THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: GilloD on August 17, 2010, 12:47:37 AM

Title: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on August 17, 2010, 12:47:37 AM: Just back from 3 weeks in the USA USA USA.

Came into work early this morning. All the electricity was off. Walked around the playground to get some fresh air. Came back- No one knows who turned the power off or why and has no idea how to fix it. Taught in the dark, old school style.

Also, some kid took a huge dump like a month ago in the bathroom. It smelled like, well, rotting poop.

When we came back to our apartment last night, it turned out that the fridge had died while we were away. It just turned into a hot, moist, rot box. I keep lots of bones (chicken, fish) in the freezer for making stock. So our freezer had like 3 inches of rotting flesh, 2 pounds of melted butter and chicken giblets in it. So gross. I have never smelled anything like that before, it literally turned my stomach. So bad.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Great Rumbler on August 17, 2010, 12:55:58 AM: :yuck
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: drozmight on August 17, 2010, 01:09:29 AM: that's god damned disgusting
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on August 17, 2010, 01:44:09 AM: Haha. My job is a joke- I just got asked to hand in a TPS (Teacher perspective situation) Report.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Mr. Gundam on August 17, 2010, 02:22:36 AM: Sounds like somebody's got a case of the Monda... oh shit, it's Tuesday there.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Barry Egan on August 17, 2010, 03:27:43 AM: Coming back to pounds of rotting flesh and shit everywhere sounds like good foreshadowing for Vol. 3 of GilloD's Korean Torture Dungeon Adventure.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on August 18, 2010, 09:30:13 PM: I just had this conversation:

"We need a picture of your scanner"
"A what? A picture of my scanner?"
"Yes. For new ID card. We need a picture of your scanner"
"Oh, a picture of me. Scanned. Like a computer picture, a JPG or whatever?"
"Yes, we need it now"
"I don't have one now. You just told me you needed one."
"Okay, but we need it now"
"I don't have one. You just told me you needed it like a minute ago"
"Yes, but please understand we need it"

It went on like this for awhile. Eventually they gave up.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Akala on August 18, 2010, 09:32:03 PM: please understand
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Great Rumbler on August 18, 2010, 10:21:59 PM: Quote from: Akala on August 18, 2010, 09:32:03 PM
please understand

It would probably get to the point that I would start punching people whenever I heard that phrase.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on August 18, 2010, 11:12:54 PM: Quote from: Akala on August 18, 2010, 09:32:03 PM
please understand

Anytime something insane or fucked up happens that's what they say. When they're like "You must come in over vacation everyday" and I say "Fuck no" they go "Please understand".
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on August 19, 2010, 12:31:59 AM: This poster has been in the subway for like 9 months:

(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_axj1XJXaIPA/TFFhnbuusTI/AAAAAAAAAFQ/wW7khiDwh4A/s1600/Photo021.jpg)
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Great Rumbler on August 19, 2010, 12:41:05 AM: Nothing about that poster makes any sense.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Brehvolution on August 19, 2010, 09:10:28 AM: :lol :lol :lol
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on September 06, 2010, 07:47:42 PM: Dynamic Korea:
"Next week you will go to new school and teach new students in afternoon, Monday-Friday"
"Wait, what? Teach them what?"
"I don't know"
"What grade level are they?"
"They didn't say"
"Where is the school?"
"I don't know yet".
"What about my other classes here?"
"They will be canceled"
"So I'm going to an unknown school to teach an unknown class to unknown students while my regular students have their classes canceled?"
"Please understand"
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Tauntaun on September 06, 2010, 08:44:58 PM: Quote from: Green Man on September 06, 2010, 07:51:42 PM
I'm going to have a shirt made that just has Please Understand written on it.

You gotta have a korean on it too. :lol

:'( GilloD
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Joe Molotov on September 07, 2010, 07:00:29 PM: Quote from: Armitage on September 07, 2010, 06:16:26 PM
Serious question, is everyone in Korea delusional?

Please understand.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: chronovore on September 08, 2010, 02:06:30 AM: Quote from: Joe Molotov® EDGE™ on September 07, 2010, 07:00:29 PM
Quote from: Armitage on September 07, 2010, 06:16:26 PM
Serious question, is everyone in Korea delusional?

Please understand.
Sounds like he understands just fine.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on September 12, 2010, 08:11:28 PM: Today:

"Workshop, today later, maybe the word has a meaning... obstacle course? What is obstacle course?"

What am I getting into?
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Joe Molotov on September 12, 2010, 08:24:42 PM: Quote from: GilloD on September 12, 2010, 08:11:28 PM
Today:

"Workshop, today later, maybe the word has a meaning... obstacle course? What is obstacle course?"

