THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: bagofeyes on July 25, 2007, 08:46:17 PM

Title: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: bagofeyes on July 25, 2007, 08:46:17 PM
Let's do them!

I've got heaps, but first I'll go with: I wear the same pair of pants to work every day, and I haven't cleaned them in about 4 months lol
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Madrun Badrun on July 25, 2007, 08:48:56 PM
 :lol  thats awesome. 
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 08:51:46 PM
i once sharted so bad in a target that it soaked my underwear with poo-water. i had to get all solid snake to sneak out of the building without anyone seeing my moistened stankass, and then i had to drive six miles home sitting on it on leather recaro seats. :(

this led into the Worst Diarrhea Ever (tm), so i was in freakin' PAIN the whole time. oh man, it fuckin' SCOURED my ass when it came out. i never ate at that las margaritas again!
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Madrun Badrun on July 25, 2007, 08:53:37 PM
Not so awesome.   :-\
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 08:54:36 PM
after that, i fucked my grandmother's corpse in the eye socket, and jizzed into her maggot-ridden brain juice.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Mupepe on July 25, 2007, 08:58:36 PM
i once ate a girls butthole out... numerous times
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 09:01:00 PM
 :-X

man, despite my jokes, i don't get the anal fixation so many folks have. wtf!
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: bagofeyes on July 25, 2007, 09:02:24 PM
Me neither. Poo comes out of there  :yuck
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Cyanista on July 25, 2007, 09:03:25 PM
Gross, that's where the poo comes.

Once a guy I was sort of dating showed up for a surprise visit and when he went into my bathroom...my roommate's dog had gotten into my trashcan and torn a bloody tampon into nasty red bits.

YAY.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 25, 2007, 09:10:11 PM
Sort of keeping with the theme Cyanista presented, my old dawg Rusty snuck one of my, um.... spunked up kleenexes from my bedroom and decided to tear it up in front of my family chilling in the living room.

I don't know why dogs LOVE fouled up jizzrags but goddamn. Cats don't do that shit.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Mr. Gundam on July 25, 2007, 09:11:50 PM
i once ate a girls butthole out... numerous times

As long as they've showered, I don't have a problem with it.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 25, 2007, 09:13:18 PM
As long as they've showered, I don't have a problem with it.


Me neither and I'm surprised at the "ew" responses.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Mupepe on July 25, 2007, 09:15:05 PM
:-X

man, despite my jokes, i don't get the anal fixation so many folks have. wtf!
dunno.  i like tossing a girls salad and fingering her butthole and doing them in the butt.  maybe i really am gay... or bi.  I'm an ass-man for sure.  I'll take a nice ass over a nice rack any day.  And I just love to lick stuff.  I love tongue action.  Mmmmmm.  the best thing is when you're having sex, just grabbing a nice handful of ass and going harder.  I don't know what's wrong with me.  And is it weird that after all of this, I find farts (male or female) to be utterly disgusting.  I don't mind if a girl accidentally lets one squeak.  Hey, that's natural.  But if a girl is like "hehe  *fart*" I would deck her in the face and then throw up.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 25, 2007, 09:16:18 PM
I'll take a nice ass over a nice rack any day.


This is not a statement I cannot agree with. Asses are cool but to me, they're an afterthought.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: CajoleJuice on July 25, 2007, 09:17:10 PM
I'd do pretty much anything sex related at this point.

And titties > ass.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Beezy on July 25, 2007, 09:17:26 PM
But if a girl is like "hehe  *fart*" I would deck her in the face and then throw up.
:lol
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Mupepe on July 25, 2007, 09:17:42 PM
I think it's my hispanic side coming out.  But a nice pear shaped ass is godly.  chicken tastes like girl butts
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Mr. Gundam on July 25, 2007, 09:19:13 PM
:-X

man, despite my jokes, i don't get the anal fixation so many folks have. wtf!
dunno.  i like tossing a girls salad and fingering her butthole and doing them in the butt.

You're not gay, nor are you bi, you're just awesome in bed, like me.

I'd never force this on a girl who didn't enjoy it, though. Fortunately, the wife likes it.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 25, 2007, 09:20:19 PM
It might be the hispanic thing. I watch Univision with the sound off sometimes and it's all these bitches looking like Latina Naomis, pre-tweek

I'd never force this on a girl who didn't enjoy it, though. Fortunately, the wife likes it.

she likes it AFTER you married her? nice one!
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Mupepe on July 25, 2007, 09:21:20 PM
:-X

man, despite my jokes, i don't get the anal fixation so many folks have. wtf!
dunno.  i like tossing a girls salad and fingering her butthole and doing them in the butt.

You're not gay, nor are you bi, you're just awesome in bed, like me.

I'd never force this on a girl who didn't enjoy it, though. Fortunately, the wife likes it.
that's a keeper for sure.  I always try to get a girl to at least try it, if it's not her thing, then whatever, but she needs to at least try!
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Mr. Gundam on July 25, 2007, 09:21:36 PM
It might be the hispanic thing. I watch Univision with the sound off sometimes and it's all these bitches looking like Latina Naomis, pre-tweek

I'd never force this on a girl who didn't enjoy it, though. Fortunately, the wife likes it.

she likes it AFTER you married her? nice one!

