THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: Van Cruncheon on October 29, 2006, 07:14:23 PM

Title: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Van Cruncheon on October 29, 2006, 07:14:23 PM
First off, never fly with a two year old. Ever. And don't fly American -- I asked the stewardess for milk for my daughter and she said in this super snotty voice "we don't have milk for coach." WTF! Only first class folks get fucking MILK? Jesus, is the pilot fucking Doc and I'm back in the 1500s? Fuck you, American Airlines.

Anyway, we had two movies: The Break-Up and The Lake House, and I watched both without sound.


(http://ec1.images-amazon.com/images/P/B000HCPS94.01._SS500_SCLZZZZZZZ_V36923661_.jpg)
The Break-Up
I watched this coming in to Dallas. I was playing Guilty Gear Slash PSP while watching it because it seemed very stupid, like something The Dark Shake would watch sandwiched between episodes of Reba. The plot seems to be that Vince Vaughn is a dumb Polack, and he is dating that hag Jennifer Aniston. She has an annoying gay friend that the Polack punches because he is a LOL INSENSITIVE DUMB MOVIE MALE LOL and she decides to sell her half of their overpriced and overdecorated condo. They seem to argue a lot and then they break-up. The movie ends with them meeting on the street and the Polack winks at the WASP hag. This seems very New York and as a result very dumb, like Friends was. I give it two throw-up bags out of five.

(http://ec2.images-amazon.com/images/P/B000HEWEE4.01._SS500_SCLZZZZZZZ_V59768505_.jpg)
The Lake House
JESUS SMACK SANDWICH CHRIST WTF. This is a Magical Negro movie without the magical negro which made me mad because as a white person I love the safe, cracker-friendly comedic stylings of Wil Smith and Whoopie Goldberg. The magical negro is replaced with the combination of a lake house and a dog, which bring Sandra Bullock and Ted "Theodore" Logan together across space and time so they can smooch in front of a Vaseline-smeared lens. It fuckin' sucked. My daughter was kicking the seat in front of me the whole time, pissing off the acne-scarred Asian chick in front of her. The Asian chick was mad about the lack of magical negros as well I think, as well as her lack of driving ability, and she gave me lots of evil looks. Frankly, I preferred to stare at her unpleasantly spotty complexion, replete with its hostile stare, than watch Sandra and Keanu pine around like a bunch of fuckwits. They finally get together and I threw up a little. This is not a movie for men. It is a movie for ZomBz and the rest of #reba. (That's two Reba disses for the price of one, fegs.)

Anyway, planes suck. American now charges you FOUR FUCKIN' BUCKS for a snack in coach, and they hired some mean motherfuckers to fling small cups of diet soda at me. Fuck travel, fuck planes, and fuck you.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: CajoleJuice on October 29, 2006, 07:16:12 PM
 :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl

That Lake House review was one of the greatest things I've ever read, Drinky. Bravo.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: MrAngryFace on October 29, 2006, 07:17:07 PM
The Lake House dvd cover is funny cause of the quote/recommendation
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Cheebs on October 29, 2006, 07:20:19 PM
I saw the break up in theaters when it came out. And I enjoyed it.  :o
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Van Cruncheon on October 29, 2006, 07:20:54 PM
well, it WAS better than The Lake House, but WHY
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Bacon on October 29, 2006, 07:21:58 PM
I watched Click.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Van Cruncheon on October 29, 2006, 07:23:14 PM
also, is it wrong to ask for JUST ONE FORMULAIC HOLLYWOOD COMEDY where the dude is smart and has his act together and the chick is a dumb slob who sits around kvetching on the Internet? We could call it LOKI AND REDWOOD.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment on October 29, 2006, 07:23:58 PM
Quote
...like something The Dark Shake would watch sandwiched between episodes of Reba

 :-\
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Saint Cornelius on October 29, 2006, 07:26:22 PM
Why didn't you just play a handheld?
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Flannel Boy on October 29, 2006, 07:26:54 PM
also, is it wrong to ask for JUST ONE FORMULAIC HOLLYWOOD COMEDY where the dude is smart and has his act together and the chick is a dumb slob who sits around kvetching on the Internet? We could call it LOKI AND REDWOOD.
:lol :lol :lol
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: TVC15 on October 29, 2006, 07:27:04 PM
If the Dark Shake were a homo I'd fuck him in his dirty pooper.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: G The Resurrected on October 29, 2006, 07:27:23 PM
Yes Drinky i own the lake house its something i watch when i'm on my period.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Flannel Boy on October 29, 2006, 07:27:50 PM
If the Dark Shake were a homo I'd fuck him in his dirty pooper.
Why should that stop you?
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment on October 29, 2006, 07:28:11 PM
This thread owns me. :(
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: G The Resurrected on October 29, 2006, 07:29:52 PM
Just remember the dark shake is one of datelines nbc's baiters for to catch a predator.

Loki and Redwood  :lol :lol :lol :lol
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment on October 29, 2006, 07:32:08 PM
Just remember the dark shake is one of datelines nbc's baiters for to catch a predator.


