Author Topic: Conan the Barbarian: lol it's terrible! Wait...it's actually GOOD?! j/k it's bad (Read 1397 times)

Joe Molotov · « **on:** August 18, 2011, 01:04:23 PM »

39% and falling.

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Here's a movie that's simultaneously lavishly violent and numbing, visually ornate and undistinguished, epic and shallow, relentlessly noisy and tone-deaf, workmanlike and unfilling.

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Take away much of the myth, most of the sorcery and all of the humor of the 1982 John Milius-Arnold Schwarzenegger version of the sword and sorcery epic "Conan the Barbarian" and you've got an idea what the new "Conan" is like.

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[Momoa] barks and growls his dialogue with the unpracticed enthusiasm of a first-time Ren Fair performer.

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Conan the Barbarian seems to have little interest in '30s pulp stories, and only a little more in cheesy '80s epics.

Great Rumbler · « **Reply #1 on:** August 18, 2011, 01:31:22 PM »

I'm SHOCKED! Oh wait...no, I'm not.

Diunx · « **Reply #2 on:** August 18, 2011, 01:38:39 PM »

As long as it has tits and violence I'll watch it.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #3 on:** August 18, 2011, 01:41:39 PM »

and shirtless muscular men you mean.

Great Rumbler · « **Reply #4 on:** August 18, 2011, 01:45:19 PM »

Skip Conan, watch this instead:

[youtube=560,345]BCymwapudJ4[/youtube]

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #5 on:** August 18, 2011, 02:11:16 PM »

Quote from: Diunx on August 18, 2011, 01:38:39 PM

As long as it has tits and violence I'll watch it.

Just (re)watch Game of Thrones or Spartacus.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #6 on:** August 18, 2011, 02:33:24 PM »

Khal Drogo

bork · « **Reply #7 on:** August 18, 2011, 04:06:58 PM »

I want to see this, but I know it's going to suck. $:-\$

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #8 on:** August 18, 2011, 07:57:13 PM »

Momoa is awesome. I hope the film does good so he continues to have success.

[youtube=560,345]1-6_WRDROdM[/youtube]

Diunx · « **Reply #9 on:** August 19, 2011, 03:08:03 AM »

His this where drogo gets his first hair bells?

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #10 on:** August 20, 2011, 04:39:57 PM »

I was pumped when I first saw this preview, then I found out it was a Conan remake..

I was hoping it was GARSHASP THE MOVIE

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #11 on:** August 21, 2011, 10:03:40 AM »

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #12 on:** August 21, 2011, 11:28:36 AM »

Its totally garshasp, whatshisface was BORN TO BE GARSHASP

Great Rumbler · « **Reply #13 on:** August 21, 2011, 01:02:45 PM »

la bomba:

Conan the Barbarian
Opening weekend: $10,000,000
Budget: $90,000,000

spoiler (click to show/hide)

The original movie opened at $9.6 million in 1,400 theaters at a ticket price that was about 75% less.

[close]

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #14 on:** August 21, 2011, 01:38:14 PM »

holy shit

Cerveza mas fina · « **Reply #15 on:** August 23, 2011, 07:09:13 AM »

But everybody knows Khal Drogo :'(

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #16 on:** August 23, 2011, 11:26:12 AM »

They know that Khal Drogo likes 2 fuk

Smooth Groove · « **Reply #17 on:** August 23, 2011, 11:58:23 PM »

MAF, did you play Garshasp on the PC? It looks alright on youtube for a budget game.

etiolate · « **Reply #18 on:** August 24, 2011, 12:21:48 AM »

Quote from: Great Rumbler on August 18, 2011, 01:45:19 PM

Skip Conan, watch this instead:

[youtube=560,345]BCymwapudJ4[/youtube]

yes do this

Smooth Groove · « **Reply #19 on:** August 24, 2011, 12:34:44 AM »

Valhalla Rising was alright. Interesting concept but the symbolism and story meander aimlessly through the last 1/3. I just sorta lost interest.

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #20 on:** August 24, 2011, 01:12:51 AM »

Yes, played the first level- it was buggy at released but its been patched like crazy so I should go back to it.

News:

Author Topic: Conan the Barbarian: lol it's terrible! Wait...it's actually GOOD?! j/k it's bad (Read 1397 times)