The Official Psychoanalysis GAF Thread

[lennedsay]

Oh GAF... http://secondapps.com/neogaf/showthread.php?t=433252

You can immediately tell when posters are sexually frustrated manbabies, mentally unstable fucktards, or potentially normal individuals with at least semi-normal sex lives.

[Cindi Mayweather]

wtf is this secondapps shit and lmao @ that thread

[lennedsay]

Sorry on my phone.

[Cindi Mayweather]

No, I'm asking cuz I've been seeing it so much lately and I'm wondering what it is.

[lennedsay]

Oh I've been using it since I got a smartphone. It formats GAF for mobile viewing/posting.

[Cindi Mayweather]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=28460609&postcount=147

best post in thread

[lennedsay]

  oh man

A summary of the thread from an insightful poster:

thread is so perfect.

started out as a semi-innocent question about nice guys, probably because OP considered himself a nice guy, but as soon as he got pressed a little, he lost his shit and turned into a venomous douche, possible woman hater. This sums up the nice guy problem pretty well.

[Joe Molotov]

Or maybe you're just intellectually worthless.

lol, didn't take long for that thread to take a turn for the awesome.

[Cindi Mayweather]

The only thing that thread has done for me is make me want to get my ass together. Tomorrow I'm going downtown AGAIN for a job. I WILL get a job. And I WILL get pussy and dick this weekend, goddamit.

I used to be a "nice guy" in grades 7-10. I'd give a girl I had a crush on roses. I'd tell the whole school I liked Mahagoney. Guess what! Mahagoney liked me too but decided to ditch me because I told everyone like a school boy that I wanted to jump her bones. Rejection! Give a random ass girl some roses? Teen years -- what was I thinking?! I'd go to my livejournal and wonder "WHY DO GIRLS HATE NICE GUYS???" when the answer was staring me in the face.

Rejection sucks, but guess what, that's life! Rejection teaches (or SHOULD) you your faults and you should have the common sense to know how to fix them. Kissing ass doesn't help, that crazy ass girlfriend I had a few months back was an ass kisser. I HATE ass kissers. Fuck that, I'm in your face on the internet, I'm in your face in real life. FUCK holding your opinions down and being a door mat, pining for some girl who isn't giving you the light of day. Well guess what? Fuck her too! She's just a woman, and I don't mean that in the derogatory sense, but in the human sense. She's only human. There are billions of humans. You can do better, and usually you do.

I've had a shit ton more success with women just being me and learning to smile and make them laugh than I ever did buying them some roses. I've surprisingly had a lot of admirers over the years, but they never approached because I didn't smile, I looked sad or whatever.

Like anything in life, experience breeds confidence and rejection breeds ways to get around that rejection. These dudes complaining should be like me, and just go to the mall or something, and just ask a bunch of random chicks out and be as funny as possible. Compliments are nice, but there's a line between sucking up and throwing away a compliment.

My problem? INTERNET ADDICTION. FUCK the internet. And this is why I hate being jobless, because then the only thing to do is to be around the house. Goddamn, I need a job asap so I can move downtown. I hate the suburb living. Suburban living is not good on one's ego! If only there was a good way to get rid of internet addiction...but it's impossible as everything is tied to the internet these days.

[Cindi Mayweather]

The 'nice guys' in that thread should watch the best movie ever, Ferris Bueller's Day Off.

It summarizes this subject -- and life in general -- perfectly. Every single life lesson is in that movie. EVERY SINGLE ONE.

BE A FERRIS:



NOT A CAMERON:



BE A FERRIS:



NOT A CAMERON:



The goal of life is to be Ferris. Not Cameron. Watch that movie a hundred  times. Hell, it's what I watch when I need encouragement. It might as well be titled "Ferris Bueller's Bible to Life".

[Phoenix Dark]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=433252&page=7

[fistfulofmetal]

all this talk about nice guys who have resentment towards women


what about assholes who have deep seeded resentment towards women, huh? where's my advice???

[Reb]

Have sex with men.

