Author Topic: Conversations with very small children. (Read 3154 times)

Van Cruncheon · « **on:** October 05, 2006, 10:34:48 PM »

Let's get the typical responses to this thread out of the way:

1. LOLZ DRINKY Y U HAVE A DAUGHTER, UR FATDUMBGAY
2. LOLZ UR ATTENTION WHORE
3. LOLZ RAPE TIME

Now, onto the post proper:

I had the following conversation with my two-year-old daughter. It amused me.

<Me> Darnit, ****, will you QUIT TRYING TO STOMP ON MY POWER SUPPLY
<Her> Daddy...
<Me> What.
<Her> ...be nice to dolphins.
<Me> Okay. Are you a dolphin, sweetie?
<Her> No, that's stupid.
<Me> You remind me of a certain poster on evilbore.
<Her> That's stupid.
<Her> Be nice to dolphins.
<Her> Play the car game.

Owned.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #1 on:** October 05, 2006, 10:36:52 PM »

Your daughter called you stupid!

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #2 on:** October 05, 2006, 10:38:07 PM »

Yeah, and she gets a swat most of the time. However, it's hard to get pissed when your anti-cetacean policies come under scrutiny.

She thinks Outrun 2 is the greatest game ever created, too!

Himu · « **Reply #3 on:** October 05, 2006, 10:40:41 PM »

Kids are hilarious and say the cutest things.

Be nice to dolphins!

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #4 on:** October 05, 2006, 10:43:28 PM »

You should slaughter a dolphin and make her play with the carcas.

BlueTsunami · « **Reply #5 on:** October 05, 2006, 10:46:36 PM »

ahahhahah

Your daughter is going to make a lot of classmates cry in school if she pics up your ability to verbally own people like you do. Shes already owning the masta!

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #6 on:** October 05, 2006, 10:47:17 PM »

You curse to your two year old daughter?

Vizzys · « **Reply #7 on:** October 05, 2006, 10:47:52 PM »

LOLZ RAPE TIME

Fatghost28 · « **Reply #8 on:** October 05, 2006, 11:00:40 PM »

LOLZ DRINKY Y U HAVE A DAUGHTER, UR FATDUMBGAY

Himu · « **Reply #9 on:** October 05, 2006, 11:17:28 PM »

Why do you say fuck around her?

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #10 on:** October 05, 2006, 11:39:00 PM »

The **** is her name, not FUCK

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #11 on:** October 05, 2006, 11:41:05 PM »

PLAY THE CAR GAME

Himu · « **Reply #12 on:** October 05, 2006, 11:42:37 PM »

Quote from: Drinky Crow on October 05, 2006, 11:39:00 PM

The **** is her name, not FUCK

BlueTsunami · « **Reply #13 on:** October 05, 2006, 11:43:22 PM »

Quote from: Drinky Crow on October 05, 2006, 11:39:00 PM

The **** is her name, not FUCK

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #14 on:** October 05, 2006, 11:49:43 PM »

WATCHING DOLPHIN SHOW, GO AWAY DADDY

NO DON'T GO AWAY

PLAY CAR GAME

NOT WANNA PLAY CAR GAME, WATCH DOLPHIN SHOW

*Daddy asplode*

Himu · « **Reply #15 on:** October 05, 2006, 11:57:30 PM »

Is she watching Flipper? This is one of the reasons I can't wait to have kids. They're so fun to be around.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #16 on:** October 05, 2006, 11:58:30 PM »

Children suck. That's why if I have them, I'll make sure to name them Xavier you they're born at the ripe age of 35

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #17 on:** October 06, 2006, 12:06:17 AM »

no, she has this tin of Undersea Explorer DVDs called "Mysteries of the Deep". There are three episodes on it that she'll request: Shark Frenzy; Whales; and Dolphins. I'm not shitting you in the slightest when I say that she knows more about marine biology than me -- she can identify fish and shit I never even heard of. She knows like twenty different sharks and twenty different dolphins and fuck knows how many different whales. She corrected me angrily when I said "oo, a tiger shark" -- "NO DADDY LEMON SHARK" *tears up*