What am I getting into?

(http://img186.imageshack.us/img186/4698/sasuke20081ststage5half.jpg)
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Tauntaun on September 12, 2010, 10:35:39 PM: Quote from: Green Man on September 06, 2010, 09:41:25 PM
(http://imgur.com/lmBlO.png)

This would look so racist in real life.

:lol
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: rodi on September 13, 2010, 01:43:12 AM: I was supposed to go to Korea...

...but after reading all this, I'm kind of glad I didn't. :)
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on September 13, 2010, 08:34:40 PM: 2 updates:

1- This thing they made me go do RULES. It's basically a playground for ENglish? Like the kids play hackysack and have to use English or whatever. But there's an obstacle course and the kids have to say "Can you help me up?". I basically fucked around and threw little rubber balls on them and went down the slide for like 3 hours. Then I gave them a basketball and read under a tree. I get to do this 4 more times.

2- Our AC broke a few weeks ago. They took out the unit and brought it back a few days later good as new. However, in Korea, there's like a pipe on the outside of all AC units to keep it from dripping on the sidewalk, I guess? But to attach the pipe you have to be on the OUTSIDE of the unit. We live on the 9th floor.

Last night I'm sitting in our apartment waiting for my wife to get home when all of a sudden I hear something knocking against the AC unit. I look up and there's a fucking rope smacking it. About 2 minutes later, a guy comes down the rope. He's sitting on a fucking old piece of wood that he's tied the rope to from every corner to create a kind of swing. Let me reiterate this: There is no harness. He has like 2 paralell 2x4's that he's drilled holes in and attached ropes to. Also, this is not a climbing rope. This is just like a length of rope you get at the hardware store and it's old and fraying. He's just kind of letting himself down slowly and then he goes to work on our AC. Eventually his boss, who was on the roof, comes into our apartment, opens the window and starts handing him stuff. There's a man dangling from the roof on a fucking playground swing and this guy is handing him stuff from an open window. I've never seen anything more dangerous in my life. Then there's like a break in the action, he left a tool upstairs. So the dude dangling out our window on his little swing fumbles around in his pockets, finds his pack of smokes and lights one up. 9 stories in the air, dangling from a homemade swing, smoking a cigarette. We decide to go up the roof and see what his set up is like.

Insanely, it's as slapdash as we imagined it. There are these hooks in the roof and he just tied a couple of knots and down he goes! There's a dude up top keeping watch. So, eventually he finishes, but he can't pull himself up, so he just like lets himself down the other 9 stories, packs it all into a truck and takes off. But his buddy on the roof proceeds to do the 2nd most insane thing of the day.

There's like a 3 or 4 foot ledge on the roof. This dude, in crappy little house slippers, literally LEAPS up unto the ledge, LEANS over at like a full 90 degree angle and just starts pulling up the now slack rope. It was the balliest and possibly dumbest thing ever.

And that's how they fixed the AC.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Ganhyun on September 13, 2010, 09:10:18 PM: holy shit, lol.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on September 13, 2010, 09:27:51 PM: I took a video, I'll post it when I get home.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: BobFromPikeCreek on September 13, 2010, 11:51:54 PM: Wow.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Great Rumbler on September 14, 2010, 12:01:33 AM: [youtube=560,345]GPgTNCV0kTA[/youtube]
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: BobFromPikeCreek on September 15, 2010, 02:52:37 AM: "Remember those days we said you'd get off without vacation days? Yeah, it's 2 days before you leave for Japan and now we're telling you it's coming out of your vacation. Please understand."

Fucking Korea.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on September 15, 2010, 04:18:50 AM: Quote from: BobFromPikeCreek on September 15, 2010, 02:52:37 AM
"Remember those days we said you'd get off without vacation days? Yeah, it's 2 days before you leave for Japan and now we're telling you it's coming out of your vacation. Please understand."

Fucking Korea.

Tell them to fuck off. Next time, get it in writing. If you're not going to resign, fee free to go with 'Fuck off', though,
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: BobFromPikeCreek on September 15, 2010, 08:02:33 AM: I'm gonna cause a shitstorm tomorrow. I feel really bad dragging my sweet co-teacher into this since she's the only way I can communicate with the Principal, but giving me two days notice is just ridiculous. I don't care if they hate me at this point.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on September 17, 2010, 12:03:32 AM: I had to contact immigration to ask a Q. This is what you get at their site:

(http://www.hikorea.go.kr/images/pt/helper/1-1_en.gif)
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: chronovore on September 17, 2010, 02:52:05 AM: ^^^
Please understand.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Reb on September 17, 2010, 04:01:28 AM: Jeez, just get some member information input and get it done.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Tauntaun on September 18, 2010, 01:20:41 AM: Quote from: GilloD on September 17, 2010, 12:03:32 AM
I had to contact immigration to ask a Q. This is what you get at their site:

(http://www.hikorea.go.kr/images/pt/helper/1-1_en.gif)

wat?
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on October 04, 2010, 07:43:13 PM: So, I went to a party! Fir awhile it was awesome- You get off the subway and walk like a quarter mile and take this little access pathway down under the bridge/highway. It's a HUGE bridge, not like a little wood thing over a creek. It's like Brooklyn Bridge sized, although about 700 times less lovely. But because it's so huge, there's like a massive overhang and you could hold like 500 people there.