[brob]

one particular problem with these dudes, that I personally find rather funny, is that they often are the male equivalent of a fat chick who considers twilight her primary hobby, yet they have 8/10 standards.

[Barry Egan]

It's awesome being 6"2 and having a huge schlong and never ever having to worry about this nice guy/cool guy crap. Huahuahuahuahuahuahuahua.

[Maximus]

all this talk about nice guys who have resentment towards women


what about assholes who have deep seeded resentment towards women, huh? where's my advice???

You're awesome, you don't need any advice.

[Brehvolution]

It's awesome being 6"2 and having a huge schlong and never ever having to worry about this nice guy/cool guy crap. Huahuahuahuahuahuahuahua.

[Mupepe]

I'm 6'1 with an average dick (at best).  Do I get a brofist? 

[Cindi Mayweather]

5"6, average length, thick in width

[CajoleJuice]

5'7"

5.7

[Mupepe]

5ft 6 :/

My cock is about 5 inches in diameter - alas it's about 0.4 inches long

I use it as a somewhat fleshy portable plate for snacking off. Sometimes if i lie on my back on our roof top balcony and someone runs a cable from my arse to our TV, i can some times pick up satellite TV.

[Shaka Khan]

It's awesome being 6"2 and having a huge schlong and never ever having to worry about this nice guy/cool guy crap. Huahuahuahuahuahuahuahua.

For reals? Fully body shot and cock please. Will reciprocate.

[Chinner]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=28469951&postcount=448

There's a flip-side to this, of course. Sometimes you've got girls (and male friends) who really ARE attracted to jerks, like moths to a flame.

Imagine if:

1. A guy talks frequently about needing to get some "vajing."

2. He parks illegally, just 'cause he feels like it.

3. You tell him, in confidence, that a friend committed suicide / fell from a hotel roof under the influence of peyote, and he responds with, "Your friend was a fucking idiot."

4. He lies to employers about his credentials and has friends provide false references in order to land a contract for Microsoft.

5. He bitches and moans about the price of gas and drives a 1988 Ford Bronco.

6. He says phrases like, "I get more pussy than panties."

7. He categorizes many of his male friends as "closers" (those who can seal the deal with women) and "non-closers."

8. While drunk, he intentionally falls back on a $1500 antique bed at a friend's party. He weighs over 230 pounds.

9. He makes repeated claims of "So-and-so is an asshole, never talking to him again." then proceeds to hang out with aforementioned assholes (e.g. meth dealer) weeks later.

10. He has no sense of cleanliness. He has his sister's live-in maid do all of his laundry.

11. He tells sophisticated 'anecdotes' from his time spent travelling, like "The reason India is an unclean country is because Ghandi told the native population to fuck with the British and make them unwelcome."

12. Brags about fucking a female acquaintance in the ass.

...and yet, most of the people in your social circle ABSOLUTELY LOVE HIM, especially women.

[AdmiralViscen]

What I learned today from 30 seconds at GAF:

PSV will fail because it is nothing but PS3 ports
Wii U will be the best because it can finally get PS3 ports

[Phoenix Dark]

6'2
7in cut

[Robo]

5'10 with a 7 inch dick, lets swordfight!

   we twins.  En garde!

[Phoenix Dark]

On a side note I've been wearing boxers for about 5 months and my junk is still crooked. Kinda bummed, but then again if I had a pussy I'd rather take a dick that scraped the walls than simply went in and out

[etiolate]

Like I've said before, the nice guy thing is produced by both sides. The public indoctrination for girls is "nice guys" and this is what you'll hear a young naive teen female talk about wanting--why won't a guy do X like in Y movie, and that then trains the males to believe in these ideals.

Of course, this behavior isn't what is rewarded, so the "nice guy" becomes resentful. My normal advice for guys is to ignore teen girls and find yourself out, figure yourself out and be it.

[CajoleJuice]

Like I've said before, the nice guy thing is produced by both sides. The public indoctrination for girls is "nice guys" and this is what you'll hear a young naive teen female talk about wanting--why won't a guy do X like in Y movie, and that then trains the males to believe in these ideals.

