DOJ |OT| SUMMIT NOW SUMMIT NOW

[benjipwns]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/um-is-it-normal-for-someone-to-casually-admit-to-pirating-stuff.156559/

Reminds me of a funny moment I had maybe ten or so years ago. Getting home from school, I had forgot my keys at home, so I waited at the McDonald's up the street until one of my parents got home. A few minutes after getting some nuggets and setting up my Macbook at a booth with an outlet, I noticed there was a cop having a sit a couple tables away from me. Maybe about 30 or so minutes away, the cop came up to me and asked about advice on using MacOS, as he was confused since he just got an Apple as well (don't remember which laptop he had). Upon assisting, he asked me some advice on using uTorrent as it "looked different from the PC version so [he] felt kinda lost". This felt like a huge trap in my brain, so I just said I never heard of the program. I went back to my seat after we were done talking and chilled for maybe another 15-20 minutes before I was able to head home.

[benjipwns]

This thread actually needs to be archived, I haven't laughed this hard in a while.

Another ResetERA.com classic!

[thisismyusername]

ACAB.

Maybe it was a sting. Maybe it was just the piggy wanting to pirate his BBC Planet Earth porn. We'll never know because you were a coward, quoted poster.

[stufte]

I remember downloading a nes emulator and a super mario bros rom when I was 17.

Writing this from jail.

[Leadbelly]

Always kinda irked me how normalized piracy is but I'd never make a scene at work over it lol

It always seemed to me like it was not only normalised but a general rule of internet culture. You share what you have and not try to make money off it. Certainly in the early days, but I guess less so these days.

[Vertigo]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-girlfriend-broke-off-a-6-year-long-relationship-i-am-very-mentally-ill-and-not-sure-how-i-can-handle-it.156608/

Hi, I fucked up and combine that with other things in our relationship, we broke up. I am so unsure how I can go on, my heart is broken. She was my best and only friend, the only person I had in my life that I loved/love. I want her back and I know that's impossible, but I just feel crushed. She was/is my angel, my favourite person, but most importantly, my best friend. Someone I'd never want to be without.



I thought I'd grow old with her, now I know I wont and I just want to die. I have never felt like this. The worst feeling of it all is, after a 6 year relationship, her saying she didn't really get anything good out of it and that also when we broke up last time which lasted a week she was crying when she broke it off, this time it seems like this time she is genuinely happy we are over, meanwhile I am so sad, I am just crushed, it makes me feel super unloved that it seems like she doesn't care. She did end up crying in the end. But most of the conversation, which was not  fight at all, she didn't seem to care.



I know I will get a "time heals all" response and I guess maybe it does, but I don't see it ever healing, ever. I have Borderline Personality Disorder so I am very scared and emotionally destroyed by rejection, so this isn't going well, lots of suicidal ideation and self harm thoughts, I can't be without her, I at least need her as my best friend, I have no family or friends, she is literally the only person I talk to because my parents abused me and when I got really bad mentally 6 years ago all my friends stopped speaking to me because I stopped drinking and partying. I am seeing my psych this afternoon... I just feel like my heart has been stomped on. Plus I am 26, unemployed, mentally ill, can't leave my house and on disability pension. Who in the living hell would want to ever date me?



Someone please help or something... I dunno.

Was so tempted to post a you played yourself gif


EDIT:
Actually it maybe what he needs.

Looking at the OP post history it seems like he was chatting to another girl on Tinder and got caught.



You live and you learn OP.

pretty much, she said she was gay and no longer wanted to have sex with males, but she didnt want to break up, then 3 months went by and she hadn't made up her mind on how we move forward, so she said "lets have an open relationship starting next week" But I started talking to a girl literally like 4 days before the open relationship officially started so she told me thats cheating and she broke up with me.

 

[stufte]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-girlfriend-broke-off-a-6-year-long-relationship-i-am-very-mentally-ill-and-not-sure-how-i-can-handle-it.156608/

Hi, I fucked up and combine that with other things in our relationship, we broke up. I am so unsure how I can go on, my heart is broken. She was my best and only friend, the only person I had in my life that I loved/love. I want her back and I know that's impossible, but I just feel crushed. She was/is my angel, my favourite person, but most importantly, my best friend. Someone I'd never want to be without.



