THE BORE

General => Video Game Bored => Topic started by: TVC15 on June 09, 2007, 04:43:25 PM

Title: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: TVC15 on June 09, 2007, 04:43:25 PM
Only those interested in a TRUE GAMER CHALLENGE should apply.

I propose that we get willing participants to each play a shitty JRPG, racing each other to completion.  The winner gets to be the homojapual queen of Evilbore.  Since some of us have jobs, I propose that a key rule be that participants are not allowed to play more than 5 hours a day. 

Another rule:  participants need to be able to offer photographic evidence of their completion of the game and how long it took.

Also, once participants are selected, a game should be picked that none of them have yet played.  And it must be bad.

Anyone interested?  Any suggestions for further rules?
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: demi on June 09, 2007, 04:46:51 PM
I think Prole wins with his Ar Tornelico entry
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Junpei the Tracer! on June 09, 2007, 04:47:29 PM
I'd like to do this.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Vizzys on June 09, 2007, 04:47:56 PM
I'm near finishing mother 3

sadly it does not qualify, being the best gba rpg ever made.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: MrAngryFace on June 09, 2007, 04:48:07 PM
--
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Van Cruncheon on June 09, 2007, 04:49:14 PM
i'm en route to an atelier iris 3 victory!
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: TVC15 on June 09, 2007, 04:52:21 PM
COME ON, VOLUNTEER!

Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Vizzys on June 09, 2007, 05:01:25 PM
Well I just started kingdom hearts 2 and ive put less then 3 hours into it, would that count?

Thats all I gots
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Yeti on June 09, 2007, 05:04:47 PM
I would but money is rather tight at the moment.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Fragamemnon on June 09, 2007, 05:08:14 PM
So I went to gamerankings looking for the shittiest console RPG I could find. Thanks to shitty console game reviewers and their affect on aggregation, I couldn't find anything.

I do have a copy of Ephemeral Fantasia I never played. Low-res PS2 graphics and big ol animu tatas-will that work?
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Fragamemnon on June 09, 2007, 05:09:39 PM
I have a free rental for whatever at blockbuster. Make me a suggestion!
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: demi on June 09, 2007, 05:13:24 PM
Tales of Legendia, Frag
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Himu on June 09, 2007, 05:13:25 PM
Actually, the best console rpgs are some of the ones with the more low scores, funnilly enough.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Fragamemnon on June 09, 2007, 05:16:22 PM
Tales of Legendia, Frag

I hate even the GOOD tales games (I have ToD1/ToD2 in mint condition somewhere in a box for the PSOne, hated them). That doesn't sound like a bad choice, it definitely fits a key feature of the contest, IMO-you should go into the contest hating or being biased against the game beforehand.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: TakingBackSunday on June 09, 2007, 05:26:43 PM
FFXII?
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: BlackMage on June 09, 2007, 05:40:37 PM
grandia II, tales of legendia? these are the only 2 i haven't finished yet from my library. both ps2
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Himu on June 09, 2007, 05:46:18 PM
Please do not lump Grandia in with this. That is insulting.

It should be a tales game.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: demi on June 09, 2007, 06:09:51 PM
So can we get a list of shitty JRPGs? You can't pick something like FFXII because that at least has some quality going for it. We need genuine shit JRPGs.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Himu on June 09, 2007, 06:11:58 PM
Magna Carta.

Oh, that's Korean, but does it really matter.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: demi on June 09, 2007, 06:12:15 PM
I'm willing to play a Suikoden game.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Himu on June 09, 2007, 06:14:32 PM
Shush.  :P
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Junpei the Tracer! on June 09, 2007, 06:15:15 PM
lol.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Yeti on June 09, 2007, 06:39:24 PM
Does Contact count?
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: TVC15 on June 09, 2007, 06:48:21 PM
Magna Carta may actually be a good choice.  The combat is really tedious and needlessly difficult, so it's not the sort of game where you can easily power level and cool young dude yourself out.  Demi plays a lot of shit games, so he's probably good at minmaxing.  This would throw him for a loop.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Van Cruncheon on June 09, 2007, 07:10:34 PM
tales of legendia is good, too. and the three xenosaga games.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: The Sceneman on June 09, 2007, 07:31:39 PM
Does Contact count?

