THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: Ecrofirt on December 26, 2006, 07:46:22 PM

Title: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Ecrofirt on December 26, 2006, 07:46:22 PM: And you can too!

OK, so I thought I made good steaks before. Yea, ok, I thought my steaks were pretty awesome. I was fucking WRONG.

Jesus, they were good, but not like super fantastic great. Super fantastic great is like melt-in-your-mouth-and-make-your-dick-hard great. TBS can probably tell you about super fantastic great; he'd no doubt compare it to styling on a motherfucker with his cal on or some shit while simultaneously being half passed-out drunk on a white guy's couch with his pants around his ankles and sucking his large Italian friend's cock.

Anyway, I'm rambling, no doubt to tasty fucklord steak in my stomach.

My mom surprised me with a heavy iron skillet for christmas that I've been eying up for the past few months. Naturally, I thawed one of my deluxe rib eye motherfuckers today and got to cooking. Good lord, it was like I was eating a piece of heaven. No lie, it felt like I had a piece of life-ever-after in my mouth, and it was tasty and delicious.

So the steak was simple to make, and tasty as all motherfuck. You need:
One 12-ounce rib eye. Mine was about 1 inch think or so.
Some salt, pepper, and cajun spice
A fresh lemon for juice

To Cook:
Heat your skillet on your stove to medium-high heat. You'll know it's ready when white paper turns brown if placed inside.
(https://secure.lodgemfg.com/storefront/storeimages/%7B8ED9580D-E24F-4ED1-A14A-31BBAA7350FD%7D_010_L9TB3_lg.jpg) (https://secure.lodgemfg.com/storefront/product1.asp?menu=logic&idProduct=3939)

While skillet is heating, take your rib eye
(http://img133.imageshack.us/img133/6721/ribeyemcbmaggieoqx7.jpg)
And sprinkle it lightly with salt and pepper on one side. Season it with cajun spice so there's a light coating covering the same side as the salt and pepper, and then squeeze some lemon juice onto it. Add enough for some flavor, but don't drown it with lemon.

When the skillet is ready, place the steak into it seasoning side down. Let it cook for 5 minutes without moving it.
While it's cooking, repeat the seasoning step above.
After the 5 minutes of cooking, flip the steak, and cook for 4 minutes.

The steak should be rare/medium rare depending on thickness.

Serves: 1 hungry motherfucker.

Enjoy.

Sorry I don't have any pictures of the steak, but I devoured that sonofabitch. It was gone in a 90 seconds or so, and I had a giant grin on my face.
Title: Re: Jesus fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Mupepe on December 26, 2006, 07:47:43 PM: Oh hell yeah. I can make the best baked chicken ever. I'll post a recipe later
Title: Re: Jesus fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Bacon on December 26, 2006, 07:56:33 PM: Cooking steaks on the stove is gay.
Title: Re: Jesus fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Mupepe on December 26, 2006, 08:00:48 PM: Quote from: Bacon on December 26, 2006, 07:56:33 PM
Cooking steaks on the stove is gay.
Are you implying that real men use grills?

And are you implying that my man Ecro is not a real man?

IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE IMPLYING!?

Edit: and Ecro, it's "Jesus Titty Fucking Christ."
Title: Re: Jesus fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Ecrofirt on December 26, 2006, 08:02:15 PM: Quote from: Bacon on December 26, 2006, 07:56:33 PM
Cooking steaks on the stove is gay.

Cooking a steak in an iron skillet isn't like cooking it on the stove with a regular frying pan AT ALL.

Frying is a moist-heat method, and occurs when you're using a regular frypan. When you use a skillet like the one pictured above, you're cooking using dry heat. There's no oil or fat added to the pan, and any liquid fat from the steak is drained off.

The difference in taste is night and day, and the two methods can't be compared at all. When you cook using a skillet, you're ending up with the same method (or one very similiar) that's used in restaurants.
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Bacon on December 26, 2006, 08:03:49 PM: I cook mine on a charcoal grill.
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Ecrofirt on December 26, 2006, 08:04:56 PM: Quote from: Bacon on December 26, 2006, 08:03:49 PM
I cook mine on a charcoal grill.

We have a charcoal grill. We don't use it in the winter, though. And I dare say, this is better than any steak I've grilled.
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Mupepe on December 26, 2006, 08:05:40 PM: Quote from: Bacon on December 26, 2006, 08:03:49 PM
I cook mine on a charcoal grill.
I wash myself with a rag on a stick.

Nice title change, Ecro. :D
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: The Fake Shemp on December 27, 2006, 12:54:53 AM: CG makes the best steaks ever :-*
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: TVC15 on December 27, 2006, 01:35:31 AM: I concur with Ecro, skillet cooking is the shit.

Is it just me or is it seeing something of a resurgence as of late?
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Ecrofirt on December 27, 2006, 02:49:59 AM: Quote from: Willco on December 27, 2006, 12:54:53 AM
CG makes the best steaks ever :-*

On the contrary, I heard she loves your tubesteak.
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Phoenix Dark on December 27, 2006, 03:08:05 AM: Interesting. I have a skillet so I'll try this. Living by myself means I have to cook my own stuff a lot.

Mupepe hurry up and post your recipe
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Mupepe on December 27, 2006, 01:28:15 PM: Quote from: Phoenix Dark on December 27, 2006, 03:08:05 AM
Interesting. I have a skillet so I'll try this. Living by myself means I have to cook my own stuff a lot.

Mupepe hurry up and post your recipe
lolz I forgot about it last night.

Get some chicken breast WITH skin.
Get salt, pepper, lemon and soy sauce
Get a baking pan with foil.

