THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: Olivia Wilde Homo on April 18, 2016, 12:16:18 PM

Title: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Olivia Wilde Homo on April 18, 2016, 12:16:18 PM
What did you learn in your life that you could pass on to the forum 12 year olds (Andrex)?

I'll start:

- Quality over quantity
- Stand up for yourself
- Get out of your comfort zone
- Nobody cares what you did in high school
- Better to get shot down by a chick than staying at home and rubbing one out
- Nobody cares about how much e-cred you have
- Don't take the internet seriously.  Use the "x" button at the top right corner if you think you might be.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Am_I_Anonymous on April 18, 2016, 12:18:19 PM
Don't ever talk to white people about their families, ever.  Two things are sure to happen;


1) They will overload you with pictures and stories
2) Somebody in their family is really fucked up.

Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: nachobro on April 18, 2016, 12:34:25 PM
- learn how to use the Taco Bell app and learn it well. sub beef for beans.
also add nacho cheese to everything
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: CatsCatsCats on April 18, 2016, 12:39:51 PM
- learn how to use the Taco Bell app and learn it well. sub beef for beans.

I got through to someone, my life's work is complete
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: mormapope on April 18, 2016, 12:47:28 PM
When eating at a Indian buffet, learn to pace yourself. Don't get too much rice on the plate, don't use too much chutney or sauces, fried vegetables are a must, save room for Indian desserts, always save room for the homemade icecream.

Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Steve Contra on April 18, 2016, 12:51:01 PM
Marry someone smarter than you.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Am_I_Anonymous on April 18, 2016, 01:01:19 PM
Marry someone smarter than you.

Also marry someone you can live with and not have sex with on a daily basis. If you marry for looks your luck will be lacking.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Human Snorenado on April 18, 2016, 01:11:10 PM
If it seems too good to be true, it is.

Once you're older, if you're working harder and not smarter, you fucked up somewhere.

No matter how perfect someone seems, somewhere somebody is sick of their shit.

For that matter, somebody is sick of your shit, too.

That person in your late 20's, early 30's? Just go ahead and settle on them. Being single when you're older is the drizzling shits.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 18, 2016, 01:21:10 PM
Don't try to become a balloon-man by sticking an air compressor up your ass. 
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Cerveza mas fina on April 18, 2016, 01:22:20 PM
Dont take advice from men on the internet
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Phoenix Dark on April 18, 2016, 01:27:25 PM
-Join an academic club in college to build some early connections
-If you find a good teacher in your major, keep taking his or her classes and make yourself known. Another good way to build early connections
-Jerking off to porn daily will ensure you last long during sex but it'll fuck up your sensitivity. Take a long break from porn
-Learn how to change your own oil and do various other handy jobs
-Being a decent dude will make you stand out to a lot of chicks but don't be a simp
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Am_I_Anonymous on April 18, 2016, 01:41:01 PM

-Jerking off to porn daily will ensure you last long during sex

 :confused

Know how I know you don't have sex?
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Human Snorenado on April 18, 2016, 02:25:04 PM
There is no sex in the champagne room. But, if you really want to fuck a stripper, just tell her you've got a couple hundred bucks and a bunch of blow in your hotel room.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Brehvolution on April 18, 2016, 02:27:09 PM
- Don't use a lighter to light anything with gasoline on it. It's faster than you.
- Arguing on the internet is a waste of your time.
- Don't buy anything on a credit card that you can't pay off within a month.
- Network news is nothing but trash.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Great Rumbler on April 18, 2016, 02:27:20 PM
No matter how much you achieve or fail to achieve, you're still gonna die.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: mormapope on April 18, 2016, 02:42:09 PM
Comradery lasts a lot longer than stuffing your dick in a random hole once.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: toku on April 18, 2016, 03:16:33 PM
- don't stop
- let go
- if you feel lost but have ppl in your life that love you and know you give yourself to them and forget about the rest
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Huff on April 18, 2016, 03:26:48 PM
Yolo
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: ToxicAdam on April 18, 2016, 03:32:38 PM
Getting most of your self-worth and esteem from the attention/affection of the opposite sex is the biggest dead-end in life.

Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: TakingBackSunday on April 18, 2016, 03:41:13 PM
Good fucking lord, do not drink and drive.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Human Snorenado on April 18, 2016, 03:45:22 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PeyAIr8XfD4
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Phoenix Dark on April 18, 2016, 04:04:54 PM
-Don't chase the affection of people who don't want you
-Work out. You don't have to go Rambo but just walking, jogging, running the bleachers, dumb bells etc to get some basic FORM to your body will work wonders
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: pilonv1 on April 18, 2016, 05:41:35 PM
If you make a mistake, you can't talk your way out of it, but you can act your way out of it.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Tasty on April 18, 2016, 06:31:18 PM
If you make a mistake, you can't talk your way out of it, but you can act your way out of it.

:ohhh
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Rufus on April 18, 2016, 07:18:44 PM
If you make a mistake, you can't talk your way out of it, but you can act your way out of it.
Delicious ambiguity there.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 18, 2016, 08:25:24 PM
But cant you interpretive dance out of it? 
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: tiesto on April 18, 2016, 09:24:34 PM
Get out of your bubble and spend some time talking with those who may not necessarily share your political ideas
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: eleuin on April 18, 2016, 09:53:07 PM
C.R.E.A.M
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: chronovore on April 18, 2016, 10:50:47 PM
Write to people when you're thinking about them. Everyone loves to hear that they've been kindly recalled. Don't put it off. Sometimes that urge gets put off for so long that they're no longer alive.