It only takes 10 hours to complete so no
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Himu on June 09, 2007, 07:32:04 PM
Xenosaga is too punishing due to the cutscenes.

but it has loli rape
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 12:36:03 AM
I want to do this.  Can we choose a relatively recent game, though?  That way it will be easier for me to get.  And please, not Magna Carta, I played it at a friend's house and it was shit.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: The Fake Shemp on June 10, 2007, 12:45:19 AM
All I have is a Xbox 360, so I can't play :(
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 12:51:42 AM
You don't have a PS2?  I'm kinda shocked.  I thought everyone had one by now.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: The Fake Shemp on June 10, 2007, 01:12:47 AM
I sold off all my old systems - I'm living in the future!
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: demi on June 10, 2007, 01:27:08 AM
All I have is a Xbox 360, so I can't play :(

Enchanted Arms
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 01:27:53 AM
I sold off all my old systems - I'm living in the future!

Did you sell off all your old games too?  :(
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Himu on June 10, 2007, 01:29:30 AM
All I have is a Xbox 360, so I can't play :(

Enchanted Arms

Isn't htat supposed to be pretty decent?
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: demi on June 10, 2007, 01:40:05 AM
Did you play it?
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Himu on June 10, 2007, 01:44:32 AM
That's why I asked.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 01:48:58 AM
I think we should stick to PS2 games since that's the console most folks have...also, I don't have a 360.  :'(

Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Junpei the Tracer! on June 10, 2007, 01:50:10 AM
All I have is a Xbox 360, so I can't play :(

Enchanted Arms

Shush you.Enchanted Arms isn't half bad.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: demi on June 10, 2007, 01:56:01 AM
That's why I asked.

Go play it yourself, faygele
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Himu on June 10, 2007, 01:56:53 AM
I would if I could!
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: tiesto on June 10, 2007, 02:14:56 AM
I've got an unopened copy of Enchanted Arms, this'd give me an excuse to attempt to play it. How about Wild Arms 3, would that be a good option?
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Mr. Gundam on June 10, 2007, 02:27:21 AM
I've got a bunch of JRPGs I've yet to start, I'm game.

PS2
Metal Saga
Code Age Commanders (JP)
Shadow Hearts: To the New World
Suikoden V
SMT: Devil Summoner

PS3
Enchanted Arms
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 02:29:04 AM
None of those games seem nearly japalicious enough for this thread, distantmantra.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: demi on June 10, 2007, 02:39:25 AM
Shadow Hearts is amazing, that is exempt
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Mr. Gundam on June 10, 2007, 02:45:00 AM
What about Code Age Commanders? It's a shitty third-tier Square Enix title!

And, since it's Japanese, we can make up a plot for it!!
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 03:05:48 AM
Do you honestly think anybody here is going to bother importing a third-tier Square Enix Japan-only title?  I mean, besides you and me? (I loved the Code Age Commanders trailers, btw, dunno why the game turned out to be so bad)

I personally think Ar tonelico is like, perfect for this...it's covers all the basis for a japafag game extravaganza.  And I think they had the limited edition at Messe Sanoh (import game store) when I was there last.  They also had Valkyrie Profile 2: Silmeria, and Disgaea 2, so I would be up for either of those as well, though they sound to be a bit too high quality to qualify.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Himu on June 10, 2007, 03:07:53 AM
Valkyrie Profile STAYS THE FUCK OUT OF THIS
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: demi on June 10, 2007, 03:08:41 AM
No, the first one would be an excellent choice

It's my personal worst RPG I've ever played
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Mr. Gundam on June 10, 2007, 03:09:19 AM
Do you honestly think anybody here is going to bother importing a third-tier Square Enix Japan-only title?  I mean, besides you and me? (I loved the Code Age Commanders trailers, btw, dunno why the game turned out to be so bad)

You're probably right, but it was only $10 at Yes-Asia when I bought it in January. Yodobashi Akiba had it for 500 yen this past July, but for some reason I didn't buy it.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 03:12:31 AM
What about the first Atelier Iris?  I've never played that one, and it's available.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Mr. Gundam on June 10, 2007, 03:19:01 AM
I have the first Atelier Iris game, but I've never played it. I refuse to buy the next two unless I beat this one and actually enjoy it.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 03:20:09 AM
I can get my hands on Atelier Iris for cheap, too...

