Author Topic: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.  (Read 3814 times)

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Am_I_Anonymous

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New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« on: April 21, 2015, 10:00:13 AM »
I was out all day working and got home a bit late last night. Nobody was home except my college bound son. Walked in...made a hella good sandwich and decided it was time to take a shit.

So instead of using my normal bathroom I decided to use the downstairs one due to proximity/need to pass turds and walked over there. I opened the door not even looking ahead and bumped directly into my son sending "Sarah With Asz" a fucking D pic. And literally entered the picture at the exact time he was snapping it. You see my bald ass head and shoulder directly in frame right.

I looked at him....shook my head....laughed....and said "damn son you got your mom's side of the families packages you unfortunate bastard.....to which he replied "I'm a grow'er not a show'er"

I then exited the bathroom and sat down on the couch like :shaq2

My life brehs
YMMV

Madrun Badrun

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #1 on: April 21, 2015, 10:02:15 AM »
You should send "Sarah With Asz" your own dick pic for comparison.   

CatsCatsCats

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #2 on: April 21, 2015, 10:03:03 AM »
so he was sending flaccid dick pics? :lol

Am_I_Anonymous

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #3 on: April 21, 2015, 10:03:42 AM »
so he was sending flaccid dick pics? :lol

No but his struggle is real. Poor kids 14 year old brother got him beat.

He better get that NFL contract lol.
YMMV

Am_I_Anonymous

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #4 on: April 21, 2015, 10:07:15 AM »
Side note Sarah with ass is a CAC. He heading for a multiple divorce future.
YMMV

Rufus

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #5 on: April 21, 2015, 10:13:32 AM »
Man, getting bagged on by your dad for the size of your dick. Maybe fatherlessness isn't so bad after all. :tocry

Madrun Badrun

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #6 on: April 21, 2015, 10:23:33 AM »
Ya after seeing Am's posts I'm glad my father abandoned me.  I would not be able to cope with the shamings. 

Phoenix Dark

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #7 on: April 21, 2015, 10:47:08 AM »
How do you know the dick sizes of your wife's side of the family?
:hitler
010

Joe Molotov

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #8 on: April 21, 2015, 10:53:38 AM »
How do you know the dick sizes of your wife's side of the family?
:hitler

The traditional pre-marriage sword fight between the father-in-law and the groom.
©@©™

Am_I_Anonymous

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #9 on: April 21, 2015, 11:19:08 AM »
How do you know the dick sizes of your wife's side of the family?
:hitler

the implication is that ' that shit didn't come from me :jawalrus '

That you based Eschgawd not everybody asks their cousins for Cock pics PD.
YMMV

I'm a Puppy!

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #10 on: April 21, 2015, 12:27:45 PM »
Make threads about your kids dick sizes brehs
que

nudemacusers

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #11 on: April 21, 2015, 12:29:56 PM »
How do you know the dick sizes of your wife's side of the family?
:hitler

the implication is that ' that shit didn't come from me :jawalrus '

That you based Eschgawd not everybody asks their cousins for Cock pics PD.
maybe the world would be a better place if we did :flabbypd
﷽﷽﷽﷽﷽

Kara

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #12 on: April 21, 2015, 12:32:03 PM »
I would have made fun of him for his spelling instead.

Tasty

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #13 on: April 21, 2015, 12:32:42 PM »
I was out all day working and got home a bit late last night. Nobody was home except my college bound son. Walked in...made a hella good sandwich and decided it was time to take a shit.

So instead of using my normal bathroom I decided to use the downstairs one due to proximity/need to pass turds and walked over there. I opened the door not even looking ahead and bumped directly into my son sending "Sarah With Asz" a fucking D pic. And literally entered the picture at the exact time he was snapping it. You see my bald ass head and shoulder directly in frame right.

I looked at him....shook my head....laughed....and said "damn son you got your mom's side of the families packages you unfortunate bastard.....to which he replied "I'm a grow'er not a show'er"

I then exited the bathroom and sat down on the couch like :shaq2

My life brehs

Possibly the gayest story I've ever read, and I have Literotica bookmarked.

spoiler (click to show/hide)
What happened next? :phil
[close]

Am_I_Anonymous

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #14 on: April 21, 2015, 12:33:52 PM »
Make threads about your kids dick sizes brehs

Make no mistake it's still bigger than yours.
YMMV

I'm a Puppy!

