THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: drozmight on April 06, 2007, 12:30:49 AM

Title: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: drozmight on April 06, 2007, 12:30:49 AM
Someone at work tried to ask me how my day was while I was taking a poo.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Stocky on April 06, 2007, 12:32:06 AM
I hate when people knock on the stall and ask if you're ok
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 12:32:32 AM
I hate when people knock on the stall and ask if you're ok

That happen to you lots?
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Stocky on April 06, 2007, 12:34:48 AM
Why, is that unusual?
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: cloudwalking on April 06, 2007, 12:35:18 AM
i hate when women bring their young children in the public bathrooms and don't keep a fucking eye on them. then the little shits, sometimes male, peek their heads under the stall door and you have some dumbass toddler staring you down while you're taking a piss. if only it was legal to kick them in the face.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Stocky on April 06, 2007, 12:36:27 AM
I hate when that happens.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 12:38:13 AM
i hate when women bring their young children in the public bathrooms and don't keep a fucking eye on them. then the little shits, sometimes male, peek their heads under the stall door and you have some dumbass toddler staring you down while you're taking a piss. if only it was legal to kick them in the face.

Now I know why I got deja view when I accidentally rotated one of your pictures of you in photoshop! 
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: demi on April 06, 2007, 12:40:13 AM
i hate when women bring their young children in the public bathrooms and don't keep a fucking eye on them. then the little shits, sometimes male, peek their heads under the stall door and you have some dumbass toddler staring you down while you're taking a piss. if only it was legal to kick them in the face.

please don't say "taking a piss." it's very uncomfortable hearing a woman say it.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: drozmight on April 06, 2007, 12:42:00 AM
i hate when women bring their young children in the public bathrooms and don't keep a fucking eye on them. then the little shits, sometimes male, peek their heads under the stall door and you have some dumbass toddler staring you down while you're taking a piss. if only it was legal to kick them in the face.

please don't say "taking a piss." it's very uncomfortable hearing a woman say it.

"taking a squirt" is a better phrase for chicks.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Stocky on April 06, 2007, 12:44:07 AM
I used to tell women around me that the only way that they could fart near me was if they said "'teehee, I pooted" afterwards.

Kinda made my dick hard.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 12:44:37 AM
I always preferred "vagina leaking" - which I just made up - because it leaves an uncertainty to the mind.  Is she peeing, bleeding or cumming?  Know one should ever know, unless its the later, then tell me...very clearly...because its hard to tell. 
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 12:45:19 AM
I used to tell women around me that the only way that they could fart near me was if they said "'teehee, I pooted" afterwards.

Kinda made my dick hard.
:lol :lol :lol
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: cloudwalking on April 06, 2007, 12:47:10 AM
i hate when women bring their young children in the public bathrooms and don't keep a fucking eye on them. then the little shits, sometimes male, peek their heads under the stall door and you have some dumbass toddler staring you down while you're taking a piss. if only it was legal to kick them in the face.

please don't say "taking a piss." it's very uncomfortable hearing a woman say it.

never move in with a woman
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Stocky on April 06, 2007, 12:48:12 AM
On the subject, I hate this bathroom bullshit you have to go through.

When they tell you to cough when someone comes in so they know you're in the stall. What the fuck is up with that? Now you make them think you're sick and taking a shit. Really makes them feel comfortable.

And when you have to be a urinal away from another guy. I was in the movie theatre the other night and I had to go piss, but the first 6 out of 7 stalls were taken with fegs who don't know bathroom manners. Of course, I walk all the fuck the way down to go piss.

This is bullshit.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: MrAngryFace on April 06, 2007, 01:10:19 AM
What I dont get is how people get pee on top of the urinal. Even if youre tall you have to be pretty fuckin tall to piss on top of a normal height urinal
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Stocky on April 06, 2007, 01:13:14 AM
And tell me this:

Why is it that in a fucking office building, they have kiddie urinals
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 01:22:08 AM
And tell me this:

Why is it that in a fucking office building, they have kiddie urinals

Himu is people too you know! 
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Ichirou on April 06, 2007, 01:26:05 AM
i hate when women bring their young children in the public bathrooms and don't keep a fucking eye on them. then the little shits, sometimes male, peek their heads under the stall door and you have some dumbass toddler staring you down while you're taking a piss. if only it was legal to kick them in the face.

