Official MLB Thread, sponsored by Cajole's imminent suicide

[CajoleJuice]

Let's get this going.

[Flannel Boy]

2-9

how 'bout them Braves, Triumph?

[Phoenix Dark]

People are suiciding here. I don't even like baseball at all but even I'm interested in this meltdown. Sports radio is hilarious. I'm used to this during the NFL season 

[CajoleJuice]

YOU MOTHERFUCKER. 

Your fault for not making the thread!

I'll change it over the course of the season. Maybe I should change it to 2-9, but 0-7 has a better ring to it.

[Joe Molotov]

I'm just glad the Rangers haven't been mathematically eliminated from the playoffs yet. 5-5, yeeeeah!

[Flannel Boy]

Cabrera isn't even hitting his weight. But the last MLB player to hit Cabera's weight was Ted Williams. 

[CajoleJuice]

Joba just called A-Rod a homosexual.

And Tim McCarver said Beckett has a huge dick.

[Flannel Boy]

Time to get Rob Deer back. At least he could hit .200, unlike Cabrera. 

[Joe Molotov]

Cabrera isn't even hitting his weight. But the last MLB player to hit Cabera's weight was Ted Williams. 

$150 Million well spent! 

[Flannel Boy]

That's like half a million per pound. 

[Flannel Boy]

They should have signed Jeff Gerstmann. Have you watched him play will sports?

[Phoenix Dark]

FA do you listen to any local sports radio shows?

[Flannel Boy]

hahahaha Rob Deer.  The early 90's Tigers must've had more strikeouts than any team ever.

Time to get Sparky Anderson back. 

As a Blue Jays fan, I always made sure to watch every game they played against the Tigers in the late 80's and early 90's. I loved Tiger Stadium, Fielder, and all the K's Toronto pitchers would pile up.

[Phoenix Dark]

PD:  I don't listen to any radio program at all.  Is there any that I could get off itunes/winamp or stream online?  I wouldn't mind hearing others suiciding along with me.

 

http://www.971theticket.com/pages/1182064.php

and WDFN for Stony and Wojo
http://www.wdfn.com/main.html

[Rman]

Yay, a baseball thread on EB.

[Flannel Boy]

Yay, a baseball thread on EB.

If it's like the basketball thread, it will get two posts a week.

[Rman]

Baseball has a longer season with more ups and downs.

[Phoenix Dark]

I need a few bandwagons to jump on to supplement my Tigers frustration.  The D-backs are doing pretty well...

I'm looking for a bandwagon as well, but for the NBA playoffs. I'm leaning towards the Suns

[Flannel Boy]

I need a few bandwagons to jump on to supplement my Tigers frustration.  The D-backs are doing pretty well...

I'm looking for a bandwagon as well, but for the NBA playoffs. I'm leaning towards the Suns

Whom will they face in the first round? I don't like their chances against either the Spurs or the Jazz! Steve Nash is looking like an old man ou there.

[Phoenix Dark]

I need a few bandwagons to jump on to supplement my Tigers frustration.  The D-backs are doing pretty well...

I'm looking for a bandwagon as well, but for the NBA playoffs. I'm leaning towards the Suns

Whom will they face in the first round? I don't like their chances against either the Spurs or the Jazz! Steve Nash is looking like an old man ou there.

True true true. I think they could pull off an upset but we'll see. If they go out in the first round the Shaq trade will look even worse. This is their year. Shaq was put in a good position of not having to play a full season with them, but next year expect him to be hurt and hobbled up again

[Joe Molotov]

I need a few bandwagons to jump on to supplement my Tigers frustration.  The D-backs are doing pretty well...

I'm looking for a bandwagon as well, but for the NBA playoffs. I'm leaning towards the Suns

You should get on board with the Mavericks. Nobody expects them to do anything this year, so you'll be like the guy that picked the Giants to win the Superbowl if they win it all. The Jason Kidd experiment, man, it's finally coming together.

[Phoenix Dark]

I need a few bandwagons to jump on to supplement my Tigers frustration.  The D-backs are doing pretty well...

I'm looking for a bandwagon as well, but for the NBA playoffs. I'm leaning towards the Suns

You should get on board with the Mavericks. Nobody expects them to do anything this year, so you'll be like the guy that picked the Giants to win the Superbowl if they win it all. The Jason Kidd experiment, man, it's finally coming together.

Clearly you don't know of my Dirk hate, which extends to the Mavs

[Joe Molotov]

I need a few bandwagons to jump on to supplement my Tigers frustration.  The D-backs are doing pretty well...

