Author Topic: MOVIES~! (Read 2133 times)

Mandark · « **on:** September 17, 2007, 01:36:58 AM »

3:10 to Yuma

The latest installment of "Russell Crowe makes a good, not great action movie that gets nominated for an Oscar." A bunch of people are going to think it's deep, cause it has the trappings of being deep.

There's some good action, coherent, not over-stylized, and generally treated like it matters by the plot. It's well shot, well paced, and mostly well acted. I'm saying this cause I recognize my tendency to bitch about stuff that I thought was pretty good overall.

But Russell Crowe can not pull off the charismatic psychopath. He's meant to be a toned-down, old west Hannibal Lecter, who poses a danger even in captivity. There are a bunch of scenes like this:

Russell Crowe: "Innocuous-seeming, but personal question."

Person: "Tentative response."

Crowe: "More probing question or insight which shows he is getting in someone's head."

Person 2: "Don't talk to Crowe!" or, to Crowe "Don't talk to him/her/me!"

The audience is meant to believe that the other characters are running a serious risk by letting him converse, and that he might make Migs swallow his tongue or something, but I never bought it. It's just a guy acting laconic, making small talk with some innuendo mixed in.

Also, the third act has some major character development/motivation issues. If anyone else has seen it, we can hash that out more in spoilers.

PS As a society, it's time we had a conversation about whether Christian Bale is the new Keanu Reeves.

Ichirou · « **Reply #1 on:** September 17, 2007, 01:44:01 AM »

Quote from: Mandark on September 17, 2007, 01:36:58 AM

PS As a society, it's time we had a conversation about whether Christian Bale is the new Keanu Reeves.

No offense, but fuck you!

Mandark · « **Reply #2 on:** September 17, 2007, 01:48:13 AM »

Shoot Em Up

There's a trend of smaller-budget, auterish action movies which are basically exploitation films. Smoking Aces, anything with Jason Statham, etc.

I like this trend more in theory than in practice.

demi · « **Reply #3 on:** September 17, 2007, 01:55:49 AM »

I'd let Jason Statham fuck me in the ass in front of a bus.

So kindly fuck off. Except War, I'll give you that. FUCK WAR. ASS. SHIT.

Mandark · « **Reply #4 on:** September 17, 2007, 02:03:08 AM »

I like Statham and Owen as the new generation of limey tough guys, but I don't like them enough to pretend that this stuff is like, you know, good.

Crank was definitely better than Shoot Em Up, though.

demi · « **Reply #5 on:** September 17, 2007, 02:04:30 AM »

Is the scene where he is shooting people while fucking Belluci any good? It was a scene described like that.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #6 on:** September 17, 2007, 02:06:51 AM »

it was amy smart, not monica belucci. if it had been the latter, it would've been the MOVIE OF THE FOREVER

bagofeyes · « **Reply #7 on:** September 17, 2007, 02:07:22 AM »

i wanna fuck monica belucci

Mandark · « **Reply #8 on:** September 17, 2007, 02:08:07 AM »

No, demi means in Shoot Em Up.

Yeah, there's a scene where he shoots guys while nailing Monica Bellucci, which is easily the high point of the movie.

Pretty much all the action scenes are gimmicky set pieces like that, preceded or followed by the most utterly shameless one-liners ever.

Yeti · « **Reply #9 on:** September 17, 2007, 02:11:51 AM »

The Trasporter and Crank movies are so fun. I love how they can get the plot out of the way in the first five or ten minutes to get to the good stuff.

Mandark · « **Reply #10 on:** September 17, 2007, 02:38:19 AM »

The Constant Gardener

Some people had problems with it because it's very deliberately paced and the central mystery isn't very complicated and twisty. It's sort of like The Score, where the genre raises certain expectations but the movie goes in a different direction.

I really liked it, especially the way they handled the flashbacks and the marriage stuff.

The problem with most movies in which the protagonist avenges/investigates the death of a loved one is that it's hard to get the audience to care about a character death unless they've spent time with that character. So you can bump someone off in the first 15 minutes and have the surviving husband/father wail and moan and hope the idea gets across, or you can wait an hour, bump someone off, and basically have two different movies in one. Anyone not named Simon Pegg shouldn't try this.

The Constant Gardener has the murder right away, and then intersperses flashbacks throughout the movie. It works because the dead wife was somewhat of a mystery to Ralph Fiennes, so he doesn't just spend the movie tracking her killers, but trying to redeem his marriage posthumously.

It's touching, and Fiennes does a good job as someone who's been jarred out of his button-down routine. He's like a character out of a Graham Greene novel. Or really a John le Carre novel. You know what I mean.

The one thing that annoyed me a little was that the plot hinges on a middle-class Anglo being targeted by a corporate conspiracy. As much as the big nefarious companies run things, the white bourgeoisie aren't in any physical danger from them, even if they do spend all their time protesting globalization. And yeah, I do realize this type of plot is sort of necessary in order to make a not-boring movie.

