THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: Shostakovich on February 08, 2018, 05:11:10 AM

Title: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: Shostakovich on February 08, 2018, 05:11:10 AM
sauce (http://www.pjstar.com/news/20180207/soured-romance-spurs-hot-sauce-vandalism-in-peoria)
Quote
PEORIA — Love grown cold sparked hot-sauce vandalism Friday, police said.

According to a Peoria police report, a resident of the 2100 block of Northcrest Drive said she had been out between 3 a.m. and 6:11 a.m. Friday. When she returned home, she found the place “totally messed up,” the report stated. Couches and a table were overturned, as was a mattress in the bedroom, according to the report.

“It also appeared that someone had taken what seemed like hot sauce and poured it all over the wall and mattress in the bedroom,” the report stated.

The report did not note the brand of hot sauce. There was no estimate on the total damage, but the mattress is valued at $200.

Police noted there was no sign of forced entry, but an intruder could have entered through an unlocked door. The resident said she suspects her ex-boyfriend, with whom she had argued earlier that night during a chance encounter at a gas station, the report stated.
3AM to 6AM is a booty call. He hot sauced her fuckin mattress while she was gettin the hot burrito :lawd
Title: Re: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: Momo on February 08, 2018, 06:31:14 AM
Quote
The report did not note the brand of hot sauce
DO YOUR JOB JOURNALISTS, THIS IS CRITICAL INFORMATION
Title: Re: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: zomgee on February 08, 2018, 06:53:46 AM
Do not cross Billy Mitchell.
Title: Re: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: Atramental on February 08, 2018, 07:39:25 AM
 :nothot
Title: Re: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: seagrams hotsauce on February 08, 2018, 10:41:13 AM
hotsauce is one word
Title: Re: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: Joe Molotov on February 08, 2018, 10:46:10 AM
hotsauce is one word

what about hotburrito?
Title: Re: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: BlueTsunami on February 08, 2018, 12:38:31 PM
It was probably Cholula that basic ass nicca
Title: Re: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: seagrams hotsauce on February 08, 2018, 12:55:39 PM
It's still one word, no matter how many screenshots you take the time to edit in paint

edit: nevermind i can't even pretend the last thing i wrote before this edit was true
Title: Re: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: samfish on February 08, 2018, 01:12:52 PM
Hot sauce is so low effort. Use something that’ll stain forever, like yellow mustard
Title: Re: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: Akala on February 08, 2018, 01:13:05 PM
21 savage  :cmonson
Title: Re: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: Great Rumbler on February 08, 2018, 04:59:33 PM
Quote
but the mattress is valued at $200

Disgusting. Tempur-Pedic or don't even bother.
Title: Re: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: jorma on February 09, 2018, 09:17:37 AM
Mods help!

Rename seagrams hotsauce to seagrams hot sauce please.

It's the right thing to do.

Title: Re: Area Man sauces ex's entire house
Post by: Himu on February 09, 2018, 09:26:07 AM
Sauce me, daddy