Evilbore: Teach me how to play Chess.

[Eduardo24]

I went online and played this shit yesterday (never played seriously) and I was subject to every kind of rape and anal violation known to mankind. 

Teach me.

Go.

[Saint Cornelius]

have at it, mang

[MrAngryFace]

iirc chess has a collection of opening moves that pretty much decide how the game will go in the first few minutes. I can play against normal people, but people who have memorized the moves always blindside me.

[Van Cruncheon]

i have never, ever been good at chess. :'(

[demi]

Fool's Move FTW

[FlameOfCallandor]

Try Go instead. It's older, more fun and you can give players a handicap depending on skill level. It also hasn't been solved yet.

[CajoleJuice]

Who the fuck plays Go?

Chess FTW.

Even though I'm not particularly good at it.

[cloudwalking]

i used to be in chess club when i was in school

[CajoleJuice]

Nerd

[MrAngryFace]

Go is for crazy japaphiles

[Yeti]

one move that always fucks me up is En Passant, I fucking hate it and it makes no sense to me.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/En_passant

[demi]

Everyone knows En Passant, silly

It's not used that often, though

Here is the Fool's Move

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fool's_mate

[CajoleJuice]

I never heard of that rule. 

[Fragamemnon]

I was good at chess when I was a little kid, but somewhere as a teen I got into playing Bridge instead and let my chess skills atrophy.

Opening gambits in chess are the equivalent to build orders in a modern RTS game. You either know them , use them, and recognize them (and what they are trying to accomplish) , or you're at a disadvantage and will play into your opponents' hand. However, if you're playing against another novice you might be able to get away with just thinking in advance better.

[PhoenixWright]

Try Go instead. It's older, more fun and you can give players a handicap depending on skill level. It also hasn't been solved yet.

Just wait until Akira Touya figures out the Divine Move.