I thought I'd grow old with her, now I know I wont and I just want to die. I have never felt like this. The worst feeling of it all is, after a 6 year relationship, her saying she didn't really get anything good out of it and that also when we broke up last time which lasted a week she was crying when she broke it off, this time it seems like this time she is genuinely happy we are over, meanwhile I am so sad, I am just crushed, it makes me feel super unloved that it seems like she doesn't care. She did end up crying in the end. But most of the conversation, which was not  fight at all, she didn't seem to care.



I know I will get a "time heals all" response and I guess maybe it does, but I don't see it ever healing, ever. I have Borderline Personality Disorder so I am very scared and emotionally destroyed by rejection, so this isn't going well, lots of suicidal ideation and self harm thoughts, I can't be without her, I at least need her as my best friend, I have no family or friends, she is literally the only person I talk to because my parents abused me and when I got really bad mentally 6 years ago all my friends stopped speaking to me because I stopped drinking and partying. I am seeing my psych this afternoon... I just feel like my heart has been stomped on. Plus I am 26, unemployed, mentally ill, can't leave my house and on disability pension. Who in the living hell would want to ever date me?



Someone please help or something... I dunno.

Was so tempted to post a you played yourself gif


EDIT:

She was my best and only friend

[VomKriege]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-girlfriend-broke-off-a-6-year-long-relationship-i-am-very-mentally-ill-and-not-sure-how-i-can-handle-it.156608/post-26998104

 

[VomKriege]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-girlfriend-broke-off-a-6-year-long-relationship-i-am-very-mentally-ill-and-not-sure-how-i-can-handle-it.156608/post-26998310

 

[benjipwns]

I am disabled enough that more than 10 minutes outside leads to long term mental and physical pain.

[VomKriege]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-girlfriend-broke-off-a-6-year-long-relationship-i-am-very-mentally-ill-and-not-sure-how-i-can-handle-it.156608/post-26998392

OP should stop posting.

[benjipwns]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-girlfriend-broke-off-a-6-year-long-relationship-i-am-very-mentally-ill-and-not-sure-how-i-can-handle-it.156608/post-26998392

OP should stop posting.

Can we just support OP in his time of need. He's not painting himself as the good guy or anything, he's just hurting and turning to Era for emotional support.

[Hermit]

Kinda feel bad for some of these people

[benjipwns]

They had to make a thread because Ketkat hasn't posted in the Mental Health Era community thread since September due to the constant acephobic and transphobic hate all over the forum.

[Potato]

Kinda feel bad for some of these people

Nope. Not even once.

[nachobro]

Well here's the thing, she has lived with me for 6 years, never paid rent, internet, anything like that, it was all paid for by me. She has no where to go, so even though she dumped me yesterday, due to my fear of abandonment I asked her to continue living with me, she still is texting me love you when she went to work this morning, still sleeping in my bed, giving me hugs and kisses, I am still paying rent.... but we are broken up.... I feel like she is using me but I am so afraid of being alone that I don't want to say anything to her. I didn't include this in the OP because it makes me look way more pathetic and like a push over

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-girlfriend-broke-off-a-6-year-long-relationship-i-am-very-mentally-ill-and-not-sure-how-i-can-handle-it.156608/post-26998934

[Nintex]

I am disabled enough that more than 10 minutes outside leads to long term mental and physical pain.

[stufte]

Is the poster one of those people who are like...allergic to the sun

Actually just a ghost and doesn't know it. They made a movie about it.

[benjipwns]

Is the poster one of those people who are like...allergic to the sun

If someone identifies as Nosferatu why do you think it's any of your business to question their identity?

[nachobro]

ol powder looking bitch

[jorma]

She probably put peanut butter in her crack, would put nothing past the queen of the thots.

This wasn't even the first time 

https://twitter.com/SHAUNNN__/status/1201028498036592640

not even the tenth time 

https://streamable.com/22vdf

[Nintex]

Doggo likes fish 

[Potato]

Well here's the thing, she has lived with me for 6 years, never paid rent, internet, anything like that, it was all paid for by me. She has no where to go, so even though she dumped me yesterday, due to my fear of abandonment I asked her to continue living with me, she still is texting me love you when she went to work this morning, still sleeping in my bed, giving me hugs and kisses, I am still paying rent.... but we are broken up.... I feel like she is using me but I am so afraid of being alone that I don't want to say anything to her. I didn't include this in the OP because it makes me look way more pathetic and like a push over

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-girlfriend-broke-off-a-6-year-long-relationship-i-am-very-mentally-ill-and-not-sure-how-i-can-handle-it.156608/post-26998934
 

Great couple.