How about it, Evilboreans?  Why don't we play Atelier Iris in the RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY?
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: tiesto on June 10, 2007, 10:35:39 AM
Actually Ar Tonelico sounds like a perfect game for this... If we're voting on which game to play, put me down for that one. I haven't bought the game yet tho.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: BlackMage on June 10, 2007, 11:53:41 AM
we should poll this sucker with like 3 different games and see which one has the most votes.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Van Cruncheon on June 10, 2007, 12:10:46 PM
dm, 2 and 3 really aren't like 1. 2 and 3 are much more typical RPGs.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 12:30:13 PM
So the nominees so far are Ar tonelico, Atelier Iris, anything else?
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: bork on June 10, 2007, 12:42:45 PM
FINAL FANTASY DIRGE OF CEREBRUS

Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Van Cruncheon on June 10, 2007, 12:45:20 PM
i nominate tales of legendia and star ocean 3
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 12:47:28 PM
I was about to say FF games shouldn't qualify but then I remembered that  it features Okinawan rock singer and pretend vampire Gackt in an important role.  So, yeah...

1. Atelier Iris
2. Ar tonelico
3. Final Fantasy VII: Dirge of Cerberus
4. Tales of Legendia (I actually already own this game, lolz, but I haven't started playing it)
5. Star Ocean 3
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Van Cruncheon on June 10, 2007, 12:52:25 PM
ephemeral fantasia is also a good choice (although i liked that game), and the godawful suikoden 4
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Van Cruncheon on June 10, 2007, 12:53:25 PM
oh, and of course MAGNA CARTA.

for handheld only games: blade dancer and legend of heroes 2 on the psp are particularly tedious. astonishia story is there for the truly masochistic (it, like magna carta, is wacky korea-y, but hey, they're trying really hard to mimic the worst of jappy rpg cliches). on the ds, there's tao's adventure, the worst roguelike i've have hard the misfortune of trying to play, ever.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 12:54:19 PM
But Magna Carta is shitty. :(
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Van Cruncheon on June 10, 2007, 12:56:37 PM
so are tales of legendia and atelier iris 1! dirge of cerberus isn't even an rpg -- it's some sort of fps-action game hybrid.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 12:58:16 PM
Yeah, but Magna Carta is shitty and frustrating.  I hear Tales of Legendia is pretty easy to breeze through, so at least I wouldn't have to suffer while playing it.  I'm not a masochist. :/
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Van Cruncheon on June 10, 2007, 01:01:00 PM
i think i'll take another stab at atelier iris 1, since it's only like a 20 hour game, whereas legendia is 50. :-\
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 01:03:27 PM
Oh, shit...fifty?

Okay, I vote for Atelier Iris.

When should we start the RACE?  I guess we should wait to hear from everybody else so they can vote what game they want to play.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: TVC15 on June 10, 2007, 04:32:53 PM
Yeah, but Magna Carta is shitty and frustrating.  I hear Tales of Legendia is pretty easy to breeze through, so at least I wouldn't have to suffer while playing it.  I'm not a masochist. :/

We are kind of looking for shitty.  And Legendia is really awful, too.  It has a simplified, awful version of the Symphonia system and (from what I saw) has a plat that makes Tales of the Abyss look like Joyce.  And it has cheesy music. 
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Mr. Gundam on June 10, 2007, 04:33:58 PM
I vote Atelier Iris I, I'm not buying any more shitty games than I already own.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Van Cruncheon on June 10, 2007, 04:34:54 PM
legendia is at least linear and easy, and it's available for like $10 *everywhere*. plus it has a translation from john_tv's translation house, if i recall correctly, back when YOU KNOW WHO worked there!

atelier iris 1 is a little harder to find, and probably goes for a bit more. besides, what's a race without a little sweat?

i vote LEGENDIA.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: tiesto on June 10, 2007, 05:45:52 PM
Hmm... right now put my votes for either Ar Tonelico or Legendia. Oh yeah, I've seen Astonisha Story at Sears for like $10, so that might be something to think about, too...
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Junpei the Tracer! on June 10, 2007, 06:16:19 PM
Do Legendia because I'm broke.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 06:25:13 PM
Votes so far...

