My wife's mom is telling my kids if I vote for Obama, I'm not allowed at their house anymore. Her sister said to them that if Obama is re-elected, they won't get any xmas presents since she will have to start paying for other peoples health care.
Fucking leave my kids out of your delusion! Even if they are joking, my kids think they are serious.
I haven't had a chance to speak with either of them yet, but they will get a piece of my mind.
My father has a tendency to think he's always in the right, even when he's dead wrong and that everyone else is the cause of this suffering. Not him.
So this morning I wake up and I'm making eggs for breakfast like usual, and he talks about how the family computer is fucked up. I'm like, yeah...spyware and probably malware. I'll take care of it. Then he asks if it's something I dled, because obviously everything I dl is evil and contains a virus, to which I reply,"No, I rarely get viruses, and I know how to prevent them" "I didn't ask you that, what is spyware? Anyways, change the homepage back" "the spyware did that, that's what it does" "I didn't ask you that" "I just told you what the spyware was doing" "I changed the subject. Do that before you leave."
So I check the computer out and instantly deduce what the problem is. "Some asshole downloaded "Optimize Your PC". Great. The person who always tries to "maintain" the computer is my father, so... welp.
Fucking old black people.
Excuse me while I whine.
I love my family both extended and close.
That being said if I have to watch another film at a theater with them or over their house again I'm gonna kill myself.
First they have dreaded black folks movie syndrome of wanting to talk during the movie. A gene I never thankfully inherited. SHUT THE FUCK UP. Its rude in public. And at home, well its a private home so that's a bit different but while they are talking to me I can't concentrate and miss shit and so do they.
And worse for me is the analysis of "I wouldn't do that." Every family member I know outside of my mother has a nagging tendency to watch a movie and then put themselves in the place of the characters and tell you what they would or wouldn't do in that situation as its happening. So infuriating. Look fucker. The movie isn't an autobiography of your life. The movie is about Jason Bourne, Batman, or the person who is being cheated on. It doesn't matter what you would do in that situation. I don't care if you wouldn't enter the creepy house in the dark. It's a movie. I'm not watching the 5 minute choose your own adventure movie format of film here.
Yeah I know, just don't watch movies with them. Problem solved. It just happened recently though after not having experienced it in awhile and it annoyed me.
depends. is she hot (http://img835.imageshack.us/img835/1166/ehhv.png)
Excuse me while I whine.
I love my family both extended and close.
That being said if I have to watch another film at a theater with them or over their house again I'm gonna kill myself.
First they have dreaded black folks movie syndrome of wanting to talk during the movie. A gene I never thankfully inherited. SHUT THE FUCK UP. Its rude in public. And at home, well its a private home so that's a bit different but while they are talking to me I can't concentrate and miss shit and so do they.
And worse for me is the analysis of "I wouldn't do that." Every family member I know outside of my mother has a nagging tendency to watch a movie and then put themselves in the place of the characters and tell you what they would or wouldn't do in that situation as its happening. So infuriating. Look fucker. The movie isn't an autobiography of your life. The movie is about Jason Bourne, Batman, or the person who is being cheated on. It doesn't matter what you would do in that situation. I don't care if you wouldn't enter the creepy house in the dark. It's a movie. I'm not watching the 5 minute choose your own adventure movie format of film here.
Yeah I know, just don't watch movies with them. Problem solved. It just happened recently though after not having experienced it in awhile and it annoyed me.
Scuse me?
Also so what if your black. lol stop being racist and stuff. I'm hurt truly deep.
Admit it: white people don't talk during movies. The most noise you'll get from them is the cries and squeals of teenage white girls during a horror movie. Outside of that they're quite.
I've seen black chicks just out their seat screaming, I've seen gay black guys narrate films in the theater ("oh hell nah bitch, why are you going in there bitch, come on bitch run away etc etc"). It has to be genetic, there is no other explanation.
I always thought my family didn't.
Until one time my dad brought home Ong Bak 3, and we were watching with my aunt and cousins. Oh my god they would not shut up.
