Jamie Lee Curtis in Halloween is kind of a bitch

[TVC15]

I am watching Halloween right now (IN HD), and it has just dawned on me that Jamie Lee is a bitch.  I believe she died some sort of undignified death in either H20's ending or the beginning of the next movie, and let me tell you, stuck up princess cuntface deserved it.

I never really noticed this before, possibly because I kind of self-censor independent thought when watching most horror movies because you are more likely to get the intended effect from them if you don't, you know, think about what's happening.  Anyway, it's towards the beginning of the shenanigans, Michael has escaped and returned to Haddonfield, Illinois (which has a suspiciously very California-style high school), and he is shadowing the local high school meat curtain patrol and the homely bitch they keep around in order to make themselves feel better about their looks, aka Jamie Lee Curtis, who is like pushing 40 in this movie.

So we get to the scene where Jamie Lee and Hussie 1 are walking along the sidewalk, and Michael is in front of them, and he steps behind the bush and disappears just before Hussie 1 goes up to investigate.  Hussie 1 jokes, "You scared another one away, Jamie Lee," in reference to homely Jamie Lee's inability to score some dong.  Jamie Lee tellingly replies with "GUYS THINK I'M TOO SMART." 

But she's not being wry, or sarcastic, or funny, or anything.  She says that line like she believes it.  You want to know why nobody wants to bang you, Jamie Lee?  You're a motherfucking stuck up princess.  Three decades of history on this film tells us that your character is supposed to be some sort of virginal princess, but that's a flat out lie.  Jamie Lee wanted it the whole fucking time, and she just couldn't reel in the goods because she misconceived how the opposite sex thought of her.  No, Jamie Lee, we don't think you're "too smart,"  we think you are a hideos troll that should settle for a St. Bernard, or worse, a St. Cornelius.  So shut your fucking face and shitcan the snark. 

[bagofeyes]

tits

[TVC15]

She's such a fucking whore.  Ben Tramer would never go out with someone as snooty as her.

[Ecrofirt]

And yet, all Michael wanted to do was stick it in her pooter.

[TVC15]

Actually, I am beginning to question whether Michael really was psychotic.  Let's take a look at Doctor Loomis, his no doubt court appointed doctor.  As someone that's fiddled with the system, let me tell you that these psychologists and psychiatrists affiliated with the state, working in the slums of the court system, they're not generally stuck being in such a menial position because they are particularly skilled.  Other evidence?  Doctor Loomis spends the entire first act wearing a suit jacket that is approximately 2 sizes too small for him.  It's the kind of suit jacket I would expect a doctor to be wearing if he were, say, dancing around a pole in some extremely niche sort of strip club.

So we know Dr. Loomis isn't particularly skilled at his job, so I see no reason to assume that his diagnosis of Michael being a career psychopath was originally accurate.  I mean, look at it this way, this doctor, a man of science, believed that his patient, then a young boy, was a REAL manifestation of PURE EVIL.  Does this sound like a man of science that is grounded in any sort of reality?

"But Michael's behaviour proves his diagnosis!" you will say.  I say that it was a self-fulfilling prophecy.  Doctor Loomis spent 15 years telling Michael that he was PURE EVIL, all throughout his formative years.  Is it any surprise he came out that way?  Michael's homicidal tendencies are entirely a result of Loomis' "treatment."  Loomis is the one that should have been put away.  Michael was just a child that made an unfortunate mistake, and the terrible legal system put him under the watch of a perverse, sociopathic doctor not unlike the doctor from Hellraiser 2.  Halloween is a story of the bureaucracy of the juvenile legal system creating monsters.  Did society take anything away from this?  Any lessons?  No.  And it should be condemned for failing to learn, condemned to die via liberal application of Rob Zombie movies.

[demi]

She dies in Resurrection, he drops her off a roof

[TVC15]

She dies in Resurrection, he drops her off a roof

Hmmm, I was remembering a car accident or something, or was that just a fakeout?  Years since I've seen the newer ones.

[demi]

At the end of H20, she basically pins him against a van and a tree trunk, and chops his head off, but in Resurrection we find out Michael had actually swapped clothes with a paramedic (crushed his larynx prior so he couldnt speak) and she chopped the medics head off, causing her to submit herself into an asylum

[TVC15]

Ooooooh, okay, I remember now.  I kinda remember digging H20.

[Bloodwake]

LOL, analyzing Halloween.