She liked it before we got married, and still likes it a year after getting married.

We don't do it very often, though. It's not a regular occurrence in the bedroom.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 09:22:29 PM
 :-X

i cannot imagine getting excited about poking the dooky tunnel. the fuck!
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Mupepe on July 25, 2007, 09:24:40 PM
God it feels so good.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Mupepe on July 25, 2007, 09:25:09 PM
I once had a girl blow me 20 minutes after I gave it to her in the pooper
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 25, 2007, 09:26:38 PM
We don't do it very often, though. It's not a regular occurrence in the bedroom.


that's cool, a little spice is groovy; no matter what pr0n tries to tell us, you really CAN'T just ram it in a chicks butt and expect them to find the experience wonderful.

but like our bald-headed techno vegan Moby once said, "anal sex is a beautiful thing to ease into" and word. five hours later you're all like AHHH BLISS and it's worth it.

:-X

i cannot imagine getting excited about poking the dooky tunnel. the fuck!


we're not talking post-shit, Drinky, we're talking just out of the shower on some salad-tossing technique
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 09:36:55 PM
y'all must have little dicks! looks painful for both the dude and the girl, plus WHY IS THE VAG SO BORING

i srsly just don't see the appeal. what *is* the point? some creepy domination/submission urge? scat fetishism?
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 25, 2007, 09:45:38 PM
y'all must have little dicks!

oh that's a sly dis

looks painful for both the dude and the girl, plus WHY IS THE VAG SO BORING

it's not! but guess what? more nerve endings there.

as a dude, you probably ain't hearing the appeal of the prostate being manipulated, are you? no ruzghey.

i srsly just don't see the appeal. what *is* the point? some creepy domination/submission urge? scat fetishism?


god it's like Nintendo with you - if you don't enjoy it, why should anyone else?
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 09:48:49 PM
likewise, chicks don't have prostates -- are you the one getting pegged, my mellow? why do you wanna stick it in the girl's poopenschaft?

but i don't care that you enjoy it, i'm just curious why. REAL TALK. i think it's a psychosexual thing; a sublimated domination urge to make the woman do something degraded and uncomfortable. besides, no matter how clean, it's still the POOPHOLE. i really, really, REALLY dislike shit. it's an OCD swede thang!

just sayin'! poop is gross!  :-X  :-X  :-X
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Phoenix Dark on July 25, 2007, 09:52:54 PM
I'm more concerned about the smell, not to mention the possible issue of fecal matter being on your condom/penis :-X
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 25, 2007, 09:53:11 PM
but i don't care that you enjoy it, i'm just curious why. REAL TALK.

more nerve endings there.

"anal sex is a beautiful thing to ease into"

..you're all like AHHH BLISS and it's worth it.

I don't give a shit about making women feel pain or doing shit that they don't enjoy, so it's not that - and I've not trying to give EVERY chick I fuck an ass rodgering.

But Doug, you've never put your pinkie into your wifes' ass when you're giving it to her doggie? Do you guys DO IT doggie? You're always on top, aren't you.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 09:58:35 PM
no sir, we tend to mix up the positions in a pretty even distribution. i'll spare the forum the details since rl friends post here, but if i ever felt the urge to put a pinky in her winky stinky, i'd be signing divorce papers. we're of a like mind on that issue: the ass is a no fly zone.

besides, again, why do you need to hit the ass when doing it doggie style? is it cuz little corny can't, uh, y'know, reach....WHAT COME ON THAT DIS IS A GIMME
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 25, 2007, 10:03:23 PM
no sir, we tend to mix up the positions in a pretty even distribution. i'll spare the forum the details since rl friends post here, but if i ever felt the urge to put a pinky in her winky stinky, i'd be signing divorce papers. we're of a like mind on that issue: the ass is a no fly zone.

aw that's cute, spare yr real life friends any details of your bootknocking adventures

but ok, if wifey has already explicitly confirmed that she does not want anything breeching her asshole, then that's cool and yeah. i hope you DO mix up the positions because i get the feeling you make fun of her if she suggests anything too... Nintendo-y and whatever, the DS is my favorite position

besides, again, why do you need to hit the ass when doing it doggie style? is it cuz little corny can't, uh, y'know, reach....WHAT COME ON THAT DIS IS A GIMME

i don't NEED to. i haven't put my dick in anyones' ass in like, what, seven, eight years?

and wait WHAT
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 10:07:01 PM
hey, both maf and tvc have met my wife, and i'm sure she wouldn't appreciate the, er, intimate details of our relationship shared on TEH INTARWEBS. besides, do YOU really want the image of your friends and coworkers slappin' dat ay-ss or ridin' cowgirl? no THANK YOU.

