Game

[Oblivion]

Malek, are you legitimately defending MK Wii U, or is this some elaborate troll?

[Cerveza mas fina]

There's a new crop of 5 year olds born every year. Nintendo knows their role and they are filling it.

Those are playing on their parents tablets and phones.

Hence Nintendo's recent sales titanic.

Malek, are you legitimately defending MK Wii U, or is this some elaborate troll?

I really hope its a troll.

[Madrun Badrun]

There's a new crop of 5 year olds born every year. Nintendo knows their role and they are filling it. You might get lucky and they will allow a handful of games for their busy parents to play.

How do you give birth to a five yearold?  Is this a European thing?

[Don Flamenco]

fuck you guys, i'm maining Wii Fit milf. 

[Don Flamenco]

There's a new crop of 5 year olds born every year. Nintendo knows their role and they are filling it. You might get lucky and they will allow a handful of games for their busy parents to play.

How do you give birth to a five yearold?  Is this a European thing?

[nudemacusers]

well it's good they put this on the 3ds too, since ain't nobody want a wii U.

[ToxicAdam]

How do you give birth to a five yearold?  Is this a European thing?

They will be five and they will have the need for a console or some other gizmo for their parents/grandparents to buy them as their 'big gift'. All these stale old titles are new to their eyes.

[Steve Youngblood]

You guys are hopeless really.

OHMY you can race on walls, the track goes VERTICAL WOOOOW NINTENDO.

The some Nintendo published 3rd party exclusive 

I think the issue is that -- though there are plenty of great criticisms that can be levied at Nintendo in light of this Direct -- Mario Kart really isn't the best target. From what little we've seen, it looks very competent technically given the hardware it's on and honestly does seem to be mixing up the gameplay a fair amount. Your attempts to rag on it seem like some of your more lazy, uninspired trolling wherein you figured it was a safe bet because, after all, what are the chances that a Mario Kart sequel wouldn't just be a lazy cash in? It's low hanging fruit for a Grade D troll such as yourself, and now you just can't back down.

God dammit. I just read the above paragraph, and it reads like first class Nintendo apologist stuff when I've been nothing but a harsh critic of Nintendo for quite some time. I don't know if your ability to evoke this kind of devil's advocate response from me is indicative of the fact that your trolling is better than I give you credit for, or if you're just that fucking stupid, but I think I'm leaning towards the latter.

[Tasty]

Then some Nintendo published 3rd party exclusive 

Also DKC2 looks like GOTY.

[Don Flamenco]

You guys are hopeless really.

OHMY you can race on walls, the track goes VERTICAL WOOOOW NINTENDO.

The some Nintendo published 3rd party exclusive 

I think the issue is that -- though there are plenty of great criticisms that can be levied at Nintendo in light of this Direct -- Mario Kart really isn't the best target. From what little we've seen, it looks very competent technically given the hardware it's on and honestly does seem to be mixing up the gameplay a fair amount. Your attempts to rag on it seem like some of your more lazy, uninspired trolling wherein you figured it was a safe bet because, after all, what are the chances that a Mario Kart sequel wouldn't just be a lazy cash in? It's low hanging fruit for a Grade D troll such as yourself, and now you just can't back down.

God dammit. I just read the above paragraph, and it reads like first class Nintendo apologist stuff when I've been nothing but a harsh critic of Nintendo for quite some time. I don't know if your ability to evoke this kind of devil's advocate response from me is indicative of the fact that your trolling is better than I give you credit for, or if you're just that fucking stupid, but I think I'm leaning towards the latter.

It's okay, i'm defending Wii Fit milf

[treythemovie]

GT mentioned that Nintendo actually had press standing inline to get this announcement.

Considering half of that "press" were fighting each other for Nintendo plushies or wearing power gloves to the event, I'm not surprised Nintendo views them with contempt.

[Phoenix Dark]

I just realized Shaka was not trolling


this is really happening

[Flannel Boy]

Malek, are you legitimately defending MK Wii U, or is this some elaborate troll?

What is there to defend? It's a cart-racing game on a system that's about on par with the 360--what exactly is Kosma expecting?

More screens:

[cool breeze]

Smash Bros Wii U looks pretty nice, especially if you compare it with bland shit like Playstation All Stars.  Running in 1080p.

[demi]

How do you give birth to a five yearold?  Is this a European thing?

They will be five and they will have the need for a console or some other gizmo for their parents/grandparents to buy them as their 'big gift'. All these stale old titles are new to their eyes.

Tell that to Sammy

[Madrun Badrun]

How do you give birth to a five yearold?  Is this a European thing?

They will be five and they will have the need for a console or some other gizmo for their parents/grandparents to buy them as their 'big gift'. All these stale old titles are new to their eyes.