WHen I first get there there is a generator going and someone is showing a movie like WAY down the tunnel under the bridge- Apparently the tunnel goes to the sewer. So it's kind of creepy, watching FAUST from like 500 feet away in a sewer tunnel. But also really neat. The kids have painted these monster grafitti pieces on the huge tunnel walls and they've hung these monster-sized paper airplanes from the bridge, and people have huge sculpture pieces just sitting in the tunnel and while it's kind of twee or whatever, it's also really impressive and neat and everyone is super fucking nice and not stuck up and someone introduces me to Jay Electronica who is just kind of hanging out and having a good time and everything is going well.

Then the generator goes out. No problem, some folks head a ways down the tunnel and light like 100 candles which is alsmost way cooler. Someone else goes to get gas for the generator. Folks are still just hanging out,m doing what party people do and then there's like this smell. And one by one the rows of candles start to go out in the distance.

Everyone stops talking for a few minutes and gets real quiet because no one really knows what's going on. And all of a sudden the sculptures start to move. Because what no one thought about was that it was raining. And like all major cities, Seoul, when it rains, flushes it's sewers out into the Han River. And things go from silence to pandemonium as everyone starts grabbing whatever shit they can hold on to and making a break for it- There is now a torrent of 5 foot deep sewer water rushing towards the party.

I was like knee deep in it, drunk enough to not notice, pulling amps and shit out. People are like scrambling up the hill. At this point the cops have arrived and are just laughing their asses off at the white kids who thought it'd be fun to party in the sewer access tunnel. They leave, people are alternately amused and distraught depending on your level of investment. We go to another party, smelling like a sewer. T END.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Barry Egan on October 04, 2010, 08:39:59 PM: amazing :lol
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Fresh Prince on October 04, 2010, 08:54:52 PM: GilloD :bow2
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on October 04, 2010, 09:13:10 PM: Haha. This same night, there was like a new promo trailer for this beer that just came out called HITE D. And if you waited on like, they gave you snap bracelets. Then you got to go into the trailer. Inside, 2 bikini babes poured you like. 1/4 cup of beer and they asked "Do you rike it?" and if you said "Yes!" then all these lights came and they started shouting like YEAH WOOOOOOOOOO and they pulled a whole,. fresh beer out of a hidden fridge and then took your picture and showed it on this like 30 foot TV outside and when you left the trailer with everyone cheering there was a big puff of smoke and confetti and because you can drink on the street you have a free beer in your hand.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Fresh Prince on October 04, 2010, 09:47:04 PM: It sounds like someone actually rikes Korea.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Joe Molotov on October 04, 2010, 09:50:54 PM: Quote from: GilloD on October 04, 2010, 09:13:10 PM
Inside, 2 bikini babes poured you like. 1/4 cup of beer and they asked "Do you rike it?"

:lol
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: BobFromPikeCreek on October 05, 2010, 02:02:23 AM: Ah man, I was told that party was canceled.

Edit: Oh hahahaha. I just read the post. Yes, it was canceled. Whatever.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Reb on October 05, 2010, 10:29:47 AM: Quote from: GilloD on October 04, 2010, 09:13:10 PM
Haha. This same night, there was like a new promo trailer for this beer that just came out called HITE D. And if you waited on like, they gave you snap bracelets. Then you got to go into the trailer. Inside, 2 bikini babes poured you like. 1/4 cup of beer and they asked "Do you rike it?" and if you said "Yes!" then all these lights came and they started shouting like YEAH WOOOOOOOOOO and they pulled a whole,. fresh beer out of a hidden fridge and then took your picture and showed it on this like 30 foot TV outside and when you left the trailer with everyone cheering there was a big puff of smoke and confetti and because you can drink on the street you have a free beer in your hand.

So awesome!
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: chronovore on October 06, 2010, 02:50:07 AM: Quote from: BobFromPikeCreek on October 05, 2010, 02:02:23 AM
Ah man, I was told that party was canceled.

Edit: Oh hahahaha. I just read the post. Yes, it was canceled. Whatever.