One doesn't work or pay her way. The other is a literal shut-in who doesn't leave the house for longer than 10 minutes.

What does this guy do for a living that he can pay rent and support a dependent while not leaving the house?

We know Cereal doesn't even pay his mods, so posting all day on REEEsetera isn't it...

[benjipwns]

What does this guy do for a living that he can pay rent and support a dependent while not leaving the house?

Receives disability.

[stufte]

What does this guy do for a living that he can pay rent and support a dependent while not leaving the house?

Receives disability.

 

[Potato]

What does this guy do for a living that he can pay rent and support a dependent while not leaving the house?

Receives disability.

How the fuck are two people living from one disability allowance?

I don't care what country you live in, that is not viable even in those countries with the best social safety nets.

[benjipwns]

They live in Australia.

They seem to have made a thread five days ago that's now deleted: https://www.resetera.com/threads/i-have-bpd-and-i-am-about-to-go-through-a-breakup-anyone-dealt-with-this-before.155911/

Still in the Google Cache though:

Okay so things haven't been great for a while, then I really fucked up because I was wanting validation and to feel like I was still desirable (talking to a girl on tinder). She found out, and long story short she doesn't know if she wants to stay with me. We are doing couples therapy next week but the wait is killing me, I feel so sick and just distressed, I have no one in my life except her, no friends, family, nothing, only her and I love her so much. If she leaves me I don't know how I can continue living. We have been together and living together for 6 years, I don't know how I'd adjust from that...... Plus I am disabled/mentally ill and can't leave my house, so who would ever want to date someone like me, I'll be alone forever. but even besides that I just don't want to lose my girlfriend.

How do I deal with this? I don't want to kill myself but it seems like the only way out. It makes it hard too, because she keeps saying she doesn't know if she can stay with me, but in the mean time she's still giving me kisses, cuddles and saying how much she loves me. I am just so confused and terrified. I can't be alone. no one will ever want to be with me. Someone help. I am home alone right now and I am scared of what I'll do.

She doesn't have anywhere to go, she can't afford to move out, she just started a new job in a new city, I help her a lot with money, she has no car. So I am hoping this makes her want to stay. I am just so fucking afraid. I want to die. I have made a lot of progress on my eating disorder but never sought treatment for my BPD and now it's all blown up in my face. I have made an appointment to start DBT for next week the day before the couples counselling.

Please be kind even if you think I am pathetic or an asshole, I am scared for myself and my relationship and I feel terrible for being doing an asshole thing.

EDIT: and yes, besides starting treatment for my BPD next week, and the couples counselling, I also saw my psych two days ago and spoke to her about it, so I am seeking professional help, I just want to know if anyone here has been through similar.

Thank you, this means a lot, and you are right, that I am so willing to change, I have spent hours today trying to get the first appointment possible for helping my BPD. I need and want to change. But unfortunately you are right that I don't believe that it can get better. I am a fuck up, I cut my wrists so many times the last few days and I haven't done that in a while.

Back in October: https://www.resetera.com/threads/anyone-here-have-borderline-personality-disorder-and-gone-through-a-breakup.146850/

I'm so scared, about a week and a half ago my girlfriend told me she thinks shes gay, and im 100% supportive of her, I dont want her to repress her sexuality, that's not fair and it's not her fault. But, I am absolutely terrified, she wants to stay with me because she loves me and says that her emotions are stronger than her sexual desire, but she has said we can't have sex again, she doesn't like having sex with men. So... I reluctantly agreed. But I am not an idiot, I know she will break up with me, I don't know how I would live without her, it's been 6 years, I've been with her since i was 20 years old, I was only diagnosed with BPD last year but I can see how it has been affecting me forever, I don't know how I can continue to go on living when she leaves?

I am on disability pension due to my BPD, OCD, PTSD and can't leave my house due to Agoraphobia and Panic Disorder, I will never be able to find someone to be with when she leaves, I am so afraid, she's my best friend and I don't want to lose her and I don't want to be alone forever.... please help me guys, im so scared.

