Author Topic: Subway's Jared Eats Fresh (Read 36172 times)

studyguy · « **Reply #180 on:** August 20, 2015, 11:51:22 AM »

That NYP front page

Kara · « **Reply #181 on:** August 20, 2015, 12:22:00 PM »

Nice to see the Post isn't above rape jokes.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #182 on:** August 20, 2015, 12:36:11 PM »

Ya as funny as it is to see it, I don't actually think its cool for a newspaper to make prison rape jokes.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #183 on:** August 20, 2015, 01:17:31 PM »

While I agree, I'm not sure I'd call the Post a newspaper. That's pretty generous.

Great Rumbler · « **Reply #184 on:** August 20, 2015, 04:21:40 PM »

The New York Post...or as the people of the South call it: toilet paper.

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #185 on:** August 20, 2015, 05:46:04 PM »

this is the same paper that had this front page

Yeti · « **Reply #186 on:** August 20, 2015, 06:34:50 PM »

I like how someone, rather rushing to help the man up, decided instead to whip out their phone and take a picture.

Steve Contra · « **Reply #187 on:** August 20, 2015, 06:56:22 PM »

That's not some bored millennial whipping out their phone for a photo like many people assumed initially, the dude was a professional photographer who freelanced for the Post and knew they would buy that photo for some serious cash.

Yeti · « **Reply #188 on:** August 20, 2015, 08:09:52 PM »

So it was more mercenary, even better.

Tasty · « **Reply #189 on:** August 31, 2015, 02:19:12 PM »

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #190 on:** August 31, 2015, 02:20:46 PM »

Ate subway today.

Great Rumbler · « **Reply #191 on:** August 31, 2015, 02:22:06 PM »

Quote from: TheInfelicitousDandy on August 31, 2015, 02:20:46 PM

Ate subway today.

I did, too. *high-five*

Although, I actually ate on the road, since I was in a hurry.

Tasty · « **Reply #192 on:** August 31, 2015, 02:22:46 PM »

HOLY SHIT I just realized

MGSV Spoilers:

spoiler (click to show/hide)

they actually spoiled the game's big twist.

[close]

Tasty · « **Reply #193 on:** August 31, 2015, 02:23:03 PM »

Quote from: TheInfelicitousDandy on August 31, 2015, 02:20:46 PM

Ate subway today.

chronovore · « **Reply #194 on:** September 05, 2015, 11:27:44 PM »

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #195 on:** September 05, 2015, 11:37:36 PM »

Quote from: Great Rumbler on August 31, 2015, 02:22:06 PM

Quote from: TheInfelicitousDandy on August 31, 2015, 02:20:46 PM
Ate subway today.

I did, too. *high-five*

Although, I actually ate on the road, since I was in a hurry.

I did again today too.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #196 on:** September 05, 2015, 11:46:42 PM »

Quote from: Tasty Meat on August 31, 2015, 02:22:46 PM

HOLY SHIT I just realized

MGSV Spoilers:
spoiler (click to show/hide)
they actually spoiled the game's big twist.
[close]

What is it? I don't play console games so fuck it.

Tasty · « **Reply #197 on:** September 06, 2015, 01:24:22 AM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on September 05, 2015, 11:46:42 PM

Quote from: Tasty Meat on August 31, 2015, 02:22:46 PM
HOLY SHIT I just realized

MGSV Spoilers:
spoiler (click to show/hide)
they actually spoiled the game's big twist.
[close]

What is it? I don't play console games so fuck it.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

The Big Boss you play as during MGSV ("Venom Snake") isn't the real Big Boss but the medic from Ground Zeroes (through a combo of plastic surgery and hypnosis.) So the Jared Fogle and Dog the Bounty Hunter in the Mega64 vid being the "real" ones trying to defend their reputations from the famous ones are a riff on that.