:shh I'm *this* close to nabbing Drinky Crow.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Van Cruncheon on October 29, 2006, 07:33:09 PM
a/s/l :-*
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment on October 29, 2006, 07:34:01 PM
grimace grimace grimace
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: TVC15 on October 29, 2006, 07:57:45 PM
If Grimmace were a homo I'd fuck him in his dirty pooper.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Shuri on October 29, 2006, 09:32:56 PM
btw guys he has a daughter. Did he mention that his daughter was doing something zanny? Daughter DAUGHTER DAUGHTER!
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Saint Cornelius on October 29, 2006, 09:35:54 PM
Serious case of breeder envy? Seems so.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Van Cruncheon on October 29, 2006, 09:37:42 PM
oh please, shuri. this is no worse than one of you fegs squealing about what you drank last night. she's a major part of my life, for better or worse, and especially so when i'm on a fucking plane.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Shuri on October 29, 2006, 09:38:01 PM
You'd be a good breeder, Corni. that plump ass, those hips, those pouty lips.. oh yeah
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Saint Cornelius on October 29, 2006, 09:40:03 PM
Are you doubting my breeding capabilities, Shury?
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Van Cruncheon on October 29, 2006, 09:40:53 PM
nothing like taking flak for mating from the pimple-ridden japagaf set
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: MrAngryFace on October 29, 2006, 09:44:25 PM
Shuri:

Wtf, why the HELL does that even BOTHER you while we suffer "SHAKE FOR PREZ" and my "apple jacks" thread.

Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Shuri on October 29, 2006, 09:56:50 PM
nothing like taking flak for mating from the pimple-ridden japagaf set
Settle down. This wasnt a direct attack at you, or your daughter, your family, your dog, your way of live. Whatever. Considering I bought maybe 5 games in the past year, most westerner action shooter games; seen maybe 3 anime movies (ninja scroll, ghost int he shell, akira) in my entire life you really nailed me down with the whole lol internet pimple ridden animu otaku thing, mr 20+ posts a day. I couldnt care less about starting shit with random forum posters. Calm down.

It's embarassing, just drop it, walk away and resume the internet comedy act, please
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: MrAngryFace on October 29, 2006, 09:59:48 PM
Wtf is your deal Shuri, grow the fuck up. YOU came in HERE starting shit, then tell everyone to drop is cause WE'RE the embarassing ones.

If this wasnt Evilbore id ban you for a day you little crybaby.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Shuri on October 29, 2006, 10:09:20 PM
Lots of overactions in this thread.

Lots

Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: MrAngryFace on October 29, 2006, 10:14:19 PM
If youre gonna start shit:

A.) Finish it, dont tell people to grow up and retreat like a Diablos.

B.) Dont come in acting like a snot and expect people to take it lightly. We tolerate all sorts of stuff here, but being a stupid snot is not one of them.

C.) "Everyone is overreacting" is one of the oldest 'internet save face' tactics around, dont pretend.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Shuri on October 29, 2006, 10:17:57 PM
Where were you when a bunch of posters ganged up on a sick teenage girl in that 'lemur is a whore' thread? Well?

oh wait, you did post something..

Dont like it just dont reply, it'll drop like a rock.

What more can I say
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Vizzys on October 29, 2006, 10:33:38 PM
I concur about the breakup, stupid movie total. Also I saw poseidon, what a shitfest.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Van Cruncheon on October 29, 2006, 10:40:04 PM

Quote from: Shuri
btw guys he has a daughter. Did he mention that his daughter was doing something zanny? Daughter DAUGHTER DAUGHTER!
Quote from: Shuri
This wasnt a direct attack at you, or your daughter, your family, your dog, your way of live.

then what was it

you brought up my daughter specifically, dode, like it was important or something

don't play internet martyr because i brought nails
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: MrAngryFace on October 29, 2006, 10:40:51 PM
Shuri: As a moderator I cannot ignore someone who channels Diablos.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Mandark on October 29, 2006, 11:15:33 PM
btw guys he has a daughter. Did he mention that his daughter was doing something zanny? Daughter DAUGHTER DAUGHTER!

Says the guy who made a dozen threads about his girlfriend cheating on him.


Drinky: What about Bridget Jones's Diary?  Wasn't it partly meant to be a modernization of Pride and Prejudice, where Colin Firth's character is Darcy, and Renee Zelwegger is the World's Most Useless Elizabeth Bennet?

I think they make movies that way because audiences will root for the slobby guys (like on the Man Law commercials!), but a slobby chick is just a bad housekeeper.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Fishie on October 29, 2006, 11:27:40 PM
American Airlines is the worst of a bad bunch.
US Airlines have been crap for ages now, well at least United is ok and Delta seems to be improving a lot lately.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: demi on October 29, 2006, 11:32:09 PM
shuri you're so angry in this thread

do you want to have sex? or just lie together naked and cherish the finer things in life, whatever works.
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: Saint Cornelius on October 29, 2006, 11:34:51 PM
isn't shuri gay?
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: demi on October 29, 2006, 11:35:17 PM
i'd certainly hope so, would make things easier
Title: Re: AIRLINE MOVIE REVIEWS courtesy of DRINKY CROW
Post by: The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment on October 30, 2006, 07:59:47 AM
Shuri pulled a Diablos. :lol