Speaking of which, I hate HOW LOUD black people have to be. FUCK. I like to play it cool and chill, I don't like to yell or be loud. But then when my aunt comes over, instead of talking like a regular person she shouts. Constantly. And her daughters are almost as bad.
These same cousins think that because my family is in the burbs we are rich and so every time they come over, they bring some stupid ass thing to try and impress us, especially me. It'll be something like a tablet, or even a BB Gun. Girl brings in this pink ass BB gun into my house, and my baby doggy gets scared as SHIT and freaks the fuck out. She doesn't like guns for some reason. But the important thing is, why would they think me or my family gives a fuck about your bb gun?
Another thing: everyone always talking about who got married, and asking why I haven't gotten married yet. Or asking why I don't go to church, and how can I possibly find a black girl to marry if I don't go to church
Another thing: everyone always talking about who got married, and asking why I haven't gotten married yet. Or asking why I don't go to church, and how can I possibly find a black girl to marry if I don't go to church
Ha yup Lan. I've got a female friend who gets asked that all the time, but she's also asked if she's a lesbian lol.
"you're 25 and aren't a mother? are you...a lesbian?" :o
My mom pulls that black woman with an attitude shit if a shop keeper doesn't give her her way. Like, she pull this sass out of nowhere. I'd always distance myself when she did that so no one would think we are related.
Admit it: white people don't talk during movies. The most noise you'll get from them is the cries and squeals of teenage white girls during a horror movie. Outside of that they're quite.
I've seen black chicks just out their seat screaming, I've seen gay black guys narrate films in the theater ("oh hell nah bitch, why are you going in there bitch, come on bitch run away etc etc"). It has to be genetic, there is no other explanation.
My mom pulls that black woman with an attitude shit if a shop keeper doesn't give her her way. Like, she pull this sass out of nowhere. I'd always distance myself when she did that so no one would think we are related.
Admit it: white people don't talk during movies. The most noise you'll get from them is the cries and squeals of teenage white girls during a horror movie. Outside of that they're quite.
I've seen black chicks just out their seat screaming, I've seen gay black guys narrate films in the theater ("oh hell nah bitch, why are you going in there bitch, come on bitch run away etc etc"). It has to be genetic, there is no other explanation.
If white people are good at not talking during movies and make it look easy, it's only because we've had it repeatedly drilled into us from a very early age that talking during a movie is basically the worst possible thing for a human to do. It is the result of training, it doesn't just happen. Saying it must be genetic is like saying that, to reference another stereotype, Asian musical prodigies who've been studying the violin since age 2 must have gotten their talent through racial genetics
My dad when he was alive use to embarrass the shit out of me because he was so outgoing. He had to talk to everybody. No matter where we were. I'm an introverted dude so speaking to random people you just come across in life is not something I do outside of the smallest of small talk which I try to end as quickly as possible. If we went to the grocery store, he would talk to the cashier. If we went to an amusement park, he would talk to the ride operator. And not just a friendly hello nod. He would just talk to everybody about the dumbest shit even if he just came across them.
My mom pulls that black woman with an attitude shit if a shop keeper doesn't give her her way. Like, she pull this sass out of nowhere. I'd always distance myself when she did that so no one would think we are related.
I've never witnessed the "Jewish people haggling over discount" thing. I see Indians do it all the time at work though
My dad when he was alive use to embarrass the shit out of me because he was so outgoing. He had to talk to everybody. No matter where we were. I'm an introverted dude so speaking to random people you just come across in life is not something I do outside of the smallest of small talk which I try to end as quickly as possible. If we went to the grocery store, he would talk to the cashier. If we went to an amusement park, he would talk to the ride operator. And not just a friendly hello nod. He would just talk to everybody about the dumbest shit even if he just came across them.
That's my grandpa.
CNAs (aka professional ass wipers at a nursing home aka "code brown" nurses).
To be fair to my family, Ong Bak 3 sucks.
