Random talk thread: It just keeps happening

[Stro]

What's wrong wit da screen, tho

[team filler]

fuck da mods on dabore.com

[Ghoul]

fuck da mods on dabore.com

You wish breh. Gotta stay solo, stay safe.

[nachobro]

today's dumb tickets are just people that shut down their work pc on friday and now can't use remote desktop thank god for wake on lan

[bork]

today's dumb tickets are just people that shut down their work pc on friday and now can't use remote desktop thank god for wake on lan

We pushed out an update that removed the shutdown option entirely for people using Citrix 

[bork]

Just had someone ask why they can't use a camera for a video meeting and where the web camera on their (home) desktop is.  Had to explain that they would need to have purchased a camera or monitor with a camera because it's not built-in.  Good lord.

[Ghoul]

I'm at the point when I'm snitching on anyone being dumb.

Just had someone ask why they can't use a camera for a video meeting and where the web camera on their (home) desktop is.  Had to explain that they would need to have purchased a camera or monitor with a camera because it's not built-in.  Good lord.

I've had people ask me why they can't use audio over logmein.

[Joe Molotov]

Just had someone ask why they can't use a camera for a video meeting and where the web camera on their (home) desktop is.  Had to explain that they would need to have purchased a camera or monitor with a camera because it's not built-in.  Good lord.

My boss just asked me to get him a webcam today. I'm like "Okay, you need any toilet paper too while I getting things that don't exist anymore?"

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I didn't say that. 

[close]

[bork]

today's dumb tickets are just people that shut down their work pc on friday and now can't use remote desktop thank god for wake on lan

We pushed out an update that removed the shutdown option entirely for people using Citrix 

Also reminds me that while this has stopped people from turning off their PCs, it has not stopped people from either just logging out or restarting their home PCs when we ask them specifically to restart their office PCs.


Thankfully we can just do that remotely if they still don't get it.
 

9 times out of 10, the response to this is always:

"I can restart my office PC over Citrix?"
\
 

[Ghoul]

[Ghoul]

Worked this weekend and doing overtime today.

Taking a 20% pay cut in a couple weeks sugar coated as "you only have to work 80% of the time"

[team filler]

remember back when someone post pic of hot girl and not sure if ok to jerk teh cock or comment because might be tran 


these modern times we can stroke first with no worries and if she has a D the only concern is how big 

[Coax]

Just noticed Glen's account was deleted along with all their posts. I must have missed something.

[shosta]

she's in a better place

[Coax]

An eternity listening to Hilary Clinton speeches?

 

[chronovore]

He plays Pokemon Go with me. I got a gift from him in the game today 

How do I not have EchoRin in my friends list in P:Go?! PM me your number if you want an add from Japan.

[chronovore]

Just noticed Glen's account was deleted along with all their posts. I must have missed something.

First bit of good news in ages.

[bork]

Screen Expert: I have two monitors but I can only work remotely on the one.
Me: How are you working remotely?  Citrix?
Screen Expert: Yes.
Me: OK, you need to stretch the Citrix window across both screens.
Screen Expert: What?
Me: Click on the Citrix toolbar and then on the option to put Citrix in a window.
Screen Expert: OK, done.
Me: Now grab the edge of the window and drag it across to the other screen.
Screen Expert: Now it's not on the other screen!
Me: 
Me: You need to just grab and drag it across both screens and can then maximize the window.
Screen Expert: Oh, OK.  But now it's just like one screen.  I want to to work like two monitors!
Me: You can't do that in Citrix, but-
Screen Expert: I WAS JUST DOING THAT LAST WEEK!
Me: -BUT you can now resize and move your application windows around so it's like you're using both screens for different programs.

Can't tell you how many times I have had this call over the past few weeks.

[thisismyusername]

Caller: I can't paste my snipping tool captures!
Caller: Why doesn't this work (rambles on for a few minutes)
Me: ...IS this in an email?
Caller: Yes.
Me: OK, can you try this?  Click on the Format Text tab in the email and check the format.  If it's plain text, change it to HTML-- Caller: HOTMAIL! 
Me: 
Me: Yes, HTML-
Caller: WHY DOESN'T [NAME] ALWAYS SEND HIS EMAILS IN *HOTMAIL*!?  HAHA! 