Dont take advice from men on the internet
:ohhh
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: I'm a Puppy! on April 19, 2016, 12:59:15 AM
Never marry someone you can live with. Marry someone you cant live without and never stop wooing them.

If you're going to do something someone has already done, either do it better or in a new way or don't do it at all

Wherever you go act like you belong there

The smartest guy in the room knows when to act like the second smartest guy

For people to truly buy what you're selling they need to feel it was their idea not yours

Everyone is out for themselves. No exceptions.

As a parent the most important things you'll teach your kids are how to live without you and how to love and be loved. Everything else is secondary.

Everyone you meet is going through their own hell. Try to be patient. If you cant be patient then at least be entertained.

If you want to find smart people look for the funny ones. They tend to think fast and creatively

Failure is the best teacher. So when doing something actively seek to fail early so you have enough time to learn from it before you must succeed
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: HyperZoneWasAwesome on April 19, 2016, 03:06:36 AM
store brand peanut butter is always shit. Spend the extra 40 cents for something nicer.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: T234 on April 19, 2016, 05:26:02 AM
If the deal is too good to be true, walk away. If ya don't, you might hafta jump out a window.


If the sun is coming up and you been up all night snorting coke, and you ain't got nobody to fuck, put the coke back in yer pocket. Your right nostril and wallet will thank you.

Don't take more than a few hits of LSD. You will feel it every day of your life if you do. Sometimes in a good way, sometimes not at all in a good way.

Karma is real.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Purrp Skirrp on April 19, 2016, 06:26:15 AM
Accept compliments regardless of how you feel about their validity. Thank the person rather than rejecting their claim; both of you will feel better for it.

Similarly, try not to invalidate people, even when you disagree with them. With tact you can acknowledge someone's ideas without condoning them. You will be more effective at getting your point across this way.

Ask questions and be wary when you find youself mind reading, though trust that you can and will at times have to rely on intuition.

Do not become overly attached to the identity you have created for yourself. While it may bring necessary meaning to your life, confining yourself too much to an image will inevitably stifle growth and ensure that the shock is that much greater when unforseen events challenge your self perception and world view. People who are more willing to accept radical change, such as the loss of a limb, are better able to move on with their lives and reclaim their happiness.

Show empathy for others but prioritize your needs. The better you take care of yourself the more capable you are of helping others. If you have the ability to do so, know when to walk away from people and situations that are detrimental to your health. Unfortunately that includes family and friends at times.

Maintain some skeptism in your life; the world is more gray than it is black and white, and conventional wisdom isn't always wise. Sometimes it pays to go against the grain, despite everyone telling you otherwise.

Having some semblance of hope, even when the odds are against you, is better than resorting to a life of cynicism.

Isolation is terrible for your health and a surefire way to worsen whatever conditions are leading you to this behavior.

Be patient with yourself always; breaking maladaptive habits and building healthier ones takes time and diligence. Expect setbacks, but analyze what went wrong and create new strategies accordingly. Same goes with unhealthy thought patterns. Remember the brain is somewhat neuroplastic. If you are hard on yourself, and often have a kind of abusive internal dialogue going, try talking to the kid version of you. It should shift the dialogue to be a lot more nurturing.

Fake it till you make it has some truth to it. Little things like sitting upright trigger hormonal changes in the body, which then in turn help increase measures of confidence and can actually improve your mindset.

Distractions are useful for taking your mind off things you rather not think about, but use them sparingly as reliance leads to inaction and will never resolve your problems.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Purrp Skirrp on April 19, 2016, 04:24:02 PM
You know you've fucked up when your content is too excessive for a fat Taco Bell stan.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: zomgee on April 19, 2016, 04:26:11 PM
If it feels like more than two fingers it's probably a dick
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: TakingBackSunday on April 19, 2016, 05:04:53 PM
You know you've fucked up when your content is too excessive for a fat Taco Bell stan.

another mistake. ideal way to eat taco bell is low content items but 2-3 of them.

#lifelessons

 :ohhh

that truth
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 19, 2016, 06:54:34 PM
Never marry someone you can live with. Marry someone you cant live without and never stop wooing them.

If you're going to do something someone has already done, either do it better or in a new way or don't do it at all

Wherever you go act like you belong there

The smartest guy in the room knows when to act like the second smartest guy

For people to truly buy what you're selling they need to feel it was their idea not yours

Everyone is out for themselves. No exceptions.

As a parent the most important things you'll teach your kids are how to live without you and how to love and be loved. Everything else is secondary.

Everyone you meet is going through their own hell. Try to be patient. If you cant be patient then at least be entertained.

If you want to find smart people look for the funny ones. They tend to think fast and creatively

Failure is the best teacher. So when doing something actively seek to fail early so you have enough time to learn from it before you must succeed

Stop forwarding me emails, Grandma.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: I'm a Puppy! on April 19, 2016, 08:00:57 PM
You wont believe what Obama said.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Olivia Wilde Homo on April 19, 2016, 11:06:05 PM
Another thing is don't be the douchebag who always talks about doing something but never does.  Shit, get off the pot, or shut the fuck up.
Title: Re: Pass along your life lessons
Post by: Yeti on April 19, 2016, 11:43:00 PM
store brand peanut butter is always shit. Spend the extra 40 cents for something nicer.

Also toilet paper