I've never witnessed the "Jewish people haggling over discount" thing. I see Indians do it all the time at work though
hang out with some Israelis, you will learn how to barter in no time.
Are we brothers?
No way, 2 is amazing. I prefer 2 over 1.
another thing: black people and kung fu movies. what's up with that
too pale and skinny for me, and I doubt that would go over well with her family or my extended familyMove to NYC
now if I can just find a Hispanic chick/family who loves black dudes...
another thing: black people and kung fu movies. what's up with thatThis is the one stereotype that's true for all black people no matter where they're from. Jamaicans LOVE kung fu movies. I misss watching them with my family growing up.
another thing: black people and kung fu movies. what's up with that
No way, 2 is amazing. I prefer 2 over 1.
Nah, 2 was mediocre at best. The first hour and half was Tony Jaa struggling to carry an exposition-heavy movie and failing badly, and there weren't really even any great fights or stunts, except for a few bits in the 20 minutes brawl at the end. Just really boring for the most part and too self-serious.
My wife's mom is telling my kids if I vote for Obama, I'm not allowed at their house anymore. Her sister said to them that if Obama is re-elected, they won't get any xmas presents since she will have to start paying for other peoples health care.
Fucking leave my kids out of your delusion! Even if they are joking, my kids think they are serious.
I haven't had a chance to speak with either of them yet, but they will get a piece of my mind.
My wife's mom is telling my kids if I vote for Obama, I'm not allowed at their house anymore. Her sister said to them that if Obama is re-elected, they won't get any xmas presents since she will have to start paying for other peoples health care.
Fucking leave my kids out of your delusion! Even if they are joking, my kids think they are serious.
I haven't had a chance to speak with either of them yet, but they will get a piece of my mind.
Try this: "If you start talking to my kids about your political bullshit again, you won't get to see them anymore."
My sister lived with me for a few weeks before she found an apartment of her own down here in Nashville. It was fucking horrifying.
I think I'm a really easy person to live with: I usually do most the cleaning, I buy groceries with my roommate in mind, and I always respect their space. It was two fold when my sister was here.
However.
Even though I buy food, even though I clean the dishes, she was the most anal retentive, dramatic bitch queen when it comes to her personal possessions...even if those possessions are both of ours.
"Did you eat any of my chips?"
"You mean our Doritos? Yeah I had like 6 or 7 before work."
"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. YOU ARE THE WORST PIECE OF SHIT BROTHER, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU. RESPECT MY SPACE YOU ASSHOLE."
"herp?"
The first thing she fucking did when she came home from work was COUNT ALL OF HER SHIT, EVEN CHIPS, AND MAKE SURE THEY WERE THE SAME AMOUNT AS WHEN SHE LEFT.
I'm glad she lives somewhere else now. I'm the most complacent roommate ever – I let her have my cheese, chips, drinks, beer, shampoo, anything. Bitch be cray sometimes.
My sister lived with me for a few weeks before she found an apartment of her own down here in Nashville. It was fucking horrifying.
I think I'm a really easy person to live with: I usually do most the cleaning, I buy groceries with my roommate in mind, and I always respect their space. It was two fold when my sister was here.
However.
Even though I buy food, even though I clean the dishes, she was the most anal retentive, dramatic bitch queen when it comes to her personal possessions...even if those possessions are both of ours.
"Did you eat any of my chips?"
"You mean our Doritos? Yeah I had like 6 or 7 before work."
"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. YOU ARE THE WORST PIECE OF SHIT BROTHER, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU. RESPECT MY SPACE YOU ASSHOLE."
"herp?"
The first thing she fucking did when she came home from work was COUNT ALL OF HER SHIT, EVEN CHIPS, AND MAKE SURE THEY WERE THE SAME AMOUNT AS WHEN SHE LEFT.
I'm glad she lives somewhere else now. I'm the most complacent roommate ever – I let her have my cheese, chips, drinks, beer, shampoo, anything. Bitch be cray sometimes.