Of course, this behavior isn't what is rewarded, so the "nice guy" becomes resentful. My normal advice for guys is to ignore teen girls and find yourself out, figure yourself out and be it.

what does this have to do with PD's BBC?

[Shaka Khan]

what does this have to do with PD's BBC?

You mean ABC, right? because those numbers are unimpressive.

[CajoleJuice]

[Cindi Mayweather]

Yep. BBC is overstated shlock from black men who want to feel like they have SOME leg up on white people. Nicca you ain't packin'.

[Robo]

I'm cut so it can't be me.

[Mupepe]

You can't win, Robo.  Your dick is mutilated.  Weirdo.

[Cindi Mayweather]

Yazeed is from a muslim family. Of course he's cut, dudes.

[Joe Molotov]

5'10 with a 7 inch dick, lets swordfight!

   we twins.  En garde!

But who's the evil one who eventually loses the battle of cock!?

In the battle of cock, there are no losers.

[tiesto]

5'10", 7', extra girth

I've had quite a few girls tell me it was the thickest they've ever seen (not shitting you either).

But back to the "nice guy" discussion, I saw Lambtron post a link to a Feminist blog that had this:

    For the two hundredth time, when we’re talking about “nice guys,” we’re not talking about guys who are actually nice but suffer from shyness. That’s why the scare quotes. Try Nice Guys™ instead, if you prefer.

    A shy, but decent and caring man is quite likely to complain that he doesn’t get as much attention from women as he’d like. A Nice Guy™ will complain that women don’t pay him the attention he deserves. The essence of the distinction is that the Nice Guy™ feels women are obligated to him, and the Nice Guy™ doesn’t actually respect or even like women. The clearest indication of which of the two you’re dealing with is whether the person is interested in the possibility that he’s doing something wrong. A Nice Guy™ will insist that he’s doing everything perfectly right, and that women won’t subordinate themselves to him properly because he’s “Too Nice™,” meaning that he believes women deserve cruel treatment and he would like to be the one executing the cruelty.

I think I fit the whole "shy, but decent and caring man" paradigm myself. Been taking a leadership course to overcome shyness, and it's really helped me... not to mention I feel like a million bucks since I'm about to purchase my first house... so if/whenever I'm single again, watch out ladies 

[brob]

discussing "what women want" is such an incredibly futile exercise I don't even know what to say. Women are individuals just like dudebros and neckbeards. some of them are dumb as bricks, some assholes, some don't know what they want until they faceplant into it, etc. Just hang with people you wanna hang with and leave the rest for over-analyzing sociopaths.

[Olivia Wilde Homo]

I think talking about what women want on GAF is futile for two reasons:

1) People like to bring up hypotheticals like a motherfucker
2) People on GAF don't want to better themselves, they want to bitch and vent about their stupid and shitty lives

The thing about GAF is that these people aren't going to be captains of industry or hell, even a middle management schlub; no, these are the clowns that work the night shift at Gamestop well into their 30s or work as a data entry monkey throughout their career.  Hey, nothing wrong with that, but GAF people are narcissistic and delusional.  Therefore, these people think of themselves as uberfuckstuds or some superautisticaspergersgenius that can see through the bullshit.  Every once in a while, reality smacks them hard in the face (more like brutally beaten) and women is a big part of that hard smack.  So these guys react either by being pathetic white knights or misogynistic trolls.  It's why people lost their shit over Koshiba and thought Himumulu had a meltdown when he laid down some truf.

Truth be told, I don't give much of a shit about these guys because they don't want to fix themselves.  They'd rather curl up in the fetal position and give up, which unsurprisingly, doesn't make the female legs spread open.  That's their choice and deep down, these fucks know it.  Yet the rut is too deep and hey, they can always e-flirt with Devolution if they are feeling especially lonely.