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #11 on:** September 17, 2007, 02:41:55 AM »

Lord of the Rings

Im not normally a fan of gay hobbits bouncing on a bed while a old man watches them cackling with glee, and i'm still not.

Mandark · « **Reply #12 on:** September 17, 2007, 02:45:32 AM »

The biggest complaint against the LOTR movies is usually that they're too long, especially the last one.

Have there ever been special edition DVD's where they advertised less footage and never-before-seen editing?

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #13 on:** September 17, 2007, 02:47:21 AM »

I actually bought the 'short' editions cause the extended editions were just chock full of crap.

Ichirou · « **Reply #14 on:** September 17, 2007, 04:38:50 AM »

The worst is Return of the King, which has all the false endings. I remember seeing it in theaters (for the second time) with my cousin and her boyfriend, and the poor guy's bladder was about to explode...he started to sit up when the gay scene with the hobbits bouncing on the bed came on....but that wasn't the ending. Then he started to get up again after everyone bows in front of the hobbits, but that wasn't the ending either! Then, when they go back to the shire and Sam gets married...nope, not yet! When Frodo shows Sam the story he's written about their journey? Nope! Wait, what about when Frodo gets on the boat and goes to the west? No, no, not yet...you have to wait for Sam to go back to the Shire, and pick up his kids or whatever. I'm surprised my cousin's boyfriend didn't pee himself.

The sad thing is that as we were walking out of the movie, he was still talking about how awesome it was (he's a big fantasy geek). I didn't comment, because the guy gets pissed off when people disagree with him (he actually picked a fight with me when I told him I didn't see the gay innuendo he was talking about in Revenge of the Shit).

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #15 on:** September 17, 2007, 05:22:41 AM »

FOTR: 10/10
TTT: 9.5/10
ROTK: 10/10

/thread

i'm going to bed you haters catch me on the flip side!

The Sceneman · « **Reply #16 on:** September 17, 2007, 05:27:15 AM »

the LOTR movies are complete shit

bagofeyes · « **Reply #17 on:** September 17, 2007, 05:28:29 AM »

Yup, seriously gay shit

Gay Boy · « **Reply #18 on:** September 17, 2007, 08:22:07 AM »

I LOVED the LOTR movies when they came out, I was head over heels obsessed. However, my love has nearly gone totally away just for on reason. TOO LONG. Due to their length I can never just pop one in and relax, it takes a effort to sit down and watch roughly 4 hours (for those Extended cuts) of a movie. Not watching any of them for 2-3 years makes me forget I liked them in the first place.

bud · « **Reply #19 on:** September 17, 2007, 09:46:59 AM »

i can't believe keanu reeves. he was really good in the devil's advocate, but that's about the only film in which he actually acted, afaik. there were some scenes in constantine where i just couldn't believe how this guy made it as a big actor.

bale > reeves by default.

Kyle · « **Reply #20 on:** September 17, 2007, 10:02:02 AM »

Quote from: bud on September 17, 2007, 09:46:59 AM

i can't believe keanu reeves. he was really good in the devil's advocate, but that's about the only film in which he actually acted, afaik. there were some scenes in constantine where i just couldn't believe how this guy made it as a big actor.

bale > reeves by default.

bale

bud · « **Reply #21 on:** September 17, 2007, 10:05:16 AM »

kyle, you should check out empire of the sun if you haven't already. bale's only 13 in that movie, but his acting is awesome in it.

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #22 on:** September 17, 2007, 10:07:01 AM »

Bale is badass, how can anyone knock this performance?

[youtube=425,350]6VXRVq_1EYg[/youtube]

Kyle · « **Reply #23 on:** September 17, 2007, 10:18:01 AM »

Quote from: bud on September 17, 2007, 10:05:16 AM

kyle, you should check out empire of the sun if you haven't already. bale's only 13 in that movie, but his acting is awesome in it.

i'll check it out ASAP, i found it @ amazon for $5

Mandark · « **Reply #24 on:** September 17, 2007, 10:28:17 AM »

"Is the rich man's Keanu Reeves" would be closer to how I feel, but would have less trolling potential.

Also, I think PD is grading by completion.

FlameOfCallandor · « **Reply #25 on:** September 17, 2007, 10:32:56 AM »

Christian bale is pretty good, but hi have no idea why his performance in rescue dawn was celebrated. it was garbage.

Robo · « **Reply #26 on:** September 17, 2007, 11:29:49 AM »

Quote from: Mandark on September 17, 2007, 01:36:58 AM

3:10 to Yuma

Also, the third act has some major character development/motivation issues. If anyone else has seen it, we can hash that out more in spoilers.

Agreed, fully.

More of you fuckers should see it so we can get some use out of a Yuma spoiler thread.

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Author Topic: MOVIES~! (Read 2133 times)