evilbore multipass! drinky blurbs up some recent releases

[Van Cruncheon]

wild arms 5: great characters; awesome battle system; erratic plot and some great scenario direction. surely the best wild arms game, although that's like declaring "casino royale" the best bond, given the massive and necessary room for improvement. there's some very skies of arcadia style charm here, and oh my the specials, but ouch wow jesus SHUT UP DEAN man is the middle-of-the-game plot crap. 7.5/10

persona 3: some middling but oddly compelling dungeon crawling meets microsoft project. i need a gannt chart just to minmax my animu avatar's social life! fuck this shit, and supermegafuck the AWFUL AWFUL SOUNDTRACK, which is aural herpes. killer character and graphic design, especially on the ui. i keep playing although i know better. 7/10

bioshock: pretty, immersive, engaging. unfortunately, it still feels a bit hollow in terms of character development and mechanics. it's a museum game like primal or shenmue, only it's really good. 8.5/10

blue dragon: i love all the secrets and the dungeon design gives me a 40 hour scholarship to boner academy. how is "kluke" a legitimate name? i do not like akira toriyama characters, but his monsters are the very definition of charming. jawesome uematsu score; his best since ff8. 8/10

guild wars: eye of the north: why did i buy this? oh, yeah, i'm functionally distinguished mentally-challenged and needed to spend $40. even worse, i could have spent it on blue dragon that day. great art, great network code, abhorrent gameplay. pity how they ripped blizzard's expansion so shamelessly. 1/10

lair: a game only john carmack could appreciate. it's a scene demo (music and all) that isn't even good looking to the average gamer. if you like your procedural terrain algorithms and large-scale global lighting models to feature ugly-ass dragons, terrible mission design, and pointlessly cumbersome controls, then give this game a 100 out of 10. for everyone else who is well-adjusted and doesn't have their own personal dragon fuck buddy living in their head, it's: 2/10

jeanne d'arc: better-than-decent srpg with great albeit dithery graphics. jeanne and her companions are amiable enough, but the battles are way too easy for the genre and the skill system is too shallow. tactics ogre this ain't, but the looks make up for it -- it's the catherine bell of srpgs. 6.5/10

two worlds: well, it's better than lair. 'nuff said! 4/10

dragoneer's aria: i've pissed bloody cock cheese more appealing than this game. i would rather get fellated by angus scrimm in seattle's own club z than ever see the start screen of this game again. why? the defining moment when i realized i was not only smelling the reek of gaming shit but passing out from the stench happened when i fought a random encounter with an enemy that had 3000 hp when i could only do 10-30 damage, and all previous enemies had only 300 hp. 0/10

edit: oh my grammar errors. fuck this shit! i'm lazy.

[demi]

You aren't even that far in Blue Dragon. Keep playing.

[Van Cruncheon]

hey, i've played these games as long as the average egm reviewer.

[demi]

Ok, I'll allow it.

I'd rate Dragoneer's Aria over Persona 3, though. At least Dragoneer's Aria is up front with its cheeseburgers.

[Van Cruncheon]

you make baby himu cry :'(

[MrAngryFace]

Lol Persona 3. I havent touched that in a while now.

[bluemax]

Next Paycheck Blue Dragon is mine.

[Van Cruncheon]

blue dragon has convinced me that sakaguchi is actually a very good rpg director despite what ff6 and ff7 might suggest

[demi]

it helps that it looks very gorgeous

i played bioshock naked once, i might have to do it again with blue dragon

[MrAngryFace]

I like how im not trying to pass math class and help old people in bookstores while I rpg

[Oblivion]

blue dragon has convinced me that sakaguchi is actually a very good rpg director despite what ff6 and ff7 might suggest

I don't think he directed 7..did he?

[Van Cruncheon]

y'know, i'm not sure. i wish i was andrew vestal today.

[demi]

Hironobu Sakaguchi has been credited, in some capacity, with the following games.[1]

