Author Topic: Walter S."The Wild FIRE"Ragland, Jr. has reached the top level of homojapuality  (Read 2773 times)

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Ichirou

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Walter S. "The Wild FIRE" Ragland, Jr. is a 30 year old IT professional with a Bachelor of Science degree in computer science.  He lives in Tokyo, Japan.  "Wild FIRE: Legend of the Ryukage" began as a video game design project when he was just 13 years old, but has blossomed into an action sci-fi epic the likes of which mankind has never seen before (or: it's like Dragon Ball Z, but starring a black guy).

I had the good fortune to meet Walter S. "The Wild FIRE" Ragland, Jr. at last year's Tokyo Game Show.  I was sitting down in a corner of one of TGS's massive convention halls checking out my bag of cheap swag when a distinguished-looking young black gentleman waved at me and came over.



"Enjoying the show?"
"Not really, it's been a boring show so far."  My mind raced.  Who was this guy?  A fellow teacher I'd met at some conference?  Another GAFfer?  Why the hell was he talking to me?
"What game has impressed you the most?"
"I dunno...I've been sort of disappointed by the stuff I was looking forward to."
"Yeah, that's cool."
We were at an impasse.  He stared at me silently for a few seconds before seeming to come to a decision.

"Hey, man, you like to read?"
"...not really," I lied, wanting this dude to just go away.  Who the fuck are you?, I mentally questioned him. Am I supposed to know you from somewhere?
"You should read this," he reached into his bag and pulled out a book.  Some kind of Christian tract, I assumed.  At a fucking video game show.
"Uhm, no thanks, I don't really -"
"It's free, man.  Read it.  It might change your life.  And if you like it, just pass it along to your friends."
I looked at the title.  Wild FIRE: The Legend of the Ryukage Clans, Volume 1, by Walter S. Ragland, Jr.
"...yeah, okay.  Thanks."
"No problem.  Enjoy the show!" With this, the man (who I would only later realize was Walter S. "The Wild FIRE" Ragland, Jr. himself) stood up and left.

I opened the book...and found it to be poorly written, self-published teenage power fantasy wankery of the highest order.  Ostensibly science-fiction, the main character of the book (I assume, I only skimmed a few pages) is an Afro-American bio-enhanced powerful warrior who bears a slight physical resemblance to Walter S. "The Wild FIRE" Ragland, Jr. himself.  In the description, I mean.  The CG art (created by Walter S. "The Wild FIRE" Ragland, Jr.) doesn't seem to resemble much other than a mannequin.



This character, named Zinjin, is involved in some sort of interstellar war against some aliens that seem to resemble Klingons mixed with Dragon Ball Z characters (as they apparently fight in hand-to-hand combat in the vacuum of space).  The pivotal fight (oh, but am I giving too much away?) involves Zinjin and the alien emperor "charging up their kis" and slugging it out with each other in outer space, with the fate of Earth in the balance.  Zinjin himself apparently has such good eyesight that he can see Earth space ship "several light years away."

200 plus pages of this trash.  If this had been written by Walter S. "The Wild FIRE" Ragland, Jr. when he was 13, it would be kind of sad, but still understandable.  The fact that this was written and self-published by Walter S. "The Wild FIRE" Ragland, Jr. at 30 years of age, and that in his preface he states that he believes this book can HELP those who read it...well, I just shook my head and chuckled in a bemused sorta way.

The book includes a CD and an errata paper which announces the publication of Wild FIRE: The Legend of the Ryukage Clan Volume 1+, which promises "Improved writing style!" and "200 extra pages of ACTION."

I'm thinking of sending the book to distantmantra.

The author's website: www.ryukage.com (includes a link to an RPGMaker download of a game...apparently if you play the game, based on the RYUKAGE CLAN MYTHOS (tm), you can enter a sweepstakes to win a copy of the book as well as game systems, if you trust the guy with your address, lol).

P.S. I'm bored at work, as you can tell from the above post.  I'm trying to entertain myself. :/
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MrAngryFace

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When no one in your native country likes yer shit, move. Case in point, David Hasslehoff
o_0

As soon as I started reading your post, I knew you'd be sending it to me.  :lol :lol :lol

Now I don't feel so bad about a few of things I'm throwing in the box.
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Ichirou

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Oh, I failed to mention that the book came with a CD featuring a full RPG that takes place in the RYUKAGE CLAN (tm) universe (probably the same RPG Maker one featured in the website) and CG wallpapers of Wild FIRE characters!!!!
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demi

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[youtube=425,350]Ad5FUrm0LjA[/youtube]

woot
fat

Oh my!
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Robo

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That guy is better at directing action than Jon Favreau.
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MrAngryFace

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STRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY IN THE COLD BRREEEzE THAT I WALK ALONE
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Ichirou

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From the back of the book:

Quote
In a world on the brink of destruction.
In a time of hopelessness and chaos,
In a future with no promise of tomorrow,
A hero will emerge and an ancient prophecy will be fulfilled as five mystical clans of immense power awaken to meet their destiny in the ultimate showdown between good and evil in which only one will prevail. The legend begins now…

With a superb blend of ancient oriental philosophy, super-advanced technology and hard-hitting action, Wild FIRE is the ultimate edge-of-your-seat sci-fi adventure which is destined to remind us that no matter what race, creed, or hardship we may endure; within each one of us lies the power to do the impossible.