CANCELED BY MOTHER NATURE.
spoiler (click to show/hide)
Or canceled BY THE CALL OF MOTHER NATURE.
[close]
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on October 15, 2010, 09:27:13 PM: ALso, I talked to the MOST INSANE MAN EVER last night. We met this dude in the market a few weeks ago, a cool white guy, he looked kind of Brooklyn-disheveled etc etc., like a dude I might get along with. Last night he joined us at the bar and he turned out to be A- THe biggest fucking asshole of all time and B- Completely bonkers.

So he starts telling us how like. The internet, and having a website, is all about promotion and how promotion is this disgusting instinc that needs to be wiped off the face of the planet and how he made this nFUSION BLUES ROCK ALBUM with buddhist bells and Japanese donkey braying and Turkish eggshell rustlers and all this shit and he just has 0 tolerance for anyone else's opinon. He callled Mary and ignorant bitch- He was talking abot how he wanted to start a music commune that anyone could join, except not everyone would be allowed, just people that he liekd and on and on and on.

After a few more drinks I was the only person left tsalking to this guy. One, I felt bad for him. Two, I couldn't wait to see what crazy thing came spilling out of his mouth next. I struck GOLD. He eventually revealed to me- in the bathroom, in a hushed voice- that a shadowy cabal had planned 9/11 TWO HUNDRED YEARS AGO. Further, as of last year, this cabal has banned the sale of garlic and ginger in EUrope, there are mass riots, but the news won't report them. When I asked him what garlic had to do with 9/11, he smiled and said, verbatim, "Connect the dots, man".

Spread the word. I told him it sounded cooky town and he was like THEY WANT YOU TO THINK ITS COOKY TOWN. OPEN YOUR EYES.

Here are the two things he asked me to look up/. They are both Kooky: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bilderberg_Group http://www.natural-health-information-centre.com/codex-alimentarius.html
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: chronovore on October 15, 2010, 09:32:39 PM: I hate running into those guys in isolated foreign spots like Japan and Korea. You just KNOW they talk to the locals, who then proceed to think that it's normal for foreigners to be completely batshit crazy.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on November 08, 2010, 08:06:03 PM: My Co-Teach/Advocate (The new VP speaks absolutely 0 English. Like none. Not even "Hi") said that the Vice Principal thinks we should have a month of camp and that all camps should be taught WITHOUT co-teachers, so that they can teach another camp.

He also said that no one should take more than 2 days of vacation in a row. I wanted to take 20.

We'll see. I'm phsyched to get the heck out of here next Summer.

Also, new quote: "Many Korean dont takeee vacation, so when you want go trip, it is very strangee to us".

jdhjdfhfdkfdshjfdhjkdfsnbm.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Fresh Prince on November 08, 2010, 08:25:13 PM: That needs to become an emoticon.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on November 08, 2010, 10:24:58 PM: Oh god. She said it. "Please understand, vacation is difficult" and I almost killed her on the spot. PLEASE UNDERSTAND MY FIST.

I hope that's like a snappy catch phrase in that game HOMELAND or whatever it is.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on November 08, 2010, 11:05:28 PM: ‎"So on Friday, before, you have day off. But now, Vice Principal say- You must come in." "Will anyone else be here?" "No, no student, no teacher. Just you and cleaning man"

Also, this little gem: "So, camp must be 3 weeks. he is angry! But also, vacation now short by 6 days, so you can only have 10 day free to take vacation"

Apparently it's this way for everyone now. Let's put a stake in it: The Korean ESL Gold Rush is over.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on November 09, 2010, 01:19:33 AM: fml:

My projector breaks in the middle of my lesson for the 4th time since I've been here. I leave the kids to run riot while I go print a worksheet. Printer is out of ink. Shake the toner cart. Get a shitty copy out of the printer. Go to make copies. Copier jams. Fix copier.

Out of toner.

:(
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: chronovore on November 09, 2010, 07:03:50 AM: ABANDON COUNTRY.

Why the hell are you in Korea instead of Japan, anyway? Korea is just pretending to have the boom economy of Japan in the '80s. Japan is pretending that it's -not- recovering.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: BobFromPikeCreek on November 09, 2010, 11:48:57 AM: Same same. Our projector is dead, which is a nightmare for me since PPTs are basically all I've got. Also, our copier basically exploded. It was fucked. The paper tray started sucking paper in faster and faster and faster until smoke started coming out of the thing and it stopped working. No PPTs, no worksheets. Fuck.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Mr. Gundam on November 09, 2010, 03:20:27 PM: GilloD needs a shirt that says "PLEASE UNDERSTAND." on it.

