Everywhere I expected to see a beaner, there was a colored person instead. It was really odd, almost like a Twilight Zone experience.
As part of my crusade to subject my chubby legs to a neverending series of insect bites, my road trip extends to Memphis tomorrow.
Tennessee is doomed!
I'm not opposed to a Kentucky-bore visit, but I would need a place to cash. My next hotel is paid for, and I don't have money for another.
I would suggest Jaybo or Bloodwake. Both have cool stuff. I'm really far out of the way though. I might be able to come that way and visit though.
I got the next four days off too fellas.
Come on willco.
Why don't you be a cool person and come to New York?
Willco is less of an essay and more of a treatise.As part of my crusade to subject my chubby legs to a neverending series of insect bites, my road trip extends to Memphis tomorrow.
Tennessee is doomed!
You better check yourself, essay! :maf
(http://cdn0.knowyourmeme.com/i/7440/original/purple_drank.jpg)
Then I went upstairs to the game room, complete with the monster television, Wii and PlayStation 3. There was a professional foosball table, high-end air hockey table, high-quality basketball hoop mounted to the wall, darts, etc.
Oh. My. God.
Sorry, it was hard to type up why Memphis is so great on my Android, but now that I have some office space, I want you to take a minute to just sit right there and let me tell you how I became the Fresh Prince of town called Memphis.
So, I was unaware of how, um, comfortable my uncle is. I know he has his own company, and flies across the globe and has recently become a published author - but maybe it took the hard fact of driving up to a multi-million dollar estate to have that settle in.
My guest room is ridiculous. I have paid good money to stay in three-and-a-half star hotels this week that pale in comparison. 99% of Americans would be lucky to call it a MASTER BEDROOM. It is beautiful. There is a 40" 1080p HDTV attached to the wall, with a Bose setup and a dock to connect your iPod to.
The bathroom is awesome, with it separated by the tub and toilet in one area and walk-in shower with stone marble floor on the other. In the tub were all kinds of cleaning supplies I couldn't even recognize; so fancy that I only imagine the fanciest of people know how to utilize them (my experience stops at loofahs). The walk-in shower has a commercial dispenser built into the wall for luxury soaps, lotions, etc. Still, I was made a special basket out of customized toiletries, chocolates and the like.
There was a beautiful wooden tray with a wide variety of teas, coffees and biscottis (and a water bottle!), beautiful cups and a high-end coffeemaker. That seemed redundant, because after I had steak and eggs in their kitchen stolen from the set of TOP CHEF (for Cohen, they have this large and awesome refrigerated wine rack built into the island!), I found this awesome machine that will make almost any form of hot, caffeinated beverage based on touch input. It grinds the beans, froths your milk, etc.
I spent most of last night in their pool, goofing around with my well-behaved cousins that are like children from another era (they go to private school, shocker!). The pool house is like a house for some people! Afterwards, I had a classic Italian side dish and grilled surf and turf by the pool side, completed with an amazing imported beer from Belgium (at room temperature!). The backyard is so expansive that he built the children a zipline to get to and from with; it is so cool to see in motion.
Then I went upstairs to the game room, complete with the monster television, Wii and PlayStation 3. There was a professional foosball table, high-end air hockey table, high-quality basketball hoop mounted to the wall, darts, etc.
Today, he is taking me to some minor league baseball game, then a place called Rendezvous for ribs and then maybe party on Beale Street. So yeah, sorry Kentucky, you lose.
The best food I could ever eat? Not a chance. I had that last night, grilled to perfection. Washed down with a delicious beer that you yokels can't even pronounce.
... but hey, I'm sure that possum and raccoon kabobs are a rare delicacy in your area. It's a shame I have more refined tastes. :tophat
Now excuse me, I have to use the private gym and then clean up before I go out on the town this evening. Hopefully, my shirts will be pressed upon my return.
Haha, My grandma's fried chicken is pretty famous, appearing in several cookbooks of Appalachia. And I would walk from here to the Atlantic ocean for her dumplings. Just the best.
so I'm not the only one who thought get him to the greek was average at best?
so I'm not the only one who thought get him to the greek was average at best?That's what it was! I couldn't remember the name. :lol
I think it's funny that you had to actually say that every member of your family reads.Negative stereotypes suck. So does get him to the greek!
T234 knows I kid because I love.
... also, I don't think you will get any pictures of the Willabeast in a pool, and although I'm down about 100 lbs. now, I'm still a little too heavy for the scooter. (I believe the weight limit is 250!).
Bloodwake was so excited at the aspect of getting to meet more folks from The Bore I'm pretty sure he was bouncing around.
(http://img130.imageshack.us/img130/8851/imgp0507.jpg)
No, scary was being on the phone with him while he was practically creaming himself at the thought of sleeping in the same bed that you inhabited only one night before and touching himself while doing so...
Okay, so maybe it wasn't that bad.
Or was it?
But yeah, come visit. It'd be cool, I like meeting internet peoples irl.
I'll run through Ohio
I'll run through Ohio
oh god
I'll run through Ohio
oh god
I did this and WHERE WAS DREW?
High and in IRC, iirc.