[close]

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #198 on:** September 06, 2015, 03:40:43 AM »

I ate Subway today.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #199 on:** September 06, 2015, 03:43:03 AM »

Quote from: Tasty Meat on September 06, 2015, 01:24:22 AM

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on September 05, 2015, 11:46:42 PM
Quote from: Tasty Meat on August 31, 2015, 02:22:46 PM
HOLY SHIT I just realized

MGSV Spoilers:
spoiler (click to show/hide)
they actually spoiled the game's big twist.
[close]

What is it? I don't play console games so fuck it.

spoiler (click to show/hide)
The Big Boss you play as during MGSV ("Venom Snake") isn't the real Big Boss but the medic from Ground Zeroes (through a combo of plastic surgery and hypnosis.) So the Jared Fogle and Dog the Bounty Hunter in the Mega64 vid being the "real" ones trying to defend their reputations from the famous ones are a riff on that.
[close]

Video games

Tasty · « **Reply #200 on:** September 09, 2015, 02:23:32 AM »

http://thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=overrated_sandwiches

Quote

It's hard to fault a Subway sandwich for being bad, because you're generally responsible for picking the toppings (when the lettuce-happy employees aren't two-fisting your sandwich's bread hole with all that iceberg).

For a company whose slogan is "Eat Fresh," it's pretty ballsy that not a single thing on the menu is actually fresh. Either that, or Subway's trying to change the definition of the phrase "eat fresh" to "fuck you."

In a place that prides itself on being fresh, you shouldn't find scoops of dry, breaded, pre-processed meats sitting in plastic bags, unless they're in the dumpster (which is where they belong). Even the vegetables aren't "fresh" because they're pre-cut and sitting in tubs for an hour or more. The avocado that you have to pay a premium for is usually a browned paste by the time it sullies your sandwich, and the chicken patties are microwaved when ordered. Because when I think "fresh," I think microwave.

And to top off this fresh meal, every Subway employee is trained to ask you if you want to add a bag of chips and a sugary fountain soda to your order. And it works. Keep eating fresh you morons.

Kara · « **Reply #201 on:** September 09, 2015, 02:44:46 AM »

They always ask me if I want mayo. #microaggressions

Tasty · « **Reply #202 on:** September 09, 2015, 10:14:07 AM »

Quote from: Kara on September 09, 2015, 02:44:46 AM

They always ask me if I want mayo. #microaggressions

And you always say yes, right?

Kara · « **Reply #203 on:** September 09, 2015, 12:35:50 PM »

O-only when I don't care about my nutrition and calories for the day.

Tasty · « **Reply #204 on:** September 09, 2015, 12:44:15 PM »

So every time then

sarslip · « **Reply #205 on:** September 09, 2015, 01:23:43 PM »

Subway: Mayo?

Me: Just a little.

Subway:

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #206 on:** September 09, 2015, 11:23:34 PM »

You are just too young to know what is right, slip.

spoiler (click to show/hide)

You should tell a parent or a gardener about what they are trying to put in you.

[close]

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Spell check wrote that joke for me.

[close]

Kara · « **Reply #207 on:** September 09, 2015, 11:46:28 PM »

Quote from: Tasty Meat on September 09, 2015, 12:44:15 PM

So every time then

CYBER BULLY

MODS HELP

Tasty · « **Reply #208 on:** September 09, 2015, 11:53:07 PM »

You haven't even seen my bully side yet.

VomKriege · « **Reply #209 on:** October 30, 2015, 08:25:52 PM »

VomKriege · « **Reply #210 on:** October 30, 2015, 08:53:34 PM »

Mad props to that woman tho. Couldn't imagine supporting such a scarring experience for years.
Total creep.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #211 on:** October 30, 2015, 09:02:29 PM »

Will watch tomorrow during my lunch. I'm having subway.

CatsCatsCats · « **Reply #212 on:** October 30, 2015, 09:05:36 PM »

Quote from: TheInfelicitousDandy on October 30, 2015, 09:02:29 PM

Will watch tomorrow during my lunch. I'm having subway.