...that's happened to you before?

That's hot.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Phoenix Dark on April 06, 2007, 01:26:41 AM
girls don't piss. it's tinkle
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Stocky on April 06, 2007, 01:26:57 AM
Cloud needs to start up a water sports site, ASAP
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Stocky on April 06, 2007, 01:27:21 AM
girls don't piss. it's tinkle

Did you drink it? Was it MAGICAL
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 01:28:21 AM
Cloud needs to start up a water sports site, ASAP

She could be in the money like two mins into opening the site. 
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Stocky on April 06, 2007, 01:29:03 AM
Cloud needs to start up a water sports site, ASAP

She could be in the money like two mins into opening the site. 

I'd buy 5 subscriptions.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Ichirou on April 06, 2007, 01:29:40 AM
I think if I saw some kid peeking at me under the stall door while I was taking a crap I'd reflexively kick him in the face.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 01:31:38 AM
I think if I saw some kid peeking at me under the stall door while I was taking a crap I'd reflexively kick him in the face.

I'd try and pee on his little freak of a face!

But seriously how old was the kid cloud?  Becouse I've never heard of this in the mens bathroom, so it could have just been because you were hot and the kid wanted a peek.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: drozmight on April 06, 2007, 01:32:06 AM
I just wrote a short script:

Guy outside the stall door: "Hey Droz how was your day?"

Me: "...."

Guy: "Pretty good?"

Droz: "Why are you talking to me right now?"

*guy walks away*
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: G The Resurrected on April 06, 2007, 01:32:41 AM
We have co-ed bathrooms at work upstairs so its really unusual to go use the bathroom even to take a piss. And even worse its got a dispensor for condoms, women products, and worse athletes foot cream and vaginal itch cream. I'll just hold it and go at home.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Ichirou on April 06, 2007, 01:34:21 AM
I think if I saw some kid peeking at me under the stall door while I was taking a crap I'd reflexively kick him in the face.

I'd try and pee on his little freak of a face!

But seriously how old was the kid cloud?  Becouse I've never heard of this in the mens bathroom, so it could have just been because you were hot and the kid wanted a peek.

Shit, what a horny little bastard that kid must've been.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 01:49:21 AM
I think if I saw some kid peeking at me under the stall door while I was taking a crap I'd reflexively kick him in the face.

I'd try and pee on his little freak of a face!

But seriously how old was the kid cloud?  Becouse I've never heard of this in the mens bathroom, so it could have just been because you were hot and the kid wanted a peek.

Shit, what a horny little bastard that kid must've been.

I would have done it as a kid. 
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Ichirou on April 06, 2007, 01:49:47 AM
I wouldn't have had the guts.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: cloudwalking on April 06, 2007, 01:53:01 AM
little girls did it to me too. seriously it's happened to me a bunch of times. it's just stupid fucking moms who don't watch their kids and they just go down the line and peek under every stall. once i heard the chick in the stall next to me yell out "KEEP YOUR FUCKING KID ON A LEASH, AUGH" when some distinguished mentally-challenged fellow's 3-year old daughter peeked her head under the door. the kid started crying and the mom said something like "how dare you talk that way to my child" and left while the chick was still in the stall.

i waited to come out of my stall because i wanted to see what the angry peeing woman looked like. we met at the sink while we were washing our hands and sure enough she was this really butch-looking goth chick.