[bud]

i've masturbated countless times to her ''strip'' scene in true lies.

her body used to be so fucking hot.

[The Fake Shemp]

Ben Tramer deserves better.

[Phoenix Dark]

Considering she's a genetically a man, this thread should be renamed "Jamie Lee Curtis in Halloween is kind of a dick"

Don't you love conservaporn? Throughout the movie Jamie shies away from pre-marital sex, doesn't do drugs, stay at home with her children - while all her San Fransisco value buddies get killed by zombie Jesus in a James T Kirk mask

[Madrun Badrun]

Shes a super bitch in all movies.

Ooooooh, okay, I remember now.  I kinda remember digging H20.

I liked it too.  It was my first pay-per-view movie from a hotel if I remember correctly. 

[TVC15]

Considering she's a genetically a man, this thread should be renamed "Jamie Lee Curtis in Halloween is kind of a dick"

Don't you love conservaporn? Throughout the movie Jamie shies away from pre-marital sex, doesn't do drugs, stay at home with her children - while all her San Fransisco value buddies get killed by zombie Jesus in a James T Kirk mask

That's the thing, Jamie Lee isn't virginal in the movie, as is often claimed.  She might be a a virgin, but she doesn't want to be--it's not by choice.  She wants Ben Tramer pounding her, but she's too much of a chickenshit to do anything about it.  And when Ben Tramer isn't proactive, Jamie Lee doesn't think it's because she is Coulter-esque, she thinks it's because she is TOO SMART.  Which probably is Coulter-esque.

[Phoenix Dark]

Considering she's a genetically a man, this thread should be renamed "Jamie Lee Curtis in Halloween is kind of a dick"

Don't you love conservaporn? Throughout the movie Jamie shies away from pre-marital sex, doesn't do drugs, stay at home with her children - while all her San Fransisco value buddies get killed by zombie Jesus in a James T Kirk mask

That's the thing, Jamie Lee isn't virginal in the movie, as is often claimed.  She might be a a virgin, but she doesn't want to be--it's not by choice.  She wants Ben Tramer pounding her, but she's too much of a chickenshit to do anything about it.  And when Ben Tramer isn't proactive, Jamie Lee doesn't think it's because she is Coulter-esque, she thinks it's because she is TOO SMART.  Which probably is Coulter-esque.

Sounds like the perfect house wife to me.

[Eel O'Brian]

What's the PQ like on the Bru Ray, TVC?  I've been hesitant about buying this, because it will be about the 5th time I've bought it on home video, and unless it's all WOW I dunno.

[TVC15]

What's the PQ like on the Bru Ray, TVC?  I've been hesitant about buying this, because it will be about the 5th time I've bought it on home video, and unless it's all WOW I dunno.

It's a pretty darned good transfer.  Things like titles and fashion aside, I could almost think this was made in the past decade. 

I'd still have difficult recommending it for more than 20 bucks though, just because everyone has double and triple dipped (or more) on this movie, and everyone has seen it a zillion times.  Plus even with it being a pretty great transfer, Halloween wasn't a movie you'd ever watch for impressive visuals.

[Eel O'Brian]

They have it at the Wall-Mark for $18.96.  I might have to snap it up if it's a noticeable improvement.

[TVC15]

They have it at the Wall-Mark for $18.96.  I might have to snap it up if it's a noticeable improvement.

It's definitely a different transfer than the cheapie non-special edition DVD I have.  I have no idea if they spruced up the latest SE transfer or what, but the image quality is really good for something from the 70s.

I am hoping I end up in a Kubrick mood over the weekend so I can check out the BDs I just picked up.

[Eel O'Brian]

It means I can sell that Halloween 2-disc Special Limited Edition I bought years ago, the one with the lenticular animation cover and the collectible postcards.  That fucker goes for upwards of $50 on ebay.  I'll just rip it for the special features.

[TVC15]

Special features on this:

Commentary with Carpenter, Jamie Lee, and Debra Hill

Fast Film facts (I believe this is through subtitles)

Halloween: A Cut Above the Rest featurette

Trailer

TV Spots

Radio Spots

Not as loaded as some of the other HD discs out there (The Fountain, Dracula, Shaun of the Dead, and Hot Fuzz are all LOADED), but at least they are all pretty decent ones.  It's also got uncompressed audio, if that is your bag.

[Eel O'Brian]

I sort of dig those text trivia tracks, and wish more companies would do them.  I like being able to watch the movie fully and glance at an interesting fact every now and again.