THE BORE
General => The Superdeep Borehole => Topic started by: Eel O'Brian on December 25, 2011, 08:52:52 AM
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So my fiance explicitly told her son not to fuck with her Kindle at all, not even touch it. Everything she owns that her kids touch gets destroyed, and I had told her that the Kindle screen was especially fragile. Now, this kid (he is the autistic one) is 15 and loves looking at porn. I mean, unattended and given the opportunity he goes for it every time. He has fucked up the house computer downloading from sketchy sites, loaded up a bunch of shit on his sister's phone, and once charged almost $200 worth of PPV porn on cable.
Well, last night her Mom was over, and she got out the Kindle to show her everything you could do on it. When she flicked the screensaver off, she and her mom got a nice shot of some chick bent over with like a four foot dildo crammed up her asshole. This kid had gone into her room, managed to find the experimental web browser, and went straight for the anal shots. I get a call asking if you can get a virus on a Kindle.
Best part - their father has them today, so she let everyone open all their gifts yesterday, including the PS3. Little dude got himself banned from the PS3 (for an indeterminate amount of time, at least until New Year's day), on Christmas eve, before he ever got the chance to play it, for looking at porn. On a Kindle.
:lol
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lol
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And you STILL want to marry into this family! :lol
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Kid just needs to learn how to hide his porn activities better; cover his tracks
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Modern technology is awesome!
:lol
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Is it a Kindle Fire or a regular Kindle? Because that's awesome, looking at porn on the B&W e-ink screen.
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regular kindle, that's what made it even funnier
i told her she could put a password in it :lol
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Beats playing Samantha Fox strip poker i guess :lol
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Hawt e-ink action
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Remember image quality in the 14.4 days?
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remember clicking a text link to an image, waiting forever for it to load, and hoping it wasn't just a fully clothed shot or a gigantic close-up of a cock?
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Haha the reveal as the imaged loaded top to bottom was always full of drama
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Remember image quality in the 14.4 days?
(http://i.imgur.com/RQp4n.jpg)
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:rofl
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Is it no coincidence that Ruzbeh is autistic and loves shoving objects in his ass? Better keep him away from any vegetables.
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What a total amateur :lol
But banning him from the PS3 because of some porn? Harsh. Mans gotta do what a mans gotta do and all.
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Remember image quality in the 14.4 days?
In those days, I had to revert to text porn stories I subscribed to with a throwaway Hotmail account.
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What a total amateur :lol
But banning him from the PS3 because of some porn? Harsh. Mans gotta do what a mans gotta do and all.
she's hip to teens liking porn, and okay with it, i think this was more about him ignoring what she told him and disrespecting her stuff
i set up a password for her on it, and also blocked access to the PS3 web browser for when he is allowed on that (which, tbh, will probably be tonight, she was laughing about it when i went over there this afternoon)
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Kids today have such an easy time with porn. Shit, I remember back in the day when you were lucky to have ONE PLAYBOY, and sometimes had to resort to mail order lingerie catalogs for fap material.
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no shit, stroke mags got passed around the neighborhood hundreds of times, by the time you got a new mag the women in the old one were probably middle-aged
we were looking at porn rags so old they had ads for 8-tracks and hai karate aftershave
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i Skype sexed and felt all sad and lonely after, in an existential kind of way.
oh well, getting on the plane tomorrow
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Kids today have such an easy time with porn. Shit, I remember back in the day when you were lucky to have ONE PLAYBOY, and sometimes had to resort to mail order lingerie catalogs for fap material.
Yeah, those were the days. The day I found my dad's Playboy and Penthouse collection was the best day of my life.
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found porn :rock
we'd swipe centerfolds out of playboys, then found some Swank magazines which were pretty close to hardcore, iirc. then 1994 hit right as I turned 13 and it was all over. Aol private rooms gifs1, gifs2, gifs3. "OH MAN! This girl looks like she's MY age! ....no tits or pubes at all, why would anyone want this!" :'(
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Kids today have such an easy time with porn. Shit, I remember back in the day when you were lucky to have ONE PLAYBOY, and sometimes had to resort to mail order lingerie catalogs for fap material.
Yeah, those were the days. The day I found my dad's Playboy and Penthouse collection was the best day of my life.
And it never occured to you that your dad probably spanked one to those same magazines. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
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yee yee
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there was literally a porn dealer in my middle school. he hung out in the lunch line trying to convince people to spend their lunch money on porn instead.
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That kid's biggest crime is being stupid. And, seriously, why the hell does he need to violate mom's Kindle with that kind of crap? Doesn't he still have access to a computer with, you know, a color screen?
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That kid's biggest crime is being stupid. And, seriously, why the hell does he need to violate mom's Kindle with that kind of crap? Doesn't he still have access to a computer with, you know, a color screen?
I think you missed the part where Eel identified him as "autistic" :P
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Ah, yup. :-[
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But banning him from the PS3 because of some porn? Harsh. Mans gotta do what a mans gotta do and all.
Is this what's considered harsh parenting these days?
A parent and child have an implicit agreement: each one knows that the other is looking at porn, but both agree to conceal their activities. This agreement is breached when the child takes a parent's ebook reader, which he is barred from using, and loads it up with porn.
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Guess law school was good for something after all.
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:-\
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My first experience with anything pornographic was finding water damaged tattered pages of some hardcore mag strewn across the local woods me and my friend used to play in. I was probably around 8 or 9. Watching anal fisting on your parents iMac is certainly not as whimsy.
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That wasn't water.
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My first ever porno was a BBW mag I found in the local woods... now that I think back to it, that probably explains a lot of my tastes...
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Apparently the local woods is a gold mine of old porno mags.
