I made this thread based on my "on the edge" disconnect so let me share my details.
My parents divorced when I was really young. My moms side and dads side of the family are like 2 different worlds.
My moms side = all normal healthy productive members of society - british family
My dads side = rowdy beligerent good ole boy network gangsters (you know they own trucking companies, many horses, bars, etc - they do 'stuff')
So as a youth I couldnt really take spending much time around my fathers barbaric side of the family. Most of them are alchaholics, dont have less than 30 rifles, handguns, shotguns, etc each and basically feel that they are above the law.
I did myself a great service by making sure I lived with my moms side of the family as a kid and ony 'visited' the ruffians on summer breaks, etc.. (which was barely barable)...
so 20 years later and my life is pretty much damn perfect. I have a solid career, I am a major equity holder/owner in a software company that does 20M/year in sales and is on track to hit 30M in 2008. My life is drama free - no fucked up friends, no crazy girl drama, dont have a single aquaintance that is problematic. And when I meet people that have wayyy too much drama for my tastes I quickly deep six tham as I know it will only drag me down.
This is all an exact opposite of my fathers side of the family. They have headaching inducing drama on a daily basis. In fact, the shyt is so thick I dont see how they get anything done....dog knows none of them work normal jobs or anything - they do their 'stuff'.
So over the last few years I have made it a point to give 1 week of my 4 week annual vacation package to visiting my faters side of the family. I know our lives are very different - they dont get me, and I dont get them - but out of respect and unconditional love for my father I would do this once a year. Every time I do it, I can barely make it thru the week. I often come close to booking an early flight home because its all just too crazy and high strung for me.
Spending time with pops isnt too bad - its just the rest of the fmaily/environment/lifestyle that is the problem. Also - with the exception of my father, none of the family likes me. They all think I am some stuck up snob because insteading of living my life like their lives, I have a normal job, and a happy life.
My father is 52 years old. For the last 5 years he has been dating a girl that is like 27 yrs old. Additionally its a wild psycho party girl who was married to a state senator. Her partying lifestyle didnt mesh with the senators life so she basically left him for my father after she was cheating on her husband with my father for like 6 months. I guess she decided it was alot more fun to hang out with pops.
Now to me this is the first place he fucked up. My ethics tell me that I will not be involved with any married women or even a girl with a comitted long term boyfriend. Getting in the middle of that shyt and you are doing nothing but asking for misery in my opinion. I steer clear.
Well of course my father didnt so he ended up harboring this young freaky chikka who ended up developing quite the narxotic habbit (pain pills, etc..)
So finally pops gets so fed up with the girlfriends addictions (she gets caught lying and stealing from my dad to support her habbits) so he cuts her off, kicks her out of his house etc... but they are still dating.... (WTF part 2 - right?)
My dad helps this crazy bitch get her own house and continues to deal with her. At this point im still not completely fed up - I am just standing at a distance thinking "this is all really fucked up, but its not my way of life so ill just be supportive where I can".
So since my dad cut the addict off you can only guess what happened next - she went out and found her a new man to support her habbits. But meanwhile she is still dating my dad.
So one day when they are supposed to hang out, the girls tells my dad that she is sick and will stay home from work that day. My dad, sensing something is up cruises over there to see her leaving her house with some other dood.
So of course being the rowdy fukk he is, he follws them and ends up getting in a confrontation with the dood - now this part I understand - I think if anyone here was seeing someone for 5 years, and then suddenly got clued in on fact that they were cheating out of no-where you would want some fucking answers. I think you deserve some kind of answers actually - but since this isnt as normal situation, and the girl doesnt want anything going dodgy with her new dealer/fuckfriend she basically calls the police, lies and says that my dad followed them and threatened to kill both of them. This isnt what happened at all. My dad was just trying to talk to his girlfriend and this 'dood' decides he wants to jump out of the car and get in the middle of it by pushing my dad, to which he politely responded by pushing the guy so hard he fells back on the ground and telling him to 'stay the fukk out of it'.
So the girl files some kind of emergency protection order by slime-ing herself into every politically correct position imaginable. In the filing she states that she is a well known member of the church community, blah blah blah and talks all kinds of shyt of shyt about my dad and what he does and how he has an aersonal of guns and should be considered armed and dangerous.
So before the court date where the judge is to decide wether or not the protection order sticks or gets thrown out the girl and my dad communicate thru a mutual lawyer friend. it is communicated that she will drop the protection order as long as my dad agrees to never call her again (basically she doesnt want to explain anything to him). I tell my dad he better just agree to it - as if the protection order sticks, he is required by law to surrender his cache of rifles, handguns, semi-automatic SMG's and the like....
My life is like this - chikkas are cool - but dont let your admiration for a girl tear down your personal empire. I wish my dad could see an rationallize things the same way, but unfortunately he cant - he just cant let it go, and I know its just because of how this fukkin girl wronged him. I know that if they had a mature conversation like adults and decided to part ways everything would be fine - but since it didnt go down that way, and basicaly my dad had intimate relations with the girl the day before he caught her with the dood - he was just totally taken by suprise with all of this.
