THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: Borys on March 01, 2010, 02:17:26 AM

Title: Topic
Post by: Borys on March 01, 2010, 02:17:26 AM

`

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Howard Alan Treesong on March 01, 2010, 02:47:44 AM

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/interrupting

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: CajoleJuice on March 01, 2010, 02:52:23 AM

[youtube=560,345]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZuxnRWtA4Vc[/youtube]

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Vizzys on March 01, 2010, 02:55:12 AM

[youtube=560,345]7DEC87Ao0Do[/youtube]

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Green Shinobi on March 01, 2010, 03:03:05 AM

An Irish guy walks out of a bar...

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Cormacaroni on March 01, 2010, 03:08:46 AM

I want to hear Borys' worst joke now. It can only be funnier.

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Powerslave on March 01, 2010, 03:13:00 AM

Borys is a great poster.

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Powerslave on March 01, 2010, 03:23:36 AM

Give Borys the "Greatest Poster on Evilbore" position.

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Agent Whiskers on March 01, 2010, 04:39:33 AM

Quote from: CajoleJuice on March 01, 2010, 02:52:23 AM

[youtube=560,345]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZuxnRWtA4Vc[/youtube]

:lol

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: The Sceneman on March 01, 2010, 04:43:20 AM

Quote from: CajoleJuice on March 01, 2010, 02:52:23 AM

[youtube=560,345]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZuxnRWtA4Vc[/youtube]

fucking hell  :lol

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: The Sceneman on March 01, 2010, 04:47:28 AM

okay heres the best one I can think of right now:

Q: How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?

A: Put him in the microwave until its bill withers!

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: EmCeeGrammar on March 01, 2010, 07:08:17 AM

What do you call some kids waiting to get a drink at the dance?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

A punch line

[close]

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Barry Egan on March 01, 2010, 07:31:11 AM

Quote from: Synthesizer Patel on March 01, 2010, 02:47:44 AM

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/interrupting

:lol

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: brob on March 01, 2010, 07:50:38 AM

Why do jews have big noses?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

cus air is free :teehee

[close]

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Hitler Stole My Potato on March 01, 2010, 07:51:11 AM

The only one I can think of off hand -

What's the worst part about eating bald pussy?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Taking off the diaper.

[close]

 :drake

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Groogrux on March 01, 2010, 03:52:12 PM

[youtube=560,345]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tw10xa_xtNg[/youtube]

IMO, better than Bob Saget's version.

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Robo on March 01, 2010, 04:00:28 PM

Quote from: Hitler Stole My Potato on March 01, 2010, 07:51:11 AM

The only one I can think of off hand -

What's the worst part about eating bald pussy?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Taking off the diaper.

[close]

 :drake

 oh my god  :rofl

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Herr Mafflard on March 01, 2010, 04:25:41 PM

only ones I can think of off-hand

What should you do when you miss your mother in law?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

aim more carefully next time

[close]

What's the difference between Bono and God?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

God doesn't think he's Bono

[close]

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Mupepe on March 01, 2010, 04:33:52 PM

dead baby jokes!

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Bildi on March 01, 2010, 06:58:16 PM

I heard these two last week, they're not even rude!

Husband: What would you do if I won the lottery?
Wife: I'd take half and leave you.
Husband: Good, I won 12 bucks.  Here's six, piss off.

Blonde: I'm sore all over doc, no matter where I poke myself, it's painful.
Doctor: You have a sore finger.

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: ferrarimanf355 on March 01, 2010, 07:54:13 PM

What do the Starship Enterprise and a roll of toilet paper have in common?

They both go around Uranus looking for Klingons.

Kevin Eubanks and the Tonight Show Band, everyone!

 :lenowned

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Bocsius on March 01, 2010, 08:04:33 PM

Quote from: Bildi on March 01, 2010, 06:58:16 PM

Blonde: I'm sore all over doc, no matter where I poke myself, it's painful.
Doctor: You have a sore finger.

Broken finger guy from House rings a bell.


And Borys, dude, the interrupting cow knock-knock is hard enough for people to get it right in person. Generally, it takes someone with a jovial personality just to pull it off and not make you think "dumbest joke ever." But if you're going to type it.... for the love of... I mean...

Interrupt something.


...something something Americans love Polish jokes for a reason.

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Bildi on March 01, 2010, 08:15:08 PM

How do you stop a blind girl from phoning her parents?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Break all her fingers.

[close]

I probably head that in the last evilbore joke thread.

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Mandark on March 01, 2010, 09:18:27 PM

WILLCO:  You know what you find in the dictionary when you look up "butthurt"?

GREEN SHINOBI:  What, a picture of me?

WILLCO:  No, the definition of butthurt, which you fucking are!

