Author Topic: 1UP, Edge Magazine, you are SO not (Read 4254 times)

Mondain · « **on:** July 20, 2007, 02:14:03 AM »

http://www.1up.com/do/reviewPage?cId=3161373

3.5 out of 10 for Hot Shots Tennis

Quote

In some circles, Hot Shots Golf is considered the best golf series on the PlayStation 2. So it's a logical extension of Clap Hanz's capabilities to bring another Hot Shots-style sport to market (even this late in the PS2 cycle). Problem is the simplicity in their golf franchise left everything in the user's hands -- here in Hot Shots Tennis, the simplicity is just plain boring.

The gameplay mechanics are solid enough (though completely simple) and the graphics are fine, but the game has all the personality of a Honda Civic. The characters are glib and uninteresting: One kid plays in swim trunks, another is an Indian chief, and the rest are dressed as boring old tennis players. Hot Shots Golf was based on goofball characters, but the characters here shine as brightly as broken flashlights. This issue could have been solved by create-a-player, but no such luck. It seems creating players, particularly on the PS2, is a gaming standard now -- but you won't find it here.

But the game's biggest flaw is that it requires you to self-motivate (much like Motorstorm, another Sony game, only this one's way shier on graphics). Instead of giving inspiring unlockables or setting up unique challenges, this one challenges you simply to win matches. The reward? Lame unlockables like even more boring characters, access to new costumes, and new umpires to call matches. Excited yet? Neither are we. Where are the new rackets that let you smack the ball harder? Or new shoes that make you a fraction faster? It doesn't need to be on the levels of Virtua Tennis or Top Spin, but an opportunity for some kind of depth and replayability was missed. Also, if you're expecting minigames...sorry. The training is the only mode outside of the main single-player mode and exhibition, and it's less than thrilling to say the least.

The market is flooded with simple tennis games (Mario Tennis and Wii Sports' Tennis come to mind), and this one is fun enough -- the way Pong is fun enough -- but it has no depth at all. The game's big win is its multiplayer, but aren't most games fun with friends? In the end, this one poses as a tennis game for beginners, but even tykes will only be mildly amused.

Worst gaming review ever? Geezus, whoever's the douchebag who wrote this managed to top even the initial Neverwinter Nights 2 review in terms of sheer incompetence and ignorance.

YEAH AT 1UP WE KEEP IT REAL AND GIVE GAMES THE CONTROVERSIAL LOW SCORES THAT THEY DESERVE

Come the fuck on, yeah the game is pretty barebones, but the foundations are solid. And you DO look stupid since nearly EVERY DAMN WEB SITE OUT THERE gave it either 70 or 80%. I had a fucking blast with the import, even moreso than with Virtua Tennis 3 and all its creepy-looking pro tennis players who take out out to tennis dates. FUCK YOU GUYS

Yeah, it doesn't matter if the simple pick up and play arcade sports gameplay is stellar! ALL THAT MATTERS IS THE AMOUNT OF CREATE-A-PLAYER OPTIONS AND THE MULTIMEDIA UNLOCKABLES WITH GANGSTA RAPPERS CAMEOS! Someone pinch me, this text just CAN'T be real. 1UP is even MORE shameful for game journalism than Dailyradar was back in the days.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #1 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:19:15 AM »

The demo got negative feedback and was buggy - who was honestly expecting much from this? You're the only one I've seen pimp this.

Himu · « **Reply #2 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:20:52 AM »

Quote from: Willco on July 20, 2007, 02:19:15 AM

The demo got negative feedback and was buggy - who was honestly expecting much from this? You're the only one I've seen pimp this.

It's HOT SHOTS. Are you SERIOUS?!

Mondain · « **Reply #3 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:21:23 AM »

Clap Hanz has an awesome pedigree, and the import was shit hot.

Geez, it's an obscure PS2 game released at the end of the system's life cycle amid the summer, of COURSE no one's going to notice it. Still it doesn't justify bullshit like this when no one cares about a minor budget sports games and the ZD guyz can get away with it without creating controversy.

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #4 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:24:14 AM »

I like the game a lot. Willco gave Transformers a B- and owned Shadowrun. Go figure.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #5 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:24:32 AM »

Quote from: Himuro on July 20, 2007, 02:20:52 AM

It's HOT SHOTS. Are you SERIOUS?!

It's Hot Shots Tennis. Again, the demo was out for months. It was buggy and relatively lame. There's been no buzz on this. Everyone knows the A TEAM was working on the PS3 Golf installment, not this last minute cash grab.

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #6 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:25:45 AM »

I like how buzz = quality. Musta been how Transformers got a B- lol.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #7 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:27:48 AM »

Dude, if it was remotely awesome, it would've gotten some coverage... anywhere. Especially considering the Hot Shots pedigree. And again, the demo was OUT and the feedback was negative. Plus, it even had to be recalled due to bugs. I don't get why you'd take this as a personal affront. It's a mediocre game - it got a bad score. I doubt it's some conspiracy.

Mediocre games don't necessarily mean that you can no longer justify your purchase or enjoy them. Shadowrun, by all accounts, was mediocre - and I sure as hell enjoyed it. Although, I had the benefit of not paying real money for it or even approximate value.

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #8 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:28:57 AM »

B- Transformers.

Mondain · « **Reply #9 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:29:37 AM »

Fuck, that's it. I buy little game software anymore, but am going to use some of my EBGames store credit to get a copy of this great game to play on the PS3 tomorrow morning, JUST TO SPITE THE ZD DOUCHES. Hard to refuse for 34.99$ CDN.

Willco, what are you on about? Hot Shots is only popular in Japan, it's virtually UNKNOWN in America. The Japanese game was well received and wasn't buggy. I read about the game's development history and it's everything but a last minute quick cash grab.