Hint hint, Secret Santa.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on November 09, 2010, 06:36:43 PM: Quote from: BobFromPikeCreek on November 09, 2010, 11:48:57 AM
Same same. Our projector is dead, which is a nightmare for me since PPTs are basically all I've got. Also, our copier basically exploded. It was fucked. The paper tray started sucking paper in faster and faster and faster until smoke started coming out of the thing and it stopped working. No PPTs, no worksheets. Fuck.

I thought I fixed ours, but it just died again. Yesterday I had this talk:

"I cleaned out the projectors. I think there was too much dust in the filter"
"Oh, maybe that is why it said 'Clean Filter' in Korean!"
"Why didn't you say anything?"
"It was in Korean"
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Akala on November 09, 2010, 07:11:01 PM: that sounds awesome to me!
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Tauntaun on November 09, 2010, 11:05:47 PM: (http://imgur.com/lmBlO.png)
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on December 02, 2010, 12:53:19 AM: "This year instead of 2 week English camp, we do 3 week okay"
(I have to, it's in my contract. )
"Fine. How many hours?"
"Last year, maybe 2. But this year, 4 and you do by yourself"
"Wait, so 60 lessons?"
"Yes and all lesson plans are handing in tommorrow"
"That's not possible. It's literally not possible to do 60 lesson plans by tommorrow"
"Maybe you copy from this government book"

They hand me a book put out by the government of suggested English camp names: "love love English time", "Global rising angel camp", "FUN PET HAPPY TIME", "Yummy Happy", "Just speaking English" and "Outline of global 21 talents camp"
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on December 02, 2010, 01:01:03 AM: The list of suggested activities is even worse:

"BEATIFUL SWITZERLAND"
"BOMBS"
"PICK UP A HORSESHOE AND THROW IT AT A BAR"

With no clarification at all.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: BobFromPikeCreek on December 02, 2010, 06:20:59 AM: :rofl

I have to plan a total of 3 lessons for winter camp.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Great Rumbler on December 02, 2010, 10:21:13 AM: Quote from: GilloD on December 02, 2010, 01:01:03 AM
The list of suggested activities is even worse:

"BOMBS"

:rofl
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: chronovore on December 02, 2010, 10:29:47 AM: Your guys Korea experience makes some Alice in Wonderland passages seem dreary.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Tauntaun on December 02, 2010, 12:44:31 PM: Quote from: GilloD on December 02, 2010, 12:53:19 AM
"This year instead of 2 week English camp, we do 3 week okay"
(I have to, it's in my contract. )
"Fine. How many hours?"
"Last year, maybe 2. But this year, 4 and you do by yourself"
"Wait, so 60 lessons?"
"Yes and all lesson plans are handing in tommorrow"
"That's not possible. It's literally not possible to do 60 lesson plans by tommorrow"
"Maybe you copy from this government book"

They hand me a book put out by the government of suggested English camp names: "love love English time", "Global rising angel camp", "FUN PET HAPPY TIME", "Yummy Happy", "Just speaking English" and "Outline of global 21 talents camp"

Quote from: GilloD on December 02, 2010, 01:01:03 AM
The list of suggested activities is even worse:

"BEATIFUL SWITZERLAND"
"BOMBS"
"PICK UP A HORSESHOE AND THROW IT AT A BAR"

With no clarification at all.

:kylielaff :kylielaff :kylielaff :kylielaff
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on December 02, 2010, 07:56:18 PM: My 3rd grade kids all failed their tests because the test was a list of 12 words that never actually appear in the cirriculum and no one told me to teach them. Good jon!
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Mr. Gundam on December 02, 2010, 08:06:31 PM: But GilloD, please understand...
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on December 02, 2010, 08:37:24 PM: Thx for this bit of toxic Friday: I'm teaching by myself because co-teach has to 'test', but she's backed up, so I have like 60 3rd graders in the room at the same time, all by myself. Moderately hilarious!
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Mr. Gundam on December 02, 2010, 08:52:58 PM: You need to teach all of your kids "Please understand" and how to use it in every single situation when challenged by authority.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Tauntaun on December 02, 2010, 09:18:51 PM: Quote from: Mr. Gundam on December 02, 2010, 08:52:58 PM
You need to teach all of your kids "Please understand" and how to use it in every single situation when challenged by authority.

This! :bow
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on December 03, 2010, 12:41:47 AM: I dropped an A-Bomb on this class today. They made this girl cry and then as she was crying they were pelting her with books. She's like the best student in a class full of morons. I went full Hulk Rage I was like "HOW DARE YOU! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU LITTLE ANIMALS THAT YOU TREAT EACH OTHER SO BADLY! YOU LIVE NEXT TO A COUNTRY THAT WANTS TO OBLITERATE YOU AND YOU STILL CANT BE KIND TO EACH OTHER. YOU. ARE. ANIMALS." and at this point they' 3rd grade kids and I like never yell. I'm usually a funny party clown as long as the kids are being chill. But now I have like 10 of them crying and this one girl, who was the one throwing stuff, was like "TEACHER WE SORRY STOP YELL STOP YELL WE SORRY TEACHER" and then I kept going for another 5 minutes.