To top it off, I am starting to realise that the thoughts I've suppressed my whole life about being trans may actually be real and I am looking into a psych that specialises in that area, but I don't want to tell me girlfriend about that, I am suffering huge dysphoria right now, and not just about gender but about life, I am so scared about being alone, I don't know how I'd continue to live, I am just feeling so trapped and terrified right now. I don't have family, my mum is an alt-right weirdo, my sisters have their own things, my dad abused me, I have no one except my girlfriend

I'm in Australia, I am very paranoid and hate those lines because I don't trust that they wont send emergency services and have me hospitalised, I'm not suicidal or anything so I don't want to go through that hassle.

Back in June: https://www.resetera.com/threads/i-need-help-with-my-mother-shes-fallen-in-to-the-alt-right-crowd-and-as-my-carer-things-are-getting-really-hard.125008/

Hi guys, so long story short, I am disabled and require my mother to pretty much get all my food and organise all my doctors appointments and whatever else. but the last 3 or so years she's gone insane, I can't have a 10 minute conversation with her without her telling me about "big pharma" or Hilary running pedophile rings (we arent even american so I dont even know why shes so obsessed with hilary, but its relentless) she thinks that the reason kids in Africa look starving is because Bill Gates is giving them "vaccines" to kill them for population control. I rang her yesterday and asked her if she could get me medicine from the pharmacy and she started telling me how many "chemtrails" are in the air right now poisoning us. Even simple things like dogs being desexed to her is a conspiracy by the government because for some reason she thinks they dont want us to have dogs.

I don't know what to do, relying on someone that is making my life hell is really really hard, its gotten so bad that I legit have felt like killing myself to escape her, being disabled means my life is already pretty crappy but all day the only person I have on this planet to look after me and care for me is obsessed with far right conspiracies and nazi style views on race. She is obsessed and no matter how many times I tell her I don't care and that it's all bullshit she keeps trying to "Brain Force Plus" me. it's not fair for her to do this to me when I have severe mental problems and physical problems.

What can I do? if I don't have her I will have no one but honestly, at this point it feels like mental abuse and that she's purposefully trying to make me upset or angry. I have been contemplating suicide and I know you guys may think that's an overreaction to this, but just picture being trapped 24/7 with a nazi/alt-right person who wont shut up about it and being completely defenseless.

Is there anything you guys can suggest? I'm at my wits end.

Sorry if this is a dumb thread, I don't know where to go for help.

My disabilities are weird, I am mentally disabled due to a brain trauma I had when crashed my motorbike as a child so I find it extremely hard to concentrate on stuff and I start panicking and can become so bad I can start having minor convulsions. Physically I can walk probably about 30 metres before I need to sit for around half an hour due to that same accident. My spine was completely messed up in the accident.

I am unsure whats available where I am, I'm very remote in an Aboriginal community so services are very very limited. But there has to be something and I will definitely start googling and try to get some info

I did a while ago but everything I found was at least 2 hours away from me because the government doesnt fund aboriginal majority areas very well. and yeah I receive my social security money directly into my bank account, but she has full control over my social security account because shes marked as my carer, so she can ring and cancel it whenever she wants which scares me because she is vindictive enough to maybe do it, I need to get that right taken away from her but I dont know what to do.

But... wait:

I did have a girlfriend at one point but..... yeah, didnt work out. She couldn't handle all the stress of my mother combined with my disabilities, my mother would always say horrible things about her and it ran her off.

[Vertigo]

Well here's the thing, she has lived with me for 6 years, never paid rent, internet, anything like that, it was all paid for by me. She has no where to go, so even though she dumped me yesterday, due to my fear of abandonment I asked her to continue living with me, she still is texting me love you when she went to work this morning, still sleeping in my bed, giving me hugs and kisses, I am still paying rent.... but we are broken up.... I feel like she is using me but I am so afraid of being alone that I don't want to say anything to her. I didn't include this in the OP because it makes me look way more pathetic and like a push over

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-girlfriend-broke-off-a-6-year-long-relationship-i-am-very-mentally-ill-and-not-sure-how-i-can-handle-it.156608/post-26998934

I'm going to guess she's not very attractive... As if she was she would have been out of there years ago.

[Snoopycat_]

But... wait:

I did have a girlfriend at one point but..... yeah, didnt work out. She couldn't handle all the stress of my mother combined with my disabilities, my mother would always say horrible things about her and it ran her off.

And there it is. These alphabet people just can't do anything right.

Gawd.

Come back Amirox. All is forgiven.

