December 15, 2007, 02:05:06 AM: I bet it's better than Uncharted!
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Van Cruncheon on December 15, 2007, 02:06:24 AM: it totally is
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: MCD on December 15, 2007, 02:07:59 AM: :bow :bow :bow Two Worlds :bow :bow :bow
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Mupepe on December 15, 2007, 02:48:25 AM: god i hope i'm just having problems seeing sarcasm today
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: hyp on December 15, 2007, 02:50:30 AM: seriously. is two worlds the ~~new~~ old hotness? i might have to peep the demo.
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: demi on December 15, 2007, 02:51:00 AM: yo lick its balls and check it out

vote on my video too
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: hyp on December 15, 2007, 02:53:47 AM: i already voted sucka
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: demi on December 15, 2007, 02:56:46 AM: cmon do it again then, i need 4 more and i get 1000/1000
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Mupepe on December 15, 2007, 03:34:50 AM: Quote from: hyp on December 15, 2007, 02:50:30 AM
seriously. is two worlds the ~~new~~ old hotness? i might have to peep the demo.
if the demo is anything to go by, the game sucks balls.

i haven't played the full version
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: abrader on December 15, 2007, 05:41:00 AM: Quote from: Mupepe on December 15, 2007, 03:34:50 AM
Quote from: hyp on December 15, 2007, 02:50:30 AM
seriously. is two worlds the ~~new~~ old hotness? i might have to peep the demo.
if the demo is anything to go by, the game sucks balls.

i haven't played the full version

ITs like the demo - except you paid for it - like i did :(
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Mupepe on December 15, 2007, 06:06:34 AM: Quote from: abrader on December 15, 2007, 05:41:00 AM
Quote from: Mupepe on December 15, 2007, 03:34:50 AM
Quote from: hyp on December 15, 2007, 02:50:30 AM
seriously. is two worlds the ~~new~~ old hotness? i might have to peep the demo.
if the demo is anything to go by, the game sucks balls.

i haven't played the full version

ITs like the demo - except you paid for it - like i did :(

:lol
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Joe Molotov on December 20, 2007, 03:18:14 AM: Oh hell yeah, I just skeleton horse! Oblivion = owned.

Is there anyway to get your horse back when you teleport? Like maybe a stable where you can get your horse back from? Because I will forgo teleporting for the whole game if that's the only way to keep Bone Horse (that's his name).
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: demi on December 20, 2007, 03:21:37 AM: just go to any Orc Camp, there's a bone horse usually there
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Joe Molotov on December 20, 2007, 04:09:51 AM: Quote from: demi on December 20, 2007, 03:21:37 AM
just go to any Orc Camp, there's a bone horse usually there

Cool. I've got the Orc Armor too so I can sneak into an Orc camp if I need to.
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: brawndolicious on December 20, 2007, 04:27:48 AM: is there like something I missed about the demo? the controls and especially the combat sucked. is the cheesy story or scenery interesting or some shit?
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: demi on December 20, 2007, 04:46:15 AM: Quote from: Joe Molotov on December 20, 2007, 04:09:51 AM
Quote from: demi on December 20, 2007, 03:21:37 AM
just go to any Orc Camp, there's a bone horse usually there

Cool. I've got the Orc Armor too so I can sneak into an Orc camp if I need to.

Save that for Gor Gammar
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Joe Molotov on December 21, 2007, 04:01:33 AM: Quote from: am nintenho on December 20, 2007, 04:27:48 AM
is there like something I missed about the demo? the controls and especially the combat sucked. is the cheesy story or scenery interesting or some shit?

I'm playing the PC version, supposedly the controls are a lot better. I'm not going to lie to you though, it's not a great game. But the scenery is kinda nice and I'm hooked on riding through the country-side on my horse and kicking bandit ass for loot. I think they knew the game wasn't that great so they just put awesome loot all over the place to reward people that did play it. It's like every chest I open has at least one really awesome piece of armor or sword, and every bandit camp has a few hundred gold pieces and some piece of awesome gear, and you can just keep upgrading your weapons and armor infinitely by finding gems or by finding more gear to stack. It's somewhat addictive. I killed this orc named Ugly today, and found a better sword, better armor, better pants, and a better helmet that I had before. Then I found Ho's House after that, I don't think I need to tell you what I found in there. :-*
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Hitler Stole My Potato on December 21, 2007, 09:30:34 AM: I just don't understand how you guys can play this. I'm usually more than capable of looking past technical and stylistic problems but holy crap Two Worlds is an absolute trainwreck. Everyone in the game looks like they have Downs Syndrome. The guy that modeled the characters is either 8 years old or is some sort of drunken distinguished mentally-challenged fellow that lives in a unibomber shack and hasn't seen another living person all of life. It's eye shattering ridiculous.
Title: Re: Two Worlds Apprecation Thread :bow
Post by: Joe Molotov on December 21, 2007, 09:32:19 PM: Quote from: Hitler Stole My Potato on December 21, 2007, 09:30:34 AM
I just don't understand how you guys can play this. I'm usually more than capable of looking past technical and stylistic problems but holy crap Two Worlds is an absolute trainwreck. Everyone in the game looks like they have Downs Syndrome. The guy that modeled the characters is either 8 years old or is some sort of drunken distinguished mentally-challenged fellow that lives in a unibomber shack and hasn't seen another living person all of life. It's eye shattering ridiculous.

Maybe everyone in the game DOES have Downs Syndrome. That's some cutting edge shit right there. Most developers wouldn't have the balls to try something like that, but those crazy Poles though, they're like "Alright, let's do this!" Could start a revolution in game development. I'm hoping that in GTA 5, the main character has Cerebral Palsy.