This isn't an rpg, you don't have to pick a label or anything. Just search for knowledge and find your own truth.
I can tell you that this is actually the exact route I took during my own political evolution. Kara gave the fateful pregnant suggestions - first by dapping me for
a Monthly Review article on Israel that I posted and then after we had a conversation later we were discussing some Jason Hickel piece op-ed about how global poverty has actually increased in raw terms and most of the reductions happened in China...
But once you're forced to confront the staggering disparities in the global economy you have to start undoing years of mental damage and indoctrination about free trade and economic development. And once you start questioning the basis of every major institution like the WTO, the IMF, or all of the think tanks that you've been outsourcing all of your thinking to for your adult life, that's when you hit that inflection point and elevate yourself beyond the eternal struggle between the left and right wings of capital. And you find your way to those communities which have been in plain sight this whole time but you couldn't see because you didn't have the right glasses on, communities which have painstakingly preserved and nurtured and expanded on schools of thought for literally hundreds of years (depending on whether you consider Rousseau or Henri de Saint-Simon to be the grandfather of the left).
Not that you'll do that or come to the same conclusions. My point is 1) nobody on Earth is internally consistent and 2) when you make a critical change in your worldview, the overall consistency will come
over time as you try to reconcile and work out all the new contradictions as they come up. It's a long process and the only right way to go about it is to be honest with yourself about your hesitations or hangups, and do all the hard thinking yourself, not delegating to pre-established ideologies or your friends or some wikipedia article.
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It also helps if you're around people with different political views so that you're even aware of what your options are. Two years ago Kara made fun of me for saying I liked George Orwell and I was like "is this motherfucker serious rn" but now I'm 100% borktarded and spend every waking moment reading rosa luxemburg pamphlets saying kautsky's dick is small. you, too, can have this happiness.
