Author Topic: Kingdom of Heaven: So basically Orlando Bloom is the reason muslims hate the US (Read 4530 times)

TVC15 · « **on:** October 28, 2007, 07:07:13 PM »

Spoilers, of course.

I have not finished the movie yet, but if Orlando Bloom had just married that bitch and become the King Consult of Jerusalem, the entirety of the past 1000 years of muslim-christian relations would be warmer? All because he couldn't live with having that asshole Frenchie killed? Guess what, Orlando: you're responsible for 3000 of your own countrymen going down in WTC on 9/11, you twisted elf fuck.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #1 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:10:07 PM »

pretty much! ELVES CAUSED 9/11.

FlameOfCallandor · « **Reply #2 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:10:38 PM »

Don't forget that more US soldiers died in Iraq then the WTC.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #3 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:12:31 PM »

eva green was hotty totty in that movie, btw. i would let her wash my feet and salaam my aleikum.

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #4 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:13:42 PM »

Quote from: Professor Prole on October 28, 2007, 07:12:31 PM

eva green is hot all the time

fixed

warcock · « **Reply #5 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:13:53 PM »

Isnt bloom australian you groin lover, you should know this. Eva green is not hot, i cant stand freckles. Bleach her face for AAA material

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #6 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:14:09 PM »

yes, but casino royale was so dull that i forgot to jerk

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #7 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:14:49 PM »

I've gotten use out of that DVD.

Himu · « **Reply #8 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:14:50 PM »

Gay Boy · « **Reply #9 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:15:51 PM »

Kingdom of Heaven

Ridley Scott's best flick since Blade Runner.

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #10 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:16:09 PM »

cajole:

warcock · « **Reply #11 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:16:47 PM »

ridley scott is my fav direct0r of all tim3. Im more of a flash guy then a substance guy. Moving turkeys aint my jive yknow.

Himu · « **Reply #12 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:16:56 PM »

Quote from: CajoleJuice on October 28, 2007, 07:14:49 PM

I've gotten use out of that DVD.

Yeah I think I've fapped to a lil Vesper action a few times. Maybe 3.

TVC15 · « **Reply #13 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:17:38 PM »

Quote from: warcock on October 28, 2007, 07:13:53 PM

Isnt bloom australian you groin lover, you should know this. Eva green is not hot, i cant stand freckles. Bleach her face for AAA material

Australia is basically the US with shittier money and uglier minorities. There, somebody said it.

Gay Boy · « **Reply #14 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:18:02 PM »

You guys really need to use google properly. She has done a movie with TONS of nudity and sex scenes in it. I forgot the name though.

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #15 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:18:29 PM »

I've seen The Dreamers, Gay Boy. Only a cigarillo wouldn't remember the name.

warcock · « **Reply #16 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:18:40 PM »

BUT THE KANGAROOS

Gay Boy · « **Reply #17 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:20:06 PM »

Quote from: CajoleJuice on October 28, 2007, 07:18:29 PM

I've seen The Dreamers, Gay Boy. Only a cigarillo wouldn't remember the name.

I haven't seen it. I just uh used pictures. $:-\$

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #18 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:20:31 PM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on October 28, 2007, 07:17:38 PM

Quote from: warcock on October 28, 2007, 07:13:53 PM
Isnt bloom australian you groin lover, you should know this. Eva green is not hot, i cant stand freckles. Bleach her face for AAA material

Australia is basically the US with shittier money and uglier minorities. There, somebody said it.

CajoleJuice · « **Reply #19 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:21:06 PM »

Quote from: Gay Boy on October 28, 2007, 07:20:06 PM

Quote from: CajoleJuice on October 28, 2007, 07:18:29 PM
I've seen The Dreamers, Gay Boy. Only a cigarillo wouldn't remember the name.
I haven't seen it. I just uh used pictures. $:-\$

I came across it playing on IFC one day. It was GLORIOUS.

And

at TVC.

TVC15 · « **Reply #20 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:21:37 PM »

Wait a second, why does that bitch sister take off Edward Norton's mask after he dies? They have to do the old movie trope where the dude in the cool looking mask gets unmasked and looks like Ruzbeh. Yes, we knew he had leprosy, how about letting duder die in dignity? You were his sister for fuck's sake. What motivation would you have for that? It's disrespectful. What, did you really need to confirm that you were the better looking of the two siblings? This is precisely why all women are whores.

Himu · « **Reply #21 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:23:46 PM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on October 28, 2007, 07:21:37 PM

Wait a second, why does that bitch sister take off Edward Norton's mask after he dies? They have to do the old movie trope where the dude in the cool looking mask gets unmasked and looks like Ruzbeh. Yes, we knew he had leprosy, how about letting duder die in dignity? You were his sister for fuck's sake. What motivation would you have for that? It's disrespectful. What, did you really need to confirm that you were the better looking of the two siblings? This is precisely why all women are whores.