and i'm just sayin', if you move yer dick down an inch or two from the brown balloon knot when poundin' the mound, there's a vag open and waiting. it's not much more of a reach UNLESS

well

:hurr
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 25, 2007, 10:09:21 PM
hey, both maf and tvc have met my wife, and i'm sure she wouldn't appreciate the, er, intimate details of our relationship shared on TEH INTARWEBS. besides, do YOU really want the image of your friends and coworkers slappin' dat ay-ss or ridin' cowgirl? no THANK YOU.

you're right.

but does she ride you cowgirl? reverse cowgirl?? :hyper


and i'm just sayin', if you move yer dick down an inch or two from the brown balloon knot when poundin' the mound, there's a vag open and waiting. it's not much more of a reach UNLESS

well

:hurr

unless what? don't be coy, Drinky - it infuriates me.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 10:12:24 PM
unless it is too small to adequately penetrate from that angle! :'( jesus, you ruined the dis. i'm gonna go play psp.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 25, 2007, 10:17:07 PM
unless it is too small to adequately penetrate from that angle!


a couple of things:

Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 10:21:55 PM
a couple of things

a) it was a joke

b) doggy style presents the g-spot more effectively than some other positions, so while we aren't talkin' a need for ten inches of monster dickin', it DOES help to pack more than oh, say, a ruzbeh-grade three-incher (or not have a g-style jelly belly)

y'know, i'll bet it's KILLING g not to post in this thread
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Madrun Badrun on July 25, 2007, 10:41:12 PM
isn't drinky's wife german? 
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 10:41:55 PM
she's half kraut, yeah
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 25, 2007, 10:48:51 PM
she's half kraut, yeah


and she's not into anal? you better get her lineage checked, duder
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: tiesto on July 25, 2007, 11:03:32 PM
My friend won't shut up about eating 2-hole, saying its the greatest thing in the world, but that doesn't appeal to me in the slightest... I would definitely do anal, but the girl has to be really clean up there... and even if she is clean, there's no way I'm eating 2-hole.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mupepe on July 25, 2007, 11:09:58 PM
I've got a really tiny dick which is why it's probably easier for me to convince girls to try it.  and yeah, this is all after they take a nice shower and are clean.  i can see why it's not some peoples thing.  but meh.

and it just feels different.  i love vag, but i also love me some ass.  just something different.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mupepe on July 25, 2007, 11:10:33 PM
btw, nothing is better than fucking a girl in the ass while she's on her tummy and pulling her hair while saying "you like that, don't you fucking little slut?"
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Madrun Badrun on July 25, 2007, 11:12:00 PM
she's half kraut, yeah


and she's not into anal? you better get her lineage checked, duder

Drinky probably just doesn't want his rl friends to know they throw German poo parties bimonthly. 
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Cyanista on July 25, 2007, 11:45:08 PM
Wow!  You guys know a lot about what women like.  :lol
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 11:47:06 PM
i don't think we're discussing what WOMEN like here, hun
Title: Re: Gross Confessions
Post by: Cyanista on July 25, 2007, 11:51:42 PM


b) doggy style presents the g-spot more effectively than some other positions, so while we aren't talkin' a need for ten inches of monster dickin', it DOES help to pack more than oh, say, a ruzbeh-grade three-incher (or not have a g-style jelly belly)


Quote
a couple of things:


    * how do you "adequately penetrate" a vagina? the clit is the main focal point of enjoyment in the female species and unless you enjoy having your cervix banged - which some women do, and some women don't - it really doesn't matter HOW big your dick is

Oh, you weren't?   ::)

You don't really think I was replying to Mupepe's side of this discussion, did you?  I ignore the overly gross.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mupepe on July 25, 2007, 11:53:04 PM
i didn't discuss what women like.  i'm cool because i don't try to cover up my selfishness by saying "she likes it more!"
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 11:53:43 PM
bottom quote weren't mine! as for the top quote, experience and partner input -- pun intended -- bears it out!
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Cyanista on July 25, 2007, 11:56:51 PM
You said "we" weren't talking about what women want, I was just pointing out that wasn't accurate.

I wasn't arguing with your actual statements.  I have no idea what your personal freak likes, but more power to the both of you.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 25, 2007, 11:58:57 PM
the general THRUST of this discussion has very little to do with what women want, then!
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Cyanista on July 26, 2007, 12:01:19 AM
This is a horrible thread.

IGNORE ME
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Phoenix Dark on July 26, 2007, 12:01:35 AM
Seems rather...odd to "not care" whether she's experiencing pain. Seems like pain would turn lots of chicks off, especially if the smelly dude on top didn't give a shit. :-\
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 12:03:49 AM
Wow!  You guys know a lot about what women like.  :lol


I want to answer this but

This is a horrible thread.