Mupepe · « **Reply #10 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:30:33 AM »

Quote from: Lil' Slugger on July 20, 2007, 02:24:14 AM

I like the game a lot. Willco gave Transformers a B- and owned Shadowrun. Go figure.

shadowrun is awesome, fucker.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #11 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:31:09 AM »

Instead of tossing around other people's opinions to justify your own, why don't you say, "Hey, I enjoyed it - it was fun! Fuck you all!" Differing opinions don't have to be interpreted as attacks on your personal taste.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #12 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:31:45 AM »

Quote from: Mondain on July 20, 2007, 02:29:37 AM

Hot Shots is only popular in Japan, it's virtually UNKNOWN in America.

Uh, not really.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #13 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:32:57 AM »

hot shots tennis is great, not remotely buggy, and is vastly better than shadowrun.

Himu · « **Reply #14 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:33:12 AM »

This thread gives me a HEADACHE

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #15 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:34:07 AM »

mondain posts tend to require the ibuprofen, indeed, but he's right in this case

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #16 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:34:10 AM »

Quote from: Professor Prole on July 20, 2007, 02:32:57 AM

hot shots tennis is great, not remotely buggy, and is vastly better than shadowrun.

I highly doubt the first claim, I would hope the second claim is true by final build and don't doubt the last claim.

Mupepe · « **Reply #17 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:34:58 AM »

Quote from: Professor Prole on July 20, 2007, 02:32:57 AM

hot shots tennis is great, not remotely buggy, and is vastly better than shadowrun.

I didn't say it wasn't. BUT SHADOWRUN ISN'T BAD, TURD.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #18 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:35:49 AM »

hs tennis is indeed great. it's a slick little tennis game with good physics and controls. i've had to unlearn my virtua tennis skillz to play it better, but i like the way you can place shots precisely. also, the ai is really well tuned. best tennis game since the original top spin!

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #19 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:37:44 AM »

Quote from: Mupepe on July 20, 2007, 02:34:58 AM

Quote from: Professor Prole on July 20, 2007, 02:32:57 AM
hot shots tennis is great, not remotely buggy, and is vastly better than shadowrun.
I didn't say it wasn't. BUT SHADOWRUN ISN'T BAD, TURD.

hush, my little flip whore. shadowrun is bad, but that does not make you bad in turn.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #20 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:38:49 AM »

Quote from: Drinky Crow

best tennis game since the original top spin!

Hyperbole wins you no argument; to put this against the original Top Spin is almost a challenge.

Himu · « **Reply #21 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:39:14 AM »

HOT SHOTS TENNIS

I'm going to buy it because it's a TENNIS game, as well as HOT SHOTS. It's a recipe for SUCCESS.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #22 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:42:27 AM »

hs tennis is directly comparable to rockstar's table tennis in price, depth, and options, and the latter scored 7s and 8s. the mags are full of shit, and willco likes to get pegged by obese teenagers in exchange for used copies of harvest moon gc.

Himu · « **Reply #23 on:** July 20, 2007, 02:45:25 AM »

Quote from: Professor Prole on July 20, 2007, 02:42:27 AM

hs tennis is directly comparable to rockstar's table tennis in price, depth, and options, and the latter scored 7s and 8s. the mags are full of shit, and willco likes to get pegged by obese teenagers in exchange for used copies of harvest moon gc.

i shall own BOTH

Oblivion · « **Reply #24 on:** July 20, 2007, 04:47:04 AM »

So how does this compare to say, Mario Tennis?

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #25 on:** July 20, 2007, 10:57:33 AM »

way better than the godawful mario tennis offering on the 'cube, for sure!

Wobedraggled · « **Reply #26 on:** July 20, 2007, 11:16:37 AM »

Quote from: Professor Prole on July 20, 2007, 10:57:33 AM

way better than the godawful mario tennis offering on the 'cube, for sure!

SHOCK AND/OR AWE

Eduardo24 · « **Reply #27 on:** July 20, 2007, 11:19:44 AM »

Just because a game is "FUN" doesn´t mean it deserves a score of 7 or above. I can understand why the reviewer gave it 3.5. Its seems like a very formulaic game. 1-UP is still far from what I expect from them though. Giving shallow games like Bully scores of 10.

Game reviewers should be more critics and less fanboys. I whish they were as harsh as movie critics and give low scores to overhyped games if the game is calling for it. 80% of times, the overhyped games are given high scores to feed the fanboys. IGN reviewed TMNT (the movie) and gave it a fucking 7, while the movie critis TRASHED the thing, and for good reason.

http://movies.ign.com/articles/774/774820p1.html

Embarrasing.

Himu · « **Reply #28 on:** July 20, 2007, 11:48:57 AM »

Quote from: Eduardo24 on July 20, 2007, 11:19:44 AM

Just because a game is "FUN" doesn´t mean it deserves a score of 7 or above. I can understand why the reviewer gave it 3.5. Its seems like a very formulaic game.

You have to be KIDDING ME. 3.0 means WAY WAY WAY BELOW AVERAGE. A game cannot be fun if it is below average.

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #29 on:** July 20, 2007, 12:48:06 PM »

3.5 is ridiculous. At LEAST a 5.5. A 3.5 is reserved for horrible shit like robocop on Xbox. Come on morons.

Mondain · « **Reply #30 on:** July 20, 2007, 03:50:50 PM »

Yep, got the game and of course I had a fucking blast with it. Such entertaining pick-up and play sports gameplay. Approximately 3823423x as good of a game as Wii Sports.

Clap Hanz is the most underrated developper in the whole gaming industry.

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #31 on:** July 20, 2007, 04:38:40 PM »

BUH BUH BUH BUZZ!

News:

Author Topic: 1UP, Edge Magazine, you are SO not (Read 4254 times)