Arvie if I ever run away to Canada, I hope it's me you capture in your basement

Kara · « **Reply #213 on:** October 30, 2015, 09:17:24 PM »

I could have done without knowing Jared whimpers like Mistress Quinn's gimp when he's aroused by raping children.

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #214 on:** October 30, 2015, 11:23:00 PM »

I saw that shit yesterday and thought about bumping this thread, but I forgot to after I was done throwing up.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #215 on:** October 31, 2015, 01:46:42 AM »

Quote from: TheInfelicitousDandy on October 30, 2015, 09:02:29 PM

Will watch tomorrow during my lunch. I'm having subway.

Gonna have all the sides on your sandwich, like Jared?

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #216 on:** October 31, 2015, 10:57:56 AM »

Depends on the sandwich.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #217 on:** November 19, 2015, 11:26:33 PM »

Had two 12 inch chicken teriyakis today to celebrate Jared's conviction. The second one was only $0.99 because I had a coupon.

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #218 on:** November 19, 2015, 11:55:54 PM »

Jared's getting 15 years in the federal sneezer.

Quote

On behalf of the defense, Dr. John Bradford testified he had diagnosed Fogle with hypersexuality, alcohol dependency and "mild pedophilia."

Rufus · « **Reply #219 on:** November 19, 2015, 11:59:52 PM »

So what comes up when you google "mild pedophilia"?

http://www.salon.com/2013/09/10/richard_dawkins_defends_mild_pedophilia_says_it_does_not_cause_lasting_harm/

Shadow Mod · « **Reply #220 on:** November 20, 2015, 12:01:56 AM »

Quote from: Rufus on November 19, 2015, 11:59:52 PM

So what comes up when you google "mild pedophilia"?

http://www.salon.com/2013/09/10/richard_dawkins_defends_mild_pedophilia_says_it_does_not_cause_lasting_harm/

Dawkins with the self-inflicted Ls for years now.

Mandark · « **Reply #221 on:** November 20, 2015, 12:53:53 AM »

Quote from: Rufus on November 19, 2015, 11:59:52 PM

So what comes up when you google "mild pedophilia"?

http://www.salon.com/2013/09/10/richard_dawkins_defends_mild_pedophilia_says_it_does_not_cause_lasting_harm/

This is the ultimate example of someone saying "We did it like that back when I was a child and I came out okay" when they are clearly a raging asshole.

VomKriege · « **Reply #222 on:** November 20, 2015, 05:48:17 AM »

Quote from: Joe Molotov on November 19, 2015, 11:55:54 PM

Jared's getting 15 years in the federal sneezer.

Quote
On behalf of the defense, Dr. John Bradford testified he had diagnosed Fogle with hypersexuality, alcohol dependency and "mild pedophilia."

That's not the most ridiculous quote from the defense.

“Once he lost weight, it seemed as though in a short time he had hyper-sexuality,” Bradford said. “There are brain disorders that can be associated with sexual drive.”

“He was mostly attracted to females who were teenagers, who were 14 to 17 years of age. His attraction was at the high end of that range.”

“There’s no evidence I know that he molested a child... 16- or 17-year-olds are not pre-pubertal children.”

We heard the dude taped on national television jacking off to the idea of fleeing to Thailand with children to molest them

Boogie · « **Reply #223 on:** November 20, 2015, 06:43:40 AM »

Quote from: Joe Molotov on November 19, 2015, 11:55:54 PM

Jared's getting 15 years in the federal sneezer.

Quote
On behalf of the defense, Dr. John Bradford testified he had diagnosed Fogle with hypersexuality, alcohol dependency and "mild pedophilia."

Prosecution asks for 12 and a half years.....Judge gives him 15.

That shit don't happen in Canada, brehs.

I'm a Puppy! · « **Reply #224 on:** November 20, 2015, 01:03:26 PM »

15 years. Man, nothing this guy does is over 16.

