THE BORE
General => Video Game Bored => Topic started by: FancyFeast on May 17, 2008, 05:53:04 PM
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http://digg.com/gaming_news/Videogame_analyst_Michael_Patcher_quits
!!Warning: Parody Article!!
Patcher pulls out of prediction game
May 16th, 2008 · 4 Comments
by Lono
(http://sarcasticgamer.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/1pachter.jpg)
Another month, another console war prediction from the Webush Morgan analysist Michael Patcher. Over the past year, Patcher has been giving his predictions on the Console War and gaining noteriety within the gaming community. For the last two months, Patcher has been beating the PS3 drum, extoling to anyone that will listen that the PS3 would beat the 360 in sales in March and April, especially in light of GTA IV’s release. He’s been wrong. In fact, before GTA’s release, he predicted that PS3 sales would cause over 2 million units sold against only 1 million due to GTA alone. Wrong again.
In fact, Patcher’s been so wrong lately that the Webush Morgan analyst announced yesterday in an interview with gamepolitics.com that he was getting out of the video game business and moving on to other things. Find out what, after the jump.
In his recent interview, Patcher was quoted as being, “tired of being wrong” and “tired of being shown up by no-nothing fanboys.” Yes, it seems that Patcher’s 20% success rate finally caught up with him.
What’s next? Well Patcher went on in the interview to make a number of bold predictions about the environment, the US economy, the Presidential Election and a number of controversial topics.
Patcher predicted:
* The sun will come out “tomorrow”
* A president will be “elected” in November
* Humans will continue to have opposable thumbs, for the “forseeable future”
* Gas will be “expensive”
* The Dark Knight Movie will be “awesome”
* He thinks apples are “good”
* The TV show Lost will air episodes for “only” two more seasons.
In one last video game prediction, Patcher estimated that Metal Gear Solid 4 will come out… sometime in June.
This guy sure knows his stuff. Maybe there’s a carnival around that is looking for another host of “Guess Your Weight.” He could probably do that? Right?
Maybe not.
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digg it bitches.
pour shame all over this turds filthy face. :-* :'(
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leper this filth.
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:zzz
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Who let this guy in
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:-\
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leper this filth.
Yes, please. The dude is far more annoying than calcifer ever was.
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I wouldn't go that far, but yea it's too much.
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at least calcifer was funny.
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(http://sarcasticgamer.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/1pachter.jpg)
goatse total