How the hell are you pronouncing "HTML" anywhere near "Hotmail?" "Ech(pause)-Tee(pause)-Emm(pause)-Ell(pause)"

Just noticed Glen's account was deleted along with all their posts. I must have missed something.

First bit of good news in ages.

[Stro]

Until recently, I never realized how much the phrase "tuna fish" annoys the shit out of me. You don't have to say "fish". Everyone knows tuna is a fish. Just say tuna.

[Nintex]

Citrix looks like corporate software from hell 

[Great Rumbler]

Until recently, I never realized how much the phrase "tuna fish" annoys the shit out of me. You don't have to say "fish". Everyone knows tuna is a fish. Just say tuna.

You can tune a piano but you can't tuna fish.

[team filler]

Until recently, I never realized how much the phrase "tuna fish" annoys the shit out of me. You don't have to say "fish". Everyone knows tuna is a fish. Just say tuna.

human mammals

[bork]

Caller: I can't log onto the VPN.  My password isn't working!
Me: You need to enter a token code for access.  Do you have a token?
Caller: Yes, but my password has always worked!
Me: For VPN, a token is required.
Caller: BUT IT ALWAYS TOOK MY PASSWORD!!!!! 
Me: I'm not sure what happened ( ), but a token has always been needed for this.
Caller: NO MY PASSWORD WORKS.
Me: Can you please try a token code?
Caller: ...Well, that worked.  I'm in!!    But why did that happen?  My password worked just yesterday!

--------

Me: Hi, [Name], how are you doing today?
Comedian: I'm doing all right- no coronavirus. 
Me: That's good, y--
Comedian: You might want to get yourself checked out though.
Me:

Awkward silence

Comedian: ...I apologize for my bad joke.  You're OK?

The call remained awkward following this.  I didn't care and told him I wasn't bothered by it at all, but I got the feeling he was red-faced for the remainder of the call, which unfortunately for him went like 20 minutes. 

[Joe Molotov]

You should have told him your mom just died of the corona and you're waiting for your test results.

[bork]

Maybe she just needed some more coffee:

Caller: I made some edits to this spreadsheet -your co-worker helped me with that 10 seconds ago- and blah blah blah blah how do I blah blah blah?

Me: Let me connect and take a look.

Caller: It says "read-only."  How do I stop that so I can send it back to someone?

Me: OK, so this was opened as an attachment?  You just need to save the document and then you can send it back.

Caller: No, I don't want to do that.  It might change something!  How can I send it as-is?

Me:

Me: You just made edits to it, so it has already been changed- you want to send your edits back, correct?

Caller: Yes, but without changes.

Me: 

Me: [Ignoring this] OK, I just saved it to your desktop.  It's no longer read-only and you can reply to the email and attach it.

Caller: How do I do that?

Me:

Outlook was open on her other screen.  I clicked Reply and attached the document.

Caller: Oh, OK!  So now I can type something in the message and send it?

[nachobro]

 

[shosta]

Me: You just made edits to it, so it has already been changed- you want to send your edits back, correct?

Caller: Yes, but without changes.

Me: 

[bork]

Just got another call asking the same thing about a spreadsheet that they opened up as read-only.

Caller: Hi, I am working on this Excel-thing and set up my lines but how do I save them?

Me: Let me take a look.

Caller: Yeah, it's probably better if you take a look at this!

Me: OK, I'm on with you now.

Caller: So I'm adding information on this line, but it doesn't seem to be saving anywh--

Me:...It's open as read-only.  Did you open this from an email?

Caller: Yes, and--

Me: You just need to SAVE it either to the DMS or locally.

Caller: Oh.  How do I do that?

Me:

Me: Just click on File and save it to the DMS or locally-

Caller: Ooh!  I want to save it to the Desktop!!

Me: OK, done. 

Caller: So it's saved now?

Me: Yes.

Caller: And then I just add a word and go to File -> Save each time, right?

Me: Uh...you can do that.  Or you can just click the save icon whenever you want to save.

Caller: And I won't lose anything?

Me: The document is saved to your desktop, so you're good.  Just keep in mind that if something were to happen to the file on your desktop or if you aren't able to access this desktop remotely, you could lose the file or lose access to it.  We recommend saving it to the DMS for this reason.

