THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: Van Cruncheon on April 21, 2009, 11:23:34 PM

Title: help me, mactards
Post by: Van Cruncheon on April 21, 2009, 11:23:34 PM
jesus christ macs are the shittiest excuses for computers ever

anyway, i need to get my imac, whose hard drive just kicked the bucket, to eject a fuckin' dvd on boot. i have tried booting and holding the mouse button, and booting and holding down apple+alt+o+f. neither have forced the dvd to eject.

if this was a pc, i coulda painlessly pulled the hd and swapped in a new one -OR- i coulda stuck a pin in a hole near the DVD slot and forced it to eject. but since apple had to compensate for people that shit their pants whenever they see a computer screen, i am forced to leave a friend's copy of leopard trapped in its pearly white tomb. help me!
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Eric P on April 21, 2009, 11:25:28 PM
the mac, sensing its imminent death, recouped its leopard license by eating the disc.

this is all covered extensively in the manual
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Eric P on April 21, 2009, 11:27:01 PM
here is the page culled directly from the knowledgebase

(http://media.bigoo.ws/content/gif/cartoon/cartoon_392.gif)
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Van Cruncheon on April 21, 2009, 11:27:19 PM
i feel better already!
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Rman on April 21, 2009, 11:28:35 PM
Is there an eject pin hole?  If there is you should be able to stick a needle in it for manual eject.  Not too familiar with iMacs since I've only used Mac notebooks for the most part.
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Van Cruncheon on April 21, 2009, 11:29:31 PM
no pinhole
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: huckleberry on April 21, 2009, 11:31:48 PM
There should be a manual eject pinhole in the old while iMacs. The newer ones do not have that "option". Apparently Apple knows better than you what you need.


Anyway.  If you have Leopard installed already you could try to drag the disc to the trash.  If that fails you can go into drive utility and try to eject it that way.....if the fucker is making a clicking sound then you are fucked royal and will have to take it to a "genius".
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: drozmight on April 21, 2009, 11:32:00 PM
You're going to have to make an appointment with a MAC genius.
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Van Cruncheon on April 21, 2009, 11:32:48 PM
i have a core duo imac, 15"

no pinhole :'(
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Positive Touch on April 21, 2009, 11:33:38 PM
make a hole with your fist
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Eric P on April 21, 2009, 11:36:46 PM
(http://media.bigoo.ws/content/glitter/miscellaneous/miscellaneous_606.gif)
"sparkly cat tech support.  this is mittens, how may i help you?"

(http://home.comcast.net/~erickson.doug/catdance.gif)
"my disk got stuck in the dvdrom drive and now it won't eject on boot"

(http://media.bigoo.ws/content/glitter/miscellaneous/miscellaneous_606.gif)
oh no!  how horrible worrible!  do you need a hug?

(http://home.comcast.net/~erickson.doug/catdance.gif)
no just the disk.


(http://media.bigoo.ws/content/glitter/miscellaneous/miscellaneous_606.gif)
have you tried ejecting it?


(http://home.comcast.net/~erickson.doug/catdance.gif)
i would love to eject it, but the machine won't boot past post

(http://media.bigoo.ws/content/glitter/miscellaneous/miscellaneous_606.gif)
i have post!  it scratchy watchy it when my claws are toooooooo long.

(http://home.comcast.net/~erickson.doug/catdance.gif)
that's not what i--

(http://media.bigoo.ws/content/glitter/miscellaneous/miscellaneous_606.gif)
have you tried the pinholey wolley?

(http://home.comcast.net/~erickson.doug/catdance.gif)
there isn't one.  if this were a windows mach--


(http://media.bigoo.ws/content/glitter/miscellaneous/miscellaneous_606.gif)
HISSSS

(http://home.comcast.net/~erickson.doug/catdance.gif)
...

(http://media.bigoo.ws/content/glitter/miscellaneous/miscellaneous_606.gif)
that was a dirty wordy.

(http://home.comcast.net/~erickson.doug/catdance.gif)
can you help me or not?

(http://media.bigoo.ws/content/glitter/miscellaneous/miscellaneous_606.gif)
have you followed the instructions when something doesn't go right?  referenced clearly on page 3 of the manual under "advanced set up"

(http://home.comcast.net/~erickson.doug/catdance.gif)
it says "wish with all your might"

(http://media.bigoo.ws/content/glitter/miscellaneous/miscellaneous_606.gif)
and did you?

(http://home.comcast.net/~erickson.doug/catdance.gif)
...no.  would that actually help?

(http://media.bigoo.ws/content/glitter/miscellaneous/miscellaneous_606.gif)
oh yes, if enough people wish hard enough, the magical pixies will capture the bug report and place a correction in a future hardware revision.