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: demi on March 01, 2010, 09:22:39 PM

Quote from: Green Shinobi on March 01, 2010, 09:11:29 PM

What's the difference between Ichirou and acne?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

One waits until you're 13 to come on your face.

[close]

What did Ichirou say to Roman Polanski?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Trade you a ten for two fives.

[close]

What does Ichirou like best about twenty-eight year olds?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

There's twenty of them.

[close]

What does Ichirou get when he cuts an eight year old in half?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

A hard-on.

[close]

What does Ichirou like better than sex with an eight year old girl?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Sex with an eight year old boy.

[close]

What does Ichirou like better than sex with an eight year old boy?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Nothing, man, nothing.

[close]

lmao. Best jokes of the thread. Fucking Ichirou.

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Hitler Stole My Potato on March 01, 2010, 09:24:12 PM

Quote from: Green Shinobi on March 01, 2010, 09:11:29 PM

What's the difference between Ichirou and acne?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

One waits until you're 13 to come on your face.

[close]

What did Ichirou say to Roman Polanski?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Trade you a ten for two fives.

[close]

What does Ichirou like best about twenty-eight year olds?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

There's twenty of them.

[close]

What does Ichirou get when he cuts an eight year old in half?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

A hard-on.

[close]

What does Ichirou like better than sex with an eight year old girl?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Sex with an eight year old boy.

[close]

What does Ichirou like better than sex with an eight year old boy?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Nothing, man, nothing.

[close]

 :rofl

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Bildi on March 01, 2010, 09:30:45 PM

:rofl

I'm sure Ichirou will take them like the man he is.

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: CajoleJuice on March 02, 2010, 04:04:57 AM

Quote from: Mandark on March 01, 2010, 09:18:27 PM

WILLCO:  You know what you find in the dictionary when you look up "butthurt"?

GREEN SHINOBI:  What, a picture of me?

WILLCO:  No, the definition of butthurt, which you fucking are!

This is supposed to be funny?

/eurotrash

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Only like two people might get this

[close]

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: brob on March 02, 2010, 04:49:30 AM

Quote from: Kosma on March 01, 2010, 05:12:10 PM

[

I bet you googled that with "jew jokes"

I know you did in fact

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I found it too

[close]

Lies! I heard it years ago when a neo-nazi came to our school to talk about how awesome white people are.

Other favorites include; What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a distinguished black fellow and what's Hitler's favorite football team.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

the bucket

[close]

spoiler (click to show/hide)

blackburn

[close]

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: chronovore on January 14, 2015, 09:43:43 PM

So I thought about starting a joke thread, but we already have one, and I don’t care to relinquish my title as Thread Lich.

My son wanted some time with his grandmother, so my wife and I took the opportunity to have her stay over and look after him, and we could enjoy our own date night. Things went pretty well; we left and had a good evening out, and when we came back, “Grandma” was passed out in the guest room, my son was asleep in his room, so my wife and I decided to finish the evening with some long-overdue sex.

Everything was going great, but I guess the action got a little loud, because right as things are about to wrap up, there’s my son in the doorway, staring at my wife and I, naked and boning like college students. I let out a panicked giggle, and he ran off without a word.

Jesus. OK, Thinking I should make this right before it traumatized him, I pulled on pajama bottoms and went to his room to talk to him about it. But he’s not there. His bed is empty.

I went to the guest room to see if he was complaining to Grandma about it, and there he was, naked and on top of Grandma, hips pumping away furiously. He said, “Hey! Not so damned funny when it’s YOUR mom, right?!"

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: benjipwns on January 14, 2015, 09:47:54 PM

If you give a man fire, he's warm for a day.
If you set a man on fire, he's warm for the rest of his life.

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: I'm a Puppy! on January 14, 2015, 11:57:11 PM

Not my best joke but one of my better puns I made up.

A few months ago my daughter was telling me that she had this nightmare that she was put into an oven. And I comforted her "I'd never do that to jew!"

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: TVC15 on January 15, 2015, 12:23:36 AM

Leper Borys.

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Cerveza mas fina on January 15, 2015, 03:07:32 AM

Quote from: Green Shinobi on March 01, 2010, 03:03:05 AM

An Irish guy walks out of a bar...

+1

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Phoenix Dark on January 15, 2015, 04:55:49 PM

(http://i.imgur.com/7BptKSt.gif)

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: Joe Molotov on January 17, 2015, 12:24:37 AM

What is PD's favorite crime?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Blackmail

[close]

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: HyperZoneWasAwesome on January 17, 2015, 01:26:39 AM

what does a bear PUA say to women?

"Hey baby, whats ursine?"

Title: Re: Tell me your best joke
Post by: bud on January 17, 2015, 06:56:15 AM

it's been five years.

i've regressed so much.