man i wish i had those kind of balls to say something like that to dumbass parents. it was awkward, though
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Ichirou on April 06, 2007, 01:55:18 AM
That's never happened to me.  Hahaha, can you imagine how creepy it would be if a little kid did it while you were in one of those japanese-style squat toilets?  :lol
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 01:57:18 AM
squat toilets? 
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Ichirou on April 06, 2007, 01:57:48 AM
It's just a hole in the ground and you have to squat over it while you poop or pee.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 02:00:42 AM
ewww.  I like my ass checks split as far as possible when I poop - which means the necessity of using a set, because I'm sure as hell not spreading with my hands!


spoiler (click to show/hide)
That sounded rather gross.  Calling Ecro  :-*
[close]
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Ichirou on April 06, 2007, 02:48:09 AM
Y'know when you squat your ass cheeks spread naturally, right?
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: demi on April 06, 2007, 03:00:41 AM
Y'know when you squat your ass cheeks spread naturally, right?

Gay Strike #1

Two more remaining
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Ichirou on April 06, 2007, 03:59:09 AM
Y'know when you squat your ass cheeks spread naturally, right?

Gay Strike #1

Two more remaining

I love giving oral sex to other men.

I also like to insert my penis into men's lubricated anuses, and thrust back and forth until I ejaculate.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: G The Resurrected on April 06, 2007, 04:01:40 AM
Y'know when you squat your ass cheeks spread naturally, right?

Gay Strike #1

Two more remaining

I love giving oral sex to other men.

I also like to insert my penis into men's lubricated anuses, and thrust back and forth until I ejaculate.

You werent kidding? you gay boy?
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Ichirou on April 06, 2007, 06:13:31 AM
Y'know when you squat your ass cheeks spread naturally, right?

Gay Strike #1

Two more remaining

I love giving oral sex to other men.

I also like to insert my penis into men's lubricated anuses, and thrust back and forth until I ejaculate.

You werent kidding? you gay boy?

 :-*
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 12:33:50 PM
Y'know when you squat your ass cheeks spread naturally, right?

but not as far as possible - which requires human ingenuity.  natural spread is far to animalistic for me.  I shit with dignity! 
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Tauntaun on April 06, 2007, 12:43:29 PM
I always preferred "vagina leaking" - which I just made up - because it leaves an uncertainty to the mind.  Is she peeing, bleeding or cumming?  Know one should ever know, unless its the later, then tell me...very clearly...because its hard to tell. 

they don't pee out of their vagina
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 12:46:14 PM
I refer to vagina as all the parts down there, not the technical definition of vagina. 
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Saint Cornelius on April 06, 2007, 12:49:51 PM
Whenever I need to take a shit, I go to the bathroom farthest away from my lab. I don't want anyone I know to walk in when I'm blowing it up.

It seems like there's a lot of people where I work that just go in there and wreck the sanctity of the place with their foul odors. What ever happened to the courtesy flush?
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Tauntaun on April 06, 2007, 12:53:04 PM
I refer to vagina as all the parts down there, not the technical definition of vagina. 

oh, ok.   so can I pee on you?  :-*
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: FlameOfCallandor on April 06, 2007, 12:53:58 PM
Pro-tip: When you need peaceful poopytime on campus go to the top floor of the library and use that bathroom. People these days barely even use book libraries any more.

The only drawback is that I have heard that all the gay sex happens in these type of bathrooms.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 12:54:42 PM
In my mouth  :hyper


...I mean as long as I can return the favor and if some one asks I was stung by jelly fish. 
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Tauntaun on April 06, 2007, 12:58:54 PM
In my mouth  :hyper


...I mean as long as I can return the favor and if some one asks I was stung by jelly fish. 

we can pee on each other while holding/throwing jelly fish. :hyper

spoiler (click to show/hide)
:hump
[close]
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 01:12:27 PM
hot. 

We should make it an orgy, call it "The piss pour jelly fish bash" and give out invitations. 

EBers sing up here if you want to come?
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Tauntaun on April 06, 2007, 01:23:10 PM
hot. 

We should make it an orgy, call it "The piss poor jelly fish bash" and give out invitations. 

EBers sing up here if you want to come?