(http://home.comcast.net/~erickson.doug/catdance.gif)
that doesn't actually help me with my current machine though


(http://media.bigoo.ws/content/glitter/miscellaneous/miscellaneous_606.gif)
yes but that's broken and why would you want to waste any time on something that's broken?  that doesn't may any sensey wensey you big silly chum chum!
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: huckleberry on April 21, 2009, 11:37:17 PM
Those Mac geniuses have the same fucking look in their faces at every Apple store too....starry eyed and brainwashed.  Either that, or they are the highest paid fucks in all of retail.
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Van Cruncheon on April 21, 2009, 11:40:34 PM
:lol :lol :'(
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Howard Alan Treesong on April 21, 2009, 11:53:09 PM
:lol
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Barry Egan on April 21, 2009, 11:56:27 PM
 :lol A+
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: drew on April 22, 2009, 12:00:44 AM
any macfag worth their salt has an eject icon in the menubar
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Van Cruncheon on April 22, 2009, 12:06:26 AM
any macfag worth their salt has an eject icon in the menubar

that would be great if i could GET TO A MENUBAR

fuck, i get a terminal and run diskutil eject /dev/disk1 and it says volume could not eject so i think i know a LITTLE SOMETHING ABOUT COMPUTERS, even shitty mcshitshit ones like the mac
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Akala on April 22, 2009, 12:10:23 AM
Eric  :lol
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Arbys Roast Beef Sandwich on April 22, 2009, 12:13:12 AM
fuckin rad stuff

oh my God :rofl
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Brehvolution on April 22, 2009, 12:24:15 AM
:bow Eric P :bow2
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: BlueTsunami on April 22, 2009, 12:26:06 AM
Ban Malek

Icon Eric P... oh wait

:bow

And not having a fail safe eject button is wtf

:piss Apple :piss2

The probably has some proprietary torx poking tool, only for iMacs!
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Don Flamenco on April 22, 2009, 01:49:15 AM
good shit.  Icon Sparkle Cat


as for macs, yeah, I had just gotten finished telling my friend that i was happy I switched over.  Then I kinda dropped it from 3 feet onto a couch, where it landed kinda hard on a cushion.  I opened it and had a question mark on my screen.  Turns out the macbook stopped recognizing the hard drive after the knock and to recover it, I had to put in the start up disc and do some shit.  Well, that didn't work and then the disc didn't eject.  :\

luckily it randomly started working again a few minutes later, but those few minutes were pretty tense while the fucking computer ate the disc. would be ridiculously silly to open the thing up just for a disc.

point is, I don't know why the fuck they designed it like that and I have no insight into the problem.
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: T-Short on April 22, 2009, 03:05:11 AM
Prole, which generation iMac is it? if it's a slotloader, I might have a deliciously distinguished mentally-challenged solution to this.

edit: oh wait, HDD bought the farm, does it just boot up to questionmark?
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Van Cruncheon on April 22, 2009, 03:11:10 AM
first of the core duo imacs (white, monitor+console combined)
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: T-Short on April 22, 2009, 03:12:36 AM
ok. does the dvd spin up on boot?
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Van Cruncheon on April 22, 2009, 03:13:13 AM
yup
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: T-Short on April 22, 2009, 03:17:20 AM
ok. this is crazy, but what I do when this happens is stick something (no, tauntaun) into the slotloader to PHYSICALLY stop the disc from spinning up. since the HDD won't boot the mac is probably desperately trying to check if the DVD is bootable, and goes into some dumb loop. I usually use a couple of business cards or something like that. sometimes it ejects almost right away, sometimes it's a little more bitchy. i've done this on three separate occasions. total caveman style
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Van Cruncheon on April 22, 2009, 03:29:54 AM
i actually got it to boot the leopard disc, and am installing on the new hd. i would never, EVER wish taking apart an imac case on my worst enemy
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: BlueTsunami on April 22, 2009, 03:36:11 AM
I opened an older iMac once (the CRT ones, trying to get to the HDD). The way they layered everything, total madness. The HDD was in its bowels, where normal sized screw drivers will not venture.
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: T-Short on April 22, 2009, 04:49:16 AM
some of the slotloaders around that generation are just terrible, I have a MBP from around the same time and my superdrive refuses to read 3 out of 4 burned discs.  :(
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: Tauntaun on April 22, 2009, 10:39:17 AM
ok. this is crazy, but what I do when this happens is stick something (no, tauntaun) into the slotloader to PHYSICALLY stop the disc from spinning up. since the HDD won't boot the mac is probably desperately trying to check if the DVD is bootable, and goes into some dumb loop. I usually use a couple of business cards or something like that. sometimes it ejects almost right away, sometimes it's a little more bitchy. i've done this on three separate occasions. total caveman style

Macs can't handle the Tauntaun.  :pimp

:bow EricP :bow2

:piss Mac :piss2
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: T234 on April 22, 2009, 10:48:45 AM
Eric P, I shall drink the Woodford in my glovebox when I get home in your honor. I laughed so hard last night when I was stoned that I just about shit my pants.
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: chronovore on April 22, 2009, 11:30:49 PM
Try the Zoolander iMac fix.
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: GoofyGoober on April 23, 2009, 02:20:47 PM
Does your MAC keyboard not have the CDROM eject key? I had a similar problem with my Mac Mini and the eject key on the keyboard got the disc out for me.
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: drew on April 23, 2009, 02:22:57 PM
when i first got my mbp the same thing happened but w/out the boot probs

sometimes the eject key simply wont work
Title: Re: help me, mactards
Post by: FlameOfCallandor on April 23, 2009, 04:52:53 PM
This happened to me when I was trying to instal vista on my mac last christmas. Big mistake. I forget what I did. I think I just restarted and held down the eject key?