I'm looking for a bandwagon as well, but for the NBA playoffs. I'm leaning towards the Suns

You should get on board with the Mavericks. Nobody expects them to do anything this year, so you'll be like the guy that picked the Giants to win the Superbowl if they win it all. The Jason Kidd experiment, man, it's finally coming together.

Clearly you don't know of my Dirk hate, which extends to the Mavs

Did you see Dirk sink that last second 3-pointer to beat the Jazz the other night?

Oh wait, this is a baseball thread, isn't it?

[CajoleJuice]

Stop shitting up my thread.

[Phoenix Dark]

HIMU LEVEL FAIL 

[Joe Molotov]

Man, I can't believe Fred Couples didn't make the cut yesterday.  23 cuts in a row, but he is almost 50 so I guess it had to happen eventually.

[Mr. Gundam]

I went to the Nationals-Braves game in D.C. last night. It was a pretty uneventful game, but we had a nice time, and the stadium is really nice. Safeco Field is much better, but Nationals Stadium is a good place to catch a game.

With that said, go M's! Stick it to the Angels again tonight!

edit: Also, I was on the Metro this morning and overheard some stupid teenager whining about how the Seahawks pump in canned noise to Qwest Field, which is the only reason why we beat the Redskins. I really wanted to respond, but I thought better of it.

[CajoleJuice]

Matt Cain and Dan Haren are kicking total ass for my fantasy team right now. Fueling a massive comeback for me.

[Phoenix Dark]

Oh, Detroit has won 2 games? I didn't know that lol; just checked the standings 

[Grecco]

Atlanta lit up the Nats.

This is the year Franc takes the next step and becomes a major player

[Flannel Boy]

Atlanta lit up the Nats.

This is the year Franc takes the next step and becomes a major player

He might even get a few walks this year!

[CajoleJuice]

Atlanta lit up the Nats.

This is the year Franc takes the next step and becomes a major player

We'll see about that.

And Raul Ibanez is carrying my fantasy team. WTF

[Human Snorenado]

Atlanta lit up the Nats.

This is the year Franc takes the next step and becomes a major player

He might even get a few walks this year!

Walking is for queers and Saber-Nerds.  Real men hit home runs or strike out swinging at pitches headed towards the on deck circle.

Also, HOW ABOUT THAT JOHAN SANTANA?  lolmets

[CajoleJuice]

OH MY GOD HE'S HUMAN THE SKY IS FALLING

The guy's WHIP is still under 1.

[Human Snorenado]

OH MY GOD HE'S HUMAN THE SKY IS FALLING

The guy's WHIP is still under 1.

Smoltz 2-0 0.84 ERA
Hudson 2-0 2.14 ERA
Johan 1-2 3.05 ERA

lolololololol

Altho, what is sad is that I just realized that between them Hudson and Smoltz have 4 of the Braves' 5 wins.  :-/

[CajoleJuice]

OH MY GOD HE'S HUMAN THE SKY IS FALLING

The guy's WHIP is still under 1.

Smoltz 2-0 0.84 ERA
Hudson 2-0 2.14 ERA
Johan 1-2 3.05 ERA

lolololololol

Altho, what is sad is that I just realized that between them Hudson and Smoltz have 4 of the Braves' 5 wins.  :-/

Oliver Perez 1-0 0.00 ERA

[bluemax]ERA sucks anyway[/bluemax]

[Grecco]

Atlanta lit up the Nats.

This is the year Franc takes the next step and becomes a major player

He might even get a few walks this year!

Walking is for queers and Saber-Nerds.  Real men hit home runs or strike out swinging at pitches headed towards the on deck circle.

Also, HOW ABOUT THAT JOHAN SANTANA?  lolmets

Well i guess i better start Saber-Nerd defense force. Cause i love me some walks


Johan will be fine. Its still april.

[ferrarimanf355]

Go Marlins! 

spoiler (click to show/hide)

We need that fucking stadium, but it's not suprising that we're getting fucked over it, again...  :'(

[close]

[Flannel Boy]

You don't deserve a stadium and you don't deserve a franchise. In fact, all sports franchises should be moved out of Florida. Worst fans ever!

[Human Snorenado]

Atlanta lit up the Nats.

This is the year Franc takes the next step and becomes a major player

He might even get a few walks this year!

Walking is for queers and Saber-Nerds.  Real men hit home runs or strike out swinging at pitches headed towards the on deck circle.

Also, HOW ABOUT THAT JOHAN SANTANA?  lolmets

Well i guess i better start Saber-Nerd defense force. Cause i love me some walks


Johan will be fine. Its still april.

I was speaking in the voice of one Jeffrey Francoeur. 

Also, HOW ABOUT THAT YUNEL ESCOBAR?  You sure do hate that guy for no apparent reason, considering his readily apparent AWESOMENESS.

