The Bore Decides: What was the whitest sitcom of the 90s? (VICTOIRE)

[Human Snorenado]

This thing lost all legitimacy when Seinfeld got booted. ATTICA, ATTICA, ATTICA!

[benjipwns]

There's no two ways about it, Sex and the City is SUPER WHITE.

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  what kind of person makes this 

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A GOD AMONG MEN THAT'S WHO

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[larrydavid]

i mean obviously there's levels to this shit but at this point the finale only makes sense if we get to evaluate the names "kimmy gibler" and "chandler bing" against each other.

then again then there's also "six lemeure" and i assume something at the same level on the other show.

[Steve Contra]

[lennedsay]

The ass on Six though? It's the most black thing that's happened in all four of these shows.

[benjipwns]

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

I was hoping Mad About You would win.  So I nominate Friends.  Why?

1) David Schwimmer is a mopey, obnoxious character.  He's also a Jew.
2) Everyone on that show talked like a Valley Girl.  Most people these days talk like a Valley Girl and Friends was one of the big trojan horses for that:



3) They had U2 songs playing in the background sometimes.  U2 was the band CACs go to in order to feel "inspired" in the 90s until even shittier bands like Train and Nickelback took over in the 2000s.
4) They had a scene where some of the characters sang "Baby Got Back" which was a favorite of lame CACs in the 2000s.
5) Quirkiness for the sake of quirkiness.  Nobody else has time for that shit other than affluent NYC whites.

[benjipwns]

I thought it was Ally McBeal with the dancing baby.

[Human Snorenado]

The ass on Six though? It's the most black thing that's happened in all four of these shows.

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

I thought it was Ally McBeal with the dancing baby.

You're right.  I get these shitty TV shows confused sometimes.

[Yeti]

I've never seen Sex in the City, did they ever have sex with non-white people?

[benjipwns]

I've sadly seen most of it because of a lady friend. I remember the ladies doing exactly two black guys. I don't remember any other ethnicity but I didn't pay huge attention or see every episode in the middle of the series.

One was a sports doctor who got dumped because the one lesbian IRL realized she loved some other dude, so he got all angry and just disappeared from the show randomly. Then the other one Valeris is bangin and his sister gets all angry with him and he's all afraid of his sister and they all call him a pussy because he can't stand up to his sister.

Until the last seasons whoever Valeris was bangin was only around for an episode or two.

[benjipwns]

[pilonv1]

Wait Mad About You got knocked out?

[king of the internet]

All things said Full House v. Friends would be a pretty appropriate final match.  Choosing between the two will be tough, though.

[Howard Alan Treesong]

I'm sad to see Seinfeld go too, but let's be honest, a total lack of self-awareness re: your own privilege is a huge part of being The Ultimate Whitey. Seinfeld's ability to understand its characters are actually sociopathic assholes is what ultimately disqualifies it from taking the crown.

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#teamfriends

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[nudemacusers]

if friends doesn't make it to the finals i'm quitting this forum

[Great Rumbler]

I'm sad to see Seinfeld go too, but let's be honest, a total lack of self-awareness re: your own privilege is a huge part of being The Ultimate Whitey. Seinfeld's ability to understand its characters are actually sociopathic assholes is what ultimately disqualifies it from taking the crown.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

#teamfriends

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Seinfeld ended with the four main character being sent to jail for being self-absorbed sociopaths with no regard for anyone but themselves.

[Yeti]

I actually went to Youtube to watch this since embedding is disabled.

And  at the "Black people are the real racists!" trope being used here. Sex and The City is definitely deserving of the top spot in my mind now.

[Howard Alan Treesong]

"Tonight, on a Very Special Blossom... Blossom almost takes the crown, only to lose in the Final Four. How will she deal with this tragedy and heartbreak?"

[El Babua]

Watching an episode of Full House as I type.

John Stamos getting bailed out of jail and having his charges dropped just because it's his wedding, him and his fiance getting a free ride by an ironically all black chorus bus just because Lori Laughlin's on TV (and probably white). The black chorus is probably gonna perform to close this out, so I dunno. On one hand, that's probably more black people in one scene than Friends had ever had, on the other... 

[Kara]

John Stamos getting bailed out of jail and having his charges dropped just because it's his wedding

holy shit this is so white

[hampster]

Had to go with my gut and it told me full house was a solid #3 but not top two material. Submitted my vote

[Kara]

FINAL 4 RESULTS

Full House OVER Sex and the City

Blossom OVER Friends the upsets y'all the upsets

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Guy? Don't be so gender essentialist cis-scum. OVER
No seriously, fuck that guy. AND
Fuck that guy.

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CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH

Full House VERSUS Blossom

http://www.VoteFair.org/cgi-bin/votefairgenballot.cgi/votingid=26624-34146-04259

Voting ends 0000 9/28/14 because I have no life and will be home at midnight on a Saturday night.

[El Babua]

Whoa

[Positive Touch]

damn I woulda voted for sitc too. the second movie like if a red iPod came to life and wrote scripts in Hollywood. one of the most embarrassing things I ever seen, easily.

[Howard Alan Treesong]

they weren't there for me :'(

[Steve Contra]

[nudemacusers]

Ah thread bump, can't wait to see who friends is up against in the grand finals.



...




...