Thank you.  Now I understand.  Though I don't quite get the last part.

[nudemacusers]

You guys are hopeless really.

OHMY you can race on walls, the track goes VERTICAL WOOOOW NINTENDO.

The some Nintendo published 3rd party exclusive 

I think the issue is that -- though there are plenty of great criticisms that can be levied at Nintendo in light of this Direct -- Mario Kart really isn't the best target. From what little we've seen, it looks very competent technically given the hardware it's on and honestly does seem to be mixing up the gameplay a fair amount. Your attempts to rag on it seem like some of your more lazy, uninspired trolling wherein you figured it was a safe bet because, after all, what are the chances that a Mario Kart sequel wouldn't just be a lazy cash in? It's low hanging fruit for a Grade D troll such as yourself, and now you just can't back down.

God dammit. I just read the above paragraph, and it reads like first class Nintendo apologist stuff when I've been nothing but a harsh critic of Nintendo for quite some time. I don't know if your ability to evoke this kind of devil's advocate response from me is indicative of the fact that your trolling is better than I give you credit for, or if you're just that fucking stupid, but I think I'm leaning towards the latter.

It's okay, i'm defending Wii Fit milf

hotter than daisy and peach combined.

also I love wind waker but a bare-bones HD upgrade is not gonna sell me on a new system.

[Don Flamenco]

I can download Wind Waker and have it running nicer looking than that within the hour, using PC parts I bought over a year ago.

[Madrun Badrun]

In all honestly, mario land looks like more fun than watch dogs.

[Flannel Boy]

I can download Wind Waker and have it running nicer looking than that within the hour, using PC parts I bought over a year ago.

It doesn't look like they've added a single polygon to the character models. This is something Kosma can easily troll.

[Mr. Gundam]

Cant Nintendo make one fucking standout next gen game? JUST ONE

(Image removed from quote.)

That does look really awesome, but looks like something you'd see on the PS3/360.

[treythemovie]

There's a new crop of 5 year olds born every year. Nintendo knows their role and they are filling it. You might get lucky and they will allow a handful of games for their busy parents to play.

Pretty much. They know this generation is lost for the wider audience (if they didn't realize that from the get go) and are doubling down on their bread and butter till they can release their handheld/console hybrid in 3 years.

[Great Rumbler]

 

[Madrun Badrun]

Worst part is that unless its three months away Nintendo will delay.  We will get Ds smass in Nov.  wii u in feb. 2015

[Tasty]

Cant Nintendo make one fucking standout next gen game? JUST ONE

(Image removed from quote.)

That does look really awesome, but looks like something you'd see on the PS3/360.

And you were expecting...?

[Don Flamenco]

Wii Fit lady is exactly how I envision Yorda in my fanfic where I rescue her from her world where everybody is mean to her and bring her back to our world and settle down with her and have a family and introduce her to our food

[Vagabond]

Cant Nintendo make one fucking standout next gen game? JUST ONE

(Image removed from quote.)

That does look really awesome, but looks like something you'd see on the PS3/360.

And you were expecting...?

Wii U GPU thread said 2x 360.

[treythemovie]

Worst part is that unless its three months away Nintendo will delay.  We will get Ds smass in Nov.  wii u in feb. 2015

Yeah, having 2 titles in december makes me suspicious. Its unlike Nintendo to let major titles fall past Black Friday so I wouldn't be surprised if they both fell to march 2014. Donkey Kong is the real holiday title for them.

[Don Flamenco]

I can download Wind Waker and have it running nicer looking than that within the hour, using PC parts I bought over a year ago.

It doesn't look like they've added a single polygon to the character models. This is something Kosma can easily troll.

they don't normally do that in HD remakes, it's more the aliasing and face-fucking light bloom that's bothering me.   

It looked like a cartoon before, now it looks like some fan hack where some neckbeard thought he could improve on Nintendo's work by adding shitty lighting. 

[Madrun Badrun]

Didn't brawl come in feb. 

Remember when they announced both smashes, they weren't even in development and they press ganged the dude into making both.  a 2.5 year dev cycle for two games is going to be very hard.

[Oblivion]

Who is this Wii Fit lady you people keep talking about?

[Cerveza mas fina]

What I expected is Nintendo putting some games out there with at least production values equal to Last of Us, Uncharted, Alan Wake, Gears of War. Some big budget shit.

Not uprezzed games with the level editor of NSMB/Mario Kart/Smash Bros on Wii.

[Don Flamenco]

Who is this Wii Fit lady you people keep talking about?

.

[Steve Youngblood]

Didn't brawl come in feb. 