 :lol :lol :lol  We'll sting your dick RAW!
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: omg_lemurs on April 06, 2007, 08:03:05 PM
little girls did it to me too. seriously it's happened to me a bunch of times. it's just stupid fucking moms who don't watch their kids and they just go down the line and peek under every stall. once i heard the chick in the stall next to me yell out "KEEP YOUR FUCKING KID ON A LEASH, AUGH" when some distinguished mentally-challenged fellow's 3-year old daughter peeked her head under the door. the kid started crying and the mom said something like "how dare you talk that way to my child" and left while the chick was still in the stall.

i waited to come out of my stall because i wanted to see what the angry peeing woman looked like. we met at the sink while we were washing our hands and sure enough she was this really butch-looking goth chick.

man i wish i had those kind of balls to say something like that to dumbass parents. it was awkward, though

See what pisses me off and is much more common is when you're in say... a restaurant where there's only one toilet and no stall since it's made only to accommodate one person. There's a lock on the door for this reason. Well when you're on the toilet going to the bathroom and someone comes up and doesn't knock and tries to open the door. Okay, not so bad whatever right? Well instead of knocking or waiting they just keep jiggling the handle as though it's going to magically unlock the door. You yell out that you're in the restroom, but they don't hear you... but you can hear the silly bitch outside the door saying to the other members of her party/staff THE DOOR'S LOCKED! No fucking shit distinguished mentally-challenged fellow, because there's someone in there.

I've never had anyone poke their head under the stall while I was on the toilet. One time at the movie theater after a movie I was going pee in a handicap stall and this old fucking hag started knocking on the stall door because she left her purse in the stall beside the toilet. I said THERE'S SOMEBODY IN HERE but the woman was like I JUST NEED TO GET MY PURSE and I must not have locked the stall door all the way because the DEMENTED FUCK OPENED THE DOOR... LOOKED RIGHT AT ME... AND WENT TO GO GRAB HER PURSE.

I was speechless.

Then there's the story about how I once showered in the same room as a priest. There's no way I can do the story justice telling it over the internet in text.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 06, 2007, 09:01:54 PM
 :lol :lol :lol She came in when you were in there?  The fuck is wrong with people.


Showing with a priest?  Tell it!
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Phoenix Dark on April 06, 2007, 11:25:59 PM
 :lol :lol Yeah there's nothing worse than someone knocking on the door.


My bathroom story :(
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=92262
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: xnikki118x on April 07, 2007, 06:20:51 PM
little girls did it to me too. seriously it's happened to me a bunch of times. it's just stupid fucking moms who don't watch their kids and they just go down the line and peek under every stall. once i heard the chick in the stall next to me yell out "KEEP YOUR FUCKING KID ON A LEASH, AUGH" when some distinguished mentally-challenged fellow's 3-year old daughter peeked her head under the door. the kid started crying and the mom said something like "how dare you talk that way to my child" and left while the chick was still in the stall.

i waited to come out of my stall because i wanted to see what the angry peeing woman looked like. we met at the sink while we were washing our hands and sure enough she was this really butch-looking goth chick.

man i wish i had those kind of balls to say something like that to dumbass parents. it was awkward, though

Hahaha I HATE when fucking kids do that, especially when you have stupid moms bringing like 6-year-old boys into the womens' bathroom.

It would be great if it were legal to kick the fucker in the faceeee.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: xnikki118x on April 07, 2007, 06:26:30 PM
but you can hear the silly bitch outside the door saying to the other members of her party/staff THE DOOR'S LOCKED! No fucking shit distinguished mentally-challenged fellow, because there's someone in there.

I've never had anyone poke their head under the stall while I was on the toilet. One time at the movie theater after a movie I was going pee in a handicap stall and this old fucking hag started knocking on the stall door because she left her purse in the stall beside the toilet. I said THERE'S SOMEBODY IN HERE but the woman was like I JUST NEED TO GET MY PURSE and I must not have locked the stall door all the way because the DEMENTED FUCK OPENED THE DOOR... LOOKED RIGHT AT ME... AND WENT TO GO GRAB HER PURSE.

LOL of course the fucking door is locked.

Okay crazy oldf hag lady? I probably would have actually stood up and pushed her out the door or something. Seriously. WTF!?!?

Isn't that some kind of sex crime, to break your way into someone's bathroom stall? It could be!
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Stocky on April 08, 2007, 12:11:16 AM
nikki doesn't shit. she is perfect.  ::)
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 08, 2007, 12:34:27 AM
nikki doesn't shit. she is perfect.  ::)

True. 
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Himu on April 08, 2007, 12:48:56 AM
This thread is amazing.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Himu on April 08, 2007, 12:53:30 AM
I just want to say I love being and asshole, and pissing on toilets with the seats let up in public places.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Madrun Badrun on April 08, 2007, 12:53:37 AM
This thread is amazing.

Like you, honny buns  :-*
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Catz on April 08, 2007, 05:20:44 AM
i hate when women bring their young children in the public bathrooms and don't keep a fucking eye on them. then the little shits, sometimes male, peek their heads under the stall door and you have some dumbass toddler staring you down while you're taking a piss. if only it was legal to kick them in the face.

!!!

That happens to me ALL the time. I HATE PARENTS THAT DON'T WATCH THEIR CHILDREN. Seriously, I've had 3 or 4 little brats slide under the door to look and even caught one looking above at me from the other stall. WTF!! One time the kid was like 8 years old too, christ. I really wish I could of smushed his head into the tile floor :punch I salute that goth girl for saying that.

I'm going to keep my kids on a harness and hang 'em on the purse holder for safe keeping  :lol
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: drozmight on April 08, 2007, 06:04:02 AM
I really wish I could of smushed his head into the tile floor

Marry me!
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: xnikki118x on April 08, 2007, 11:41:59 AM
!!!

That happens to me ALL the time. I HATE PARENTS THAT DON'T WATCH THEIR CHILDREN. Seriously, I've had 3 or 4 little brats slide under the door to look and even caught one looking above at me from the other stall. WTF!! One time the kid was like 8 years old too, christ. I really wish I could of smushed his head into the tile floor :punch I salute that goth girl for saying that.

I'm going to keep my kids on a harness and hang 'em on the purse holder for safe keeping  :lol

:lol :lol :lol

Hilarious. Catz, you, me, and Cloud are gonna walk around with kids on harnesses and NOT let them peek under bathroom stalls!
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: G The Resurrected on April 08, 2007, 12:22:20 PM
:lol :lol :lol

Hilarious. Catz, you, me, and Cloud are gonna walk around with kids on harnesses and NOT let them peek under bathroom stalls!

What about the Husbands? Harnesses for them? Us men can be just as bad as young fucking kids. Walking into the female bathroom when your at a bar has in the past been adventurous.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Yeti on April 08, 2007, 01:14:02 PM
Ew, don't put your kids on one of those leashes. That is so tacky and white trash.  :-\

Just take the effort to teach them common sense.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Mupepe on April 08, 2007, 02:27:38 PM
:lol :lol Yeah there's nothing worse than someone knocking on the door.


My bathroom story :(
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=92262
ROFL
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: demi on April 08, 2007, 02:30:06 PM
Ew, don't put your kids on one of those leashes. That is so tacky and white trash.  :-\

Just take the effort to teach them common sense.

Common sense dictates that when in a woman's bathroom, you try to get the most out of it because you're gonna get kicked out the minute you are spotted.
Title: Re: When I'm Pooping, Don't Talk To Me.
Post by: Mupepe on April 08, 2007, 02:35:21 PM
Ew, don't put your kids on one of those leashes. That is so tacky and white trash.  :-\

Just take the effort to teach them common sense.

Common sense dictates that when in a woman's bathroom, you try to get the most out of it because you're gonna get kicked out the minute you are spotted.
Pretty much.  We all know that we would do the same thing as those 8 year olds.