IGNORE ME

What the fuck, this is your new retort for everything? Do we have to go to the new improved OA to talk frankly with you or what?
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: bagofeyes on July 26, 2007, 12:05:45 AM
Let's all ignore her
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 12:06:35 AM
it's a venture bros reference, corny. KAY
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 12:07:43 AM
it's a venture bros reference, corny. KAY

what is? further down the nerd hierarchy I go
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 12:10:55 AM
nothing a crotchless fursuit and the last ten years of x-men comics can't fix
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 12:12:12 AM
tell me motherfucker or i'll forever regret i asked
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Cyanista on July 26, 2007, 12:14:39 AM
Ok, so like...there's this 10-foot tall alien with an incredibly strident voice that comes to earth to observe and judge our species.  It ends up with the venture family, following them around and butting into their conversations.  Then when they respond it yells IGNORE ME!

Someone linked the youtube of it not long ago, blah blah.


GO TEAM VENTURE
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 12:15:28 AM
venture bros is an adult swim cartoon show that satirizes johnny quest and other classic 60s cartoon adventure series. on one episode, an alien robot comes to earth to judge humankind fit for survival. frequently, said robot would lapse into non-sequitur, and then bellow IGNORE ME as punctuation to his rambling.

:'( is the humor completely explicated out of her little meme, now? WILL YOU EVER BE SATISFIED
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: bagofeyes on July 26, 2007, 12:15:52 AM
neeeerrrrrdsss
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 12:16:00 AM
great. so uh is your constant refrain of "IGNORE ME" supposed to mean that us plebes should shut the fuck up or...?

/doesn't get it, LOL nerds
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Phoenix Dark on July 26, 2007, 12:16:26 AM
Even I've seen that show


spoiler (click to show/hide)
Once :(
[close]
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Cyanista on July 26, 2007, 12:18:16 AM
great. so uh is your constant refrain of "IGNORE ME" supposed to mean that us plebes should shut the fuck up or...?



It's supposed to be funny.  Like I butt my nose in and flaunt my opinion everywhere then demand you carry on as if I'm not even here.

It's a joke.   :-\
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 12:19:38 AM
no, corny. in fact, it suggests that we will continue our merry feuding without her largely alien observations.

let us get back to WHY YOU CRAVE THE POOPERHOLE, i am not satisfied with your answers
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mupepe on July 26, 2007, 12:20:51 AM
i like when i'm licking a girls ass and she's grinding on my face.  makes me feel good and dirty at the same time.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 12:21:41 AM
bah I don't mean to use my thread killing powas for evil

i just wanted to discuss buttsex

like Garnet, my mouth burns, but with chalula sauce and internet

let us get back to WHY YOU CRAVE THE POOPERHOLE, i am not satisfied with your answers

i really don't crave it! i much prefer a good game of hawaiian muscle fucking.

Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 12:22:17 AM
yes, mupepe, but your status as the local pervasaurus rex was never in question.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Phoenix Dark on July 26, 2007, 12:22:45 AM
i like when i'm licking a girls ass and she's grinding on my face.  makes me feel good and dirty at the same time.

Do you...taste anything while you do this? I just can't imagine being in someone's ass and not smelling/tasting something. Someone might say "well what does that say about YOUR ass" but hey, as Jules Winnfield would say the anus is a filthy animal
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 12:23:46 AM
can Phoenix Dork please be removed from this thread? this isn't like the omg virgins are like what's up thread.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mupepe on July 26, 2007, 12:27:17 AM
i like when i'm licking a girls ass and she's grinding on my face.  makes me feel good and dirty at the same time.

Do you...taste anything while you do this? I just can't imagine being in someone's ass and not smelling/tasting something. Someone might say "well what does that say about YOUR ass" but hey, as Jules Winnfield would say the anus is a filthy animal
let me put it this way, if you've tasted a girls pussy, you've most likely tasted her ass too.  they're so close together and between walking, sweet and general chode area odor and excrement, it tastes pretty much the same.  and if i'm eating her ass, my nose is a good bit away, it's either shoved deep in her pussy or her upper crack.  keep in mind, i wouldn't do this if a girl has been out of the shower more than a few minutes.  so it smells like general sex sweat.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mandark on July 26, 2007, 12:44:39 AM
Details magazine story on the etiquette of anal sex. (http://men.style.com/details/blogs/details/alternative_orifices/index.html)

Most of the guys quoted in the article seem to care more about getting the chick to do it than the act itself.  I think everyone's so used to the Guy Badgers Chick Until She Puts Out narrative, that if a girl doesn't do something she had to be convinced to do, you haven't really accomplished anything.

Not to say that anal can't be lots of fun for guys and gals, but there's a big social/status aspect to it.  I don't think the "it feels better" logic explains the big role it plays in porn, ferinstance.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mandark on July 26, 2007, 12:51:52 AM
Oh, and

[youtube=425,350]ds6-o4gomRc[/youtube]
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 12:54:09 AM
yeah, that article pretty much confirmed what i figured: that most dudes want to do chicks in the ass because it inflates their sense of masculine dominance, which likewise suggests gross insecurity.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Cyanista on July 26, 2007, 12:54:59 AM
yeah, that article pretty much confirmed what i figured: that most dudes want to do chicks in the ass because it inflates their sense of masculine dominance, which likewise suggests gross insecurity.