Caller: Oh, well how do I do that?

Me: 

Me: Click on File and select the option to save it to the DMS.

Caller: Oh, I see what you mean.  That's OK, I'll be all right, right?  Because it's on the desktop.

Me:

---

She decided to leave it on the Desktop after a second explanation and the call ended as I saw her type a single word, then go to File -> Save after doing so. 

[bork]

Looks like this is going to be a stupid call trilogy today.

Caller: Hiii, I ask chu guys toooo delete a document for me yesterday, but it is still there and I don' understand why.  You guys said to call because it is de wrong server or someting.

Me: Let me check the ticket. 

The ticket, which for a simple document deletion request is pretty long, is filled with back-and-forth email exchanges between the caller and my co-worker, who marked the document she requested for deletion, but then she would reply that it was still there, and he would respond that she was going back into the document and UNDELETING it, followed by her saying this was incorrect.  I checked the document history and sure enough, he deleted and she took it back and changed it so it wouldn't delete. 


Me: OK, so I just-

Caller: See?  Why did he put it back like that?!

Me: -The history shows that he marked it for deletion, but you adjusted the profile.

Caller: NO I DEEDN'T!!

Me: 

Me: I see he also asked you to call to see if you were on the wrong server.  Let me remote on and take a look.  Nope, that's the right one.  Is that the document listed you want to delete?

Caller: Yes, that one.  It won' let me dooo it.

Me:...That's a different document number than the one you emailed about yesterday.

Caller: NO EET ISN'T!  I EMAIL CHU GUYS THEES ONE!!

Me: ...Your email to us says to delete document ########22.  The one you have selected is ########11.

Caller: NO I SAID THEES ONE HERE AND BLAH BLAH BLAH DOCOOMENT BLAH BLAH BLAH DELEEEET BLAH BLAH BLAH

Me: 

Me: ....

Ignored the ranting and marked ########11 for deletion, then refreshed her DMS window and the document disappeared.

Caller: Oh, it's gone!  Great, THANK YOU!! 

Me:

[team filler]

hey bork, how do I edit post without changing anything

[bork]

And just when I thought I was done, one last call to cement this being Stupid Call Day:

Caller: I brought my desktop home from the office and it won't connect to the VPN! 
Me: Did you connect it to your home network first?
Caller: ...I have to do that??  I thought it would just connect. 
Me: No.
Caller: How do I do that?
Me:
Me: Do you see a little network icon on the lower-right, on the taskbar?  Click on that and select your network.
Caller: It says I need a key?  Oh I know I'll have to go find it-
Me: -Once you get connected, just connect to the VPN and you'll be good to go.

AND I AM DONE FOR THE DAY.

[team filler]

I want to edit, change nothing, but also not show that I edited 

[bork]

I want to edit, change nothing, but also not show that I edited 

yes

[Cauliflower Of Love]

bork i can't log into my eggman alt account

how do i recover password

[nachobro]

i had someone in the office send an email that just said "there is a toner issue with the printer"

so i call them up and ask what the issue was - "oh i don't remember" "can you go look at the screen and tell me what it says?" *huge sigh* "ok i'll call you back"

10 minutes later (its a 5ft trip for this person to the printer) i get a call back "so i'm looking at the screen and it says uh...toner something" so i just say "thanks" cause i realize this is not going to be productive and figure i'll just have to go into the office.

then i remember i can just look up on the printer's webpage to see the error

error says:  LOAD PAPER IN TRAY 1

so i just call someone else i know is there and they fill it up

[bork]

Caller: I can't access my computer with the Citrix.  Can you look at it?
Me: You have a Mac, right?  I can't look at that unfortunately.
Caller: WHAT?!
Me: We can't remote-assist Macs.
Caller: BUT YOU WERE JUST ON WITH ME YESTERDAY.
Me: That was your office computer, not your Mac.
Caller: NO YOU WERE HELPING ME YESTERDAY, REMEMBER!?
Me: Yes, but that was your OFFICE PC. 
Caller: OTHER PEOPLE HELPED ME TOO!
Me: That was your computer ON CITRIX.  NOT your HOME computer- We CANNOT connect to Macs.
Caller: I don't understand.  So you can't see my screen!?
Me: No. 
Caller: So you can't remote in and look at it with me?
Me: No.
Caller: Should I try another computer?
Me: Is one of them a Windows PC?
Caller: No, they're all Macs.