DISTANTMANTRA YOU MUST BE PRETTY FUCKING HYPED TO READ THIS, HUH!?!? :hyper :hyper :hyper
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From the back of the book:

Quote
In a world on the brink of destruction.
In a time of hopelessness and chaos,
In a future with no promise of tomorrow,
A hero will emerge and an ancient prophecy will be fulfilled as five mystical clans of immense power awaken to meet their destiny in the ultimate showdown between good and evil in which only one will prevail. The legend begins now…

With a superb blend of ancient oriental philosophy, super-advanced technology and hard-hitting action, Wild FIRE is the ultimate edge-of-your-seat sci-fi adventure which is destined to remind us that no matter what race, creed, or hardship we may endure; within each one of us lies the power to do the impossible.

DISTANTMANTRA YOU MUST BE PRETTY FUCKING HYPED TO READ THIS, HUH!?!? :hyper :hyper :hyper

I'm so incredibly stoked. You have no idea how stoked I am...
















TO KILL IT WITH FIRE!!
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Ichirou

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Hopefully after you finish reading it you can recommend to your school system that they adopt the book as one of the cornerstones of their American literature classes.  It's like the American version of Lord of the Ring, man.























Are you really going to burn it?  That seems kind of racist considering it was written by a black dude. :(
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Van Cruncheon

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duc

I might use it for this year's white elephant Christmas gift exchange, hilarity may ensue.
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Ichirou

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I might use it for this year's white elephant Christmas gift exchange, hilarity may ensue.

See, I just wanted to make a thread about Wild FIRE and Walter S. Ragland, Jr. before I sent it to you because then I would have lost my chance. :(

I hope more people discover Wild FIRE and the RYUKAGE CLAN MYTHOS (tm) by reading this thread.
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I might use it for this year's white elephant Christmas gift exchange, hilarity may ensue.

See, I just wanted to make a thread about Wild FIRE and Walter S. Ragland, Jr. before I sent it to you because then I would have lost my chance. :(

I hope more people discover Wild FIRE and the RYUKAGE CLAN MYTHOS (tm) by reading this thread.

Send it, I'll flip through it so it can change my life.
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Ichirou

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Somewhere in Tokyo, Walter S. "The Wild FIRE" Ragland, Jr. is smiling.
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Somewhere in Tokyo, Walter S. "The Wild FIRE" Ragland, Jr. is smiling.

I should film myself burning the book and then throw it up on YouTube so Mr. Ragland, Jr. can bear witness to the real WILD FIRE.
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Ichirou

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Junpei the Tracer!

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OMG TRULY EPIC LULZ.
Boo

Tauntaun

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(Image removed from quote.)

pic reminds me of this black japafag on last week's The Soup who was actually in love with his doll.  He actually said, "at first it was just sex, sex, sex but now it's, it's gotten to the point where we can talk about stuff."  .....IT'S A DOLL MORAN!  :maf  The best line had to be when he was saying how his dad had a problem with rishi-chan or whatever the doll's name was and him because she, *sigh* isn't "real".  :lol :lol  dude also had the stupidest emo flip ever!  :maf
:)

Ichirou

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Junpei the Tracer!

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(Image removed from quote.)

pic reminds me of this black japafag on last week's The Soup who was actually in love with his doll.  He actually said, "at first it was just sex, sex, sex but now it's, it's gotten to the point where we can talk about stuff."  .....IT'S A DOLL MORAN!  :maf  The best line had to be when he was saying how his dad had a problem with rishi-chan or whatever the doll's name was and him because she, *sigh* isn't "real".  :lol :lol  dude also had the stupidest emo flip ever!  :maf

That's actually PD!

(Image removed from quote.)

 :lol
Boo

(Image removed from quote.)

pic reminds me of this black japafag on last week's The Soup who was actually in love with his doll.  He actually said, "at first it was just sex, sex, sex but now it's, it's gotten to the point where we can talk about stuff."  .....IT'S A DOLL MORAN!  :maf  The best line had to be when he was saying how his dad had a problem with rishi-chan or whatever the doll's name was and him because she, *sigh* isn't "real".  :lol :lol  dude also had the stupidest emo flip ever!  :maf

I watched that documentary on BBC America and kinda did running commentary on it here on EB, it was called Love Me, Love My Doll. That dude had Vampire teeth veneers.
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bagofeyes

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Himu

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this thread is hilarious
IYKYK

drohne

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[youtube=425,350]Ad5FUrm0LjA[/youtube]

woot

this is really little worse than proper animu, and it was produced by one black gentleman rather than an army of koreans. it's kind of a marvel of efficiency

Ichirou

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I wish I'd gotten him to autograph my copy of Wild FIRE: Legend of the Ryukage Clan Vol. 1.  Then I'd never give it away.
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Phoenix Dark

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Can we at least agree that Walter S. "The Wild FIRE" Ragland, Jr. is more talented than Rob Liefeld?
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Ichirou

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Walter S. "The Wild FIRE" Ragland, Jr. is indeed more talented than Rob Liefeld.  But, y'know, my neighbor's mentally challenged five year old son is more talented than Rob Liefeld.  That's an awfully short measuring stick.
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