[NekoFever]

This character seems to have dropped the coming out as trans to keep his lesbian girlfriend thread from a few weeks ago from his backstory.

[benjipwns]

 

[benjipwns]

no bully pls

[benjipwns]

April 1st: https://www.resetera.com/threads/mental-health-era-ot2-community-and-understanding.95803/post-19444604

After 6 longs years of being debilitatingly sick from gastroparesis and OCD I have started trying medicinal cannabis and it seems to be working, I am also now prescribed Testosterone as my Test levels were really really low. This combination has worked pretty good for my mental health. Except I am having vivid dreams about my ex from over 6 years ago, dreams we are getting back together and all this stuff, then because the dreams are super vivid I am obsessing about it all day.

Problem is, I have a girlfriend that I love, but man, my current girlfriend and I have been together for 6 years and she is just miserable all the time, sex is bland, she never seems to enjoy it or initiate it, she is always angry, always, things are going well for her, she is studying nursing at university, she doesnt pay any rent, my mother gives her money so she can study and doesnt have to worry about working and study at the same time. But she is just angry all the time, its like she cant see how much is being handed to her and how much her life is going well, my mother has given her a car to drive, free gas/petrol for the car, free rent and a wage but she doesnt seem to understand that not many people are that privileged and she still complains, she does have depression and was sexually assaulted as a teen by her step father so I get she has problems herself but she REFUSES, I mean vehemently REFUSES to go see someone and get help, she thinks they will make it worse, I cant handle it, and then the dreams of my ex make it worse because I reminisce on being with her as when I was with her I wasnt sick, I was healthy, outgoing and happy, for some reason my mind wants me to try and get back with her despite me not talking to her more than half a decade and her being mentally abusive.

Sorry, this is rambling and may be confusing, but long story short, I am having really vivid dreams of my ex from over 6 years ago. I miss her and voices in my head tell me to contact her (I am not going to contact her), my current girlfriend of 6 years who has stuck by me during my hospital stays and everything else is just miserable all the time and I am missing having a loving happy person in my life and for some reason my mind wants me to run back to an emotionally abusive ex just because I was healthy and happy back then. My psych brought up BPD with me and suggested I may have it, maybe I do, I do have the obsession with never being alone and wanting multiple partners incase I am abandoned.

Sorry guys for the long post, I just needed to vent and maybe get advice. As I am having panic attacks over this, I feel like getting in car and either driving into a tree or driving a long way away and going missing, i dont want to deal with these dreams or my angry girlfriend anymore.

[benjipwns]

Hey Khaled, thank you for opening up about this. While I can understand why you might be having dreams about your ex during this moment, it's important to take a step back and realize that you might be romanticizing the relationship some. All relationships have rough patches, and this would be true if you were with your ex as well, especially if she was mentally abusive.

Since your girlfriend has depression, it's possible that she's aware of how privileged she is to have all of this support, but that she is still struggling because depression isn't as easy to fix as that for some people. For some people, it can actually exacerbate the issue as they wonder why they still feel that way despite everything afforded to them. I do think that you have the right idea about her needing to see a professional for help, would you be willing to elaborate a little on why she doesn't want to see one? You say that she feels they'll make it worse, but do you know why she feels that way?

doesn't seem to have replied to this

[benjipwns]

SugarNoodles ban has now been "duration pending" for nearly three weeks:
https://www.resetera.com/threads/vegan-sues-burger-king-for-cooking-impossible-whopper-on-meat-grill-and-something-about-rats.154301/post-26663256

User banned (duration pending): inflammatory comparison and accusation against other members, recently banned for identical behaviour, and a long history of infractions for hostility and inflammatory accusations.

Lol “well if you tell us not to be shitty then we’ll just go back to when things were worse and it’ll be all your fault”

straight out of the alt right playbook. I can’t.

This is why droves feel unsafe and are leaving in marginalized wars it's based on.

[stufte]

The fact that he landed a girlfriend at all is a fucking miracle. Though that may have something to do with him reeling in a naive 16yr old.

[Drainage]

Is the poster one of those people who are like...allergic to the sun

If someone identifies as Nosferatu why do you think it's any of your business to question their identity?

There is only one safe place for desperate Nosferatu, and it’s not era

[Potato]

Wow @benji, nice work.

On first impression, this person does seem full of shit. However, I will say that some of my scepticism is removed considering some of the information they have posted.