ASH: Archaic Sealed Heat
Cry On
Lost Odyssey (2007)
Blue Dragon (2006)
Final Fantasy XII (2006)
Kingdom Hearts II (2005)
Final Fantasy VII Advent Children (2004) (note: this is a computer generated movie)
Final Fantasy Tactics Advance (2003)
Final Fantasy X-2 (2003)
Final Fantasy XI (2002)
Final Fantasy Origins (2002)
Kingdom Hearts (2002)
Driving Emotion Type-S (2001)
Final Fantasy Chronicles (2001)
Final Fantasy X (2001)
The Bouncer (2000)
Final Fantasy IX (2000)
Vagrant Story (2000)
Chocobo Racing (1999)
Chrono Cross (1999)
Final Fantasy Anthology (1999)
Final Fantasy VIII (1999)
Front Mission 3 (1999)
Parasite Eve II (1999)
Saga Frontier 2 (1999)
Brave Fencer Musashi (1998)
Bushido Blade 2 (1998)
Chocobo's Dungeon 2 (1998)
Ehrgeiz (1998)
Parasite Eve (1998)
Xenogears (1998)
Bushido Blade (1997)
Einhänder (1997)
Final Fantasy Tactics (1997)
Final Fantasy VII (1997)
Bahamut Lagoon (1996)
Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars (1996)
Tobal No.1 (1996)
Chrono Trigger (1995)
Seiken Densetsu 3 (1995)
Final Fantasy VI (1994)
Final Fantasy V (1992)
Final Fantasy IV (1991)
Final Fantasy III (1990)
Final Fantasy II (1988)
Final Fantasy (1987)
Rad Racer (1987)

[Ichirou]

Sounds like Persona 3 is a disappointment.  Guess I should skip it.

[Van Cruncheon]

it's not a disappointment if you like the social management aspect of dating sims, but evaluated as a dungeon crawler -- which is all i care about -- it's slightly above mediocre.

[MrAngryFace]

If you want sakura taisen for boys, this is it. Wish they just said that on the box and spared me the personal shame.

[tiesto]

I haven't played P3 yet, but why did the game get such universal high scores? BD is fucking awesome though, the difficulty has started to ramp up quite a bit, too. Just made it to the

spoiler (click to show/hide)

robot village

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[Ichirou]

The comparison with Sakura Taisen is making my japafag radar tingle.  Himu has played both, I wonder how he would compare P3 to ST games.

[Van Cruncheon]

blue dragon

i'm glad tvc and maf didn't let me pass this one up, even after i inflicted rengoku 2 on them

[MrAngryFace]

Shin Megami Games are the Final Fantasy's of the edgy cool elite gamers that like to buy atlus games. That is why, in the past, there has been a lot of 'after the fact' buzz that made the games cult hits. All the review sites caught notice of this and went. WE WANNA BE EDGY COOL! LETS GIVE PERSONA 3 A MILLION BUX! Then another guy said HAHA A MILLION BUX THATS STUPID HOW BOUT A GOOD SCORE? then the other guy went ...'Well ok...'

Thats cool cause normally im one of them, but unlike DDS and Nocturn and Devil Summoner, this isn't a game I can get behind entirely. I liked the dungeon part...what I played of it, but after hearing all the relationship talk and the restrictions on time to grind the tower I kinda went limp.

Ill play it someday.

[Ichirou]

Bubububububut animu and dating sim and TOKIMEKI MEMORIAL PLUS FINAL FANTASY  :'(

[MrAngryFace]

load of shit, man up and avoid it

[Ichirou]

Will do.  Sorry, Himumu, but I guess I'm going to go on a Wild Arms gaming spree next.

[MrAngryFace]

I just dont like games where I am REQUIRED to pretend to be a japanese child in school. Thats kinda a fucked up way to spend my time off.

[Ichirou]

Classes started today and I've been asking all my kids as part of the first lesson of the new term what they did during their summer vacation, if they enjoyed it, etc.  When asked "Did you enjoy your summer vacation?", literally 99% of them said "No, I didn't.  I had to come to school every day for club practice."  Poor kids; and then even in their video games they're supposed to pretend to be at school. 

[Beezy]

Thats cool cause normally im one of them, but unlike DDS and Nocturn and Devil Summoner, this isn't a game I can get behind entirely.

I can't find DDS1 and Nocturne anywhere for a reasonable price.

[MrAngryFace]

Yeah its freaky how frys has endless copies of DDS2 and Devil Summoner but Nocturne and DDS1 are impossible to find.

[etiolate]

guild wars: eye of the north: why did i buy this? oh, yeah, i'm functionally distinguished mentally-challenged and needed to spend $40. even worse, i could have spent it on blue dragon that day. great art, great network code, abhorrent gameplay. pity how they ripped blizzard's expansion so shamelessly. 1/10

haha is this the secret that you were ashamed for? Why would you buy an expansion for a game you never played far enough into?

[Error2k4]

p3 is a great game, but if you dont like one half of the gameplay be it the dungeon crawling or social stuff you are not to enjoy the game as much as someone that likes both. you basically do the same shit for 70+ hours, there is no variety at all, there are no puzzles, the locations are all the same, only 1 dungeon, bosses are a lot of times normal enemies with a different color etc... etc....

game is definitely not for everyone, but an rpg that holds my attention for 100 hours is great in my book. I like the game a lot because it lets my set my own pace and it lets me decide what to do and when to do it (except of course the full moons) and that shit really appeals to me for some reason. only thing the game disappoints me with, was the last boss battle which is complete bullshit it's such a fucking slow battle.

[Himu]

persona 3 is goty. rpgoty. rpgotg. gotg.

persona 3 makes my pants wet.

[y2kev]

sakaguchi hasn't done anything final fantasy since V, other than producing.

and you like V, drinky. so it makes sense you like BD.

[Himu]

Sakaguchi didn't even direct FFVI and VII

[Himu]

p3 is a great game, but if you dont like one half of the gameplay be it the dungeon crawling or social stuff you are not to enjoy the game as much as someone that likes both. you basically do the same shit for 70+ hours, there is no variety at all, there are no puzzles, the locations are all the same, only 1 dungeon, bosses are a lot of times normal enemies with a different color etc... etc...

There's tons of variety. What makes Persona 3 so damn addicting is that you can flip between both play styles any time you want if you get bored.

Yeah, you're doing the same thing for 60 + hours, but it's the way they did that makes the game so damn addicting. Despite doing the same thing over and over, the game has a shit load of variety and it's a 70 hour + game done right. Most of these rpgs that are this long get boring as shit 40, 50, 60 hours in. But no Persona 3. But it's the best jrpg ever.

I've never seen an rpg make me as addicted as Persona 3. The whole "just one more day!" thing really has my pants hot becuase I'll keep saying "one more day!" for hours and then as soon as I know it, I've been playing for 4-5 hours.

[MrAngryFace]

Youre so full of shit Himuro! At least Error2k4 is in a no spin zone.

[Himu]

Shin Megami Games are the Final Fantasy's of the edgy cool elite gamers that like to buy atlus games. That is why, in the past, there has been a lot of 'after the fact' buzz that made the games cult hits. All the review sites caught notice of this and went. WE WANNA BE EDGY COOL! LETS GIVE PERSONA 3 A MILLION BUX! Then another guy said HAHA A MILLION BUX THATS STUPID HOW BOUT A GOOD SCORE? then the other guy went ...'Well ok...'

Thats cool cause normally im one of them, but unlike DDS and Nocturn and Devil Summoner, this isn't a game I can get behind entirely. I liked the dungeon part...what I played of it, but after hearing all the relationship talk and the restrictions on time to grind the tower I kinda went limp.

Ill play it someday.

restrictions on time to grind the tower? what are you talking about? you have no restrictions other than the fact there are blockades before each block, and there are plenty of quests that are available that should make playing through the tower fun even with the restrictions.

The relationship stuff isn't even that different compared to normal npc engagement, it's just that it has more emphasis. I see nothing wrong with the relationship building. It's not like they're long or anything, and you don't really even "date" people aside from a few, and those are optional. You have beef that it's a school simulator when, more often than not, the school day ends in like...2 seconds.

[Van Cruncheon]

your characters get TIRED which makes them largely unusable

[y2kev]

They don't actually get tired the night before the Full Moon event, so if you want to can grind endlessly then.

[MrAngryFace]

Shin Megami Games are the Final Fantasy's of the edgy cool elite gamers that like to buy atlus games. That is why, in the past, there has been a lot of 'after the fact' buzz that made the games cult hits. All the review sites caught notice of this and went. WE WANNA BE EDGY COOL! LETS GIVE PERSONA 3 A MILLION BUX! Then another guy said HAHA A MILLION BUX THATS STUPID HOW BOUT A GOOD SCORE? then the other guy went ...'Well ok...'

Thats cool cause normally im one of them, but unlike DDS and Nocturn and Devil Summoner, this isn't a game I can get behind entirely. I liked the dungeon part...what I played of it, but after hearing all the relationship talk and the restrictions on time to grind the tower I kinda went limp.

Ill play it someday.

restrictions on time to grind the tower? what are you talking about? you have no restrictions other than the fact there are blockades before each block, and there are plenty of quests that are available that should make playing through the tower fun even with the restrictions.

The relationship stuff isn't even that different compared to normal npc engagement, it's just that it has more emphasis. I see nothing wrong with the relationship building. It's not like they're long or anything, and you don't really even "date" people aside from a few, and those are optional. You have beef that it's a school simulator when, more often than not, the school day ends in like...2 seconds.

Basically when im in school, im no grinding. I DONT WANT TO BE JAPPY SCHOOL BOY! EVER! I cant imagine WHY people want to do relationship stuff like this in games! Luminous Arc had A LITTLE and it was fuk BORING. Grow some balls. A purse is a purse you fruit!

[Himu]

Shows how much you played then, because characters stop getting tired so easily by the time they get to level 5. Once they they get to level 5 or so, you have to really grind for a long ass time for them to get tired, and it was a significant improvement even at the beginning of the game, to the point that I forgot you could get tired at all. And this was like 10 hours in. My guys are level 35-40 right now and I'm pretty they sure they could go 30, 40 floors no problem.

[MrAngryFace]

Are you ETOILET? DO I need to play a crap game 200 hours to call it crap?

I refuse to play a boring game for 10 hours.

[Himu]

Shin Megami Games are the Final Fantasy's of the edgy cool elite gamers that like to buy atlus games. That is why, in the past, there has been a lot of 'after the fact' buzz that made the games cult hits. All the review sites caught notice of this and went. WE WANNA BE EDGY COOL! LETS GIVE PERSONA 3 A MILLION BUX! Then another guy said HAHA A MILLION BUX THATS STUPID HOW BOUT A GOOD SCORE? then the other guy went ...'Well ok...'

Thats cool cause normally im one of them, but unlike DDS and Nocturn and Devil Summoner, this isn't a game I can get behind entirely. I liked the dungeon part...what I played of it, but after hearing all the relationship talk and the restrictions on time to grind the tower I kinda went limp.

Ill play it someday.

restrictions on time to grind the tower? what are you talking about? you have no restrictions other than the fact there are blockades before each block, and there are plenty of quests that are available that should make playing through the tower fun even with the restrictions.

The relationship stuff isn't even that different compared to normal npc engagement, it's just that it has more emphasis. I see nothing wrong with the relationship building. It's not like they're long or anything, and you don't really even "date" people aside from a few, and those are optional. You have beef that it's a school simulator when, more often than not, the school day ends in like...2 seconds.

Basically when im in school, im no grinding. I DONT WANT TO BE JAPPY SCHOOL BOY! EVER! I cant imagine WHY people want to do relationship stuff like this in games! Luminous Arc had A LITTLE and it was fuk BORING. Grow some balls. A purse is a purse you fruit!

But the relationship stuff is no different than doing quests for someone in say..KOTOR. It's npc engagement.

[Himu]

Are you ETOILET? DO I need to play a crap game 200 hours to call it crap?

I refuse to play a boring game for 10 hours.

It's possible to level up and have your guys not get tired within just a few hours. I said 10 hours because you can play the game at your own pace. Just because it took me 10 hours doesn't mean it'll take you 10 hours.

[MrAngryFace]

No its different because I realize it is WISH FULFILLMENT FOR japaphiles. I feel SHAMED participating in such an experiment.

Oh I WISH I was a japanese school boy oh oh I HOPE they pick me oh oh. I have the strat guide, its just a bunch of fucking social engagements.

[Van Cruncheon]

They don't actually get tired the night before the Full Moon event, so if you want to can grind endlessly then.

this is good to know!

[Himu]

How is it wish fulfillment for japafags? You don't participate in Japanese heavy activities at all. Most of the characters are pretty universal. There's a corporate slug who teaches you how to con people. There's a guy who's terminally ill. You can bully people with a guy on the student council. Hell, there's a French Japafag who thinks Japan is the best country of all time.

Most of these characters have nothing to do with being Japanese or Japan at all.

[MrAngryFace]

Any game that focuses on going to school and not being an asshole about it is CLEARLY focusing on japan.

[Himu]

Hahaha

[y2kev]

You can totally be an asshole if you want...there as Slinks you can make where you can be dickish. There aren't any slinks for secluded losers like myself though, which is upsetting, but I suppose realistic. Like, I guess that's kind of the case in real life. 

The student council Slink is great for dickitude.

Grinding peppered with NPC interaction is the perfect combo, strange as it may be. There's very little sense of fatigue for me.

[MrAngryFace]

Grinding peppered with NPC interaction is the perfect combo, strange as it may be. There's very little sense of fatigue for me.

You must just pee a lot.

[Himu]

You can totally be an asshole if you want...there as Slinks you can make where you can be dickish. There aren't any slinks for secluded losers like myself though, which is upsetting, but I suppose realistic. Like, I guess that's kind of the case in real life. 

The student council Slink is great for dickitude.

Grinding peppered with NPC interaction is the perfect combo, strange as it may be. There's very little sense of fatigue for me.

Student Council S. Link rules. Kickin' ass and takin' names. Hidetoshi owns.

Have you gotten Devil Arcana yet? You learn how to con people from a pro business man. 

[Howard Alan Treesong]

You can totally be an asshole if you want...there as Slinks you can make where you can be dickish. There aren't any slinks for secluded losers like myself though, which is upsetting, but I suppose realistic. Like, I guess that's kind of the case in real life. 

You want the Hermit S-Link:

spoiler (click to show/hide)

Stay home and play MMOs on any "vacation" day

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