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we found a bunch of bondage mags in the woods. we saw naked pics, but couldn't tell if it was porn or not. like why were all those women just sitting there tied up, can't even see her face or anything :'(
between that and having child porn sent to me on AOL, I'm thankful for my 13 year old ignorance about sex.
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Are we talking HARDCORE PORN or SOFTCORE PORN
Because if it's hardcore porn, I found a tape in my dad's drawer and watched that shit EVERY DAY FOR A YEAR. My dad would come into my room and TAKE it, and put it back when i wasn't there.
If it's softcore, I turned it to cinemax once late at night when I was a kid, at my grandma's place. I'd sleep in her bed with her, so I'd be sitting over the edge and making sure she didn't wake up while watching some crazy shit.
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:lol
I first masturbated to Jet Magazines; each one has a "beauty of the week" page with a chick in a bikini, and I took about 4 Jets from my grandma's house and beat off at home; I remember thinking I pissed myself after my first explosion, and jumping out my bunk bed and rushing to the bathroom.
My first porn experience...hmm. Soft core wise, it was shopped nudes of Britney Spears and Christina Agulera. Shortly after that I saw this amazing pic of Gillian Anderson with a dick near her face. I didn't see an actual blowjob until I stumbled across an Asian porn site, then later.
I used to download porn on a 56k AOL connection with Kazaa. The videos rarely finished so I'd often beat off to like the first 2 minutes of a video. To this day, if a video starts with porn stars talking or even slowly stripping I get antsy and skip to the middle
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Himu :rofl
that's the most gangsta shit ever
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the fuck is up with all of your woods? :lol
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THE WOODS
HERE BE PORN
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Another story
Near some other woods that had a small back road there was this hill that dropped off near the edge of the road. People would dump trash over the hill and, oddly, old VHS tapes. I remember going down the hill out of curiosity and finding weathered VHS tape here and there and bringing them back home. There was a weird thrill in finding this shit and not knowing what it would contain. It was mostly 80's vintage (at the time, it was like around 2001) hardcore. Slapping the monkey to mystery tapes the woods provided.
Thinking about it now, its sort of amazing what a horny 13 year old would do and stand for just to catch a glimpse of freaky shit. Thinking about handling those VHS tapes now... urrrkkkk.
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(http://i39.tinypic.com/21ot3ef.gif)
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The videostore I worked at in college rented out pornos. Never did we get one returned past the halfway mark. Saved us some rewind time I spose.
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This is basically the best story ever.
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So she told me today that she sat him down and had a talk with him, and told him that it wasn't what he was looking at but where he was looking at it. He is gonna be allowed on the PS3 on Wednesday. She also said if he ever fucks with her shit again he loses PS3/computer/Wii privileges for a solid month. He knows the stakes. Is looking at a grainy black and white spread asshole worth losing a month of gaming? We'll see!
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PLEASE KEEP US UPDATED
Seriously, I want to know how long he can last :lol
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So she told me today that she sat him down and had a talk with him, and told him that it wasn't what he was looking at but where he was looking at it. He is gonna be allowed on the PS3 on Wednesday. She also said if he ever fucks with her shit again he loses PS3/computer/Wii privileges for a solid month. He knows the stakes. Is looking at a grainy black and white spread asshole worth losing a month of gaming? We'll see!
Momz, laying' down th' LAW! :lol
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UPDATE:
I gave her my HP Touchpad when I bought the iPad. She loves it for web browsing and watching Netflix (on the hacked CM9 android side).
GUESS WHAT HAPPENED
SPOILER: THE INEVITABLE HAPPENED
Phone call:
"Can you get a virus on this tablet?"
"Maybe on the Android part of it, I seriously doubt you can on the WebOS side. Why? No, wait. I already know why. How many spread open assholes did you see?"
"I don't even want to talk about what I saw."
This time she took the power cord out of the PS3 :lol
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Tell him to go to the woods, that's where all the good porno is at.
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How did I miss this thread?! :lol
After reading all these "found porn in the woods" stories, I feel like an old school rpg about porn would be a good idea.
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The only time I saw "found porno" was under a bridge in Japan.
Man, your GF's kid has a fucking problem, Eel.
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"No, wait. I already know why. How many spread open assholes did you see?"
"I don't even want to talk about what I saw."
:lol
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Given the kid's ingenuity, I wouldn't be surprised if he's downloading porn on digital watches and electric dart boards soon.
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How did I miss this thread?! :lol
I was thinking this too :lol
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Wow, I found porn in the woods when I was a kid, too. Had no idea that was a common thing. I even buried some there for future generations.
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You need to post pics of this shit. So we can see what he sees.
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I've never seen any of it, I'm just going by what she tells me.
Kid just needs some relief, he just turned 16 and really doesn't have a lot of contact with females. She was thinking getting a subscription to Playboy or one of the milder girlie mags might help keep him off every electronic device in the house, but I think once you've seen the underbelly of internet porn airbrushed boobs aren't gonna do it for you anymore :lol
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Print out some Literotica or Hustler letters
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Oh my god the tears :rofl
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I've never seen any of it, I'm just going by what she tells me.
Kid just needs some relief, he just turned 16 and really doesn't have a lot of contact with females. She was thinking getting a subscription to Playboy or one of the milder girlie mags might help keep him off every electronic device in the house, but I think once you've seen the underbelly of internet porn airbrushed boobs aren't gonna do it for you anymore :lol
Split the difference and get him a Hustler. Then again if you keep finding gaping assholes and girls taking in giant dildos, Hustler probably won't cut it either.
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As a man who used to work in the porno industry, this thread is lollercaust level 5 :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl