THE BORE
General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: GilloD on June 05, 2007, 04:47:59 PM
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Well, my fiancee and I needed to make it official to head into the Peace Corps together. Ever since then, it's been. Fucked! I don't think more than 4 people have said, "Congratulations!". There have been a lot of "BAD IDEA UR DUMB!" from nearly every corner of my social circle, my mother keeps updating me on which of her friends think it's a bad idea. Isn't getting engaged supposed to be fun or relaxing? At the very least, it shouldn't be this stressful. Now the Peace Corps is swapping deadlines on us and our little European getaway got downsized to a Work-on-a-farm-for-free getaway has now become a Work-at-Applebee's-because-I-can't-afford-my-student-loans-away.
I feel great about getting engaged to a woman I adore and respect and love to death, but everything else since has been absolutely horrific.
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You poor, dumb sucker.
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How old are you two? How long have you two been together? Have you two been accepted into the Peace Corps yet? My wife's sister and her husband recently finished up their 2 1/2 years in Morocco.
Getting engaged is STRESSFUL. But that all goes away on the day of the wedding. By that point, people relax, as there is nothing you can do about things at that point. Since then, married life has been great.
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http://www.hiphopmusicdotcom.com/ugk-intl-players-anthem-video-international-players-anthem.html
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Uh... most engagements usually happen after a longer period of time, when everyone gets to know the person, and all that. Getting engaged just to get into the Peace Corps kinda spoils it.
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Congrats on the engagement... A bit off topic but were you born in NYC or only lived there for a few years?
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How old are you two? How long have you two been together?
answer this.
If you are young like 21ish then uh this will probably backfire
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Uh... most engagements usually happen after a longer period of time, when everyone gets to know the person, and all that. Getting engaged just to get into the Peace Corps kinda spoils it.
Yup. This sounds like more of a business partnership than engagement
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Uh... most engagements usually happen after a longer period of time, when everyone gets to know the person, and all that. Getting engaged just to get into the Peace Corps kinda spoils it.
Yup. This sounds like more of a business partnership than engagement
yes, and if my gut feeling is right and he is younger then this will implode before Michelle first makes out with vampire girl
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Uh... most engagements usually happen after a longer period of time, when everyone gets to know the person, and all that. Getting engaged just to get into the Peace Corps kinda spoils it.
Yup. This sounds like more of a business partnership than engagement
yes, and if my gut feeling is right and he is younger then this will implode before Michelle first makes out with vampire girl
You can't get into the Peace Corps without a college degree, so at the very least, he's 21 or 22.
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Uh... most engagements usually happen after a longer period of time, when everyone gets to know the person, and all that. Getting engaged just to get into the Peace Corps kinda spoils it.
Yup. This sounds like more of a business partnership than engagement
yes, and if my gut feeling is right and he is younger then this will implode before Michelle first makes out with vampire girl
You can't get into the Peace Corps without a college degree, so at the very least, he's 21 or 22.
still 21-22 is abnormally early for america today. For a good reason.
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Uh... most engagements usually happen after a longer period of time, when everyone gets to know the person, and all that. Getting engaged just to get into the Peace Corps kinda spoils it.
Yup. This sounds like more of a business partnership than engagement
yes, and if my gut feeling is right and he is younger then this will implode before Michelle first makes out with vampire girl
You can't get into the Peace Corps without a college degree, so at the very least, he's 21 or 22.
still 21-22 is abnormally early for america today. For a good reason.
Oh, I agree. I got married one month before I turned 25, but I couldn't see myself getting married any earlier than I did.
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Uh... most engagements usually happen after a longer period of time, when everyone gets to know the person, and all that. Getting engaged just to get into the Peace Corps kinda spoils it.
Yup. This sounds like more of a business partnership than engagement
yes, and if my gut feeling is right and he is younger then this will implode before Michelle first makes out with vampire girl
Um, I've made out with her and made love to her belly button
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Uh... most engagements usually happen after a longer period of time, when everyone gets to know the person, and all that. Getting engaged just to get into the Peace Corps kinda spoils it.
Yup. This sounds like more of a business partnership than engagement
yes, and if my gut feeling is right and he is younger then this will implode before Michelle first makes out with vampire girl
You can't get into the Peace Corps without a college degree, so at the very least, he's 21 or 22.
still 21-22 is abnormally early for america today. For a good reason.
Oh, I agree. I got married one month before I turned 25, but I couldn't see myself getting married any earlier than I did.
yeah that is about the earliest I'd think people are "adult" enough to get married. People under 24 tend to be (not at eb it seems though for good or bad) the type who care more about parties and booze than how they are doing in college, and the idea of that type trying to settle down..is unsettling (lol two words that are the same lol)
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bad idea duder
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gillod knows my thoughts on my marriage. But i'm really happy for him nonetheless. he has a great girl
CONGRATS!
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gillod knows my thoughts on my marriage.
that getting married after 17 is waiting too long? ;) :-*
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bad idea duder
Will you marry me? I have an extra bed just in case
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bad idea duder
Will you marry me? I have an extra bed just in case
you would sleep in a different bed than your wife?
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bad idea duder
Well, not everyone is gonna act the way you did, you know.
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Lemme be the first to say...
STICK IT IN HER POOPER!
:-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-*
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bad idea duder
Well, not everyone is gonna act the way you did, you know.
You have no idea how I acted.
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Yeah, you were very secretive of the whole matter, redwood. :shh
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for some reason i think the way she acted on the forums and in real life were quite different.
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hurr bailout.gif hurr
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Listen to whiteACID lol
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Well let me be the 5th person or whatever to congratulate you. I think it's a beautiful thing to be engaged and it's sad that those closest to you aren't being supportive. Hopefully once you've been engaged for a while, they'll come around.
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Well, my fiancee and I needed to make it official to head into the Peace Corps together. Ever since then, it's been. Fucked! I don't think more than 4 people have said, "Congratulations!". There have been a lot of "BAD IDEA UR DUMB!" from nearly every corner of my social circle, my mother keeps updating me on which of her friends think it's a bad idea. Isn't getting engaged supposed to be fun or relaxing? At the very least, it shouldn't be this stressful. Now the Peace Corps is swapping deadlines on us and our little European getaway got downsized to a Work-on-a-farm-for-free getaway has now become a Work-at-Applebee's-because-I-can't-afford-my-student-loans-away.
I feel great about getting engaged to a woman I adore and respect and love to death, but everything else since has been absolutely horrific.
uhm aren't you like in your early 20ies and still in college :-\
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Yeah, you were very secretive of the whole matter, redwood. :shh
She still is.
But don't do it!!! Getting engaged is suppsed to be fun and relaxing. Not a nightmare. Trust me.
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::)
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::)
Just answer me this miss acid. Was it your idea to get married?
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Anyway: I know it sounds like a business partnership. And that was the impetus for the marriage. Given the luxury of time, of course I wouldn't have gotten engaged yet. I'm 23, she's 21. We're young, crazy young. But I'm also not the kind of dude to just be LALA CRAZY IN LOVE LETS GET MARRIED.
There's no doubt in my mind that we'd marry eventually. Is that a crazy thing to say? A little, sure. But this is the most functional partnership, the most creative relationship, the most inspiring friendship I've ever been in. I don't believe in "TEH ONE 4 U", but she's got to be in the Top 5 Global Matches. Even if I didn't love her, I'd stick with her anyway: It's simply functional. We pick up each other's slack. The phrase "better half" has never rung so true.
I don't want you cats to think I'm rushing into this on a heady wave of youthful enthusiasm. I'd just ask that you trust my judgement. The real crux of the post was that this has been the most stressful time of an already stressful year. I feel like I can't tell anyone without getting yelled at. It's awful.
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As a general rule people shouldn't get married when they're young. But with all rules, there are exceptions. So if you two are rational mature adults who love each other, why not? Congratulations on the engagement and congratulations for finding someone you love so much.
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I hope this engagement will be as successful as Cloudwalking's
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i was 23 when i got married, and my wife was 19. we've been married for 10 years without any issues. i did hafta date a lot of fuck crazies before i discovered what i really wanted from a relationship, though.
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i was 23 when i got married, and my wife was 19. we've been married for 10 years without any issues. i did hafta date a lot of fuck crazies before i discovered what i really wanted from a relationship, though.
Drinky likes em young :-\
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:hyper
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If I may ask, how long did you know her/were dating her before you got married? Did you know her when she was say, 17?
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we dated for a little over a year before i proposed. she was 18 when we started dating and a freshman at the same university. i was friends with her older sister, who introduced us.
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Oh snaps, going right for the family jewels. Big sis no thanks, gimmie the red head!
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her older sister was already in a relationship, duder! >:(
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Ten years is good tho; congrats. My parents have been married for 20 years.
I'm not expert but when getting married it seems like it's easier to do when you're in a steady financial situation. Doesn't mean you have to be stacking g's, but not having to worry about finances early on would be one less potential problem. My parents got married when my dad was in med school and it was hella stressful. They succeeded in the end luckily, but I can imagine that's hard to do. I wouldn't consider getting married unless I was in a good, solid position. Assuming I ever get married :yuck
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financial stability is also important, and i'd also recommend waiting at least five years -- if not forever (lol egad drinky bad dad) -- to have kids. really, though, the most important thing is BE AWARE OF PRECISELY WHAT YOU WILL HAVE TO SACRIFICE. understand your potential lifetime partner to know exactly what you'll be giving up and to what extent that will impact you. some folks require very little; others require a great deal. know precisely where you stand, because if you don't, you'll be a bitter ball of resentment in five years. never, ever get married because you feel that it's what you "think you should do" or because of some vague external pressure from social expectations.
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gillod is very mature and his woman is a sweetheart.
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financial stability is also important, and i'd also recommend waiting at least five years -- if not forever (lol egad drinky bad dad) -- to have kids. really, though, the most important thing is BE AWARE OF PRECISELY WHAT YOU WILL HAVE TO SACRIFICE. understand your potential lifetime partner to know exactly what you'll be giving up and to what extent that will impact you. some folks require very little; others require a great deal. know precisely where you stand, because if you don't, you'll be a bitter ball of resentment in five years. never, ever get married because you feel that it's what you "think you should do" or because of some vague external pressure from social expectations.
Could you explain more what you mean here?
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assuming that was a sincere request -- i never can tell with republicans -- i'll summarize:
you partner has expectations for you. you too have expectations for your partner. some are easily articulated; some are very much NOT easily articulated. you need to know what you want from life and be able to look down that long, long road and see if having your life coupled to another person's -- and the attendant compromise and responsibility thereof -- fits with what you REALLY want in the long- and short-term. do you expect to watch porno all night? do you expect her not to see old flames on the sly? you really can't have your cake and eat it too. liars don't have happy relationships.
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liars don't have happy relationships.
I dunno, G looks pretty happy to me! I just wish he'd tell Roxy to put her wig on :-\
(http://img114.imageshack.us/img114/7041/obesemened2.jpg)
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One of the things we really talked about going into this was... The myth of a self-perpetuating love. People go into marriage assuming that LOVE WILL LIFT US UP WHERE WE BELONG. Being in love is like any other project, you have to work on it. You can't expect it to just roll forward on it's own good intentions. We're both rational, thinking people and we don't assume that being in love will be enough.
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can i text message you? :heartbeat
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can i text message you? :heartbeat
My phone got stoled :(
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can i text message you? :heartbeat
My phone got stoled :(
oh wtf? does mary have a number I can text message you guys at?
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can i text message you? :heartbeat
My phone got stoled :(
Haha, you still haven't gotten a new phone since the drug dealer ran off with it?
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can i text message you? :heartbeat
My phone got stoled :(
Haha, you still haven't gotten a new phone since the drug dealer ran off with it?
No, the one after that got stoled, too. Also, Raoul Duke played in the town I'm living in like 5 times in the last 3 months. Should I have seen him?
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can i text message you? :heartbeat
My phone got stoled :(
Haha, you still haven't gotten a new phone since the drug dealer ran off with it?
No, the one after that got stoled, too. Also, Raoul Duke played in the town I'm living in like 5 times in the last 3 months. Should I have seen him?
I dunno, but probably not. I, however, am going to see The Black Keys and Dinosaur Jr. on the 21st. I also saw The Black Lips and Blonde Redhead last month.
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assuming that was a sincere request -- i never can tell with republicans -- i'll summarize:
you partner has expectations for you. you too have expectations for your partner. some are easily articulated; some are very much NOT easily articulated. you need to know what you want from life and be able to look down that long, long road and see if having your life coupled to another person's -- and the attendant compromise and responsibility thereof -- fits with what you REALLY want in the long- and short-term. do you expect to watch porno all night? do you expect her not to see old flames on the sly? you really can't have your cake and eat it too. liars don't have happy relationships.
No it was sincere; this has nothing to do with politics, it's more about my own personal life, which is why I was interested. What were some of the concerns/needs you two expressed in this regard (if I may ask)? Some of the stuff you're referring to above (ie watching porno) are things you work-out living together in the first place (if you choose to do that before getting engaged/married/knocked-up/etc, which ideally I would/have)
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I definitely want to be financially stable before I even think of getting married. At this rate though, I'll be in my sixties. :-\