Wait, you bought the chips... and she complained that you ate some of them? Jesus Christ.
The chip counting reminded me of this though: http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/potato-chip/1182388 (http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/potato-chip/1182388)
My sister is constantly fucking around with her smartphone. It really doesn't pay for her to come visit or meet her for lunch because she's always absorbed in that stuff. She also frequents a lot of dating sites, and this goes hand-in-hand. First she always talks about how GREAT the new guy she is chatting with is, and he isn't like the others. But the next week she's on to another guy.
My sister then complains about how the weirdos keep writing on her Facebook wall. I tell her how easy it is to delete someone, but she makes up bullshit that she can't delete people with the phone app. She really does love the attention. For example, she voiced particular discomfort over a guy I went to school with who came back all fucked up mentally from Iraq and his efforts to get with her. Of course I just checked her profile, and he's still a friend.
She's going to end up chopped up in somebody's Igloo Cooler one day.
Let's not discuss how the source of all her financial woes are all the people on welfare.
This is my sister. Except she's also trying to sell her shit on Facebook constantly. And she actually gets people to give her money so she can go places. Most recently, Spain! She has no job. She has a Masters. She hasn't worked in 4 years. But she always gets the new iphone, ipad and travels fucking everywhere.My sister lived with me for a few weeks before she found an apartment of her own down here in Nashville. It was fucking horrifying.
I think I'm a really easy person to live with: I usually do most the cleaning, I buy groceries with my roommate in mind, and I always respect their space. It was two fold when my sister was here.
However.
Even though I buy food, even though I clean the dishes, she was the most anal retentive, dramatic bitch queen when it comes to her personal possessions...even if those possessions are both of ours.
"Did you eat any of my chips?"
"You mean our Doritos? Yeah I had like 6 or 7 before work."
"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. YOU ARE THE WORST PIECE OF SHIT BROTHER, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU. RESPECT MY SPACE YOU ASSHOLE."
"herp?"
The first thing she fucking did when she came home from work was COUNT ALL OF HER SHIT, EVEN CHIPS, AND MAKE SURE THEY WERE THE SAME AMOUNT AS WHEN SHE LEFT.
I'm glad she lives somewhere else now. I'm the most complacent roommate ever – I let her have my cheese, chips, drinks, beer, shampoo, anything. Bitch be cray sometimes.
Wait, you bought the chips... and she complained that you ate some of them? Jesus Christ.
The chip counting reminded me of this though: http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/potato-chip/1182388 (http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/potato-chip/1182388)
My sister is constantly fucking around with her smartphone. It really doesn't pay for her to come visit or meet her for lunch because she's always absorbed in that stuff. She also frequents a lot of dating sites, and this goes hand-in-hand. First she always talks about how GREAT the new guy she is chatting with is, and he isn't like the others. But the next week she's on to another guy.
My sister then complains about how the weirdos keep writing on her Facebook wall. I tell her how easy it is to delete someone, but she makes up bullshit that she can't delete people with the phone app. She really does love the attention. For example, she voiced particular discomfort over a guy I went to school with who came back all fucked up mentally from Iraq and his efforts to get with her. Of course I just checked her profile, and he's still a friend.
She's going to end up chopped up in somebody's Igloo Cooler one day.
Let's not discuss how the source of all her financial woes are all the people on welfare.
My sister is somewhat similar in the fact that she lives off of Facebook but thinks that we can't see what she posts. So she'll bitch about how she can't pay her bills but we see her pictures of her going out to the bars the night before, talking about all the drinks she had. Another instance she was instigating some shit with one of her on-again, off-again friends and then cried that she was being cyberbullied.
too pale and skinny for me, and I doubt that would go over well with her family or my extended familyMove to NYC
now if I can just find a Hispanic chick/family who loves black dudes...another thing: black people and kung fu movies. what's up with thatThis is the one stereotype that's true for all black people no matter where they're from. Jamaicans LOVE kung fu movies. I misss watching them with my family growing up.