Coat the foil with grease. Get a napkin or something and put some grease on it and just lightly coat the foil.

Cut a slit in the piece of chicken and squeeze some lemon into it. Then put on some salt and pepper. NOT A LOT.

Set the oven for 400 and let it preheat.

Throw the chicken in.

Wait about 5 to 7 minutes and baste the chicken with some soy sauce.

Let it cook for about 5 to 7 more minutes and flip it and baste with soy sauce.

Now just keep checking until its cooked in and out. Probably about another 10 minutes.

Take it out and enjoy. The lemon gives it awesome flavor on the inside and the soy sauce makes the outside flavorful. so awesome.
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: OnkelC on December 27, 2006, 02:26:38 PM: Nice preparation, Ecrofirt. The addition of lemon juice is an interesting idea. I usually spice steaks with salt, pepper and a hint of sugar to enhance browning. Here are some examples:

(http://i73.photobucket.com/albums/i216/OnkelC/PepperedSteak/smallCIMG3796.jpg)

(http://i73.photobucket.com/albums/i216/OnkelC/PepperedSteak/smallCIMG3798.jpg)

(http://i73.photobucket.com/albums/i216/OnkelC/PepperedSteak/smallCIMG3803.jpg)
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Ecrofirt on December 27, 2006, 02:31:27 PM: Tasty.
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: muckhole on December 27, 2006, 02:51:01 PM: Sonofabitch!!

Why did I come into this thread....I leave for work in 20 minutes, with steak on the mind, and all I've got to look forward to tonight is a crappy toasted bagel.

STEAK!
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: OnkelC on December 27, 2006, 02:54:21 PM: Bagels are great.
spoiler (click to show/hide)
...with a Steak filling!
(http://i73.photobucket.com/albums/i216/OnkelC/SteakSandwich/smallCIMG1489.jpg) lol
[close]
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: muckhole on December 27, 2006, 03:03:57 PM: Now, see, that's just mean.
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Phoenix Dark on December 28, 2006, 04:21:23 PM: Hey guys

I have a bag of frozen chicken wings in the freezer. Any good tips on cooking them?

I usually put them in a glass pan, sprinkle salt/light pepper/various spices over both sides of the wings and then cook them for about an hour and 20 minutes
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Phoenix Dark on December 28, 2006, 04:23:03 PM: And OMG how did you cook that corn?
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Ecrofirt on December 28, 2006, 06:34:59 PM: Quote from: Phoenix Dark on December 28, 2006, 04:21:23 PM
Hey guys

I have a bag of frozen chicken wings in the freezer. Any good tips on cooking them?

I usually put them in a glass pan, sprinkle salt/light pepper/various spices over both sides of the wings and then cook them for about an hour and 20 minutes

Season them with a ton of cajun spice. Place them in the middle of the oven, and broil them on a low setting. Season and turn as needed.

This will take awhile, but the wings will be crispy and delicious.
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Ecrofirt on December 30, 2006, 01:22:45 AM: I made another one today, and I remembered to take pics this time!

These will go in chronological order from beginning to end.
spoiler (click to show/hide)
(http://www.nformant.net/evilbore/12-30-steak/0.jpg)
The crazy eyes were done on purpose for effect. OA be damned, I'm posting this picture!
[close]
(http://www.nformant.net/evilbore/12-30-steak/1.jpg)
(http://www.nformant.net/evilbore/12-30-steak/2.jpg)
Cooking to perfection!

(http://www.nformant.net/evilbore/12-30-steak/3.jpg)
(http://www.nformant.net/evilbore/12-30-steak/4.jpg)
(http://www.nformant.net/evilbore/12-30-steak/5.jpg)
(http://www.nformant.net/evilbore/12-30-steak/6.jpg)
(http://www.nformant.net/evilbore/12-30-steak/7.jpg)
Oh no, the last bite!
spoiler (click to show/hide)
(http://www.nformant.net/evilbore/12-30-steak/8.jpg)
It was a happy ending.
[close]
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: MrAngryFace on December 30, 2006, 01:24:56 AM: God this threads kinda bizzare
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Ecrofirt on December 30, 2006, 01:26:01 AM: Quote from: MrAngryFace on December 30, 2006, 01:24:56 AM
God this threads kinda bizzare

HOW BIZARRE HOW BIZARRE
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Mupepe on December 30, 2006, 01:26:26 AM: :rofl :rofl

That steak looked awesome
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: MrAngryFace on December 30, 2006, 01:27:44 AM: howww bizzare
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Ecrofirt on December 30, 2006, 01:29:31 AM: I love it when some steak juice dribbles itself into my troll beard.
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: CrystalGemini on December 30, 2006, 06:51:22 AM: Holy cow this thread is so awesome. :dur
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: OnkelC on December 30, 2006, 03:59:33 PM: That is one fine looking steak. Congratulations.
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Christopher on December 30, 2006, 04:21:45 PM: Blah you need to cook it, it's still pink, I can't eat steak like that :o
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: MrAngryFace on December 31, 2006, 02:56:36 AM: Steak needs teh pink for full flavor. Plus overcooking meat PROMOTES CANCER.
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Phoenix Dark on December 31, 2006, 03:30:54 AM: There's middle ground between overcooking and eating minstrel meat :-X
Title: Re: Jesus titty-fucking christ, I make the best steaks ever.
Post by: Ecrofirt on December 31, 2006, 03:51:18 AM: That steak was clearly cooked. It was cooked a total of 9 minutes, which produced a rare steak, and you can see the outside is thoroughly cooked, while the inside is pink. It was even very warm on the inside, so it wasn't even really 'rare'.