Totally awesome. Lots of tears. Probably the last time they'll try and pull that stunt again
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Barry Egan on December 03, 2010, 12:45:13 AM: Fuck yeah! :rock :rock :rock
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Great Rumbler on December 03, 2010, 12:48:29 AM: :bow GilloD :bow2
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on December 03, 2010, 01:26:45 AM: I think it was really terrifying because as long as kids are in their seats and stuff I really like to joke around and make funny faces and do stupid dances. But today they were just like tear assing around and making each other cry and my co-teacher was fuck knows where, so I had to bring out THE HAMMER.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: CrystalGemini on December 03, 2010, 07:15:00 AM: Quote from: Green Man on September 06, 2010, 09:41:25 PM
(http://imgur.com/lmBlO.png)

This would look so racist in real life.

:lol Reminds me of:
(http://theeestory.com/files/If_you_aint_white.JPG)
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Mr. Gundam on December 03, 2010, 11:21:12 AM: Quote from: GilloD on December 03, 2010, 12:41:47 AM
YOU LIVE NEXT TO A COUNTRY THAT WANTS TO OBLITERATE YOU AND YOU STILL CANT BE KIND TO EACH OTHER.

This is the best part. Good job, man.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Joe Molotov on December 03, 2010, 08:16:06 PM: Quote from: GilloD
That's it, I'm taking off mah belt.
/
/
(http://i.imgur.com/gSSfB.jpg)
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on December 15, 2010, 07:52:58 PM: Some kid just showed me a bunch of boils on his hand and kept saying "Oh I'm sick-uh velly velly sick-uh". I think he has Bubonic Plague.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on December 15, 2010, 07:54:09 PM: Also, yesterday they told me we were going on a culture field trip. I was kinda like Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu but then we went to the ritzy theater. Tickets were $40, but my school paid. I got to watch Harry Potter in a leather recliner. There was a touch screen and you picked something out on the touch screen and then a waitress would bring it you, gratis. Fucking ruled.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Tauntaun on December 15, 2010, 09:21:04 PM: Quote from: GilloD on December 15, 2010, 07:54:09 PM
Also, yesterday they told me we were going on a culture field trip. I was kinda like Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu but then we went to the ritzy theater. Tickets were $40, but my school paid. I got to watch Harry Potter in a leather recliner. There was a touch screen and you picked something out on the touch screen and then a waitress would bring it you, gratis. Fucking ruled.

:lol Awesome.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: BobFromPikeCreek on December 15, 2010, 10:13:11 PM: I can't believe you signed on for a second year in this place.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on December 16, 2010, 01:26:19 AM: Quote from: BobFromPikeCreek on December 15, 2010, 10:13:11 PM
I can't believe you signed on for a second year in this place.

It's still better than "Have 8 hours a day to waste away and question your self worth while slowly going broke in an office cubicle"

That said, it's also silly and insane
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on December 16, 2010, 07:44:18 PM: I have 0 enthusiasm left for this year. 7 days.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on December 16, 2010, 10:06:39 PM: My classes are 40 minutes. In my last class, after like 20 minutes, the kids just all got up and left and my co-teacher just watched. When they were gone, my co-teacher was like "Whyd di you dismiss them so early?" and I was like "I didn't! They all got up and wouldn't come back and you let them leave" and she says "Ohhhhhh, I thought maybe you are telling them to go early. That is bad teaching"

What the fuck. Did ytou hear me say "Okay, class is over!". No, I said "Hey, wait, come back, come -"
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on December 27, 2010, 01:36:43 AM: Okay, so:

This time of year there are no classes. There's only "English Camp" aka "Day Care". Last year I did 2 weeks of camp and I got to leave at 12, when camp was over.

This year there was a big struggle because he wanted me to do a MONTH of camp, which would leave me with 1 week to take a vacation. I told him to fuck off, we got it down to 3 weeks and juggled things around so I could swing a 3 week vay-cay.

Then they wanted me to do 4 classes a day instead of 2. I told them to fuck off and we got it down to 2.

Today I come in and camp is fine. We blow through it, it's pretty fun. I have the kids decorate snowmen and make teams and learn some new words and shit.

