GODdamn hemorrhoid is rearing it's ugly head once again.

[fistfulofmetal]

I thought I had rid my self of the vile beast 3 months ago, but the little fucker is back.

But I'm prepared this time. My crack is lathered in anti-hemorrhoidal cream. Have fun growing under such hostile conditions you piece of shit.

[drohne]

Have fun growing under such hostile conditions you piece of shit.

is this you addressing the hemorrhoid or the hemorrhoid addressing a piece of shit

[TVC15]

Do hemorrhoids go away or are you afflicted for life once you get them?  At what age do they show up?  They kinda terrify me because I like my hot tight ass.

[Phoenix Dark]

protip: don't google image search hemorrhoid  :'(

I have a couple but they don't cause discomfort; I'd have to directly stimulate them (say with a finger) to feel anything, whereas sitting/squatting/etc isn't a problem

[fistfulofmetal]

Do hemorrhoids go away or are you afflicted for life once you get them?  At what age do they show up?  They kinda terrify me because I like my hot tight ass.

it's from either shitting too hard, or not getting enough fiber.
also from waiting too long to shit thus it's a horde of poo coming out, and your butt can't handle it.

A blood vessel bursts and BAM you got yourself a nice inflamed friend for the next week or so. So the only way to get one again is to do the dumb shit you did to get it before. (like I did )


and unlike PD, mine hurts like big red balls. It's like just continual unrest. Like someone is forever sticking something sharp into your brown eye.

[BobFromPikeCreek]

I thought you could also get hemorrhoids from sitting on cold, hard surfaces for too long. I think I had one once. It was no biggie.

[TakingBackSunday]

Had one for a while, but it went away thankfully.  Most uncomfortable I've ever been for an entire week.

[Tauntaun]

I thought I had rid my self of the vile beast 3 months ago, but the little fucker is back.

But I'm prepared this time. My crack is lathered in anti-hemorrhoidal cream. Have fun growing under such hostile conditions you piece of shit.

That's brutal.

[hyp]

you guys need more veggies

[Tauntaun]

^  anyone else get a boner? 

[Joe Molotov]

lol, "rear" 

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I had a fissure once, and it was my like my butthole was on fire every time I took a dump for like 6 months.  :'(

[close]

[Madrun Badrun]

Haha fegs, I've never had a hemorrhoid and I have double the chances of getting one!

[huckleberry]

Haha distinguished effete fellows, I've never had a hemorrhoid and I have double the chances of getting one!

You have two assholes?

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Call me. 

[close]

[Kestastrophe]

I had a hemorroid when I was only 19 years old  :'(

But thankfully they don't bother me, other than an abnormally itchy asshole

[CurseoftheGods]

Can a hemorrhoid pop or burst?

[Bildi]

And do they occur outside your butthole or can they actually occur inside?  I was under the impression they can happen in your butt.

[Tristam]

The fuck? Am I the only one here who has never had one?

[fistfulofmetal]

Can a hemorrhoid pop or burst?

probably

And do they occur outside your butthole or can they actually occur inside?  I was under the impression they can happen in your butt.

both.
it's like a grape hanging off of your butthole when it's of the outside persuasion

[Kestastrophe]

I've only had the inside variety. The treatment was rather science-fictiony: The doctor essentially welded the little guy to my insides via laser. Having a laser in my ass was definitely a top ten experience for me.

[littlemathletics]

This thread is full of horror. I'm fond of my non-hemorrhoidal arse and would really prefer it to stay that way.

[fistfulofmetal]

I think I may be gaining an upper hand on this fucker. Yesterday the pain was fairly irritating, but today it's subdued.

So Pro-tip: Start using the cream before it even starts turning into a problem.