[ferrarimanf355]

You don't deserve a stadium and you don't deserve a franchise. In fact, all sports franchises should be moved out of Florida. Worst fans ever!

[Grecco]

Kelly Johnson>Yunel Escobar

[CajoleJuice]

OH MY GOD HE'S HUMAN THE SKY IS FALLING

The guy's WHIP is still under 1.

Smoltz 2-0 0.84 ERA
Hudson 2-0 2.14 ERA
Johan 1-2 3.05 ERA

lolololololol

Altho, what is sad is that I just realized that between them Hudson and Smoltz have 4 of the Braves' 5 wins.  :-/

Oliver Perez 1-0 0.00 ERA

[bluemax]ERA sucks anyway[/bluemax]

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

fuck

[Human Snorenado]

Kelly Johnson>Yunel Escobar

KJ- .706 ops
Yunel- .945 ops

Seems so!  Seriously, your dislike of Escobar has been completely irrational, since day 1 he's produced and continues to do so, as opposed to KJ (who I do like) who is streaky as hell.

[Grecco]

Kelly Johnson>Yunel Escobar

KJ- .706 ops
Yunel- .945 ops

Seems so!  Seriously, your dislike of Escobar has been completely irrational, since day 1 he's produced and continues to do so, as opposed to KJ (who I do like) who is streaky as hell.

its been what a week and a half? Betcha KJ is in the .900s and Esco is in the .700s by the end of the year Lili is the future at SS but im getting the feeling Wren will deal him either to the White Sox for Javy Vazquez or to the Blue Jays for AJ Burnett at the Trade deadline

[Human Snorenado]

Kelly Johnson>Yunel Escobar

KJ- .706 ops
Yunel- .945 ops

Seems so!  Seriously, your dislike of Escobar has been completely irrational, since day 1 he's produced and continues to do so, as opposed to KJ (who I do like) who is streaky as hell.

its been what a week and a half? Betcha KJ is in the .900s and Esco is in the .700s by the end of the year Lili is the future at SS but im getting the feeling Wren will deal him either to the White Sox for Javy Vazquez or to the Blue Jays for AJ Burnett at the Trade deadline

I will take that bet, sir.  Honestly I expect both of them to end up in the .850 neighborhood.  I definitely expect Kelly to improve, but I think that Escobar is far more capable than you give him credit for.  And if I were Wren I would pull the trigger on the Vasquez trade.

[ferrarimanf355]

Anybody watching the Yanks and the Sawx?

[CajoleJuice]

Yes. P-Hug No Future CONFIRMED

[Mupepe]

Houston 5, Florida 1

YOUR STATE SUCKS HIMURO

[ferrarimanf355]

Houston 5, Florida 1

YOUR STATE SUCKS HIMURO

:'(

[ferrarimanf355]

DICE-K AM GOD. 
  YANKS 

[Phoenix Dark]

I was listening to the radio and the hosts were arguing that bringing Barry Bonds in might save the Tigers

[Flannel Boy]

I'd take Barry.  Fuck chemistry, it's already ruined.

If the Tigers need chemistry, I'm sure he can bring his own special chemistry set with him. 

[CajoleJuice]

DAVID WRIGHT

And Duaner Sanchez is back, bitches!

[Rman]

Wow, the Yanks actually beat the Devil Rays two games in a row.  Hell must be freezing over.

[Human Snorenado]

I fucking wash my hands of this Braves team.  Simply horrible. 

Hopefully we'll at least beat the Mets when we play them.  Petty vengeance is all I have to look forward to this year.

I'm picking the Royals as my secondary team to root for.  At least they're over .500.  GO ROYALS!!!

[CajoleJuice]

I fucking wash my hands of this Braves team.  Simply horrible. 

Hopefully we'll at least beat the Mets when we play them.  Petty vengeance is all I have to look forward to this year.

I'm picking the Royals as my secondary team to root for.  At least they're over .500.  GO ROYALS!!!

Oh come on, Triumph. I think they'll pull together a respectable season at the very least.

[CajoleJuice]

Thread needs a new title. 

Done.

[Powerslave]

baseball

[The Fake Shemp]

Just came back from the A's/Mariners game tonight with CrystalGemini.  We waited an hour in line for $1 hot dogs (we ordered five per person!), only to find them barely cooked at mediocre room temperature!  Also, Oakland lost.  What bums.  The only good thing was that they gave out free fleece throws and the Colliseum attracts a crazy unbalanced ratio of attractive, young women to a mish-mash of men in their late 20s to 50s.  I can only guess that the guys are there trying to live vicariously through their favorite team members and the women go there to see the hot baseball players.