WHATEVER I DON'T LIKE THE OCEAN ANYWAY

It's adorable when she makes her "ek ek ek ek ek" dolphin noise

Himu · « **Reply #18 on:** October 06, 2006, 12:09:29 AM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on October 05, 2006, 11:58:30 PM

Children suck. That's why if I have them, I'll make sure to name them Xavier you they're born at the ripe age of 35

Kids are cute! You just suck at being good with em! $:-\$

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #19 on:** October 06, 2006, 12:10:59 AM »

This bubble you've built around her will burst sometime, Drinky. It's best to take her to a tuna packing plant now, before her hopes and dreams are shattered.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #20 on:** October 06, 2006, 12:13:31 AM »

Quote from: Himuro on October 06, 2006, 12:09:29 AM

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on October 05, 2006, 11:58:30 PM
Children suck. That's why if I have them, I'll make sure to name them Xavier you they're born at the ripe age of 35

Kids are cute! You just suck at being good with em! $:-\$

I'm joking. I like kids, but I prefer animals. Cats FTW

CrystalGemini · « **Reply #21 on:** October 06, 2006, 06:40:20 AM »

I love children.

That's the only thing that makes my job bearable.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #22 on:** October 06, 2006, 07:17:29 AM »

Be nice to dolphins? Pfffffft.

Kids say the darnest things.

etiolate · « **Reply #23 on:** October 06, 2006, 07:23:25 AM »

Does she like manta rays? Cuz then she'd be uber cool.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #24 on:** October 06, 2006, 12:07:07 PM »

She likes manta rays. She loves ALL the creatures of the sea.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #25 on:** October 06, 2006, 12:15:21 PM »

She better hate sting rays! Sting rays killed Steve Irwin!

demi · « **Reply #26 on:** October 06, 2006, 12:32:17 PM »

What a stupid conversation.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #27 on:** October 06, 2006, 12:42:04 PM »

Deleted by user

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #28 on:** October 06, 2006, 01:55:11 PM »

Quote from: demi on October 06, 2006, 12:32:17 PM

What a stupid conversation.

I'll remember that observation the next time I discuss Kantian epistemologies with a two-year-old.

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #29 on:** October 06, 2006, 01:58:05 PM »

Deleted by user

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #30 on:** October 06, 2006, 01:58:30 PM »

Don't confuse demi with big words like 'observation'.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #31 on:** October 06, 2006, 02:01:26 PM »

malek, rather, I was pointing out that it's kinda hard NOT to have a stupid conversation with a two-year-old -- or am nintenho.

brawndolicious · « **Reply #32 on:** October 06, 2006, 03:37:27 PM »

Quote from: Drinky Crow on October 06, 2006, 02:01:26 PM

malek, rather, I was pointing out that it's kinda hard NOT to have a stupid conversation with a two-year-old -- or am nintenho.

I'm flattered.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #33 on:** October 06, 2006, 06:57:11 PM »

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #34 on:** October 06, 2006, 07:05:29 PM »

Quote from: Drinky Crow on October 06, 2006, 02:01:26 PM

malek, rather, I was pointing out that it's kinda hard NOT to have a stupid conversation with a two-year-old -- or am nintenho.

Spongebob Squarepants is pretty deep though

Azih · « **Reply #35 on:** October 08, 2006, 03:43:43 PM »

I like talking to kids. They're dumb.

The Miles Trahan Burger Experiment · « **Reply #36 on:** October 08, 2006, 03:52:50 PM »

Who are you?

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #37 on:** October 08, 2006, 03:59:28 PM »

Azih is awesome

Azih · « **Reply #38 on:** October 08, 2006, 08:35:47 PM »

I got cred yo.

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Author Topic: Conversations with very small children. (Read 3154 times)