I think this is an actual mentally unhealthy person and most of their posts are delusions.

[Snoopycat_]

The fact that he landed a girlfriend at all is a fucking miracle. Though that may have something to do with him reeling in a naive 16yr old.

So, Amirox's lover was 9 and nobody ever called her naive

[Potato]

At the risk of sounding completely racist, being an Indigenous Australian in a remote area means they would definitely be receiving enough social security to live and support a non-working partner.

[nachobro]

The fact that he landed a girlfriend at all is a fucking miracle. Though that may have something to do with him reeling in a naive 16yr old.

get a teenager to rely entirely on you and your family for survival for six years and wonder why they resent you and want to get away brehs

[benjipwns]

Amirox

Who? I only know a Christopher John Goldberg, not anyone by this name.

[Joe Molotov]

They live in Australia.

They seem to have made a thread five days ago that's now deleted: https://www.resetera.com/threads/i-have-bpd-and-i-am-about-to-go-through-a-breakup-anyone-dealt-with-this-before.155911/

Still in the Google Cache though:

Okay so things haven't been great for a while, then I really fucked up because I was wanting validation and to feel like I was still desirable (talking to a girl on tinder). She found out, and long story short she doesn't know if she wants to stay with me. We are doing couples therapy next week but the wait is killing me, I feel so sick and just distressed, I have no one in my life except her, no friends, family, nothing, only her and I love her so much. If she leaves me I don't know how I can continue living. We have been together and living together for 6 years, I don't know how I'd adjust from that...... Plus I am disabled/mentally ill and can't leave my house, so who would ever want to date someone like me, I'll be alone forever. but even besides that I just don't want to lose my girlfriend.

How do I deal with this? I don't want to kill myself but it seems like the only way out. It makes it hard too, because she keeps saying she doesn't know if she can stay with me, but in the mean time she's still giving me kisses, cuddles and saying how much she loves me. I am just so confused and terrified. I can't be alone. no one will ever want to be with me. Someone help. I am home alone right now and I am scared of what I'll do.

She doesn't have anywhere to go, she can't afford to move out, she just started a new job in a new city, I help her a lot with money, she has no car. So I am hoping this makes her want to stay. I am just so fucking afraid. I want to die. I have made a lot of progress on my eating disorder but never sought treatment for my BPD and now it's all blown up in my face. I have made an appointment to start DBT for next week the day before the couples counselling.

Please be kind even if you think I am pathetic or an asshole, I am scared for myself and my relationship and I feel terrible for being doing an asshole thing.

EDIT: and yes, besides starting treatment for my BPD next week, and the couples counselling, I also saw my psych two days ago and spoke to her about it, so I am seeking professional help, I just want to know if anyone here has been through similar.

Thank you, this means a lot, and you are right, that I am so willing to change, I have spent hours today trying to get the first appointment possible for helping my BPD. I need and want to change. But unfortunately you are right that I don't believe that it can get better. I am a fuck up, I cut my wrists so many times the last few days and I haven't done that in a while.

Back in October: https://www.resetera.com/threads/anyone-here-have-borderline-personality-disorder-and-gone-through-a-breakup.146850/

I'm so scared, about a week and a half ago my girlfriend told me she thinks shes gay, and im 100% supportive of her, I dont want her to repress her sexuality, that's not fair and it's not her fault. But, I am absolutely terrified, she wants to stay with me because she loves me and says that her emotions are stronger than her sexual desire, but she has said we can't have sex again, she doesn't like having sex with men. So... I reluctantly agreed. But I am not an idiot, I know she will break up with me, I don't know how I would live without her, it's been 6 years, I've been with her since i was 20 years old, I was only diagnosed with BPD last year but I can see how it has been affecting me forever, I don't know how I can continue to go on living when she leaves?

I am on disability pension due to my BPD, OCD, PTSD and can't leave my house due to Agoraphobia and Panic Disorder, I will never be able to find someone to be with when she leaves, I am so afraid, she's my best friend and I don't want to lose her and I don't want to be alone forever.... please help me guys, im so scared.