Ahahaha You're extra awesome today

Van Cruncheon · « **Reply #22 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:24:21 PM »

ed norton

cubicle47b · « **Reply #23 on:** October 28, 2007, 07:40:28 PM »

Did she take off his mask before or after realizing her kid had leprosy?

Eva Green in the Dreamers.

TVC15 · « **Reply #24 on:** October 28, 2007, 08:54:22 PM »

Hmmm, thinking I should do one more movie.

So far today, I have watched (starting at like 2am):

Dracula
The Fountain
The Brothers Grimm (this was my downtime movie after 2 movies I wanted to be attentive during)
Kingdom of Heaven DC (all of the above Blu Ray

The contenders for next (all in bd or hddvd):

Big Fish
300
The Usual Suspects
The Departed
Hot Fuzz (attempt 4!)
Shaun of the Dead
The Game (Fincher HD!)
Purple Rain

I am thinking either 300 or Purple Rain, so I could make it a full day of period costume dramas.

The Fake Shemp · « **Reply #25 on:** October 28, 2007, 08:57:39 PM »

drozmight · « **Reply #26 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:16:22 PM »

Orlando's Austrailian. He did it because he hates the US.

Is The Fountain any good?

TVC15 · « **Reply #27 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:22:55 PM »

Quote from: drozmight on October 28, 2007, 09:16:22 PM

Orlando's Austrailian. He did it because he hates the US.

Is The Fountain any good?

http://www.evilbore.com/forum/index.php?topic=13898.0

I didn't think it was megaton awesome, but it's really different and still really good.

Ichirou · « **Reply #28 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:33:04 PM »

Quote from: Gay Boy on October 28, 2007, 07:20:06 PM

Quote from: CajoleJuice on October 28, 2007, 07:18:29 PM
I've seen The Dreamers, Gay Boy. Only a cigarillo wouldn't remember the name.
I haven't seen it. I just uh used pictures. $:-\$

Do you even know who Bertolucci is? Wow.

EvilBoris · « **Reply #29 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:35:03 PM »

I'm sorry, since when is Orlando from Australia again?

Ichirou · « **Reply #30 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:36:44 PM »

Quote from: EvilBoris on October 28, 2007, 09:35:03 PM

I'm sorry, since when is Orlando from Australia again?

Since the English didn't want him.

drozmight · « **Reply #31 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:38:15 PM »

Austrailian, English... same thing.

I kjust didn;t look iut up first.

I'm gonna go rent the fountain.

Gay Boy · « **Reply #32 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:42:09 PM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on October 28, 2007, 08:54:22 PM

Hmmm, thinking I should do one more movie.

So far today, I have watched (starting at like 2am):

Dracula
The Fountain
The Brothers Grimm (this was my downtime movie after 2 movies I wanted to be attentive during)
Kingdom of Heaven DC (all of the above Blu Ray

The contenders for next (all in bd or hddvd):

Big Fish
300
The Usual Suspects
The Departed
Hot Fuzz (attempt 4!)
Shaun of the Dead
The Game (Fincher HD!)
Purple Rain

I am thinking either 300 or Purple Rain, so I could make it a full day of period costume dramas.

300 probably looks the prettiest but it is the worst movie of that list.

Ichirou · « **Reply #33 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:43:19 PM »

Quote from: Gay Boy on October 28, 2007, 09:42:09 PM

300 probably looks the prettiest but it is the worst movie of that list.

You didn't answer my question, Gay Boy. Do you know who Bertolucci is? Without looking his name up in Wikipedia?

Gay Boy · « **Reply #34 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:44:53 PM »

Quote from: Ichirou on October 28, 2007, 09:43:19 PM

Quote from: Gay Boy on October 28, 2007, 09:42:09 PM
300 probably looks the prettiest but it is the worst movie of that list.

You didn't answer my question, Gay Boy. Do you know who Bertolucci is? Without looking his name up in Wikipedia?

I rarely watch european foreign movies. If it isn't Run Lola Run I doubt I have seen it. I am not hip enough I guess.

TVC15 · « **Reply #35 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:48:30 PM »

Oh Gaybo, you have missed out on like so much good stuff. Nothing hip about it. If you aren't up to date on New Wave you are missing like 25% of 60s to modern cinema's influence.

I am watching 300. Oddly enough, the noise effect they use to make the film look gritty and not computery doesn't translate so hot, so the movie really doesn't look great compared to any of the previous ones I have watched to day. You'd think it would be the best, but those digital noise filters are tricky. The Shield uses one, too, and those normal DVDs upscale terribly because of it.

Gay Boy · « **Reply #36 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:49:31 PM »

I only got into "real" western cinema a few years ago I had some catch up to do.

Fresh Prince · « **Reply #37 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:49:44 PM »

Orlando is from South Africa, which is like Australia but with more black people, nazis and shittier money.

Ichirou · « **Reply #38 on:** October 28, 2007, 09:51:11 PM »

Quote from: Gay Boy on October 28, 2007, 09:44:53 PM

Quote from: Ichirou on October 28, 2007, 09:43:19 PM
Quote from: Gay Boy on October 28, 2007, 09:42:09 PM
300 probably looks the prettiest but it is the worst movie of that list.