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #15 on: April 21, 2015, 12:34:25 PM »
Make threads about my dick size brehs
que

Am_I_Anonymous

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #16 on: April 21, 2015, 12:43:21 PM »
" Asz? Is this why we're here? What do you think I bust my ass for? For you to send dick picks to a girl whose body parts you can't spell correctly? "



(Image removed from quote.)

You know funny enough the kid isn't a cusser. Never has been. Takes after his mother in that regard.
YMMV

Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #17 on: April 21, 2015, 12:43:31 PM »
Did he still send the dick pic after you photobombed him?

Kara

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #18 on: April 21, 2015, 12:44:16 PM »
" Asz? Is this why we're here? What do you think I bust my ass for? For you to send dick picks to a girl whose body parts you can't spell correctly? "



(Image removed from quote.)

A man can compensate for his dick size, but there's no cover for being an idiot.

Am_I_Anonymous

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #19 on: April 21, 2015, 12:44:47 PM »
" Asz? Is this why we're here? What do you think I bust my ass for? For you to send dick picks to a girl whose body parts you can't spell correctly? "



(Image removed from quote.)

A man can compensate for his dick size, but there's no cover for being an idiot.

Watch it there, bitch boy.
YMMV

Kara

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #20 on: April 21, 2015, 12:46:57 PM »
Whoops, sorry.  :-\

T234

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #21 on: April 21, 2015, 01:15:57 PM »
Make threads about your kids dick sizes brehs

This is The Bore, son.

THIS AIN'T THE ROLAND PARK LADIES' TEE

Make threads about my dick size brehs

This is The Bore, son.

WE AIN'T AFRAID OF A LITTLE SUGAR SCHWANZ

" Asz? Is this why we're here? What do you think I bust my ass for? For you to send dick picks to a girl whose body parts you can't spell correctly? "



(Image removed from quote.)

A man can compensate for his dick size, but there's no cover for being an idiot.

Watch it there, bitch boy.

This is The Bore, son.

WE AIN'T OUTCHEA BERATING DRUNKEN HEBREWS EXCEPT WILLCO WHO DESERVES IT

Whoops, sorry.  :-\


This is The Bore, son.

THIS AIN'T INTRAMURALS, BROTHER! 13-9, 13-9


« Last Edit: April 21, 2015, 01:49:17 PM by T234 »
UK

Kara

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #22 on: April 21, 2015, 03:51:14 PM »
If I ever get indicted by a federal grand jury for tax evasion I'm going to yell, "THIRTEEN-NINE, SON. THIRTEEN-NINE." as they drag me into the district courthouse. :jawalrus

brawndolicious

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #23 on: April 21, 2015, 07:28:06 PM »
Well it probably means that you give pretty rational responses to your kids shenanigans if they're this lax about hiding it. They're not so worried you'll cut their head off.

spoiler (click to show/hide)
Except figuratively in this case.
[close]

nachobro

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #24 on: April 21, 2015, 08:52:21 PM »
You know funny enough the kid isn't a cusser. Never has been. Takes after his mother in that regard.
That's really good. I was a big cusser for a long time and had to train myself to stop so I could actually get ahead in life.

Van Cruncheon

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #25 on: April 21, 2015, 11:38:02 PM »
came for the humblebrag; stayed for pd's inevitable arousal
duc

Madrun Badrun

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #26 on: April 21, 2015, 11:48:37 PM »
Like PD gets aroused for anything less than 8''

Phoenix Dark

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #27 on: April 21, 2015, 11:52:53 PM »
Like PD gets aroused for anything less than 8''

As Q-Tip would say, black is black.

:hitler
010

Kara

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Re: New humorous life story of AiA's offspring.
« Reply #28 on: April 21, 2015, 11:55:09 PM »
PD I was lubricating a long, black shaft today.

spoiler (click to show/hide)
It was a seatpost.
[close]