Bingo.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mandark on July 26, 2007, 01:03:29 AM
Used to be the same phenomenon with oral sex, I think.  But now it's widely accepted, so where's the fun in that?  Maybe anal will eventually become so widespread that frat boys need to find a new way for their girls to pledge sexual fealty.

Gagging maybe?
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Junpei the Tracer! on July 26, 2007, 01:03:54 AM
Oh, and

[youtube=425,350]ds6-o4gomRc[/youtube]

lol why did he have to die?
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: xnikki118x on July 26, 2007, 01:50:20 AM
yeah, that article pretty much confirmed what i figured: that most dudes want to do chicks in the ass because it inflates their sense of masculine dominance, which likewise suggests gross insecurity.

Bingo!



Seems rather...odd to "not care" whether she's experiencing pain. Seems like pain would turn lots of chicks off, especially if the smelly dude on top didn't give a shit. :-\

Bingo again!
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Yeti on July 26, 2007, 02:19:44 AM
I would do anal if the girl wanted to, but it definitely wouldn't be my first choice. Or my second. I guess it is about on par with tittyfucking, where it might be a fun novelty but I can't really expect it being all that pleasurable.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: drohne on July 26, 2007, 02:23:19 AM
Quote from: Mandark
Not to say that anal can't be lots of fun for guys and gals, but there's a big social/status aspect to it.  I don't think the "it feels better" logic explains the big role it plays in porn, ferinstance.

martin amis wrote an article about the porn industry several years ago -- you can probably find it online. he asked some producer or director about the primacy of anal sex in porn, and received the memorable response: 'pussy is bullshit.' meaning that a woman's reaction to vaginal penetration on camera is going to be fake -- and probably unconvincing. her reaction to a huge cock in her ass is on some level real.

entertaining article too.

been watching season 1 of the wire, btw. and liking it a lot. might post something about it later
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: drohne on July 26, 2007, 02:23:49 AM
double anal
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Cyanista on July 26, 2007, 02:25:35 AM
What do porn stars have to do with actual sex?
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 02:26:46 AM
we're talking about what excites dudes; specifically, why anal sex is such a big thing for many of them. porn is a very, very good indicator of that.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: bagofeyes on July 26, 2007, 02:28:39 AM
What about bukkake?
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: drohne on July 26, 2007, 02:32:04 AM
i was just talking about porn. all i know about this...'actual sex' is what i've been told in various enlightening question and answer topics from the gaf ot forum. those guys are experts
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Madrun Badrun on July 26, 2007, 02:32:53 AM
What do porn stars have to do with actual sex?

hey some of only have porn to go on!   ...:'(
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mr. Gundam on July 26, 2007, 02:46:01 AM
yeah, that article pretty much confirmed what i figured: that most dudes want to do chicks in the ass because it inflates their sense of masculine dominance, which likewise suggests gross insecurity.

The first time I had anal sex, the girl suggested it. The thought never crossed my mind, and I wouldn't do it if they weren't enjoying it.

I'm not into it because it's "exciting" or because it's rooted in my having power over my wife. We both like it, and only do it when we both are in the mood for it, which means it happens three or four times a year.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 02:48:41 AM
girls can have submission issues, too, just as dudes can have dominance ones. submission gets some chicks off, but again, it usually indicates seriously sublimated personal problems.

so why do you like it? why is it more exciting than vaginal intercourse? "variety" really isn't a justifiable answer for such a silly distinction. at least with oral sex, there's a pretty broad range of technique.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mr. Gundam on July 26, 2007, 02:53:10 AM
so why do you like it? why is it more exciting than vaginal intercourse? "variety" really isn't a justifiable answer for such a silly distinction. at least with oral sex, there's a pretty broad range of technique.

I never said it was "more exciting" than vaginal intercourse, it's just different. It's a completely different sensation, both for me and the girl.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 02:54:01 AM
i think i got a better theory. ;)
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mandark on July 26, 2007, 03:14:51 AM
martin amis wrote an article about the porn industry several years ago -- you can probably find it online. he asked some producer or director about the primacy of anal sex in porn, and received the memorable response: 'pussy is bullshit.' meaning that a woman's reaction to vaginal penetration on camera is going to be fake -- and probably unconvincing. her reaction to a huge cock in her ass is on some level real.

Just read the article.  Fun stuff.

A lot of porn conventions seem to have resulted from really mundane, practical concerns.  The cumshot is proof that the sex isn't faked, blowjobs are the only way to get closeups of a star's face without losing the action, etc.

And since people are pretty reticent about sex, porn gets to set the agenda to a degree.  I mean, if anal weren't the new black, how many people would it even occur to?  Even bonobos don't do anal.  Bonobos!
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: bagofeyes on July 26, 2007, 03:19:33 AM
And since people are pretty reticent about sex, porn gets to set the agenda to a degree.  I mean, if anal weren't the new black, how many people would it even occur to?  Even bonobos don't do anal.  Bonobos!