Remember when they announced both smashes, they weren't even in development and they press ganged the dude into making both.  a 2.5 year dev cycle for two games is going to be very hard.

Brawl was... March I think. Yeah, March.

[ToxicAdam]

Tell that to Sammy

Hah .. that's kid is incredible.

That's the other half of their business plan. They get you when you are young and then they get you when you are old(er) and are looking to scratch that nostalgia itch.  So, they try this balancing act of games to get young kids hooked, but still remind adults of the games they played as a kid.

Of course, some never actually get older, they remain young forever.

[Oblivion]

Who is this Wii Fit lady you people keep talking about?

.

Video disabled at work.

[Madrun Badrun]

Didn't brawl come in feb. 

Remember when they announced both smashes, they weren't even in development and they press ganged the dude into making both.  a 2.5 year dev cycle for two games is going to be very hard.

Brawl was... March I think. Yeah, March.

that makes more sense.  No one does feb games. 

[Don Flamenco]

Who is this Wii Fit lady you people keep talking about?

.

Video disabled at work.

She's a character in smash now

[http://static.n1ntendo.nl/file/game/3690/12.jpg

 

both of those redesigns are worse than the first game.   

[treythemovie]

What I expected is Nintendo putting some games out there with at least production values equal to Last of Us, Uncharted, Alan Wake, Gears of War. Some big budget shit.

Not uprezzed games with the level editor of NSMB/Mario Kart/Smash Bros on Wii.

When has Nintendo ever made games like that? What makes you think they'd even be good at it? Only way Wii U's getting stuff like that is if they start bankrolling it from 3rd parties. Just like it was with the gamecube.

[Cerveza mas fina]

Maybe Im expecting too much from Nintendo, they only had 8 years to prepare a game for the HD jump.

Still not one game scream STATE OF THE ART last gen even.

[Cerveza mas fina]

What I expected is Nintendo putting some games out there with at least production values equal to Last of Us, Uncharted, Alan Wake, Gears of War. Some big budget shit.

Not uprezzed games with the level editor of NSMB/Mario Kart/Smash Bros on Wii.

When has Nintendo ever made games like that? What makes you think they'd even be good at it? Only way Wii U's getting stuff like that is if they start bankrolling it from 3rd parties. Just like it was with the gamecube.

Zelda 64. Mario 64.

[TakingBackSunday]

Maybe Im expecting too much from Nintendo, they only had 8 years to prepare a game for the HD jump.

Still not one game scream STATE OF THE ART last gen even.

jesus, u mad

[Flannel Boy]

Not uprezzed games with the level editor of NSMB/Mario Kart/Smash Bros on Wii.

I have no idea how you think that Mario Kart 8 looks like a wii game in 1080 (and 60 frames per second, killzone)?

I just saw the Mario Kart trailer, really just looks like any other Mario Kart.

You mean there are still Mario characters--and they race carts around Mario themed tracks?

In terms of visual quality, it doesn't look like any other Mario Kart
(Image removed from quote.)
(Image removed from quote.)

I mean--the comparison screens are even in nearly the same fucking resolution.

[nudemacusers]

Wii Fit lady is exactly how I envision Yorda in my fanfic where I rescue her from her world where everybody is mean to her and bring her back to our world and settle down with her and have a family and introduce her to our food

is this the rough synopsis for your upcoming amazon kindle worlds novel?

[ToxicAdam]

Zelda:OOT/SM64 weren't really graphical powerhouses, they were more marvels for how they played. It was one thing to make a game in 3D (at the time), it was quite another to actually make it feel smooth and fluid.

[Don Flamenco]

Wii Fit lady is exactly how I envision Yorda in my fanfic where I rescue her from her world where everybody is mean to her and bring her back to our world and settle down with her and have a family and introduce her to our food

is this the rough synopsis for your upcoming amazon kindle worlds novel?

stop trying to steal my ideas!!!! 

[Tasty]

MK U actually looks better than 3D World to me, graphically. Hmm. Maybe Retro's helping out again.

[treythemovie]

Didn't brawl come in feb. 

Remember when they announced both smashes, they weren't even in development and they press ganged the dude into making both.  a 2.5 year dev cycle for two games is going to be very hard.

Brawl was... March I think. Yeah, March.

Early 2008's Wii schedule was soemthing like:

jan -- endless Ocean
Mar -- Smash Bros
apr -- Mario Kart Wii
May -- Wii Fit U


The Wii's dead months had a better lineup then both of the Wii U's holiday seasons combined 

[Oblivion]

IIRC, Miyamoto or Iwata said that Nintendo was hiring outside developers who had experience doing HD games to teach their  own employees.

[Steve Youngblood]

What I expected is Nintendo putting some games out there with at least production values equal to Last of Us, Uncharted, Alan Wake, Gears of War. Some big budget shit.