Thankfully, we did end up getting it to work for her.
 

[bork]

Caller: I'd like to use two programs on my screens.
Me: Sure, let me hop on and let's take a look at your settings.
Me: Do you have your second monitor connected?  Only one is displayed.
Caller: I only have one monitor.
Me:   
Caller: Isn't there a way to show two programs on the same screen?
Me: Yes, you can use the Windows "snap" feature to put two application windows side-by-side.  All you have to do is--
Caller: I googled that before I asked you to call me.  I'm not sure I understand it though.
Me: You can just move one application all the way over, like this, or use key combinations to snap it.  Now both are the same size.
Caller: Well, the thing is, I want to have both programs open so I can look at information on one and enter it into Excel here on the other.
Me: Right- we just 'snapped' both and they're open on both halves of your screen.
Caller: Is that all I can do?
Me: With one monitor?  Yes.
Caller: Just to make sure you understand what I want to do- I want to look at data in this PDF and enter into this spreadsheet.
Me: Right.  Both of those documents are open next to each other.
Caller: ........
Me:
Caller: Can I use my laptop with it as another screen?
Me: No, that won't work.
Caller: So what can I do?
Me: Use the snap feature.
Caller: But what else can I do?
Me: I can request a second monitor for you.
Caller: No, I don't want to do that.

[Joe Molotov]

Listen here, MAC. How do I use Citrix?

[CatsCatsCats]

Bar rescue is so boring to watch now, since we all know the real ending

[Cauliflower Of Love]

I think this is obvious, but I'm just re watching this is america from donald glover.


I can't imagine a scenario where he wasn't asked to fuck some execs wife and was like "fuck you" same as jordan peele, and chappelle, and all these people who have been seemingly ostracized.

[Nintex]

Louis CK just dropped a new special

[Madrun Badrun]

In the trash?

[Transhuman]

I'll try to watch it but I ain't paying $8 i'll tell you that

[team filler]

I'll pay $8 but I ain't watching I'll tell you that

[Transhuman]

I didn't find him that impressive before the masturbation thing and I want to see if it's improved his skill.

[team filler]

if he was funny, he could have got away with a lot more than jerking off in front of women. cosby was funny af and raped for decades with no problems. then he got old and grouchy, so they couldn't put up with it anymore 

[Transhuman]

I take it back, not watching this shit.

[Don Rumata]

I post memes on TheBore.com, let me tell you what's funny, boys. 

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I also ain't paying tho, but just because i'm not in the money-spendin' mood.

[close]

[team filler]

meme's>>>>>>>>>>>>>>comedians 

[Don Rumata]

meme's>>>>>>>>>>>>>>comedians 

Created or reposted?
I guess memes are like pizza, better the day after.

[Transhuman]

[Cindi Mayweather]

Written a list of things to talk to therapist about like how 2016 and the guilt over being racist towards white people led me to believe I had been sinful and therefore needed to be atone by joining a church and my mental spiral in the process. It's quite a trip.

2016 - trump wins, people are like "maybe we should start communicating with trump voters and conservatives" so I feel about it and end up doing so, and it leads to heartache.

[Transhuman]

On behalf of all white people, I forgive you.

But now we're even, k?

[team filler]

you can't just like everyone's posts all the time 

like printer go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrr 

[Pennywise]

https://twitter.com/NoContextRIP/status/1246570085805932544

That was supposed to go into the random pictures topic 

[team filler]

it did go in the random pictures thread, mate 

[Pennywise]

it did go in the random pictures thread, mate 

The quarantine is killing me.

Only saw it after I posted it and noticed that the Mister already posted it.

Well, since I'm already on it.
Enjoy it.
https://twitter.com/NoContextRIP/status/1246341771875016705

[team filler]

patrice oneal and richard pryor dead n e ways, so why should I care about stand-up comedy 

[Cindi Mayweather]

How do I become more positive? I used to be a very positive person. Now I'm crabby, anal, and overly negative. Any suggestions with this?