Atelier Iris - 3

Tales of Legendia - 3 (one vote might be changed to Ar tonelico)
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Mr. Gundam on June 10, 2007, 07:55:09 PM
I refuse to buy another crappy JRPG, and I hate Tales games, so it's Atelier Iris for me or nothing.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Van Cruncheon on June 10, 2007, 08:02:14 PM
i own neither, but i do own ephemeral fantasia, so i'll play that in the spirit of camaraderie

Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Mr. Gundam on June 10, 2007, 08:17:49 PM
I'll probably suffer through Code Age Commanders if the EB collective consciousness chooses something other than AI.

I still think that everyone playing CAC would be awesome, we could make up some horribly awesome storyline to replace whatever inane anime pap the developers came up with.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Junpei the Tracer! on June 10, 2007, 08:31:46 PM
Code Age isn't half bad.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Nikashi on June 10, 2007, 10:02:02 PM
You could make this a REAL fucking test and make the game Beyond the Beyond. If you can make it more than 4 hours in you're a god or have zero taste in gaming.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Junpei the Tracer! on June 10, 2007, 10:54:56 PM
What system is it for?
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Mr. Gundam on June 10, 2007, 11:05:15 PM
What system is it for?

Playstation
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Ichirou on June 10, 2007, 11:22:18 PM
You could make this a REAL fucking test and make the game Beyond the Beyond. If you can make it more than 4 hours in you're a god or have zero taste in gaming.

Beyond the Beyond is just shitty, not particularly wacky jappy.  For wacky jappy stuff, you have to have a few elements: large-breasted animu girls (and/or disturbingly loli ones), cheesy dialogue and storyline worthy of a Saturday morning TV show, bizarre and perhaps counterintuitive gameplay, and garishly colorful graphics.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: TVC15 on June 11, 2007, 03:02:56 AM
I've beaten Beyond the Beyond.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: BlueTsunami on June 11, 2007, 03:22:42 AM
Oh god...I remember Beyond the Beyond

Oh god

Although, I actually liked the critical hits you could get if you timed your button presses right
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Howard Alan Treesong on June 11, 2007, 03:22:54 AM
legendia is at least linear and easy, and it's available for like $10 *everywhere*. plus it has a translation from john_tv's translation house, if i recall correctly, back when YOU KNOW WHO worked there!

atelier iris 1 is a little harder to find, and probably goes for a bit more. besides, what's a race without a little sweat?

i vote LEGENDIA.

Legendia has really good characterization and really atrocious plotting.

If you make it Ar Tonelico I will participate.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Fragamemnon on June 11, 2007, 03:31:26 AM
I'd like to say that if the game is too long, I'll probably pass. 50 hours is a good 10 days of gaming and, as much as I like the idea of testing my HOMOJAPUALITY, I rather not get trapped in something that will be a huge endeavour.

So 20-25 hour games would be a lot more appealing.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: PhoenixWright on June 11, 2007, 09:47:09 AM
I think Prole wins with his Ar Tornelico entry
i'm en route to an atelier iris 3 victory!
It should be a tales game.
Don't confuse "bad game" with "masterpiece." Unless that "Tales game" is Legendia.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Van Cruncheon on June 11, 2007, 12:36:28 PM
i have a spare copy of odin sphere for you, frag! PM me yer address!
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Mr. Gundam on June 11, 2007, 05:40:52 PM
I've yet to buy Odin Sphere, I'm afraid it will just sit and collect dust with the rest of my mega backlog.
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: demi on June 11, 2007, 05:41:26 PM
wah wah wah, I bought the game too and its still sealed!
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: Robo on June 11, 2007, 05:57:33 PM
If we're gonna do Odin Sphere, I'll get in on this mess. 
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: The Sceneman on June 11, 2007, 07:40:35 PM
OMG the game just came out today and I havent played it yet I cant believe IGN only gave this a 7.4 what were they thinking GAF overhype confirmed Gamespots 8.05 is a much fairer score although it deserves a 9.1
Title: Re: I propose -- THE RACE TO HOMOJAPUALITY
Post by: bluemax on June 11, 2007, 07:49:35 PM
I've got saves near the start of the following:

DQ3
Vagrant Story
SMT DDS1

off the top of my head. I also have a copy of Suikoden lieing around that I gave up on after an hour.

Blah when I go home I'll make a list of what I have, but I also have Gamefly and a bunch of JRPGs that I keep pushing to the bottom of my queue.

I think for me I'd have a better chance of finishing if the game is portable or emulatable since I almost never play games at home now.