THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: Mandark on November 06, 2008, 04:05:57 AM

Title: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Mandark on November 06, 2008, 04:05:57 AM: In the other thread we were introduced to the idea of a sort of Reverse Transgression Discount Rate: anything mean you do today is the equivalent of something much worse in the past.

Right now we're calibrating the rate with 1 Trolling A Ninthing 2008 = 1 Murdering A Queer 1908.

So what past crimes have you committed, or might as well have?

By calling George W. Bush a distinguished mentally-challenged fellow in 2008, I paid a penny to laugh at the patients of Bedlam in 1708. I also may have committed regicide at some time, but to pinpoint the date I'd need a bigger abacus.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 06, 2008, 04:08:57 AM: i told kaijima on gaf that he was, and i quote, "a fucked up furry"

i suspect that makes me at LEAST a borgia nephew
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: TVC15 on November 06, 2008, 04:11:04 AM: I've said the phrase "all women are whores" at least ten times in the past year. What does that net me? Can I maybe get one of the Crusades?
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Mandark on November 06, 2008, 04:12:47 AM: Quote from: TVC 15 on November 06, 2008, 04:11:04 AM
I've said the phrase "all women are whores" at least ten times in the past year. What does that net me? Can I maybe get one of the Crusades?

With the right credit history I could offer you a great deal on the Rape of Nanking.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: TVC15 on November 06, 2008, 04:14:03 AM: Quote from: Mandark on November 06, 2008, 04:12:47 AM
Quote from: TVC 15 on November 06, 2008, 04:11:04 AM
I've said the phrase "all women are whores" at least ten times in the past year. What does that net me? Can I maybe get one of the Crusades?

With the right credit history I could offer you a great deal on the Rape of Nanking.

The Chinese or the Japanese version? Because that makes it between a few tens of thousands killed vs a few hundred killed.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 06, 2008, 04:14:18 AM: if as the calendar date recedes the atrocities scale geometrically, my fits of underaged drinking possibly eradicated the neanderthal genus
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: TVC15 on November 06, 2008, 04:18:06 AM: Quote from: Genghis Cohen on November 06, 2008, 04:15:58 AM
Can anyone tell me what I would have to do within a reasonable margin of error to leapfrog Gengis Khan? I want to be the most famous Genghis ever.

I think the only possible way would be to holocaust white people. He's one Genghis that's hard to top.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Tristam on November 06, 2008, 04:19:32 AM: Quote from: Genghis Cohen on November 06, 2008, 04:15:58 AM
Can anyone tell me what I would have to do within a reasonable margin of error to leapfrog Gengis Khan? I want to be the most famous Genghis ever.

Punch Miyamoto.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Mandark on November 06, 2008, 04:19:55 AM: Quote from: Tristam on November 06, 2008, 04:19:32 AM
Quote from: Genghis Cohen on November 06, 2008, 04:15:58 AM
Can anyone tell me what I would have to do within a reasonable margin of error to leapfrog Gengis Khan? I want to be the most famous Genghis ever.

Punch Miyamoto.
:lol
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Flannel Boy on November 06, 2008, 04:24:30 AM: :rofl
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Flannel Boy on November 06, 2008, 04:31:59 AM: I hastily wrote my first law paper tonight, spending more time surfing for porn, eating an extra large pizza, drinking eight shots of vodka, and reading that abortion of a thread. Also, I accidentally chose a case involving a black woman killing her black husband's white mistress.

So I think that's means I created all the Jim Crow laws.

Also, I'm not going to proof-read the paper, because it's 3:09 AM.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: cloudwalking on November 06, 2008, 04:36:56 AM: Quote from: Tristam on November 06, 2008, 04:19:32 AM
Quote from: Genghis Cohen on November 06, 2008, 04:15:58 AM
Can anyone tell me what I would have to do within a reasonable margin of error to leapfrog Gengis Khan? I want to be the most famous Genghis ever.

Punch Miyamoto.

punching miyamoto in 2008 however is the eqivalent of sending 110,000 japanese-americans to interment camps in 1942
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Mandark on November 06, 2008, 04:41:00 AM: cloudwalking has big knockers.

This is clearly equivalent to tempting Adam with the apple and getting humanity expelled from Paradise for all time.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: The Fake Shemp on November 06, 2008, 04:43:53 AM: One time, I sneered at a crying baby in a convenient store. What does this net me?
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Mandark on November 06, 2008, 04:44:53 AM: Quote from: Willco on November 06, 2008, 04:43:53 AM
One time, I sneered at a crying baby in a convenient store. What does this net me?