To top it off, I am starting to realise that the thoughts I've suppressed my whole life about being trans may actually be real and I am looking into a psych that specialises in that area, but I don't want to tell me girlfriend about that, I am suffering huge dysphoria right now, and not just about gender but about life, I am so scared about being alone, I don't know how I'd continue to live, I am just feeling so trapped and terrified right now. I don't have family, my mum is an alt-right weirdo, my sisters have their own things, my dad abused me, I have no one except my girlfriend

I'm in Australia, I am very paranoid and hate those lines because I don't trust that they wont send emergency services and have me hospitalised, I'm not suicidal or anything so I don't want to go through that hassle.

Back in June: https://www.resetera.com/threads/i-need-help-with-my-mother-shes-fallen-in-to-the-alt-right-crowd-and-as-my-carer-things-are-getting-really-hard.125008/

Hi guys, so long story short, I am disabled and require my mother to pretty much get all my food and organise all my doctors appointments and whatever else. but the last 3 or so years she's gone insane, I can't have a 10 minute conversation with her without her telling me about "big pharma" or Hilary running pedophile rings (we arent even american so I dont even know why shes so obsessed with hilary, but its relentless) she thinks that the reason kids in Africa look starving is because Bill Gates is giving them "vaccines" to kill them for population control. I rang her yesterday and asked her if she could get me medicine from the pharmacy and she started telling me how many "chemtrails" are in the air right now poisoning us. Even simple things like dogs being desexed to her is a conspiracy by the government because for some reason she thinks they dont want us to have dogs.

I don't know what to do, relying on someone that is making my life hell is really really hard, its gotten so bad that I legit have felt like killing myself to escape her, being disabled means my life is already pretty crappy but all day the only person I have on this planet to look after me and care for me is obsessed with far right conspiracies and nazi style views on race. She is obsessed and no matter how many times I tell her I don't care and that it's all bullshit she keeps trying to "Brain Force Plus" me. it's not fair for her to do this to me when I have severe mental problems and physical problems.

What can I do? if I don't have her I will have no one but honestly, at this point it feels like mental abuse and that she's purposefully trying to make me upset or angry. I have been contemplating suicide and I know you guys may think that's an overreaction to this, but just picture being trapped 24/7 with a nazi/alt-right person who wont shut up about it and being completely defenseless.

Is there anything you guys can suggest? I'm at my wits end.

Sorry if this is a dumb thread, I don't know where to go for help.

My disabilities are weird, I am mentally disabled due to a brain trauma I had when crashed my motorbike as a child so I find it extremely hard to concentrate on stuff and I start panicking and can become so bad I can start having minor convulsions. Physically I can walk probably about 30 metres before I need to sit for around half an hour due to that same accident. My spine was completely messed up in the accident.

I am unsure whats available where I am, I'm very remote in an Aboriginal community so services are very very limited. But there has to be something and I will definitely start googling and try to get some info

I did a while ago but everything I found was at least 2 hours away from me because the government doesnt fund aboriginal majority areas very well. and yeah I receive my social security money directly into my bank account, but she has full control over my social security account because shes marked as my carer, so she can ring and cancel it whenever she wants which scares me because she is vindictive enough to maybe do it, I need to get that right taken away from her but I dont know what to do.

But... wait:

I did have a girlfriend at one point but..... yeah, didnt work out. She couldn't handle all the stress of my mother combined with my disabilities, my mother would always say horrible things about her and it ran her off.

I'm pretty sure I read all those here when they were posted, probably by you.

[Tripon]

https://twitter.com/ReeraTakes/status/1201605901880381441

The dude was a PM player too. 

[benjipwns]

I'm pretty sure I read all those here when they were posted, probably by you.

i said no bully, mods help

spoiler (click to show/hide)

he's posted the same exact story in almost the same format like 20 times

[close]

[skullstorm]

She probably put peanut butter in her crack, would put nothing past the queen of the thots.

This wasn't even the first time 

https://twitter.com/SHAUNNN__/status/1201028498036592640

not even the tenth time 

https://streamable.com/22vdf

Okay wow 

Where is the :dahell smiley when you need it 

[Great Rumbler]

She probably put peanut butter in her crack, would put nothing past the queen of the thots.

This wasn't even the first time 

https://twitter.com/SHAUNNN__/status/1201028498036592640

not even the tenth time 

https://streamable.com/22vdf

 

[nudemacusers]

hobbes trying his hardest to generate some outrage but just exposed himself as never having worked for even a decently large company

https://www.resetera.com/threads/ea-and-other-studios-apparently-have-policies-that-require-developers-to-gather-permission-before-producing-any-creative-works-outside-of-work.156355/

That’s nothing, look at mr Phoenix Wright “not in my EU!” getting butt blasted all over the thread

[benjipwns]

Can we at least agree that this is an US specific problem?
All of the people that live in the EU have stated to have never heard of something so extreme.