At 12, they all leave. I go downstairs and no one is leaving. The following occurs:

"We cannot go home because Vice Principal did not come to work"
"So why don't we leave?"
"Because he didn't tell us to leave"
"So we can't leave because someone who didn't come to work isn't here to tell us to leave?"
"Please understand"

Around 2:30 they finally call the VP at his house. He says that not only do we have to stay here, we should all stay until 5.

Let me tell you why this is fucking stupid: There are no students here. There is no work to do. I have to prepare tomorrow's lesson, but I don't have Microsoft office on my work machine. I have some shitty Korean HANGOUL OFFICE-U MAKE-U bullshit. It's completely in Korean and crashes every 40 seconds. I have to go home to do work. But I can't. Because I have to sit here.

I'm leaving at 4:30. My contract says I work 8 hours, 8:30-4:30. Camp starts at 9, I need 30 minutes of prep to photocopy and cut and set up and everything. If they want, I'll come in at 9 and start camp half an hour late.

Fuck these fucking morons. These people are unimaginably stupid.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Great Rumbler on December 27, 2010, 01:54:16 AM: Quote from: GilloD on December 27, 2010, 01:36:43 AM
"We cannot go home because Vice Principal did not come to work"
"So why don't we leave?"
"Because he didn't tell us to leave"
"So we can't leave because someone who didn't come to work isn't here to tell us to leave?"
"Please understand"

No conversation of this nature has EVER occurred in the United States. Not once.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: BobFromPikeCreek on December 27, 2010, 03:27:00 AM: Quote from: Great Rumbler on December 27, 2010, 01:54:16 AM
Quote from: GilloD on December 27, 2010, 01:36:43 AM
"We cannot go home because Vice Principal did not come to work"
"So why don't we leave?"
"Because he didn't tell us to leave"
"So we can't leave because someone who didn't come to work isn't here to tell us to leave?"
"Please understand"

No conversation of this nature has EVER occurred in the United States. Not once.

But the thing is in the states everyone who was victim to this would agree this was stupid. Koreans are brainless robots who think whatever their employer says is divine scripture.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Great Rumbler on December 27, 2010, 03:52:52 AM: I wasn't making a point that his story isn't uncommon, I meant exactly what I said. No American's gonna hang around when the boss is gone and there's no work to be done!
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: BobFromPikeCreek on December 27, 2010, 03:59:49 AM: Ok, so we're on the same page. Koreans are dumb dumbs.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on January 03, 2011, 07:53:44 PM: Sitting here until 4:30 everyday is killing me. Today:

"I'm just going to go home at 12:30 when camp is over"
"Oh no, you can't"
"WHy not? The VP doesn't even come to work. We are the only people here"
"But maybe he will call"
"So tell him I left"
"Then he will be angry"

Its like the fucking Wizard of Oz, everyone is terrified of the great Oz. He doesn't fucking exist! Fuck it, I'm going out to lunch and not coming back.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on January 03, 2011, 08:10:56 PM: I'm spending an enormous amount of time, anger and energy picking fights on the Korean teachers forum while my kids slave over worksheets
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: BobFromPikeCreek on January 03, 2011, 08:51:31 PM: THIS IS OUR WORKING TIME WE MUST WORK DURING WORKING TIME
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on January 06, 2011, 12:32:45 AM: http://vimeo.com/user3428534/videos/sort:date

My wife had her kids remake famous American movies.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: chronovore on January 06, 2011, 01:36:22 AM: Quote from: GilloD on January 06, 2011, 12:32:45 AM
http://vimeo.com/user3428534/videos/sort:date

My wife had her kids remake famous American movies.

Yeah, that Zoolander one is pretty cute.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on February 15, 2011, 08:38:19 PM: So Saturday I busted my ankle. The way I busted my ankle was in the process of doing something hilarious and maybe illegal (Is it against the law to cross into a business that's open by entering from the roof from another roof?). So I took 2 days off work to heal up. I really shouldn't be walking yet, but if I take 3 days off I have to get a note from the Hospital. Koreans LOVE TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL. If you have a sniffle they'll be like: "Did you go to the hospital?" and I'm like "No" and they're like "GO TO THE HOSPITAL".

So I hobble to work this morning looking like a crazy man (My shoe wouldn't fit my swollen foot, so I wore one shoe and one slipper) and make a joke out of it. I drew a bite mark on my arm and told all my kids I was a zombie and chased them around for awhile. So it eventually transpires that I have no class today or the rest of the week. Wow, good thing I showed up, right? So I decide to just sit at my desk and screw around for the rest of the day.