Your callous reaction to the misery of others makes you Nero. Marie Antoinette at the very minimum.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: The Fake Shemp on November 06, 2008, 04:46:10 AM: What would be the modern day equivalent of the Holocaust? Buying Apple products?
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Mandark on November 06, 2008, 04:48:29 AM: Since the category is Atrocities Committed Against The Jews (very popular), I'd say voting Obama.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: The Fake Shemp on November 06, 2008, 05:08:17 AM: I imagine calling the authorities on a loud party would be akin to alerting the Nazis to Anne Frank.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: drohne on November 06, 2008, 05:24:24 AM: refused to accept wacky christian flier from man in parking lot, 2008 a.d. = jeered christ during march to golgotha, ca. 0 a.d.

i was close enough to miyamoto to have punched him at a zelda event prior to e3 05. i was perhaps another couple complimentary beers away from becoming an inflation adjusted hitler!
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Howard Alan Treesong on November 06, 2008, 07:22:10 AM: I paid a traffic ticket today because it seemed like too much trouble to deal with the courts, that's the 1208 equivalent of a venal addiction to papal indulgences
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Akala on November 06, 2008, 08:36:18 AM: I slammed the door on two Mormons once, that equates to heading the Temple for Robespierre. :'(
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Crushed on November 06, 2008, 09:09:04 AM: I didn't buy MGS4. Pretty sure that converts to the firebombing of Tokyo.

spoiler (click to show/hide)
Kojima's parents actually lived in Tokyo during the bombings, and their stories influenced his games, so I guess that's double points for irony.
[close]
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Human Snorenado on November 06, 2008, 09:56:27 AM: I have a tendency to say horrible, horrible things while drunk. For instance, I once made a pretty young lesbian cry by saying "That's gay; and by gay I mean happy, because that's worse than homosexual." I suppose that means I wrote Prop 8.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Eric P on November 06, 2008, 10:54:06 AM: Quote from: The Card Cheat on November 06, 2008, 09:56:27 AM
I have a tendency to say horrible, horrible things while drunk. For instance, I once made a pretty young lesbian cry by saying "That's gay; and by gay I mean happy, because that's worse than homosexual." I suppose that means I wrote Prop 8.

ha ha

women, amirite?

but yeah, i do some horrible things when drunk and surly
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: drozmight on November 06, 2008, 01:11:49 PM: I was watching TV the other night and there was video of this horrific crane accident that killed 5 people and I laughed.

Could this make me a murderous crusader during the siege of Jerusalem in 1099?
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Brehvolution on November 06, 2008, 01:33:49 PM: I got drunk and screwed a fatty at a friends party a long time ago. I guess the equivalent would be flying too low and taking out power lines in Spain, December 1961.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Joe Molotov on November 06, 2008, 06:08:33 PM: I pirated a copy of Vampire the Masquerade - Bloodlines and I really liked it, but I never got around to buying a legit copy until after Troika had already gone out of business. I think this probably equivalent to pillaging and raping across the Caribbean during the mid-late 1600's.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: T234 on November 06, 2008, 06:20:25 PM: Quote from: Genghis Cohen on November 06, 2008, 04:55:48 AM
Does trolling Sega fans work in reverse? Like one ironic Sonic furry pic posted to mock them=Berlin airlift?
Alot of Sega fans stopped acknowledging the furries.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Mupepe on November 06, 2008, 06:25:10 PM: I'm pretty good at making women cheat repeatedly. What does that make me in my past lives? And more importantly, in my future lives?
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Mupepe on November 06, 2008, 06:26:36 PM: I'm also watching When Animals Attack III. Does this mean I fed Christians to the lions?
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Oblivion on November 06, 2008, 06:30:03 PM: I declined a friend's invitation to have fun at a casino once.

Guess that means I'm responsible for the Trail of Tears?
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Mupepe on November 06, 2008, 06:30:33 PM: Quote from: Oblivion on November 06, 2008, 06:30:03 PM
I declined a friend's invitation to have fun at a casino once.

Guess that means I'm responsible for the Trail of Tears?
Something to be proud of IMO.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Oblivion on November 06, 2008, 06:38:24 PM: Quote from: Rob Thomas on November 06, 2008, 06:30:33 PM
Quote from: Oblivion on November 06, 2008, 06:30:03 PM
I declined a friend's invitation to have fun at a casino once.

Guess that means I'm responsible for the Trail of Tears?
Something to be proud of IMO.

Damn skippy. :pimp
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Van Cruncheon on November 06, 2008, 07:10:15 PM: borys' wedding dress antics make him the very reincarnation of vlad tepes
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Himu on November 06, 2008, 07:15:01 PM: What crime does anime pirating net me?
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Olivia Wilde Homo on November 06, 2008, 07:16:05 PM: The Mongol raid of Baghdad
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Oblivion on November 06, 2008, 07:17:37 PM: Quote from: Himuro on November 06, 2008, 07:15:01 PM
What crime does anime pirating net me?

