THE BORE

General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: Howard Alan Treesong on February 05, 2008, 02:36:54 AM

Title: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: Howard Alan Treesong on February 05, 2008, 02:36:54 AM: Me: Let's meet for coffee!
Her: Sure! Where?
Me: . o O (This is my big chance to impress her! I'll find an awesome, quirky independent coffee house and impress her with my worldly ways!)
Me: *Googles*

(http://i32.tinypic.com/20tnubo.jpg)

Me: :gloomy
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: The Fake Shemp on February 05, 2008, 02:37:20 AM: CRAB COOKER!
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: demi on February 05, 2008, 02:38:35 AM: Another vote for Starbucks
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: The Fake Shemp on February 05, 2008, 02:39:20 AM: Tell her to meet you at the coffee shop... in your pants. Your bold move will be rewarded with hot, animal sex.
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: demi on February 05, 2008, 02:40:22 AM: And coffee
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: The Fake Shemp on February 05, 2008, 02:41:06 AM: Yes, you better have coffee or else that might backfire.
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: FatalT on February 05, 2008, 02:43:12 AM: Quote from: Willco on February 05, 2008, 02:41:06 AM
Yes, you better have coffee or else that might backfire.

Just not in your pants. That'd be scalding hot.
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: CajoleJuice on February 05, 2008, 02:43:19 AM: "She invited me up. Coffee's not coffee, coffee is sex."
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: Howard Alan Treesong on February 05, 2008, 02:46:28 AM: "Instead of coffee, why don't we go get ourselves some crabs?"
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: The Fake Shemp on February 05, 2008, 02:46:52 AM: This is getting too convoluted.

Just invite her to a wrap party, conveniently hosted in a dark alley. When she arrives and asks where the wrap party is, tell her that she is confused, because you said rape party. Then five big, black men will jump from the shadows as you pin her down and deflower her.

Years from now, after several thousands of dollars spent on therapy, you'll both look back on the experience and laugh.
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: FatalT on February 05, 2008, 02:47:12 AM: Quote from: Synthesizer Patel on February 05, 2008, 02:46:28 AM
"Instead of coffee, why don't we go get ourselves some crabs?"

Good call!
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: TVC15 on February 05, 2008, 02:59:58 AM: Wow, that is even worse than Seattle. We have a similar concentration of Starbucks, but at least have lots of non-Starbucks (or Starbucks-owned) cafes, too.
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: T-Short on February 05, 2008, 08:42:16 AM: (http://www.crabcooker.com/crabcooker.jpg)
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: Cormacaroni on February 05, 2008, 09:18:07 AM: Why would anyone take the time to write a review of a Starbucks.
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: Eric P on February 05, 2008, 09:36:38 AM: Quote from: Cormacaroni on February 05, 2008, 09:18:07 AM
Why would anyone take the time to write a review of a Starbucks.

to save them from having to review every starbucks
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: Rman on February 05, 2008, 09:39:38 AM: I can't stand the homogenization of the business landscape here in the states. Manhattan, full of diverse, independent businesses is also being assaulted by chains. I can't stand them.
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: Tauntaun on February 05, 2008, 10:48:10 AM: Quote from: Synthesizer Patel on February 05, 2008, 02:36:54 AM
Me: . o O (This is my big chance to impress her! I'll find an awesome, quirky independent coffee house and impress her with my worldly ways!)

This is why you failed, JUST BE YOURSELF! :maf
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: T-Short on February 05, 2008, 10:52:15 AM: (http://www.crabcooker.com/fishjumping.gif)
Title: Re: This is why we can't have nice dates anymore
Post by: Tauntaun on February 05, 2008, 10:53:18 AM: Quote from: Hyoushi on February 05, 2008, 10:52:15 AM
(http://www.crabcooker.com/fishjumping.gif)

lol seafood = vagina /the todd