THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: Bloodwake on June 17, 2008, 12:50:27 AM

Title: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Bloodwake on June 17, 2008, 12:50:27 AM
Okay.


It's better than The Village and Lady in the Water, but hell, let's not kid ourselves. That isn't too fucking hard to accomplish.

Right off the bat, I had problems with Mark Wahlberg. I also realized, right off the bad, that it isn't exactly that he can't act in this film. He definitely does an awesome job of acting like a fucking pussy, since that who his character is in the film. My problem is that he's too overwhelming, and he definitely clashes with the legitimately creepy suicide sequences that populate the film

Surprise acting performance of the film: John Leguizamo. No shit.


The only other problem the film truly has is that it needs to be maybe another half-hour longer. The movie went by extremely fast, and I felt that the characters could have been more fleshed out, especially Wahlberg and Zooey Deschanel's characters. There's a sequence at the end that could have been helped with some more character development.

I'd give it maybe a six out of ten at the highest, mainly because Shyamalan continues to have some damn good cinematography in his films. Give credit where credit's due. The suicide stuff was also good, and the woman at the end of the film is possibly the most interesting character in the film, and is almost more legitimately scary than the shit that is "happening"
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: drew on June 17, 2008, 12:57:43 AM
so what's the twist?  spoiler away, I'd rather not line Shyamalamalan's pockets with money.
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Bloodwake on June 17, 2008, 12:58:59 AM
so what's the twist?  spoiler away, I'd rather not line Shyamalamalan's pockets with money.

There really isn't one.
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: MrAngryFace on June 17, 2008, 01:03:13 AM
(http://upload.moldova.org/movie/directors/m_night_shyamalan/thumbnails/tn2_m_night_shyamalan_3.jpg)
You are wrong. There is a tweest!
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: The Fake Shemp on June 17, 2008, 01:06:21 AM
The twist is that Bloodwake thought we'd take his opinion seriously!  Crap movie.
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Phoenix Dark on June 17, 2008, 01:07:49 AM
after i saw planet of the apes i wanted to go to the zoo and punch a monkey. if i ever saw the happening (i won't pay to see it) i'd probably burn down a forest
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Raban on June 17, 2008, 01:10:04 AM
so what's the twist?  spoiler away, I'd rather not line Shyamalamalan's pockets with money.

It's a toxin that comes out of plants because we've been polluting the Earth. The toxin is centered at a 'self-preservation' node in the brain and destroys it, so people begin committing suicide.

The Happening is easily the shittiest movie I've ever seen. The acting was worse than laughably bad, the writing even worse than that. The camera work was some of the most awkward and distinguished mentally-challenged shit I've ever had to force my brain to be damaged by. I'm extremely thankful I didn't pay for it, because my brother had told me the movie was gonna be amazing, and I lol'd and decided to go with him to see how bad he'd get owned. He wanted his money back after the movie.

I'm not kidding, this movie has a scene where people are running away from wind blowing grass around in a field.
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Joe Molotov on June 17, 2008, 01:11:34 AM
I kinda want to see The Happening, but I know I'll just hate myself later. Maybe I'll wait for the $1 showing.
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Raban on June 17, 2008, 01:13:43 AM
I kinda want to see The Happening, but I know I'll just hate myself later. Maybe I'll wait for the $1 showing.

Seriously, just pirate a cam. It's not worth even 50 cents.
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Vizzys on June 17, 2008, 01:14:27 AM
so what's the twist?  spoiler away, I'd rather not line Shyamalamalan's pockets with money.

I'm not kidding, this movie has a scene where people are running away from wind blowing grass around in a field.

that is hilarious
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Phoenix Dark on June 17, 2008, 01:22:53 AM
did you guys see the rolling stone review?
http://www.rollingstone.com/reviews/movie/17032749/review/21254080/the_happening

Horrible movies get horrible reviews every year but I dunno if I've seen so many reviews that follow a pattern in their construction/writing. I've seen many quick, 2-3 sentence reviews of this thing. I remember hearing that Shallyman was a fucking tool to reporters/critics/studio execs/etc. I'd imagine that if he started releasing quality material they'd give him fair reviews (just look at Kanye West) but instead he releases shit and gets some of the most vitriolic bashings ha

He's a great technical director. All his films have great camera work, Unbreakable especially sticking out to me at least. I just don't understand why he can't just adapt someone else's script instead of writing his own. He can't write: his dialogue is pretty horrible, although sometimes it's serviceable like in Unbreakable although even that movie has some ugly spots (like Jackson confronting the father who wants to buy the comic cover for his son, only to be promptly asked if he sees an asian boy with a distant expression riding on a toy airplane machine...you know, shit you'd see at a fucking toy shop god dammit!). How hard is it to read someone's script and take it? Seems like less work than doing it yourself. Studios are still giving him money afterall; The Happening is already half way to making up it's budget
http://boxofficemojo.com/people/chart/?view=Director&id=shyamalan.htm

Outside of the Lady in the Water abortion (admit it Mupepe!) his shit makes bank


Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: drew on June 17, 2008, 01:23:28 AM
It's a toxin that comes out of plants because we've been polluting the Earth. The toxin is centered at a 'self-preservation' node in the brain and destroys it, so people begin committing suicide.

