THE BORE
General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: Robo on May 21, 2008, 09:18:49 PM
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I've been looking to pick up a pair of glasses lately to mix up my face a bit and I found a pair of nice Ralph Lauren's that look great, but they're $200 for the frames alone. Expensive, but I want 'em. Looking for coupons, I see on Lenscrafters.com that some program called "AARP" allows members to get 30% off a set of prescription glasses. I jump on their website, glance over some information and that see a yearly subscription is only $12! Damn, I think, I'll save at least $150 with a 30% discount! So, I sign up -- it's quick and easy; name, address, phone number, some minor personal information (sex, age), my credit card information and that's that.
Today in Lenscrafters, I pick out the glasses and I present a print-out of my AARP account information (I didn't want to wait for them to send me a membership card) to receive my 30% discount. The woman ringing up the sale mentions to me that she's having difficulty finding my account. She appears to be very new, possibly even the first day on the job. I inform her that I just signed up last night and that my account may not yet be processed. After another 10 - 15 minutes of waiting, she finally says she found it and takes down my lens and frame order. Money exchange is done at a different location in the store and is handled by a more experienced employee. The man ringing me up notices my receipt and questions, "she gave you a AARP discount?"
"Yeah, I have an account."
"Aren't you a little young to be a AARP member?
I reach in my pocket for my print-out. "Errr... well, I--"
"Nevermind, I don't even want to see it."
*cha-ching* $170 discount and I'm on my way. This gets me thinking, I don't even know what the fuck the AARP is. I call my mother and she gives me the skinny. AARP stands for American Association of Retired Persons, a non-profit organization dedicated, at its most basic level, to assisting seniors with health care discounts and special member benefits. :duh
Am I abusing the system? Is this why the elderly can't have nice things? Is the AARP going to figure out eventually that I'm only 24 and have only had a real job for like 14 months in my entire life and make me pay the difference, or worse, send a bunch of dirty geriatrics to my house to kick my ass? They have my birthdate! It's part of the sign up process! It's possible that the sales person, in her frustration, chose a random AARP account to tie my order to, so it may not even be attached to me. Is Lenscrafters going to question me when I go in tomorrow to pick up my glasses? Whatever shall I do!?
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You didn't know what AARP stood for? :rofl
Actually, I have no idea how you were even ABLE to sign up!
Might as well just go with it! Feign ignorance!
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How would I know that? I'm not old!
That's what I'm wondering too. But it has my birth date right in the account information! And they don't even ask for employment records or anything!
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You could easily just try to do the same thing you just did today.
Only this time you would be lying. Are you a good liar?
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I'm less worried about Lenscrafters as I am about getting stomped by demented, legally-blind elderly folk.
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oh the indignity of being curb stomped by someone wearing prescription shoes
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this would make a good always sunny episode
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You can also use your membership for discounts at many of two-to-three star motels!
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So, I sign up -- it's quick and easy; name, address, phone number, some minor personal information (sex, age), my credit card information and that's that.
So you put in your real age, and it wasn't like "Heeyyyy, wait a second!"
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I can get a dollar off Walgreens Personal Lubricating Jelly with my AARP discount. :o
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You, my friend, are pimping the system. I applaud you!
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You seriously didn't know the AARP was.
And when going to their website, you did not notice all the pictures of old people or the articles about retirement and social security and being an old person.
...this seriously DOES sound like a sitcom. Now the rest of the day you're going to be afraid of old people, thinking that they're AARP agents, and then in a hilarious ending you end up crashing the events of that episode's second plot thread (which involves an old person).