[FatalT]

I think talking about what women want on GAF is futile for two reasons:

1) People like to bring up hypotheticals like a motherfucker
2) People on GAF don't want to better themselves, they want to bitch and vent about their stupid and shitty lives

The thing about GAF is that these people aren't going to be captains of industry or hell, even a middle management schlub; no, these are the clowns that work the night shift at Gamestop well into their 30s or work as a data entry monkey throughout their career.  Hey, nothing wrong with that, but GAF people are narcissistic and delusional.  Therefore, these people think of themselves as uberfuckstuds or some superautisticaspergersgenius that can see through the bullshit.  Every once in a while, reality smacks them hard in the face (more like brutally beaten) and women is a big part of that hard smack.  So these guys react either by being pathetic white knights or misogynistic trolls.  It's why people lost their shit over Koshiba and thought Himumulu had a meltdown when he laid down some truf.

Truth be told, I don't give much of a shit about these guys because they don't want to fix themselves.  They'd rather curl up in the fetal position and give up, which unsurprisingly, doesn't make the female legs spread open.  That's their choice and deep down, these fucks know it.  Yet the rut is too deep and hey, they can always e-flirt with Devolution if they are feeling especially lonely.

Nicely stated. You're a good man, Charlie Brown.

[pilonv1]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=433378

exposed

[Pringo]

Hey PD, looks like you've got a doppelganger.

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=28480902&postcount=208

[Brehvolution]

I was gonna say the same thing.

[TakingBackSunday]

I read that entire linked blog post in that thread, and I stared at my screen for so long.  I have gone through a transformation 

[magus]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=433429

"it's embarassing that a japanese company barely had any japanese game to show"

"YEA JAPAN SUCKS! GO WESTABOO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

[Mupepe]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=433491

First reply nailed it

[Mupepe]

Dammit, dammit.  I really want to put "What I'm getting from this thread is that women aren't smart enough to take care of themselves, but men are so they should.  Is that correct?" but I don't want to get banned.

[brob]

Devolution doing her thing.

brb gotta go look at some femdom porn and jerk it in pool of white male guilt tears.

[Mupepe]

 

[Mupepe]

Jesus, Devolution is such a cunt dyke.

Even in this thread http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=433493 she somehow turns the guy into a scumbag in her mind.

[Mupepe]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=28503608&postcount=82

That's crazy.  That's my hometown!

[lennedsay]

I posted. Some guy posted something stupid in response. I responded with bitchtude.

Devolution kept going on and on about the fucking pill and how awful it is that women should participate in birth control because the pill is so awful to people, "well I mean I use it, but still!" As a woman, I'm appalled that she thinks the only option is a pill, shot or chemical-filled ring.

Never been on the pill, and never been knocked up. LIKE A BOSS

[brob]

best contraceptive is jesus.

[Great Rumbler]

Never been on the pill, and never been knocked up. LIKE A BOSS

lennedsay

[lennedsay]

Never been on the pill, and never been knocked up. LIKE A BOSS

lennedsay's tight uterus

fixed. 

[Shaka Khan]

Picture from inside Lennedsay's uterus:

[Dickie Dee]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=28503608&postcount=82

That's crazy.  That's my hometown!

How is he putting a picture up of his 2 month old when it was aborted as a fetus? I just picture them digitally aging him by slapping a Tom Selleck mustache on the ultrasound.

[Great Rumbler]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=28503608&postcount=82

That's crazy.  That's my hometown!

How is he putting a picture up of his 2 month old when it was aborted as a fetus? I just picture them digitally aging him by slapping a Tom Selleck mustache on the ultrasound.

The sign on Alamogordo's main thoroughfare shows 35-year-old Greg Fultz holding the outline of an infant

Learn 2 read. 

[Dickie Dee]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=28503608&postcount=82

That's crazy.  That's my hometown!

How is he putting a picture up of his 2 month old when it was aborted as a fetus? I just picture them digitally aging him by slapping a Tom Selleck mustache on the ultrasound.

The sign on Alamogordo's main thoroughfare shows 35-year-old Greg Fultz holding the outline of an infant

Learn 2 read. 

why? when you just did for me

[Great Rumbler]