The Happening is easily the shittiest movie I've ever seen. The acting was worse than laughably bad, the writing even worse than that. The camera work was some of the most awkward and distinguished mentally-challenged shit I've ever had to force my brain to be damaged by. I'm extremely thankful I didn't pay for it, because my brother had told me the movie was gonna be amazing, and I lol'd and decided to go with him to see how bad he'd get owned. He wanted his money back after the movie.

I'm not kidding, this movie has a scene where people are running away from wind blowing grass around in a field.

this must be M. Night Shyamalan's brother:

[youtube=425,350]Y9u5cA7WGCA[/youtube]

smh

I knew this movie would be shit when some kid got all excited after seeing a commercial for this, telling me it would be "awesome", then went on to say that I am Legend was a pretty good zombie movie and that he likes will smith movies.
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: The Fake Shemp on June 17, 2008, 01:23:59 AM
You're insane, PD.  That was one of the best parts of Unbreakable.  Sam Jackson brought the lulz.
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Phoenix Dark on June 17, 2008, 01:25:28 AM
no, no, no, no, NO

you need to leave
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Scurvy Stan on June 17, 2008, 01:34:51 AM
Sounds like a metaphor for allergy sufferers.

THE ONLY THING THAT CAN SAVE US IS ....

NON-DROWSY ZYRTEC!
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Tauntaun on June 17, 2008, 10:56:03 AM
My friend decided on this instead of HULK SMASH!  I'll have to talk to him and see how he feels now.   
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Bloodwake on June 17, 2008, 12:38:35 PM
Shayamalamalamadingdong films:

The good:
Sixth Sense
Unbreakable
Signs

The okay:
The Happening

The bad:
Lady in the Water
The Village



IMO
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Powerslave on June 17, 2008, 12:46:16 PM
Get back to bollywood taco.
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: WrikaWrek on June 17, 2008, 12:50:36 PM
It was piece of shit.
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Mupepe on June 17, 2008, 12:55:43 PM


Outside of the Lady in the Water abortion (admit it Mupepe!) his shit makes bank


Lady in the Water is a concept > execution movie for me. 

I like all his movies on some level besides signs.  The guy has some good ideas, he's a good technical director and a terrible writer at best. 
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Phoenix Dark on June 17, 2008, 01:14:42 PM


Outside of the Lady in the Water abortion (admit it Mupepe!) his shit makes bank


Lady in the Water is a concept > execution movie for me. 

Like Saw and Escape from NY
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Mupepe on June 17, 2008, 01:25:19 PM


Outside of the Lady in the Water abortion (admit it Mupepe!) his shit makes bank


Lady in the Water is a concept > execution movie for me. 

Like Saw and Escape from NY
I like both of those legitimately though
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Phoenix Dark on June 17, 2008, 01:31:01 PM
no tossed salad for you tonight  :-\
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: Bloodwake on June 17, 2008, 05:32:29 PM
Escape from NY is decent though.
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: BobFromPikeCreek on June 18, 2008, 12:18:23 AM
The Happening fucking ruled. Not sure if it was intended, but one of the funniest movies I've seen in the longest while. Every line of dialog by every character was poorly worded and awkwardly delivered, but in the absolute funniest possible ways.
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: The Sceneman on June 22, 2008, 06:51:17 AM
yeah Im with Bob, I went to this tonight and I was cracking up the whole way through. Marky Mark is my favourite actor hands down. He acts so good omg :heartbeat Mark Wahlberg :heartbeat

and the main babe was fuuuuuucckinggg hot
Title: Re: Bloodwake's Verdict on The Happening
Post by: The Sceneman on June 22, 2008, 06:52:51 AM


Outside of the Lady in the Water abortion (admit it Mupepe!) his shit makes bank


Lady in the Water is a concept > execution movie for me. 

Like Saw and Escape from NY


Saw is fucking awful, so is Lady in the Water. Escape from Ny is good, I honestly dont understand this comparison/discussion