Brehvolution · « **Reply #225 on:** November 20, 2015, 01:23:03 PM »

Quote from: I'm a Puppy! on November 20, 2015, 01:03:26 PM

15 years. Man, nothing this guy does is over 16.

Kara · « **Reply #226 on:** November 20, 2015, 01:26:52 PM »

I know that the defense is supposed to zealously advocate for their client, but when your defense at sentencing amounts to, "my client isn't a pedophile, my client is an ephebophile

," I start to see the merits of inquisitorial over adversarial legal systems.

I'm a Puppy! · « **Reply #227 on:** November 20, 2015, 01:32:26 PM »

Quote from: Kara on November 20, 2015, 01:26:52 PM

I know that the defense is supposed to zealously advocate for their client, but when your defense at sentencing amounts to, "my client isn't a pedophile, my client is an ephebophile ," I start to see the merits of inquisitorial over adversarial legal systems.

It would carry weight if gafers were on the jury

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #228 on:** November 20, 2015, 02:12:16 PM »

Now that would truly be a jury of his peers.

Shadow Mod · « **Reply #229 on:** November 20, 2015, 03:00:46 PM »

Shouldn't have blamed Subway, should have blamed the Vita and anime.

seagrams hotsauce · « **Reply #230 on:** November 21, 2015, 12:34:23 AM »

thisismyusername · « **Reply #231 on:** November 21, 2015, 01:34:11 AM »

Quote from: I'm a Puppy! on November 20, 2015, 01:03:26 PM

15 years. Man, nothing this guy does is over 16.

Quote from: seagrams hotsauce on November 21, 2015, 12:34:23 AM

(Image removed from quote.)

Holy shit, I just realized his Subway spokesmen gig was going on 16 years. This is completely accurate, nothing he does is over 16.

Human Snorenado · « **Reply #232 on:** March 16, 2016, 11:32:31 AM »

Things aren't going so well for Jared in the clink...

http://www.celebuzz.com/2016-03-16/jared-fogle-prison-ambush-beaten/

Joe Molotov · « **Reply #233 on:** March 16, 2016, 02:05:19 PM »

I read a couple of weeks ago that he'd gotten fat again from stress eating and that he was being regularly bullied by other inmates.

chronovore · « **Reply #234 on:** March 16, 2016, 11:21:04 PM »

Hard to feel bad about a child predator getting a little facial work done.

Madrun Badrun · « **Reply #235 on:** March 16, 2016, 11:31:36 PM »

Ya, still hate prison violence and feel articles like this don't help the issue.

Imagine its a young kid in for a minor drug charge and now he has a prison fight on his record and fearing for his safety, which will probably just lead to more poor choices instead of rehabilitation.

Cerveza mas fina · « **Reply #236 on:** March 17, 2016, 08:01:44 AM »

Quote from: TheInfelicitousDandy on March 16, 2016, 11:31:36 PM

Ya, still hate prison violence and feel articles like this don't help the issue.

Imagine its a young kid in for a minor drug charge and now he has a prison fight on his record and fearing for his safety, which will probably just lead to more poor choices instead of rehabilitation.

Don't do the crime, if you can't do the time

brawndolicious · « **Reply #237 on:** March 17, 2016, 10:46:02 AM »

Quote from: Premium Lager on March 17, 2016, 08:01:44 AM

Quote from: TheInfelicitousDandy on March 16, 2016, 11:31:36 PM
Ya, still hate prison violence and feel articles like this don't help the issue.

Imagine its a young kid in for a minor drug charge and now he has a prison fight on his record and fearing for his safety, which will probably just lead to more poor choices instead of rehabilitation.

Don't do the crime, if you can't do the time

While a celebrity pedophile would have the worst prison experience possible, it's actually a good thing because it shows even in high profile cases that prisons can't keep inmates safe from each other. It just creates a bad cycle if people keep coming out of prison worse than they went in.

News:

Author Topic: Subway's Jared Eats Fresh (Read 36172 times)