Not uprezzed games with the level editor of NSMB/Mario Kart/Smash Bros on Wii.

My stance is that it's perfectly possible to call out Nintendo as lazy and cynical, but with Mario Kart that only really works in the broad sense (i.e. the same games as always). Focusing a microscope on it doesn't really work, as it honestly looks like they're trying at first glance. Graphically, it looks as good as any Wii U game I've seen, and in terms of mixing up the gameplay, it appears to be trying. It doesn't really make for the best example of a lazy cash grab when you're citing New Super Mario games as the examples of that. Further, why would Mario Kart need Gears of War production values?

[Oblivion]

Mario Kart is 1080p/60fps?

[treythemovie]

What I expected is Nintendo putting some games out there with at least production values equal to Last of Us, Uncharted, Alan Wake, Gears of War. Some big budget shit.

Not uprezzed games with the level editor of NSMB/Mario Kart/Smash Bros on Wii.

When has Nintendo ever made games like that? What makes you think they'd even be good at it? Only way Wii U's getting stuff like that is if they start bankrolling it from 3rd parties. Just like it was with the gamecube.

Zelda 64. Mario 64.

And Nintendo's still making those types of games. Only the industry's definition of big budget has changed while Nintendo's stayed the same. Also I think you having to go back 15-20 years to find examples kinda proves my point.

[Madrun Badrun]

I understand his point.  I really feel like MK needed licensed cars and adoptive tessellation.  They didn't even have a fucking car onstage that I could applaud to. 

[Cerveza mas fina]

You totally convinced me guys, Nintendo has definitely delivered the goods.

We should see a nice bump in sales in June after all these announcements of fresh new IP's and big budget games with that Nintendo whimsy only they can truly add to the game.

Who needs things like Last of Us or Quantum Break when Nintendo has once again gone out of their way delivering the defining Mario Kart experience.

Is there anything that Sony could do at this moment to counteract all that Nintendo has unveiled? I think not.

[Don Flamenco]

You totally convinced me guys, Nintendo has definitely delivered the goods.

We should see a nice bump in sales in June after all these announcements of fresh new IP's and big budget games with that Nintendo whimsy only they can truly add to the game.

Who needs things like Last of Us or Quantum Break when Nintendo has once again gone out of their way delivering the defining Mario Kart experience.

whoa whoa, i have nothing to defend here except wii fit milf, but lets not kid ourselves-- the new mario kart will probably outsell both of those by a fair margin.   

[EmCeeGrammar]

http://kotaku.com/breaking-smash-bros-news-out-of-nintendos-e3-booth-512667733

bitter

Fucking amazing.  Great e3 for nintendo.  Jaded cruddy fuddy duddies get off my internet.

[Madrun Badrun]

I can't tell if you are an idiot or just polish. 

spoiler (click to show/hide)

I am only joking.

[close]

[Steve Youngblood]

You totally convinced me guys, Nintendo has definitely delivered the goods.

We should see a nice bump in sales in June after all these announcements of fresh new IP's and big budget games with that Nintendo whimsy only they can truly add to the game.

Who needs things like Last of Us or Quantum Break when Nintendo has once again gone out of their way delivering the defining Mario Kart experience.

Yes, because that's what people are harping on. Personally, I expect sales to remain completely in the shitter barring a big price drop. There's a lot not to like about the Wii U, and that remains true after this conference. However, I don't think that criticisms like "I expect Mario Kart to look like a AAA next gen game with a huge budget" or "Mario Kart looks like a Wii game" are really the right complaints. Perhaps you wish that they made something original instead of Mario Kart, and that would be a legitimate, coherent complaint. Instead, you spout your brand of gibberish.

Like I said, I honestly can't believe I'm playing the role of Nintendo advocate here. But you're just that dumb.

[bork]

http://kotaku.com/breaking-smash-bros-news-out-of-nintendos-e3-booth-512667733

bitter

Fucking amazing.  Great e3 for nintendo.  Jaded cruddy fuddy duddies get off my internet.

I know it's Kotaku, but-

Breaking Smash Bros. news out of Nintendo's E3 booth event — along with Mega Man and Animal Crossing's villager, the Wii Fit trainer girl will be joining oh who cares.

*sits at his desk eating pistachios, shaking his head* What are... *sighs* I...

I've got nothing.

To clarify, this is a real thing — a new playable character. Nintendo seemed excited about it. They are completely in touch.

At least the video is hilarious.

They seriously put this up as an article? 

[Cerveza mas fina]

Arvie, you're an ok dude, but if you start calling me names I can link you some posts of yours from the relationship thread so we can settle who the idiot is.