Because there seems to be a disconnection in understanding here.

Never worked outside the EU, and I had such clauses in my contracts, yes. It is definitely not an US-only thing.

i am always baffled how Era on the one hand positions itself as this gathering place for gaming insiders, yet frequently half the posters are baffled when hearing about something that is absolute standard in the industry (whether the rule is bad or not doesn’t change fact that a ton of people on this forum who love to tell devs what to do are rather clueless about the industry).

Sure. The standard is in the EU that if you work for a company like in my case Disney, I'm not allowed to write a book about a girl that has a rare disease. That's what is in your made up contract? Sure, I believe you, I really do. Talk about posting in bad faith.

you wanted to write this and disney told you that you couldn’t?

No they did not, because there's no such clause.

Weird that I worked for Disney for years, shipping a multiplatform title with them, AND had that clause in my contract

Really, really weird

Just strange

[Switters]

hobbes trying his hardest to generate some outrage but just exposed himself as never having worked for even a decently large company

https://www.resetera.com/threads/ea-and-other-studios-apparently-have-policies-that-require-developers-to-gather-permission-before-producing-any-creative-works-outside-of-work.156355/

This is hilarious because I had to sign the same sort of thing when I was a manager at BLOCKBUSTER VIDEO because it came out that Quentin wrote Reservoir Dogs while working at a video store.

It was 1997.

Hobbes is an empty vacuous jello mold of stupidity and wasted effort. A lot like all those scripts I was working on while working at BLOCKBUSTER VIDEO.

[benjipwns]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-girlfriend-broke-off-a-6-year-long-relationship-i-am-very-mentally-ill-and-not-sure-how-i-can-handle-it.156608/post-27004780

Can people please stop misgendering Khaled, she is trans/non-binary

So much this! Do better Era.

[nudemacusers]

How would anyone know that?

[nudemacusers]

Also you’ll be happy to know that the iPhone does not capitalize mr but does capitalize Phoenix Wright. This is the world progressive misandrists want!!!!

[nudemacusers]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/tiktok-has-been-secretly-hiding-videos-created-by-disabled-fat-and-lgbtq-users.156655/

This is awful.










Those are the funniest videos.

[remy]

How would anyone know that?

Obviously from their female presenting name DJ Khaled

If half that shit is true the last thing someone with borderline needs is to be cheerled into insanity by resetera members.

[nachobro]

unemployed
mentally ill
can't leave the house
trans

[benjipwns]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/tiktok-has-been-secretly-hiding-videos-created-by-disabled-fat-and-lgbtq-users.156655/

The world traded its ethics and independence for cheap mass produced garbage

We've given an oppressive government with oppressive corporate interests unprecedented control on a global stage

We're fucked

I've been telling people to stop using it. Nobody listens.

CW: Productive Discussion™ Inside

woooow. Fuck TikTok. and Fuck China for this bullshit.

Fuck TikTok

tiktok is trash. Fuck tiktok, fuck china

Fuck Tik Tok

pieces of shit

ShitTok.

Fuck TikTok.

#BringBackVine

Butbut.. gays!!! BAD!!! Fuck China.

[close]

[Tripon]

unemployed
mentally ill
can't leave the house
trans

(Image removed from quote.)

If you believe everything from that poster, do they believe that the fucker is a groomer as well? I mean, holy shit.

[Momo]

(Image removed from quote.)
https://www.resetera.com/threads/steam-april-2018-aaa-big-hole.33202/post-7104102

no one ever feels safe or welcome but they never leave

(Image removed from quote.)
https://www.resetera.com/threads/were-you-identified-as-gifted-and-talented-in-school-or-went-to-a-magnet-program.41546/post-7786878

3 week ban for saying god knows what to this dude in PM lmao

[Momo]

She probably put peanut butter in her crack, would put nothing past the queen of the thots.

This wasn't even the first time 

https://twitter.com/SHAUNNN__/status/1201028498036592640

not even the tenth time 

https://streamable.com/22vdf

Okay wow 

Where is the :dahell smiley when you need it 

Ya thotzilla is a scourge lmao, my streamer friends always complain about her