Actually, I think THIS would be a more appropriate equivalent for the rape of Nanking.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Himu on November 06, 2008, 07:18:43 PM: What about jay walking?
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Oblivion on November 06, 2008, 07:21:52 PM: Quote from: Himuro on November 06, 2008, 07:18:43 PM
What about jay walking?

Something from the Spanish Inquisition, I reckon.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Crushed on November 06, 2008, 07:26:46 PM: Spanish Inquisition? Way too harsh for something like jay walking.

Definitely the equivalent of being a 16th century Florentine pederast.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Flannel Boy on November 06, 2008, 07:30:52 PM: Crushed, I say he's guilty of burning down the Library of Alexandria with his Muslim brothers
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: TVC15 on November 06, 2008, 07:32:41 PM: What sort of sins would I have to commit in order to have past-me attend the Banquet of Chestnuts (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banquet_of_Chestnuts)?
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Mupepe on November 06, 2008, 07:33:35 PM: Quote from: TVC 15 on November 06, 2008, 07:32:41 PM
What sort of sins would I have to commit in order to have past-me attend the Banquet of Chestnuts (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banquet_of_Chestnuts)?
Get over here and we'll commit the sins together
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: TVC15 on November 06, 2008, 07:36:31 PM: The Borgias were so awesome. Coolest family ever? Helped the church lose its status, patrons of the arts, notorious murderers, and the proto-mafia.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Crushed on November 06, 2008, 07:37:55 PM: Quote from: TVC 15 on November 06, 2008, 07:32:41 PM
What sort of sins would I have to commit in order to have past-me attend the Banquet of Chestnuts (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banquet_of_Chestnuts)?

sins? that's not a historical crime, it's historical awesome
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: T234 on November 06, 2008, 08:02:24 PM: Quote from: Genghis Cohen on November 06, 2008, 06:25:03 PM
Quote from: T234 on November 06, 2008, 06:20:25 PM
Quote from: Genghis Cohen on November 06, 2008, 04:55:48 AM
Does trolling Sega fans work in reverse? Like one ironic Sonic furry pic posted to mock them=Berlin airlift?
Alot of Sega fans stopped acknowledging the furries.
That sounds like closet Sega fan talk.
AIN'T NO CLOSET HOMIE

:supergay :supergay :supergay :supergay :supergay :supergay :supergay :supergay :supergay
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Joe Molotov on November 06, 2008, 08:52:48 PM: Quote from: Himuro on November 06, 2008, 07:15:01 PM
What crime does anime pirating net me?

Freeing the slaves.
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Oblivion on November 06, 2008, 09:03:35 PM: Quote from: Joe Molotov on November 06, 2008, 08:52:48 PM
Quote from: Himuro on November 06, 2008, 07:15:01 PM
What crime does anime pirating net me?

Freeing the slaves.

:rofl :rofl
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: recursivelyenumerable on November 06, 2008, 09:41:09 PM: isn't it deflation? :wag
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: drohne on November 06, 2008, 10:10:38 PM: 'inflation adjusted' implies 'deflation adjusted'
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: drohne on November 06, 2008, 10:15:12 PM: made fun of etiolate's reverse transgression discount rate theory = participated in the reeducation of dissidents in maoist china = burned heretics in inquisitional spain = brained an uppity neanderthal for using sharpened stone tools to flay a carcass
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: drohne on November 06, 2008, 10:20:18 PM: hang on, i think we've yet to apprehend this theory's full significance

i mean, i strangled a prostitute last week, but in a civlized, attenuated, etiolated future that would only be equivalent perhaps to failing to hold a door open for a woman
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Flannel Boy on November 06, 2008, 10:54:15 PM: Quote from: drohne on November 06, 2008, 10:20:18 PM
hang on, i think we've yet to apprehend this theory's full significance

i mean, i strangled a prostitute last week, but in a civlized, attenuated, etiolated future that would only be equivalent perhaps to failing to hold a door open for a woman

:rofl :rofl :rofl
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: The Fake Shemp on November 06, 2008, 11:22:12 PM: :lol
Title: Re: Adjusting for inflation, what historical crimes have you committed?
Post by: Himu on November 11, 2008, 09:12:20 AM: Quote from: Joe Molotov on November 06, 2008, 08:52:48 PM
Quote from: Himuro on November 06, 2008, 07:15:01 PM
What crime does anime pirating net me?

Freeing the slaves.

:lol :lol