You didn't answer my question, Gay Boy. Do you know who Bertolucci is? Without looking his name up in Wikipedia?
I rarely watch european foreign movies. If it isn't Run Lola Run I doubt I have seen it. I am not hip enough I guess.

These isn't some obscure arthouse director, dude. Bernardo Bertolucci is a major Italian filmmaker: 1900 (with Depardieu and De Niro), The Conformist, Last Tango in Paris (with Marlon Brando), The Last Emperor, Stealing Beauty (Liv Tyler gets nekkid, omg), and The Dreamers (Eva Greennnnnn).

Netflix The Conformist and 1900, at least.

Cyanista · « **Reply #39 on:** October 28, 2007, 10:24:42 PM »

There are very few movies funnier than Purple Rain.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #40 on:** October 28, 2007, 11:29:56 PM »

300>Kingdom of Heaven

Gay Boy · « **Reply #41 on:** October 29, 2007, 12:10:29 AM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on October 28, 2007, 11:29:56 PM

300>Kingdom of Heaven

you still havent seen KoH!

TVC15 · « **Reply #42 on:** October 29, 2007, 12:27:48 AM »

Quote from: Gay Boy on October 29, 2007, 12:10:29 AM

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on October 28, 2007, 11:29:56 PM
300>Kingdom of Heaven
you still havent seen KoH!

He probably saw 15 minutes of it edited on BET and is judging from that.

Phoenix Dark · « **Reply #43 on:** October 29, 2007, 12:29:06 AM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on October 29, 2007, 12:27:48 AM

Quote from: Gay Boy on October 29, 2007, 12:10:29 AM
Quote from: Phoenix Dark on October 28, 2007, 11:29:56 PM
300>Kingdom of Heaven
you still havent seen KoH!

He probably saw 15 minutes of it edited on BET and is judging from that.

You aren't truly gay if you don't think Bloom is sexy as FUCK. wtf dude I would give him a handjob and maybe a dick kiss

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #44 on:** October 29, 2007, 01:10:05 AM »

US is basically Canada with shittier money and dumber minorities. There, somebody said it.

TVC15 · « **Reply #45 on:** October 29, 2007, 01:55:11 AM »

Quote from: Malek: King of Kings on October 29, 2007, 01:10:05 AM

US is basically Canada with shittier money and dumber minorities. There, somebody said it.

Fuck you! Mupepes are definitely smarter than whatever the hell Arvies are!

Ichirou · « **Reply #46 on:** October 29, 2007, 02:06:48 AM »

Quote from: TVC 15 on October 29, 2007, 01:55:11 AM

Quote from: Malek: King of Kings on October 29, 2007, 01:10:05 AM

US is basically Canada with shittier money and dumber minorities. There, somebody said it.

Fuck you! Mupepes are definitely smarter than whatever the hell Arvies are!

oh shit

Flannel Boy · « **Reply #47 on:** October 29, 2007, 10:35:31 AM »

Arvies are still in the majority. Though not in Toronto. Our minorties are Harolds and Kumars.

Himu · « **Reply #48 on:** October 29, 2007, 11:09:55 AM »

Quote from: Phoenix Dark on October 29, 2007, 12:29:06 AM

Quote from: TVC 15 on October 29, 2007, 12:27:48 AM
Quote from: Gay Boy on October 29, 2007, 12:10:29 AM
Quote from: Phoenix Dark on October 28, 2007, 11:29:56 PM
300>Kingdom of Heaven
you still havent seen KoH!

He probably saw 15 minutes of it edited on BET and is judging from that.

You aren't truly gay if you don't think Bloom is sexy as FUCK. wtf dude I would give him a handjob and maybe a dick kiss

where's the no homo

Quote from: TVC 15 on October 29, 2007, 01:55:11 AM

Quote from: Malek: King of Kings on October 29, 2007, 01:10:05 AM

US is basically Canada with shittier money and dumber minorities. There, somebody said it.

Fuck you! Mupepes are definitely smarter than whatever the hell Arvies are!

But Arvies are so adorable no homo

bud · « **Reply #49 on:** October 29, 2007, 11:14:03 AM »

when i first saw this movie in theaters i was kinda disappointed because i expected a gladiator-esque movie, but i saw it again and liked it. i'm talking about the tc here. i'll watch the dc, which is supposed to be omg, soon.

norton <3

TVC15 · « **Reply #50 on:** October 29, 2007, 01:03:10 PM »

Reading about the TC, it sounds like they cut out like a good third of the plot. Like I'm not sure how they edited that much out without making the movie incomprehensible, or ruining th epacing. Which might explain the tc's reviews,

MrAngryFace · « **Reply #51 on:** October 29, 2007, 01:10:29 PM »

the tc was so bad, nothing really made sense.

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Author Topic: Kingdom of Heaven: So basically Orlando Bloom is the reason muslims hate the US (Read 4530 times)