Breaking up with someone is one thing - but when they cheat on you to do it its a whole different ball of wax.
So basically he has all of his 'doods' out there pounding the street trying to find out who this guy is, whats the fukk is going on, etc.....and its scary to me - my dad can make one phone call and have someone go over there and do his dirty work for him. This is the polar opposite of my life. I have employees and a personal assistant for my professional walks, but I do not have 'doods' I can call who will put their lives on the line to go follow, stalk harass and even physically harm people if need be.
My dads confrontation with the 'dood' happened two days before I got here to visit him for the week. So this drama has completely CONSUMED the entire week. Its all my dad talks about. Its all he talked about all day long every day and since he has so many friends I get to hear him re-tell the entire obsessed story over and over and over.
My dad has so many friends that police officers have followed the guy, got his tag number, ran reports and givin all of the details such as what vehicle the guy drives, his address, etc.. to my fater. (which is a recipe for disaster).
So all week I have been sittign at his house fuking bored because frankly I dont want to have anything to do with any part of this. I dont want to go out with him and take part in his mission of obsession - I tell him over and over to cut his losses and leave the bitch well enough alone. Posting at evilbore and playing Phantasy Star II on my PSP really has been the highlight of my vacation week. Evilbore is a sanctuary from the complete lunacy that is going on here (believe it or not)
In my life no fukkin girl trouble is worth all of this. I only give time and blood to making money.
So finally the court date comes (this morning) and that bit about the chick agreeing to drop everything was a total blufff move on her behalf. She shoes up in court, lies and says she hasnt been seeing my dad for over a year (yet as he will state she dropped by to give him some sucky sucky the night before he caught her with the dood) - she claims that my dad is armed and dangerous and has threatened her on multiple occasions over the last year (which is BS - my dad is a ruffian, but he isnt gonna get into action with someone, especially a girl unless there has beeen some issue of unexcusable disrespect - and besides that fact, the girl has made it a point to spoend time with him each and every day) So she basically bluffed him and showed up in court nailing his ass to the wall. My father has no prior criminal record and has never (directly) been involved in any violence (they good doods for that kind of stuff when needed)
So now thats it - he is prohibited to communicate with her for 3 years, and he must 'surrender' any and all firearms in his posession......and well thats not an easy task. The gun count here is major, and you can open any drawer in the house and find counteless ammounts of ammunition. I mean any drawer or cabinet...the kitchen, the bathroom, etc... hell I was looking for toenail clippers the other day - coulodnt find them but could find a plethora of 10-12 gague shotgun shells, handgun ammo, long range high calibur rife rounds, etc...
So after his court date this morning, he comes back to the house wakes me up and says "I hate to do this to you but I need your help - we must get all of the guns out of the house now" - oh fuck am I annoyed. I personally have never had any dealings with any police force anywhere, and frankly just dont like being stuck in a place one final day where I know the cops are about to show up and scrub the house looking for firearms. So I help him search thru the house and remove all of the guns. I think he had like 10 shotguns, an assortment of handguns and 15 rifles. I remind him that the court order mandates that he 'surrender' all of his weapons - Im telling him that he is already fucked up for wanting to move them somewhere else, as getting rid of them is not the same as 'surrendering' the wespons to a law enforcement agency - SO fukkin already after getting himself into this shit pot over some fukking girl he is already violating the court orders.
I am also mad at the dumb bitch. I mean she knows how my dads family is. She was in the wrong and she needed to drop this. Since she didnt, she might as well know that things are only going to get worse for her as all she did by lying and fucking him over in court was get an an uncountable number of unsavory characters on the side of being her enemy (my dad is kinda like "Jimmy the Saint" among the group - he always treats people right and as such has many loyal friends who would lay their lives on the line for him. I mean hell, cops are putting their job on the line to run DMV reports for him and provide details as to who/where this guy is.)
BUT STILL - LEAVE THE FUKKING SITUATION ALONE - no fukkin chikka bullshyt is worth all of this.
So after this week, and knowing that my dad definately isnt going to let this go and likely press on untill he lands himself in jail, I would say its about time I phase him out of my life.
I simply cannot tolerate his position on this - it goes against every value and operational procedure I have in my life.
- so shitty weak dealing with his borderline sociopathness
+
- Having to be woke up and help him scrub the house of guns this morning
+
- sitting hear just waiting on the cops to show up to search thru the house and make sure he has no guns (he doesn want to be here for that)
I think I really need to cut my ties and not look back. I just cant take this kind of shyt. I have a good normal life and the risk management side of me tells me that I have been at much risk being here all week - and I know once I leave he wont let this go.
As much as I love the big dysfunctional asshole - I cant fukk up my life being tied to his nonsense - especially all of this nonsense over a piece of ass.