[pilonv1]

I endorse this final

[larrydavid]

amazing upset.

but remember everyone, there are no losers here, we've had nothing but #1 contenders ever since the elite eight. i've seen airtight cases for each of the final four on the last few pages. the bore should be proud. #whiteexcellence

[Momo]

Voted. Riding Blossom's ass to the end like nut on a hooker

[nudemacusers]

amazing upset.

but remember everyone, there are no losers here, we've had nothing but #1 contenders ever since the elite eight. i've seen airtight cases for each of the final four on the last few pages. the bore should be proud. #whiteexcellence

as a white person, I have been taught from an early age that the bold is what losers say

[larrydavid]

amazing upset.

but remember everyone, there are no losers here, we've had nothing but #1 contenders ever since the elite eight. i've seen airtight cases for each of the final four on the last few pages. the bore should be proud. #whiteexcellence

as a white person, I have been taught from an early age that the bold is what losers say

as a nonwhite person, i regret the use of lame platitudes and will now edit to say TANNERS BOUT TO TAKE THIS BITCHEZ, FRIENDS SUCKS SO HARD CAN'T EVEN WIN WHITEST SHOW

[Kara]

I have a special surprise in store wrt to the champion but I'm not sure if it will impact voting if I reveal it now or when I reveal the winner and I'd prefer the winner be determined by who can stuff the ballot box the better instead of who hates me more.

THE INDECISION IS CRIPPLING Y'ALL.

[hampster]

Blossom OVER Friends the upsets y'all the upsets

 

Well I put my vote on Blossom. I don't see how a show can knock out Friends and not win the whole thing

[nudemacusers]

amazing upset.

but remember everyone, there are no losers here, we've had nothing but #1 contenders ever since the elite eight. i've seen airtight cases for each of the final four on the last few pages. the bore should be proud. #whiteexcellence

as a white person, I have been taught from an early age that the bold is what losers say

as a nonwhite person, i regret the use of lame platitudes and will now edit to say TANNERS BOUT TO TAKE THIS BITCHEZ, FRIENDS SUCKS SO HARD CAN'T EVEN WIN WHITEST SHOW

[CatsCatsCats]

MHz! Such it friends haters :iMac


Holy shit this post brought to you by apple autocorrect

[Great Rumbler]

vs.

[Human Snorenado]

The salt when Blossom wins...

[lennedsay]

CACNESS VS BLACKNESS

Blossom

Cacness:
Whoa
Large percentage of minorities don't remember it
Hats
Joey Lawrence
Chick who played Blossom is now on the Big Bang Theory
Main chick is also a huge hippie in real life, complete with breastfeeding a school-age kid

Blackness:
Six's ass


Full House

Cacness:
Minimal minorities despite set in California
Bob Saget
Cut. It. Out.
Jingle composers
Middle child ended up a meth head in real life
Kimmy Gibler

Blackness:
Black people actually know what Full House is
House full of family, immediate and extended
John Stamos has more swag than any other white man in existence, comparable only to swag of a black man

[Himu]

"John Stamos has more swag than any other white man in existence, comparable only to swag of a black man"

David Bowie is fucking crying.

[Momo]

Blossom OVER Friends the upsets y'all the upsets

 

Well I put my vote on Blossom. I don't see how a show can knock out Friends and not win the whole thing

This isnt at all an upset. Most people are just chiming in Friends because a) they remember it and b)couldn't remember blossom clearly. The second you remember what Blossom was, you realize only Home Improvements comes close to being as cac.

[lennedsay]

I actually heard the phrase, "Hey do you watch Friends?" today. I thought I traveled back in time.

The guy was wearing sunglasses on the back of his head. It somehow made more sense when I noticed that.

[Human Snorenado]

if blossom won the vote, that means that more than 50% didn't sleep on it

you're not SO special wrath

...or it means I voted A LOT

[Momo]

if blossom won the vote, that means that more than 50% didn't sleep on it

you're not SO special wrath

...or it means I voted A LOT

Election rigging is some real cac behavior

[Kara]

I actually heard the phrase, "Hey do you watch Friends?" today. I thought I traveled back in time.

The guy was wearing sunglasses on the back of his head. It somehow made more sense when I noticed that.

Maybe 4 years ago I hung out on a lib arts college campus a lot (don't ask) and Friends was a huge word of mouth thing. College freshman and sophomores.

[Kara]

TONIGHT'S THE NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT

[CatsCatsCats]

You guys




Still shocked Growing Pains is out

[Kara]

Oh yeah, my surprise is that I'm going to watch each and every episode of whatever show wins and do a shitty LiveJournal thread documenting the horrors I find in my travels through realms of the unreal.

[Kara]

There is nothing you can do to me that I have not already done to myself.

[Shadow Mod]

Chucking my name in the ring for Blossom despite by absence for most of the competition. That hat alone could win.

[Beezy]

I've honestly never heard of this show Blossom until I started checking this thread.

[Yeti]

Blossom only had 114 episodes, Full House had 192. Just sayin'.

[pilonv1]

Has to be full house now

[Kara]

Blossom only had 114 episodes, Full House had 192. Just sayin'.

It's about quality, not quantity.

GETTING EXCITED Y'ALL

[Yeti]

If you're looking for quality, you may wind up very disappointed.

[pilonv1]

so every weekday morning while eating breakfast i watch mad about you because if i watch any more japanese morning variety tv i'm going to kill someone

the last three episodes guest-starred regis philbin, jerry lewis, and mistah sheffieeeeld from the nanny

this seemed like the right thread to mention that

My fiancee has been binge watching Frasier in the backgroud while doing wedding planning for the last month. I don't think I've seen a non-white person in the whole show yet. The closest might have been the female boss of the radio station in one of the early seasons who had a bit of a tan.

[Kara]

We did it y'all.



What a Cinderella run by Blossom.

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Now I do what I must do, not for honor, but for you (Snake Eater).

[El Babua]