I do this for about 40 minutes when they come to my desk and tell me "We must go stamping. Many stamps, okay?" and I'm like "But my foot is fuuuu" and they're like "Principal make request lets go" and because I'm a pussy I was like "FINE WHATEVER". So we go upstairs into this SWELTERING OFFICE and there is a comically huge stack of paper. It's the largest stack of paper I've ever seen outside of a movie about HOW TERRIBLE OFFICE WORK IS. It's probably close to a thousand sheets of paper. It's huge. And they sit me down at a table and they're like "Here's a rubber stamp, stamp every page". I figure I'll just put my back into it and bust it out and so I start stamping these pages.

I get like maybe 200 pages done and my, uh, handler, who is standing over my shoulder tut-tutting me everytime a stamp is mis-aligned, is like "Ohhhh red ink no good. blue! blue ink" and hands me a blue stamp pad. We eventually work it out that I will not be the one to restamp the previous 200 or so pages. I power through the rest (The Koreans keep holding a pow wow about whether or not a stamp is good enough, aligned enough or whatever. There's a whole invisible field of criteria I'm not privvy to). It takes like an hour but I bust through the whole stack and then there's this gem:

"Starting with tomorrow, is Spring Vacation. How many vacation days do you want?"
"Uh. All of them?"
"Well, you dont have many vacation days left"
"Right, but it's Spring Vacation"
"No,no. Take take vacation, you must use vacation days. Otherwise you will come in"
"Who else will be here?"
"No other peoples. This is school keeper's phone number. When you come in morning, call him and he will come and unlock school for you to sit"

6 months.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Great Rumbler on February 15, 2011, 10:56:51 PM: Quote
(Is it against the law to cross into a business that's open by entering from the roof from another roof?)

What? :rofl

Quote
"Starting with tomorrow, is Spring Vacation. How many vacation days do you want?"
"Uh. All of them?"
"Well, you dont have many vacation days left"
"Right, but it's Spring Vacation"
"No,no. Take take vacation, you must use vacation days. Otherwise you will come in"
"Who else will be here?"
"No other peoples. This is school keeper's phone number. When you come in morning, call him and he will come and unlock school for you to sit"

My God.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Corporal on February 15, 2011, 11:05:18 PM: So wait, they're paying you to go to your empty office, sit down and play DS, PSP, watch porn on your laptop, boobytrap the office supplies and rub your testicles all over the principals' favourite teacup or whatever?

Without a single soul to supervise you?

If I were one of the co-workers in a situation like that, I'd be scared. Very, very scared (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=My5BQTKsa0w#t=5m28s).
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Ganhyun on February 19, 2011, 10:31:29 AM: GilloD, I just want you to know that your stories of Krazy Korea are one of the things that keep me coming back to EB.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: Boogie on February 19, 2011, 10:54:58 AM: Quote from: Green Man on January 06, 2011, 01:02:39 AM
Quote from: GilloD on January 06, 2011, 12:32:45 AM
http://vimeo.com/user3428534/videos/sort:date

My wife had her kids remake famous American movies.

Your wife is so cool, GilloD.

Zoolander remake is the best.

No way, the Super Trooper one is the best. The kid counting the "meows" :rofl
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on February 21, 2011, 09:05:26 PM: I feel like I have my own studio. I come in at like 10, play Civ, do some work and leave at 2. Fucking rules. Real school starts again next Wednesday :(
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: chronovore on February 21, 2011, 11:09:14 PM: I think if I was left to my own devices in your situation, I'd become king-god of Team Fortress 2 or L4D.

I might also use my scrot as a scrub brush for the principal's coffee mug.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: BobFromPikeCreek on February 22, 2011, 10:06:26 PM: Haha, oh man. They've blocked Facebook here and rearranged the office so the foreign teacher is cramped on a tiny fold-out table in the middle of the room where everyone can see exactly what they're doing. Also, the kettle is now on top of my computer.

My replacement's gonna have fun.
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: GilloD on February 23, 2011, 05:39:34 AM: LAst year they were like YOUR OFFICE IS TOO SMALL so they knocked down wall and converted part of the library into a bigger office. hen they added 4 more people so it was more cramped than before.

They blocked FB here for awhile, this lady got up and gave a speech at an Open Class and was like "Too many foreign teacher wastee time at workee! No more Facebook!" and someone was like "But our co-teachers spend all day on GMarket (Korean Ebay)!" and the lady as like "BUT THAT SITE IS KOREAN AND GOOD FOR WORKING. USA SITE NO GOOD AND MAKE LAZY" but then like 3 weeks later FB was back. GO fgure
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: lennedsay on February 23, 2011, 10:33:59 AM: :rofl This thread has kept me entertained while I spend $650 at the mechanic... :maf
Title: Re: Krazy Korea Semester 3 START
Post by: chronovore on February 23, 2011, 11:16:08 AM: This thread keeps me entertained while in Japan. Korea makes Japan seem absolutely stolid.