There are always people looking for a new place to put their dicks
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: drohne on July 26, 2007, 03:54:48 AM
i'm usually pretty poop averse, but if i go exploring a girl's aft corridor, it's because it's dirty and it's different, and because sex like anything else is dulled by routine. maybe sex more than anything else -- sometimes you have to shock yourself. i would imagine that girls like it for similar reasons. maybe that doesn't lend itself to an indignant feminist interpretation. or what am i saying: everything lends itself to an indignant feminist interpretation
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: aoi tsuki on July 26, 2007, 06:42:51 AM
Most of the guys in that article are douchebags, and the article itself does a good job at painting guys that like anal with the same brush.

i've admitted to liking anal because of the taboo initially, but it just feels different. It hasn't replaced vag sex for me, but at the same time i wouldn't want to be in a relationship where it was off the table. i think under the right circumstances, when both of you are relaxed, there's plenty of lube, and you take at her pace, it's really enjoyable.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: bud on July 26, 2007, 08:32:25 AM
aoi, who's the girl in your avatar?
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: aoi tsuki on July 26, 2007, 08:56:37 AM
Kinky Zee
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 10:47:31 AM
I like how the thinkers of EB have come to the conclusion that if you have anal sex, you're a filthy deviant who is only doing it to degrade their partner.

 ::)

Oh and if you have anal sex you're a poor too, probably
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 10:51:25 AM
nah, drohne articulated a pretty fair if slightly disingenuous reason, although i imagine some of the perverts WILL jump on it as a better rationalization. i just can't fathom *why* in one's pursuit of alternative sensation that one would choose the place poop comes out -- and consistently -- but hey, i'm the prude here!
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mupepe on July 26, 2007, 10:53:30 AM
who doesn't like being dirty while they fuck?  the idea that poop comes out of there and that i shouldn't be in there just makes it that much better.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: aoi tsuki on July 26, 2007, 11:33:04 AM
nah, drohne articulated a pretty fair if slightly disingenuous reason, although i imagine some of the perverts WILL jump on it as a better rationalization. i just can't fathom *why* in one's pursuit of alternative sensation that one would choose the place poop comes out -- and consistently -- but hey, i'm the prude here!
And piss comes out of the vag. Rationalize vaginal sex if you like.

But whatever. Some men would fuck anything. If a woman had a hole that spewed molten NES cartridges, i'd get her in a shower, lube it up, and fuck it, hotness permitting.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: bud on July 26, 2007, 11:42:35 AM
 :lol
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 11:43:50 AM
People vomit with their mouths! I ain't putting my poke in that!

Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Tauntaun on July 26, 2007, 11:49:35 AM
nah, drohne articulated a pretty fair if slightly disingenuous reason, although i imagine some of the perverts WILL jump on it as a better rationalization. i just can't fathom *why* in one's pursuit of alternative sensation that one would choose the place poop comes out -- and consistently -- but hey, i'm the prude here!
And piss comes out of the vag. Rationalize vaginal sex if you like.

But whatever. Some men would fuck anything. If a woman had a hole that spewed molten NES cartridges, i'd get her in a shower, lube it up, and fuck it, hotness permitting.

I heard you have to blow in them to get them to work sometimes.  :-*
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 12:39:04 PM
piss doesn't come out of the vag, it comes out of the urethra which while adjacent isn't actually the same hole. jesus, people! VIRGINS AMONG US. plus the purpose of the anus is POOPING, PERIOD.

i still think it boils down to that dudes get their macho up when a chick won't give them access to the stinky winky -- they feel they gotta have it in order to make sure nothing is "off the table" as it were, especially if a previous fling let 'em drive the hershey highway. again, i ain't never gonna tell people what the can or can't do in the sack if all parties are consenting, but it's funny how most of you try to paint the act in some sort of quasi-altruistic light or aver the larger question of masculine hang-ups. just sayin' is all! continue to enjoy poking the pooper!
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 12:41:53 PM
i still think it boils down to that dudes get their macho up when a chick won't give them access to the stinky winky -- they feel they gotta have it in order to make sure nothing is "off the table" as it were, especially if a previous fling let 'em drive the hershey highway.

so no matter who tells you differently, you're going to continue assuming that it's a "macho" thing or whatever.

again, i ain't never gonna tell people what the can or can't do in the sack if all parties are consenting, but it's funny how most of you try to paint the act in some sort of quasi-altruistic light or aver the larger question of masculine hang-ups. just sayin' is all! continue to enjoy poking the pooper!

who are you referring to when you say "most of you"?

i still say you only fuck with you on top, but i'm going to also add that you have a sheet with a hole in it between you.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 12:45:24 PM
you duders did a poor job 'splaining yourselves. hey, you don't need my approval, right?

i say "most of you" because there's a spectrum of intellectual honesty i'm too lazy to bookend, and it's safe to assume that only a certain large percentage of the dooky dunkers here are disingenuous about their need.

also, jesus says sex is for procreation only, and any pleasure i recieve from it is SINFUL. :punch
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 12:51:06 PM
you duders did a poor job 'splaining yourselves. hey, you don't need my approval, right?

no i don't need your approval but how the fuck did we do a poor job of explaining ourselves? if anything, you're the one with the "ew poo comes from there" argument; the fucking kid from "You Me and Everyone We Know" had a more adult way of looking at things than you do!

i say "most of you" because there's a spectrum of intellectual honesty i'm too lazy to bookend, and it's safe to assume that only a certain large percentage of the dooky dunkers here are disingenuous about their need.

oh, great! assumptions!

i don't even know why i bother to have any type of serious, heart-felt responses to anything anyone says because it's just met with eyerolling and derision.

Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 01:02:47 PM
it's ANAL SEX. you aren't sharing a real moment; you're discussing why you like to plant in the manure patch, senor. it lends itself to snarky, jokey talk -- sorry! i can't feel any gravitas when it comes to talking about anal sex!

now, if you wanna talk about how uncle bubba touched you in the shameful place, i'll put on my serious face and nod with all the internet pathos i can muster.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 01:06:20 PM
eh fuck it. let's make love, professor prole. unf unf unf.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 01:08:00 PM
:o :o :o


...

:hump

...

fuck, you just HAD to go anal :-\
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Cyanista on July 26, 2007, 01:33:09 PM
 :lol
Anal sex is fine.  Just not in my anal.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 01:38:39 PM
And that's cool, but all the cries of "bingo!" made us filthy ass-shaggers feel all bad.

Well, just me. Distantmantra probably gave it to wifey in the choco starfish just to spite all y'all
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Tauntaun on July 26, 2007, 01:39:08 PM
:lol
Anal sex is fine.  Just not in my anal.

(http://i144.photobucket.com/albums/r169/jmt3336/ShoNuffFullSize.jpg)

 :lol  It works with like, everything you post.  :heart
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Cyanista on July 26, 2007, 01:50:02 PM
Oh, don't get me wrong.  I still think Drinky has the right of it...mostly.  Some guys aren't smart enough to figure out the whole ego dom/submissive thing, so I have to assume they are just on some "Durrr...I saw this in a porno and my sister Geraldine won' let me do it!  MUST BE GOOD STUFF" tip. 

I guess there's probably also the contingent of men with dicks too small to get good sensation in some vagina? 

All I know is it takes all kinds..but if you're the kind that is really into anal, stay away from me.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 01:54:49 PM
Oh, don't get me wrong.  I still think Drinky has the right of it...mostly.  Some guys aren't smart enough to figure out the whole ego dom/submissive thing, so I have to assume they are just on some "Durrr...I saw this in a porno and my sister Geraldine won' let me do it!  MUST BE GOOD STUFF" tip. 

Everyone and their assumptions.

I guess there's probably also the contingent of men with dicks too small to get good sensation in some vagina? 

Oh of course, small dicked men are into anal! I'm going to write a strongly worded letter to Shane Diesel and tell him that he's fucking it up for the rest of us.

And then there's the whole [CENSORED] thing too.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 02:26:06 PM
hey, i don't CARE that other folks actually DO anal -- consenting adults, yadda yadda. but if i'm gonna DISCUSS it, i'll lay my cards on the table. i mean, seriously, who expected *me* -- the foremost snot in the larger GAF/EB/OA community -- to just nod and go "nice, nice, i see, excellent, thanks for sharing, <smiley face> <smiley face>"
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 02:29:28 PM
It just seemed like you were laying your cards on the table in that absolute, "Prole's-Way-or-the-Highway" style you favor so.

Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mr. Gundam on July 26, 2007, 02:30:44 PM
And that's cool, but all the cries of "bingo!" made us filthy ass-shaggers feel all bad.

Well, just me. Distantmantra probably gave it to wifey in the choco starfish just to spite all y'all

Hah! Nope, I was up until 3am finishing Deathly Hallows while she was sleeping soundly.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Van Cruncheon on July 26, 2007, 02:31:57 PM
please. i appreciate that you take me THAT seriously -- honestly, i do -- but JESUS i am just another shitheel on an internet filled with them. i have opinions. i see no reason to decorate them with nicety. you have the option of rolling your eyes without hurting my feelings.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Cyanista on July 26, 2007, 02:34:46 PM
I have no idea who Shane Diesel is, but any sensible adult realizes the cons of anal sex overwhelmingly outweigh the pros. 

Bam!  Declarative statement.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 02:36:41 PM
I have no idea who Shane Diesel is, but any sensible adult realizes the cons of anal sex overwhelmingly outweigh the pros. 


What about Distantmantra's wife? Sorry to keep using her as an example, Distrantmantra.

Is she misled? Does she not really enjoy it?
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Cyanista on July 26, 2007, 02:39:05 PM
Maybe she's not sensible?  It was a fucking joke, don't make me call up my old CX debate partner.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 02:39:50 PM
I'm just glad you didn't throw "IGNORE ME!" somewhere in there.

Maybe she's not sensible? 

