There was a time...in High School...when this fat ugly bitch molested me at band practice.
Beatrice was hot.
And yeah, Aoi's is pretty fucking disturbing. He just let his cousin keep sucking him off. I mean, the dude is 15 and is old enough to understand how fucked up that is. WTF?
i can't explain it. Physically, it felt really, really good. i felt wrong for having those feelings, especially as i was trying to go to sleep that night/morning. It kinda reminds me of the woman i talked about on GAF who was abused sexually by her dad. It was the same with her, she knew it was wrong and she felt guilty for enjoying it but she did.
In any case, all that happened and it's in the past now. i hadn't even thought of that shit for a few years until i saw a clip of Peep Show and it reminded me of it. i was starting to feel a Maker's Mark buzz last night when i started writing that, and i had to do shots just to sleep. It's fucked up, and the more i think about it the more i try to keep it down inside me. i'm drinking now hoping to numb the pain and keep the memories from coming back, and all i want to do is cry. :'(