Poor Mrs. Distantmantra. Don't ever let these two meet.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Tauntaun on July 26, 2007, 02:44:23 PM
I'm just glad you didn't throw "IGNORE ME!" somewhere in there.

Maybe she's not sensible? 

Poor Mrs. Distantmantra. Don't ever let these two meet.

Mrs. Distantmantra: Hi I'm Distantmantra's wife.

Cyanista: BIIIIIITCH why you lettin that walking penis violate your cornhole?   :maf
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mupepe on July 26, 2007, 02:46:04 PM
what the fuck has this turned into?  seriously.

i like fucking a girl in the ass.  i don't care why i like it.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 02:53:44 PM
what the fuck has this turned into?  seriously.

it's one of those rare threads on EB where Prof. Prole exerts his superiority over us filthy plebes.

i like fucking a girl in the ass.  i don't care why i like it.

But do you care if they like it?
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mupepe on July 26, 2007, 02:54:52 PM
if she didn't like it, she wouldn't be letting me do it.  I don't give a shit why she likes it either.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 02:56:10 PM
if she didn't like it, she wouldn't be letting me do it.

not according to the experts in this thread!

I don't give a shit why she likes it either.

WORD SON
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mupepe on July 26, 2007, 03:04:05 PM
I don't get why you have to overanalyze this type of stuff.  If I know why I like to pull a girls hair and spank/be spanked, is it going to make it feel better?  If it doesn't, why does it matter?
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 03:06:36 PM
WORD SON! I AIN'T MAD AT CHA
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Cyanista on July 26, 2007, 03:08:24 PM
I'm just glad you didn't throw "IGNORE ME!" somewhere in there.

Maybe she's not sensible? 

Poor Mrs. Distantmantra. Don't ever let these two meet.

Mrs. Distantmantra: Hi I'm Distantmantra's wife.

Cyanista: BIIIIIITCH why you lettin that walking penis violate your cornhole?   :maf

Awesome.  Corny has started me an e-beef with some uninvolved third party.  ::)
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 03:10:24 PM
:rofl
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Yeti on July 26, 2007, 04:26:23 PM
What if the phallus was in the other butt? How many of you who like anal sex would let a woman put on a strap on and have anal with you?
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Tauntaun on July 26, 2007, 04:28:59 PM
Awesome.  Corny has started me an e-beef with some uninvolved third party.  ::)

It's what's for dinner!

(http://www.organicpacificgourmet.com/organic_beef.jpg)

spoiler (click to show/hide)
that post was a joke btw  :-*
[close]
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Tauntaun on July 26, 2007, 04:30:09 PM
What if the phallus was in the other butt? How many of you who like anal sex would let a woman put on a strap on and have anal with you?

there's a word for that, but here's 1,000

 :supergay
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Saint Cornelius on July 26, 2007, 04:31:14 PM
What if the phallus was in the other butt? How many of you who like anal sex would let a woman put on a strap on and have anal with you?


This reminds me of an episode of Weeds...

...but to answer your question, what's fair is fair I suppose.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: brawndolicious on July 26, 2007, 05:20:18 PM
I think in Yeti's case, the male/female dominance/submission thing would be more likely.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mupepe on July 26, 2007, 05:32:23 PM
What if the phallus was in the other butt? How many of you who like anal sex would let a woman put on a strap on and have anal with you?
This is dumb.  She could just as easily say no as I can. 

BTW, I tried a finger in my butt once.  Not for me.
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Madrun Badrun on July 26, 2007, 05:57:15 PM
 :o  did not need to know! 
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Yeti on July 26, 2007, 06:06:34 PM
What if the phallus was in the other butt? How many of you who like anal sex would let a woman put on a strap on and have anal with you?
This is dumb.  She could just as easily say no as I can. 

BTW, I tried a finger in my butt once.  Not for me.

How is that dumb? What's good for the goose is good for the gander.  :P
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mupepe on July 26, 2007, 06:22:14 PM
What if the phallus was in the other butt? How many of you who like anal sex would let a woman put on a strap on and have anal with you?
This is dumb.  She could just as easily say no as I can. 

BTW, I tried a finger in my butt once.  Not for me.

How is that dumb? What's good for the goose is good for the gander.  :P
You ever tried anything in your butt? ;)
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Yeti on July 26, 2007, 09:48:53 PM
Are you offering?  :-*
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: demi on July 26, 2007, 09:50:34 PM
Are you offering?  :-*

UH I AM
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Mupepe on July 26, 2007, 10:20:15 PM
Are you offering?  :-*
Yes
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Tauntaun on July 26, 2007, 11:18:42 PM
Are you offering?  :-*

UH I AM
Are you offering?  :-*
Yes


gghhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: bagofeyes on July 26, 2007, 11:22:24 PM
this thread/forum is gay
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: Tauntaun on July 26, 2007, 11:23:25 PM
this thread/forum is gay

 :-*
Title: Re: Gross Confessions and Backdoor Blues
Post by: FatalT on July 26, 2007, 11:39:43 PM
this thread/forum is gay

NOM NOM NOM